“I’m well aware that you can get home on your own, but if I were to tell Grace I left without you, can you imagine the earache she would give me?” He’s smiling, and I laugh with him, because I do know what she would say.
“Right, let’s go and see who we can introduce you to.”
He links his arm with mine, and after saying our goodbyes to everyone at our table, Frank introduces me to a few of the organisers of tonight’s event. I stand in awe of what the charity does, and I’m sure Frank has a sense of some of the things going through my mind. This is a charity I’m interested in learning more about, maybe even helping out. Although, I’m not sure in what capacity.
Every time we stop to talk, my eyes drift around the room, searching for the mysterious man I encountered in the bathroom, but he’s nowhere to be found. I’m a tad disappointed he’s already left. Probably found some girl who would put out in the bathroom, or anywhere else.
“Right, Miss, it’s about time I drop you home and see what trouble awaits me at mine.”
Poor Frank and Grace. I know they’ve done everything they can for Bethany, but if she’s still on drugs and having a baby, I can’t imagine what they’re going through. Bethany must remind Grace of my own mother. I know when I hear about Bethany going off the rails again, my thoughts turn to my mother and what the drugs led to… ultimately, her killing herself.
My body shivers, and it’s not down to the fact we’ve walked outside into the cool night air. No, my thoughts are now of a young woman finding her own mother face down on the living room floor with dirty used needles spread around the carpet. Tears fill my eyes as I get in the passenger side of Frank’s car.
“Are you okay?”
“Just thinking about things,” I reply without meeting his eyes as he starts the car. Frank knows me well, and he allows me to retreat into myself, be alone, lost with my thoughts. How can Bethany throw her life away? She’s been around to witness the pain and destruction it causes. She comes from a good family. Parents who love her and would do anything for her.
My mum she was different. Couldn’t give a fuck about me. All she cared about was her next fix and who could help her get it. As long as she had that, she didn’t care that her daughter would be starving.
I stare out the car window and try to shake the thoughts from my head because I know if I allow them to linger, they will consume my mind. I vowed to myself I wouldn’t dwell on the past.
When the car finally stops, I turn to face Frank. “Sorry I wasn’t great company on the drive back.”
“Nonsense. I knew you’d be lost in thought after tonight. Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”
“I’m just thinking about Bethany and my mum.”
His eyes crinkle as he rubs his forehead. “Ellie, you and I both know that someone with an addiction needs to want help in order to overcome their situation. And I fear…”
His voice trails off. “You think Bethany doesn’t want help?” I ask in a whispered voice.
“We both know the answer to that.”
Tears fill his eyes and I take his hand. “I’m sorry, Frank. If there was anything I could do, I would.”
“I know that, and so does Grace.”
“What are you going to do?” I ask.
“Hope that she stays with us long enough to give birth and then we’ll try and ensure the baby doesn’t end up…”
“Like me.” I finish his sentence, and as I do, I see sorrow in his eyes. “Are you sure you still want me to come over on Sunday?”
“Our house is your home, you never need to ask and let’s be honest; Grace would be disappointed if you didn’t.” I lean over and kiss him on the cheek. “Now, you should do some research on Ryan Jackson, and maybe also Colton Donavan.”
“Who is he?”
“He’s American.”
“Is that all you’re giving me?” I step out of the car.
“Yes. Now, go on. Get inside and I’ll tell Grace to make a nice roast for Sunday dinner.”
“Goodnight, and thank you for tonight.”
I close the car door and walk towards the house. I wave when I’m standing inside the doorway and watch on as Frank’s car pulls away.
I climb the stairs, now wondering about not one man, but three. I need to do my research and find out everything I can on Ryan Jackson, and also Colton Donavan. The man who will certainly keep me awake tonight is the mystery man and that kiss we shared in the ladies’ bathroom.
“Right you, get up.” I pull the covers over my head with a groan and turn my back to Dani. Why isn’t she at work? “Have you been in bed all day?”
Shit!
I jump and turn around. “You look like crap,” she says, laughing at me.
“What time is it?”
“Five, and I’ve brought home wine and ordered a takeaway. So, get up and tell me all about last night. Did you get lucky? Because I didn’t even hear you come home.”
I rub my eyes and try to comprehend the fact that I’ve slept all day. Which, after how long it took me to get to sleep because I kept thinking of my bathroom encounter with a stranger, doesn’t come as that big of a surprise. I was still wide awake at six a.m. My encounter with the mystery man had me tossing and turning all night. My imagination running through possibilities of what could’ve happened in that bathroom if I hadn’t put a stop to it.
Dani quickly pulls the bed sheets from my body, leaving me no time to react, or at least pull the covers around me. “Hey, I thought you were my friend.”
She smirks. “And that is why I’ve brought wine and ordered food. Now, you have until the food is delivered to grab a shower because you and I need to talk.”
“Fine,” I huff. “You can open the wine and have a drink waiting for me.”
“Now, that I can do,” Dani says before leaving my bedroom.
Time to get myself cleaned up, and then I have to face the inquisition from Dani because she just loves to hear gossip. Will I tell her about last night?
Maybe not.
The more it’s played over in my head, the crazier it sounds.
I shower and pull on warm, comfortable pjs in record time. Dani is sitting at the kitchen table with wine poured and Chinese containers and plates waiting. “Well, you look… fresher.”
“I feel it now that I’ve slept.” I pick up a plate and put some food on it.
“Why didn’t you sleep last night? And more importantly, did someone keep you awake?” Dani has never been shy about speaking her mind.
I take a mouthful of food, buying me some time before I speak. She stares at me, waiting in anticipation or maybe it’s a sign of frustration, as she’s drumming her fingers on the wine glass. “What?” I finally ask.
“You. This is not you. The Ellie I know and love is never this shy or reluctant to tell me information. What kept you awake all night?”
“Okay, well I came home at a reasonable time, Frank dropped me off. So, it’s not my fault you were fast asleep and didn’t hear me come in. You do know you snore?”
“No, but thanks for telling me. Is there anything you’re not telling me about last night?” I take another mouthful of food and shake my head. “Well, we can eat and have a drink and we should talk about the very handsome Ryan Jackson.”
“You seem to know a lot about him,” I say, grinning, although why I don’t really know. But something about the way Dani says his name and the look on her face tells me I should really find out everything about the man I’ll be interviewing.
“Of course I do. It’s about time you get to see who he is.” Dani moves and grabs her laptop then plops herself back into the chair, getting comfortable. “Let’s do this.”
She types in her password bringing her laptop to life. I lift my glass of wine and take a drink, watching as she types his name into the search bar.
“Stop. Can you check out Colton Donavan first?” I ask.
Dani lifts her head, her forehead crinkled with lines as she silently questions why but
doesn’t ask. Instead, she presses delete and then re-types.
“Bloody hell! He’s hot. Like crazy hot. If you’re going to tell me you’ll be interviewing him, I want to be there. I’d happily have his babies.”
I look at the picture she has just enlarged on the screen before us and she’s not wrong. The man has such a dazzling smile as he looks away from the camera. My guess would be the woman in his life is just out of shot. He’s standing by a race car, and I might be wrong, but to me it looks as though Colton Donavan has won a lot more than just a race. The screen changes and another image flashes up; this time Colton and a woman. His attention is completely on the woman he’s holding securely in his arms. A couple in love…
“Ellie! Earth to Ellie.”
“What?”
“You have that look in your eyes. You know, that one where you have a story in your head. Whereas I’m so disappointed to see your Colton Donavan is a happily married man. Damn he and I won’t be having any gorgeous babies together,” she mocks, placing her hand on her heart.
“Yes, they are happy and in love deeply, but they’ve not been without troubles,” I say with my eyes still on the screen.
“What do you know that I don’t?”
“I don’t know anything about either of them. Frank just told me I should do some research.”
“Ah, okay. Well, Colton is married. Her name is Rylee. They both do a lot of charity work, mainly with orphaned children. He’s an accomplished race car driver, winning in various events. Although, it says here he was involved in a really bad accident during a race and had to be air-lifted to hospital. It seems it was touch and go.”
“Okay, so I now know a bit about Colton.”
“Yes, you do. Now, onto the hot, single Ryan Jackson, unless his marital status changed suddenly overnight.” The screen changes.
“Shit!” I splutter.
I cover my now open mouth with my hand and stare at the image in front of me. This is crazy.
It can’t be. No. Surely not.
“Now, what the hell am I missing?” Dani grabs my shoulders and turns me to face her.
I don’t know what I’m supposed to tell her. Last night doesn’t make any sense to me. But how do I explain this? Now at least I know who Ryan Jackson is because I’ve already met him.
“Ellie, spill it. Because I know you’re keeping something from me. That look on your pretty face tells me I’m missing something.”
“Are you sure that’s Ryan?” I ask, my eyes shifting around the kitchen.
“Yes, that’s Ryan, and…?”
“And I kissed him last night.”
She stares at me open-mouthed. “Holy shit. Are you for real? No way!”
“I wish I could say no, but yes, he kissed me last night in the ladies’ bathroom.” Hearing myself say it out loud, it does sound crazy. Ryan Jackson, some hot-shot racing driver, followed me and wanted me. Why? Did he know I’d be the one covering all his stories for the newspaper? Was he testing me?
“I’m in shock.” She stands and paces the room with her wine glass in her hand, taking a few slurps. It’s not very often Dani is speechless, and I’m unsure what to do. She’s mumbling, not making any sense, and that’s not helping my already high anxiety levels.
I’ve kissed Ryan Jackson, and I’m meant to be interviewing him. I click on the laptop, pulling up some much-needed information. Why couldn’t I have done this last night before I went to the charity function? At least then I would’ve been somewhat prepared when he entered the bathroom. I scan through the information: hair, eye colour, I know all that. Height, weight, age, he’s twenty-seven, which kind of surprises me when I read the tournaments and championships he’s already won. It’s a long list. Ryan started kart-racing when he was only ten years old and won the British kart championship only a year later.
When he was fourteen, he signed with McLaren and Mercedes-Benz Young Driver Support Programme, where he was given the support and backing he needed to train and develop his skills.
He’s achieved so much, and here’s little old me. I’d never even heard his name until yesterday and he’s from Glasgow. Some bloody reporter I am, not even knowing anything about him.
I look away from the laptop and Dani is still pacing the floor, mumbling. “Dani, for fuck’s sake, can you sit down?”
She pauses and takes another slurp of wine. “You do know this is fucking insane.” She sits back down. “I don’t even think I can eat now.”
“Well, that’s up to you, but I’m hungry so I’ll be eating.”
“But we need to talk about this. You’ve kissed Ryan Jackson and you’re going to be working with him.”
“We can talk all night, but first things first. I need this food and some more wine.” She’s staring at me as though I have horns. I know she wants details, but it can wait until I eat, then I’ll tell her everything. Maybe it will help me make sense of this situation.
Or maybe it won’t.
Chapter 4
Dani is my best friend, but bloody hell, she talked all damn night about the possibilities of what might happen the next time I see Ryan. Every possible scenario, she thought and spoke about it. And the drunker she got, the wilder her imagination became.
Some of the stuff she was saying is unrepeatable, although we had a good laugh about what Felicity would do and say, not only when she finds out I’m the one covering this story, but that he and I have shared a kiss. Dani laughed for hours about that and has said she wants front row seats to see Felicity’s reaction when I tell her.
I love Dani dearly, but I wish I hadn’t told her because I’m sure I’ll be meeting Ryan with Frank at some point this coming week and I’m nervous about that. I’ll need to try and push all thoughts of Ryan Jackson to the back of my mind.
I park my car in Frank’s driveway. Sunday afternoon, and I’m usually always excited to come here for lunch with him and Grace, but today will be so different. I’m sure tensions will be flowing with Bethany home, especially if she’s still on drugs.
As I get out of the car the front door opens, Grace stands looking her immaculate self, although a little tired. Her dark brown hair is neatly tied back, giving me full view of the stress she’s under. She’s still managed to put on a little make-up but that doesn’t hide the tiredness around her eyes.
“There’s my beautiful girl. Come and tell me all your news.” She pulls me into a warm embrace. “I need to hear all good things today.”
I take a step back and notice the worry lines around her dark eyes seems deeper. “Are you okay?” I ask, my voice full of concern for the woman who has always looked out for me.
“I am now. Just seeing you makes me happy. Now, come on. You can tell me all about work and the charity function. Oh, and Dani, how is she?”
I link my arm with Grace’s. “Dani is good, and work is just work.”
“Don’t let Frank hear you, say that. For him, it’s his life.”
“That’s not quite true. His family is his life, you know that,” I say as we walk through her home toward the family kitchen.
“I know, sweetheart, and that does include you.”
Frank is by the stove stirring something in a pot, and if I know him, it will be the gravy to go with roast beef. I walk across the kitchen to him and kiss his cheek.
“Ah, Ellie. I hope you’re hungry?”
“Always, especially for roast. Do I smell Yorkshire puddings too?”
“Yip. Good old Mum and Dad go all out for Sunday dinner.”
I turn at her voice. I know she’s pregnant, but it still comes as a surprise when I take her in. Her once long, dark hair looks dirty and matted. Her face is drawn and hollow, and her skin is lifeless. She looks gravely ill, under-nourished, and almost skeleton-like, except the very noticeable bump.
“Hey, you,” I say, stepping closer to her. I’m unsure about cuddling her because I don’t want to hurt her. “I wish I could say you look well.” Instinct kicks in, and I wrap my arms around her t
iny frame. “Beth, I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you,” she says with tears in her eyes. I look at Frank and Grace who are now standing side-by-side watching us. “I wish things were different,” Bethany says softly.
“There’s still time to change,” I say, looking into her dark, lifeless eyes.
“No, there’s not,” she whispers against my neck. “Now, Mum wants me to eat, so I suppose I should at least try.”
I nod because I don’t know what else to say. “Can I help with anything?” I ask turning to face Grace as feelings of helplessness spread quickly through me for Bethany.
“No. Just sit down with Bethany and dinner will be two minutes.”
I help Bethany sit down first as she is really off balance before I sit down next to her and she takes my hand in hers, holding it tightly as though she’s scared to let me go. She’s not the only one who wishes things were different. I’m struggling to see her like this, a million miles away from the girl she once was. My friend who was always there for me whenever Grace dragged me from my mother’s care. Bethany never argued when I came to stay; she was always happy to see me.
Today, I wish more than anything Bethany had never gotten mixed up with the wrong crowd, because today, all I can see is the same harrowing look my mum had on her face in the weeks before her death. And that terrifies me.
Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath in an attempt to control the overwhelming emotions sweeping through me. I can’t let Grace see me like this, because I have this awful feeling that in the coming weeks and months, she’ll need my support, the same way I needed her.
Frank and Grace bring over all the food. It looks incredible, but after seeing Bethany and hearing her words, I’m not sure I’ll be able to eat that much. There’re so many questions in my head that I want to ask, but even I know that would be inappropriate and insensitive.
“Tuck in, girls,” Frank says, taking his seat as Grace passes me the dish with roast potatoes.
“We’ll try,” Bethany says softly as she puts some meat on her plate. She’s trying for her parents, but it’s there in her eyes, she’s already given up. She hasn’t even got it in her to fight for the sake of her unborn child.
Collision: A Driven World Novel (The Driven World) Page 3
