He dips between my legs. My eyes close and I smile when I feel his heated breath against my skin. With the first taste, I hear him groan. He puts his hands on my arse, pulling me closer to his face. Oh dear God. Every delicate touch and lap of his tongue is pushing me towards a finish line and I don’t want that. I want to feel. I don’t want to race. Some things are better enjoyed slower and this is one of those things.
Slow and steady.
My desire is pushing me toward that winning flag, the one he’s already claimed. There’s something warm and tender about his touch, in contrast to the other times we’ve been in a similar position. Hope spreads through me as I arch my back.
My stomach clenches, my legs tighten, and warmth quickly flows through my veins. “Please, Ryan. I need you inside me.”
He lifts his head, crawling slowly up my body. “I need you. Any way I can get you is how I’ll take you.”
I throw my arms around his neck, pulling him toward me. Our mouths crash together. Every nerve ending in my body is alive, buzzing with desire, waiting on a dangerous collision.
But this is a collision that should come together.
His hands explore my back, pulling me closer until there’s no distance between us, no air to breathe. I gasp, but his mouth covers the noise as he pushes deep inside me and stills.
He pulls back slowly, breaking our kiss at the same time. “You’re mine whether you want to be or not. I don’t ever want to let you go.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” I say, staring at him.
He pushes back deep inside me and begins to move, slowly, and you’d think painfully from the look on his face. He grinds against me, his damp skin sliding over my body, my breasts aching, his eyes on mine.
I moan as he pulls back, missing the connection between us. A small smile tugs at the corners of his lips as he pushes back inside me. This is a collision both of us welcome. Pleasure builds and I’m close to the end as I cry out.
He stops grinding and pulls back.
“Ryan…”
He thrusts harder this time. I push toward him, still with my hands around his neck, not wanting to let him go. He thrusts harder and faster, sending us toward the finishing line.
Ryan moves, pulling me with him until we’re lying on our sides facing each other, our ragged breathing slowing until we’re both in control. There’s a comfortable silence between us as we lie on the sofa.
“I have a few things to do tomorrow, what about you?” he asks, pulling me closer. I rest my head against his chest, listening and feeling his heart beating. I swear our heart rates are in sync with the other.
“I could write up an article about you and Colton and send it over to Les and then the paper. I’m thinking I’ll leave the hospital until tomorrow night.”
“That sounds good. So, you don’t need to be in the office?”
“No, why?”
“Because I’m thinking it would be nice to come home to you here.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. There’s nothing I’d like more than to know that you’re here at home waiting for me.”
“I’ll be here.” I’m not sure why, but I sense it’s important to him to have me here tomorrow. I snuggle in and close my eyes, not wanting to move.
“Thank you, sweetheart.” He presses his lips to my head, moving the stray hair away from my face.
Chapter 34
“What do mean the baby is missing? How the hell can that happen?” I stare into the mirror; my face is ashen. The hairs on the nape of my neck lifts. My body shakes uncontrollably as I listen to Frank. I can hear Grace’s screams in the background.
“Frank, how can she just go missing?” I ask, lowering my voice. I wish Ryan was here with me.
“Bethany visited her.”
“But she left. She can’t just walk into a hospital and take a baby. Where is she now?”
“We don’t know.”
“Have you called the police?”
“Yes, the doctors have.”
“Are you still at the hospital? Because I’ll come to you. I should be with you.”
“Yes, but stay where you are. I’m not sure why but something tells me it will be you she makes contact with.”
“Okay, but I’m at Ryan’s house in the country.”
“I’ll call you if there’s any news and if you hear from her.”
“Of course. I’ll contact you if she does. Stay in touch.”
We end the call and I have no idea what to do. Why would Bethany take her? I’m not sure we’ll get the answer to that.
At least I’m hoping I’ll get an answer to how Felicity got her information, eventually. Her own father has suspended her for the time being after I passed on my opinion on what had happened.
I’m just glad I wasn’t in the office yesterday to witness her meltdown when her father approached her. Frank told me she there in her chair, her mouth opening and closing like a goddamn goldfish as she stared at her father before screaming that I was just a little scheming bitch.
I don’t have the energy or time to spend scheming. However, she’s spent a lot of time trying to put me down over the last few years, which I don’t get.
I wander through the house. It’s very quiet, almost too quiet. I was looking forward to just relaxing today, reading a book, maybe cooking dinner later for the two of us. And now I have thoughts of Bethany removing her baby from the hospital. What sort of state is she in? Is she back on drugs?
For the baby’s sake, I hope not.
In the kitchen, I stick the kettle on and then open the patio doors. The breeze is welcoming as it hits my face. Trees sway and I can hear is the sound of birds tweeting in the distance. Hopefully, sometime in the future, Ryan could give me a tour of the grounds. It looks as though he has so much land.
The clicking of the kettle grabs my attention. I turn and step back inside to make a cup of tea. With my tea in hand, I wander back into the front room. I’m just about to sit down when a car comes to a stop outside. I look out the window and gasp.
It’s not Ryan.
Shit. My phone must still be the kitchen. My heart is beating out of control in my chest, but I try to take a few deep breaths as I walk quickly toward the front door.
I open the door. Her eyes narrow on seeing me and her posture loosens. She tilts her head to the side. My eyes dart to the baby in her arms and relief sweeps through me as everything looks okay, but I won’t know until I get to see her. She has a bag at her feet.
“Hey, you,” I say softly, taking note that the cab isn’t going anywhere.
“Err, is Ryan not here?” She glances around.
“No, but he shouldn’t be long.”
“It doesn’t matter. It’s you I need to see.”
“Do you want to come in? I’ve just made a cup of tea.”
“I don’t have time. He’s waiting on me.” Bethany nods toward the cab driver. She looks okay. On edge, but not on drugs. That’s a good thing.
“Ellie, please. I need to get going.”
“Okay,” I say, not understanding what she wants. Money?
“Take her. I want you to look after her. She deserves her parents to be in a loving relationship.” She takes a step toward me, thrusting the baby into my arms. “I need you. Please, Ellie. I’ll never ask anything else from you.” I stare down at the perfect little girl in my arms, sleeping soundly and so content.
“Bethany, we can’t do this. It’s not right.”
“What’s not right is that bitch used both of us and Ryan in an attempt to further her career.”
“How do you know that?” I ask as she takes a step backward.
“Because I overheard one of the nurses talking, and it turns out she and Felicity are friends.” Well, that answers some of my questions on how she knew so much. “I promise I won’t ever return and upset any of you. All I ask is that you love her. Give her everything that you never had.”
Tears fill my eyes because, all of a sudden, I realise
this is probably the last time I’ll ever see Bethany.
“Please stay,” I beg her, with tears falling.
“I’ll always love you. Can you tell Mum and Dad I’m sorry?”
She runs toward the waiting cab, getting in and slamming the door. “No!” I scream as the cab pulls away. The baby in my arms cries and wriggles. I pull her tight to me, rocking her slightly as my tears fall.
I stand staring into the distance until the cab is completely out of view.
“Well, baby girl, what are we going to do?” I pick up the bag and enter the house, closing the door behind me. I need to call Frank and Grace, but first I need to get this little one settled.
“Ellie, where are you?” It’s Annie. Thank goodness; she can help me.
“Here,” I call out, walking toward the kitchen, baby in one arm and the bag in my other hand.
“Oh, heaven forbid. What’s going on? Let me take that for you.” She takes the bag from my hand before looking at the precious baby. “Oh, my. Isn’t she perfect?”
“She is. Just a pity her mother doesn’t think so.”
“Is that who left in the cab? I was walking up the other path when I heard it. I was coming to make dinner for you both. Would you like me to take her?” she asks, putting the bag on the kitchen table.
“Yes. I need to make a phone call.” I hand her the baby and look for my phone.
Annie sings a lullaby softly and it’s not long before the baby’s cries stop. I find my phone where I left it, right beside the kettle. Time to call Frank.
“Ellie?” he questions answer on the first ring.
“She’s been here.”
“Is she okay? What about the baby?”
“Baby is fine. I have her.”
“Grace, it’s fine. Ellie has the baby. What about Bethany?”
“I couldn’t get her to stay. I’m sorry.” I watch as Annie looks so at ease.
“Don’t be sorry. We’re about half an hour from yours. We’ll be there as soon as we can.”
“I’m not at home. I’m still at Ryan’s.”
“That’s okay.” I give Frank the address before ending the call.
“I should call Ryan,” I say to Annie.
“There’s no need. He and Bob should be here in five minutes. Bob called me, wanted me to make sure you were still here. Now you take this little one and I’ll see what’s in this bag for her.”
“Why are they on their way back?”
“Bob didn’t say. Ah, here is what I think this little one needs.” Annie takes out a few cartons of ready-made unopened baby milk and brand new bottles. She also places a large brown envelope on the table. “I’ll have to sterilise these first before we can use them,” she tells me. “How about you go and change her first and I’ll be through with her milk as soon as possible?”
I nod, taking a nappy and wipes, completely unsure about what I’m doing. How hard can this be?
Damn near impossible is the answer, but not quite. I did manage it, eventually.
“There, gorgeous. That’s you all clean. Now to get you fed,” I say, rocking her in my arms and gazing at her, wondering how the hell Bethany walked away and left her. I turn, hearing footsteps, and Ryan is in his own front room looking lost.
He doesn’t look like the man who left here happy and content this morning.
Bob and Annie stand in the doorway, Annie with the bottle of milk in her hand. Bob holds her shoulder as she’s about to pass him. My eyes on Ryan, he now knows what I’ve known since her birth.
How the hell do we cope with this?
I step toward him; his eyes are filled with unshed tears. Emotions are running wild between us; I can feel it in the air surrounding us. My man is nervous, and it shows. This grown man who races around the track at speeds up to two hundred miles per hour, putting his life in danger, is turning into a quivering wreck before me.
“Well, buddy, there’s someone who would like to meet you.” Our eyes meet and the first tear falls. “Come on, beautiful girl. Your daddy needs a cuddle.” He holds out his arms and I place his daughter into them. I don’t step back because he needs me. They both need me.
He gazes at her through his tear-filled eyes and this has to be the most perfect moment I’ve ever witnessed. “She’s really mine,” he says, sobbing.
“I knew she was and she’s a perfect little girl.”
“My life will have to change.”
“It doesn’t have to. That choice is up to you.”
“No, it does. You both deserve the best of me.”
His words take me by surprise. “You’re pretty special the way you are.”
“Tears and all?”
“Yip, tears and all. Frank and Grace are on their way here and probably the police.”
“Will they take her away from me?”
“They can’t, but they are the best people I know in the world. All I ask is that you let them be her grandparents.”
“Sorry to interrupt you.” Annie steps into the room with the bottle in her hand. “I think she might need this sooner rather than later. The envelope in the kitchen is for you both.”
I glance at Ryan, but my mind is already thinking about what Bethany has written for us. “Now, Bob and I will go out and get you whatever this one needs for tonight, or until one of you is ready to go shopping. The essentials, because babies need a lot of things.”
“Thank you,” I say because Ryan is too busy watching his daughter. His eyes are filled with love, as they should be.
The crunching of tyres on the gravel outside has me turning toward the door. I need to speak with Frank and Grace, but I don’t want to leave Ryan, not when he needs me the most. “Annie,” I call out.
Ryan sits down with his daughter tucked into his arm and I sit beside him. He wraps his free arm around me. “I need you,” he whispers.
“I’m not going anywhere but she needs to be fed and you’ll have to decide on a name for her.”
“Oh!”
“Yes, oh.”
“Mia Jackson.”
“That’s a beautiful name.” I look up to her voice and Grace is standing before us, trying to keep herself composed. “We’ve brought a few things with us that you’ll need. We stopped at the house after your call.” I stare blankly at Grace.
“Grace, I’m sorry,” Ryan says.
“You have nothing to be sorry about. We can talk tomorrow or the next day, but for tonight, get to know your baby girl. Frank and I will always be here for you. There’s a doctor coming soon to check on her.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Then don’t say anything.” Grace leans down and kisses his forehead before placing a soft kiss on Mia’s head. She turns and walks out of the room. I leave Ryan and follow her. She’s out in the hall with Frank, Annie, and Bob. There’s a car seat on the floor and a Moses basket, and what looks like bags of clothes. Annie and Bob no longer need to go shopping tonight. “This is a mess,” I say.
“No, it’s not, sweetheart. We won’t allow it to be a mess, and I think that man in there won’t allow that either,” Grace says quickly.
Annie nods her head. “He’s a good man.”
“Sweetheart, you can take off the rest of the week, because I intend doing the same,” Frank tells me. “Work can wait while we deal with everything.”
“How about we all have lunch together?” I say.
“That would be lovely, but let’s give Ryan some time. We don’t want to make this hard on him, but we do want to play an active role in Mia’s life, and I meant that when I said it was a beautiful name. Now, go and get back to them and I’ll speak to you tomorrow when I’ll expect a full update on how she is.”
“Of course,” I say, trying my best to reassure Grace. I say goodnight to them.
Bob and Annie go straight into the kitchen and I’m sure she’s making a start on dinner. I grab the envelope, taking it back with me.
I stand in the doorway, watching him for a moment. “I know y
ou’re there.” I smile, walking toward him. “Is that it?”
“Yes.”
“Can you read it?”
I take a deep breath and open it.
“Ellie and Ryan,
I’m sorry to both of you for what I’ve done. Ryan, I should’ve told you I was pregnant, and Ellie, I’m sorry things have to end like this. You have been the best sister I could ever have asked for and I know you will be the best mother. She needs parents who will love her unconditionally and I’m never going to be that.
I’m glad you found each other, and I hope you have many wonderful years together raising a family surrounded by kids and grandchildren.
In that one night in the hospital, I saw the love between you that you might not even have admitted to each other. Love is special. When you have that, you hang on to it tightly and never let go.
I hope my decision doesn’t hurt either of you because that’s not my intention. I’m trying to do the right thing.
Ellie, I will always love you for your strength and determination. If I even had an ounce of that I’d have been a much better person.
Bethany x”
My tears fall and I can’t control them.
“She’s right about one thing. I do love you,” he says, pulling me to him.
“I love you,” I whisper.
Mia is sound asleep, and I sit cuddled into him, feeling so wanted and loved. Excited and scared about what the future holds for us, but guilt is lurking in the background about Bethany.
“There are people we should call,” I say, thinking about Dani.
“That can wait until tomorrow. The world doesn’t need an update now. This isn’t going to be easy and if the doctor says it’s okay, then for tonight, I want to just enjoy the two most perfect girls in my life. I’m sure we’ll have plenty to deal with tomorrow.”
“That sounds like a good plan.” I can drop Dani a text and tell her we need to speak tomorrow.
“Thank you for not giving up on me.”
“I never will.”
Epilogue
I’m not sure I’ve got what it takes.
Collision: A Driven World Novel (The Driven World) Page 23
