Love Like Crazy

by Emma Chamberlain

  "Not as much as that image. Thinking about you with other people makes me way more sad than Vic being a jerk about how you are in bed," I said.

  "Yeah," she breathed deeply and nodded. "I wish I could just lie and say it didn't happen. Vic was always pissing me off or getting me high on things. Sex was an outlet."

  "I'm glad you were with someone nice. It sounds like he was anyway," I replied.

  "Oh god. Logan's great. I suck," she pouted.

  "He's probably going to be fine with things, you know. I'm assuming he doesn't know anyway," I fished.

  "He hangs out with Vic so he probably knows. I'm sure he's confused. I always tried to be honest with him but I knew he was more into me. Like, I broke up with him but we kept having sex because I'm emotionally unstable."

  "Is he in love with you?" I asked.

  "I dunno," she said. "But I already told him it wouldn't work, I pretty much broke up with him but then we had that drunk hookup. So, I dunno. It’s been months though."

  "Oh well, I hope you guys can be friends if that's what you want," I said.

  "I dunno," Laura said. "Trying to be friends with people just complicates things."

  "Sometimes, but what do I know. You're the only person I've ever been with," I reasoned.

  "Have you tried to be friends with people who want to fuck you? It's not exactly a good time."

  "Just one," I said.

  "Yeah, okay," she smiled. "It doesn't count if you want to fuck them too."

  "I don't want to fuck her. I only want to be with you," I said.

  "Oh shit, sorry. I thought you were talking about me. Who's this then?"

  "Lindsey," I said.

  "Oh, right, craziness," Laura said, staring. "Anyway, it's a hard place to be for sure. I have no hope for it with either Vic or Logan at this point."

  "You'll make new friends then. We both will," I said.

  "We'll see, " Laura said.

  "Yes, we will. For now, we should go get food to go and go home. What do you say?" I asked.

  "I wanna eat in," she decided. "We never get to be outside our room. I hate that. Let's take our time."

  "Oh, yes, let's do it. I need food," I said.

  I scooted away and got up, offering her my hand. She took my hand and I pulled her up and into my body so I could hug her.

  "My girl," I whispered.

  "Mmm…" she hummed. "I love you."

  "I love you too," I replied.

  We went back to the diner and had our breakfast. The food was brought out to us when we sat down and we ate in peace. I didn't bring up Vic again and Laura didn't mention anything about the incident.

  We were back at our room, relaxing before it really hit me that this was the moment. My parents would be arriving in an hour and we would meet them at the field.

  I went down there almost every day. It was just another place in my life, a kind of scenery. I loved it there, the smell of fresh cut grass, wet metal, and the concession stand on game days.

  Laura didn't have a place like that here. Being in our room all the time got tiring for her and she felt like an alien everywhere else. She was so in between everything. She fit with me though. We were moulded for one another.

  She was changing for the game and I was watching her, appreciating her body and her thought process.

  "You look hot in everything," I commented.

  "Stop," she asked. Her cheeks colored red with embarrassment and she always tried to be cool which meant she actually was. Since I noticed her she noticed me back, scanning my face and my body.

  "Just telling the truth," I asserted.

  "The goal isn't to look hot," she reminded.

  "I know but you do anyway. Obviously, my parents won't be thinking about that but I do," I said.

  "Do they know about me? I mean, that were like… Together?"

  "Yes. I told them as soon as it happened," I said.

  I was wearing my warm ups and running shoes already so she was the only one that had to get ready.

  "Oh," she said, lost in her head. She'd taken off the dress she wore out with me and changed down into nice jeans without any rips and the most plain and normal sweater I'd ever seen her wear. But now she was checking herself in the mirror and not convinced. "I hate this," she said. "No matter what I try, it feels stupid."

  "It's not stupid. Just wear what you normally would and it'll be chilly so warm would be good. Since I won't be there to keep you from getting too cold," I said.

  I was laying back on my bed, propped up on my elbows, watching her try on clothes.

  She pulled the autumn rust colored hoodie off and paced the room again in her tucked in white turtleneck and high-waisted jeans. "This sucks," she muttered.

  "Hey, come here for a second," I said.

  I caught her off guard but she came over to me and stood close, hugging her stomach with one arm.

  Her fingertips stroked mine and she watched me. "What," she wondered sadly.

  I reached for her and pulled her down on top of me so I could hug her body and kiss her once.

  "They will love you and I swear you won't have any issues. You look good and you smell good. Oh, and you can form full sentences so it'll be great," I said.

  "Right," she smiled, trying to lighten up. My touch helped, she curled up ontop of me and kissed my cheek. "My parents would force Hanover to separate us if they ever found out." She rested against my body and lay still ontop of me.

  "I'm glad we have one sensible set of parents then. No offense but they suck. Why would you ever hate love?" I asked.

  "I dunno," she said sadly.

  "Oh well. Let's focus on good things," I suggested.

  "How," she pouted.

  "Like this," I said.

  I kissed her and tangled my hand in her hair, pulling her attention away from her dark thoughts.

  Her chest heaved against mine and she whimpered inside my mouth, sensitive.

  "See, good things," I said.

  "Mmm," she hummed, smiling. "Okay, yeah. This is a lot better," she pecked at me.

  "Yep," I replied.

  I kissed her deeper and pulled up the hem of her turtleneck so I could graze her sides with my nails.

  Surprised, she breathed into me and hummed again. It was so easy with her. Since before we even got together she craved me and reacted.

  "Baby, you are wonderful and I have no doubt that tonight is going to be great," I said.

  She moved up on me and kissed me deeper, pressing her hand to my breast and groped it. "This is better," she panted.

  "It is but we have to go soon," I pointed out.

  I knew she wanted me by the way she was breathing but she pulled back and tried to calm herself. She rested her forehead on my chest for a moment, then she gripped my clothes and rolled over onto her back by my side. The struggle was real.

  I turned on my side and placed my hand on her chest.

  "After we get back maybe we can pick up where we're leaving off?" I asked.

  She nodded and bit her bottom lip. It was frustrating. "If I survive until then," she said, taking my hand and holding it. "I really do feel crazy sometimes."

  "Why this time?" I asked.

  "Look at me. I can't even pick an outfit."

  "That's so normal though. People have that problem all the time.”

  "Yeah. Just not you," she reminded. "Anyway. It's not just one thing."

  "I do too. If I was meeting your parents I would have no idea what to wear. You're not crazy. You're stressing," I replied.

  "It's fine," she said, getting up from the bed and tucking her turtleneck back in as she stood. "Just wish you could stay with us."

  "Me too," I got up and sighed. “But I'll be there after the game for dinner. Then we have Sunday to ourselves," I said.

  Flowers and spice evaded my space as she turned to hug me, arms slipping up around my neck. A sweet kiss was placed on my cheek as she breathed me in. “Are you gonna win for me?” She teased.

  We
’d talked in length about how she thought she’d never date a jock or even a normal person if you boil it down. Our entire relationship was a surprise to her.

  "Yup, I'll get a hat trick and bring you the game ball as a prize," I teased back.

  “Yeah,” she laughed. “Okay, that sounded like a bunch of random words strung together.” When she was happy, it showed. The way she gazed at me, her features softened. The weight of the world slipped off of her, no longer bogging her down. It was temporary and I knew that but it was still nice.

  "Just means I'm gonna score three goals and bring you a trophy," I said.

  I pulled her toward the door and grabbed my letterman jacket off the chair for her. I swung it around and put it over her shoulders.

  “Oh wow, you know how I like balls,” she teased.

  "Okay, eww." My brow scrunched and I frowned. "That's just a no for any balls that aren't used in sports."

  I kissed her, trying to erase the idea of balls.

  She smirked and practically glowed since she had managed to make me uncomfortable. “Okay, no balls,” she sighed. “But you started it.”

  "True. I accept responsibility as long as we don't ever go near them. Also, you're far too proud of yourself there," I said.

  I opened the door and led her into the hallway.

  “Someone needs to be,” she shrugged.

  "I'm proud of you too, you know," I said.

  "Apparently not proud enough," she knocked into me. But then she took my hand and clung onto my arm.

  "Ridiculous," I scoffed.

  We walked out of the dorm and towards the back part of campus where the sports fields were.

  "I'm very proud, the most proud. No one else could be prouder," I babbled.

  "Well, that's very nice of you," she expressed.

  "Ah, I'm nice sometimes. Let's take the shortcut through the gym," I said.

  I pushed the door open and led our way through the quiet, dark building. Our footsteps rang loud in the hollow room. My parents would be near the entrance probably. I hadn't received a text from my dad yet but they were usually on time.

  "How do you feel?" I asked.

  We were almost there, maybe a few hundred yards away so I stopped.

  "Uh," she laughed nervously. "So good," she lied. "At least you're gonna have a good time," she smiled honestly.

  "It'll be fine. You're going to be impressive by just being you and we'll win, no offense, since it's your old school and all but yeah," I said.

  Laura started to laugh. "I can't say I know shit about Green Valley's sports teams but I do think they win everything," she mentioned. "All the sporty people at my school were high on their egos. Vic hated them."

  "We've beat them every year I've been here so we don't plan on stopping now," I gloated.

  "Oh wow. Okay, okay," she nodded, pretending to be a little intimidated by me. "Apparently rich kids take soccer. Who knew."

  "It's all that good air from turning up our noses at everyone else," I said.

  I put my arm around her and pulled her along toward the stadium. My phone vibrated and I got it out of my pocket.

  "It's my dad. They're meeting us at the entrance," I said.

  Where Laura had been joking and laughing before, now she was serious and pretending to be onboard. "Sounds good," she nodded.

  I squeezed her shoulder and pulled her closer. We walked slowly along the sidewalk, bypassing the parking lot.

  "Look, there they are," I said pointing.

  My dad waved and walked towards us. He was tall, blonde, and good looking. It wasn't my observation. When he came around the girls at school called him a hot dad, which was mentally traumatic for me. What was worse is that they said the same thing about my mom.

  She had shiny black hair, green eyes, and perfect, pale skin. The hair came from my grandma who was half Japanese. I'd taken after her more than dad but I still thought I might be adopted from time to time. They were way more attractive than me.

  "Laura, this is my dad, Evan Greenwood and that is my mom, Madeline. This is my girlfriend, Laura," I introduced.

  My mom came forward and put out her hand to Laura.

  "It's lovely to meet you, Laura," she said.

  "Nice to meet you too," Laura said. She took the offered hand and held it.

  My dad stepped forward and shook her hand next.

  "Charlotte never stops talking about you. It's nice to finally meet you," he said.

  "You too," Laura nodded. "When she talks about you guys it makes me jealous."

  "Jealous?" My mom asked.

  They were both smiling and happy. I knew my parents were genuine in their sentiments. They were open, kind people when they were around and I'd told them all about Laura's situation. My mom knew exactly what Laura meant though.

  "Yeah, you sound really sweet," Laura said.

  "I hope that doesn't mean that your parents aren't nice," I said.

  "Oh, no. No, I didn't mean it like that," Laura said, guilty.

  "Must be Charlotte. She's vicious," my dad said.

  "Hey!" I protested.

  "Just messing with you, kid," he said, pulling me into a hug. "It's good to see you."

  "You too but how's work? Have you been busy?"

  He nodded and put his other arm around my mom.

  "Yes, but I'm taking off for a month this summer and your mother and I are going to Europe for a few weeks at least and you're coming too," he said.

  "Oh, well… we can talk about that later, right? I've gotta get to the locker room," I said.

  I frowned and let go of my dad, going back to Laura. Summer was already complicated and it just got more so.

  "Of course," Dad replied.

  I kissed Laura on the lips and stopped to whisper.

  "I love you."

  This was different. My parents never went on vacation and now they were going so far away. I was supposed to go too.

  Ugh. I couldn't focus on this. I had a game to focus on. I could only imagine what Laura was thinking.

  "Score lots of goals!" Mom called.

  "I will," I said.

  "We can go in this way," Dad said.

  I saw them walk towards the entrance with Laura and I sighed. This had to go well. It would. I just hoped they wouldn't say anything that freaked Laura out.

  Chapter 32

  What the actual fuck. Europe?

  He mentioned it so quickly.

  My heart sank and my stomach hurt big time. All day it'd been like this curse. Like I just knew tonight wouldn't go well. I guess this was why.

  “You okay sweetie?”

  “What? Oh, yeah,” I lied. Her mom was so nice. Charli hadn’t said anything about this. A taste of acid rose in the back of my throat. I swallowed it back.

  “Where do you usually sit?”

  “Um.” I looked up to the home-side bleachers. They were filling up quickly. “Up here,” I spoke nervously. I climbed the stairs and they followed me up.

  “Well, this is nice,” her dad said.

  Without Charli I didn’t know what to do. This was foreign territory. Impressing parents wasn’t something I was good at.

  “Are your friends here?” Her mom asked.

  “Uh,” I looked around. “I dunno,” I laughed. Charli had only been meaning to help with that but really I sat near people I could stand during these things. I didn’t have good friends besides her.

  I sat down beside them and tried not to bounce my leg. The cold seeped through my thin jeans and that didn’t exactly help my desire to move around. People around me kept noticing Charli’s parents and talking and smiling with their families and friends. They were local royalty, I guess. I learned that about Charli pretty quickly.

  "Hanover must have been a big adjustment for you," Charli's mom said.

  "Oh. Yeah," I laughed. "That's an understatement actually."

  I realized I'd accidentally corrected her and then worried about that. "But Charli helped. I dunno how I'd be now if I hadn't
been put with her in our room."

  "Yes, she's good about helping people," she replied.

  Her dad was busy chatting with a guy on the bench behind us but her mom was focused on me.

  "So, it's a thing she always does?" I wondered. Charli had been pretty independent with me.

  "For people she loves, yes," she replied.

  "Well, she couldn't have loved me from the start," I objected.

  "No but she's a nice girl. We brought her up that way and she's naturally generous. Still, I know she's thought you were special from the start."

  "And I'll never understand," I smiled.

  Their whole family was far too easy to talk to.

  A whistle and the sound of a ball being kicked made my head snap toward the field.

  False alarm. They were still only showing off and warming up.

  Charli looked up and caught my eye from the field. She blew me a kiss and waved at her parents.

  "Go Charli!" Came from her dad.

  I laughed. It was a little embarrassing. Not sure why but it made me blush.

  I hid my face in my hands and groaned.

  Charli's mom sat beside me and I somehow knew that she was happy. A happy person.

  "I'm um, I'm gonna go and get a drink or something. Do you two want anything?"

  "No, we have water but we'll go down at halftime to get something. You go on. Have fun," she replied.

  She smiled at me and patted my hand before returning her attention to the field.

  I got up awkwardly and looked about me as I made my way down. The bleachers were full and there were even more people than I'd ever remembered there being at any of these Hanover games.

  I stared off at Charli and felt a little guilty. Soccer was this thing that she loved and she was always so happy when she played but her playing took her away from me and I kinda hated it because of that. Even then, it was only a little hate. It was still great to see her face when she scored a goal or be with her after she won a game. Charli loved the high of winning and I actually understood that a little bit. My family pretty much ruined sports for me.

  I'd honestly never been that good at anything.

  It was getting dark and the cold began to smother. I tucked my hands into Charli’s jacket and balled my fingers into tight little fists.

  There was a snack shack run by a few of the Hanover girls who liked to bake and build their resumes for marketing. They were honestly cute but we never really had a chance to talk. I waited in line with the other parents and kids.