Out of Alignment (Hearts & Horsepower #5)

by A. K. Evans

  I gave her a nod of agreement because it did make me feel better to know that I wasn’t the only one who was oblivious. I also realized that Elise owned Flynn Beauty, Kendall was a nurse, and Avery worked as the LT Motorsports business manager. Wanting to be certain I didn’t end up feeling like a fool again, I turned my attention to Scarlet and asked, “So, what do you do?”

  “I spend my days making people fall in love,” she answered.

  “What?” I asked, completely thrown by her response.

  “Fictional people,” Scarlet clarified. “I’m an author. I write romance novels.”

  “Wow,” I marveled. “That’s incredible.”

  “Yeah, I love it. And what I love even more is how I get so much inspiration from my friends,” she shared.

  “Oh boy,” Avery bubbled. “This is the best news yet. And here you were worried about how you would ever manage to come up with any good content now that you and Ryker are together again.”

  That confused me. “Why would the two of you being together be a problem?” I asked.

  “Maybe we should all go have a seat in the other room,” Elise suggested. “This could take some time.”

  With that, the four of us each chipped in to carry the food and drinks into the next room, where we all found a comfortable seat. As we ate, Scarlet shared the story of her relationship with Ryker. It started sweet, but it turned sad. Luckily, it came back around in the end, and it was clear they were now in a good place. I didn’t know much about Ryker other than what everyone else told me, but it was clear he made Scarlet happy.

  For quite some time, all the women told me about how each of their relationships had gone for them from the start until now. I was astonished to learn that each of them experienced some challenging and heartbreaking situations before getting to where they were now.

  It made me think about my own turbulent beginning with Nash. We hadn’t experienced anything like Scarlet and Ryker did, but I had to admit I felt our start rivaled Avery and Knox with the early hostilities.

  Knowing now what they went through and how, when they finally did get together, it wasn’t all rainbows and sunshine until now, I began to fret. The truth was, each of these women had gone through some difficult times with their significant others after they’d gotten beyond their initial hurdles.

  Would that happen to Nash and me?

  And if it did, could we survive it?

  That thought made me shudder. It must have been visible because Kendall asked, “Why do you look so terrified right now?”

  I chewed on the inside corner of my mouth. These women had shared their stories freely and openly with me. I saw no reason not to do the same. In fact, I was convinced I desperately needed it.

  After my sister moved out to California, I struggled for a bit. We’d been together all our lives, and I hated knowing she was so far away. Though it had gotten marginally easier over the last several months to cope with, I still missed her. I knew I’d be helping myself tremendously by finding friends that I could depend on to be there for me.

  These women seemed like an excellent choice.

  So, I took in a deep breath and answered, “Everything seems like it happened so fast for all of you. While I really like what I have with Nash, I’m worried that if we experience something traumatic so soon, we won’t recover the way you all managed to.”

  “Just because we all went through something doesn’t mean you’ll experience the same thing on the same level,” Elise reasoned.

  “Yeah, don’t worry yourself over something that hasn’t happened yet,” Scarlet insisted.

  They had no idea. I hadn’t been thinking about the worst happening between Nash and me before now, but I also hadn’t heard all their stories before tonight. Now that I had, I couldn’t simply push those thoughts away. But if I was honest with myself, deep down, I knew what I was feeling didn’t have anything to do with Kendall, Avery, Scarlet, or Elise. I had a lifetime of memories reminding me that things weren’t wonderful all the time. I’d seen and experienced the worst of the worst.

  Despite that, I still managed to make something of myself. And I had found Nash. While our story was yet to be told, I did feel good about where it was going.

  “How are things between the two of you?” Avery asked, pulling me out of my thoughts.

  “They’re good,” I said. “Actually, they’re great. Right now, anyway. I do have to admit that it makes me a little nervous to hear everything all of you have been through. And Nash is just…. oh, never mind, it’s silly.”

  “It’s not,” Elise insisted. “Tell us. What is he?”

  There was a giddiness in her tone, and I could tell from the looks on their faces that Kendall, Avery, and Scarlet all felt the same. They wanted the scoop… no matter what it was.

  “Well, it’s just that Nash and I are very different from each other,” I started. “He goes with the flow, and I’m very much committed to having a routine and knowing what’s coming next.”

  “And you feel like this might be a bad thing?” Kendall asked.

  Nodding, I answered, “Maybe.”

  “I don’t think it’s a bad thing,” Scarlet said.

  “Yeah, I don’t either,” Elise agreed. “You know what they say. Opposites attract.”

  “I know. I get that. Totally,” I assured them. “The only thing is that as much as I like being in control of things and knowing what’s happening, I also feel like Nash gives up very quickly.”

  There was a collective silence that stretched for longer than I would have expected before Avery questioned me.

  “What do you mean by that?”

  The last thing I wanted to do was paint Nash in a bad light. He was an incredible guy, and he made me feel wonderful. It wasn’t until I heard their stories that I started to wonder.

  Shaking my head, I replied, “It’s mostly been little things, but whenever we have a difference of opinion, he doesn’t fight me on my wishes. If I say I’m going to do something, he lets it go even if he disagrees with it. I’m not saying I want him to try to control me because I could never deal with that, but I also don’t want someone who doesn’t care enough to put in the effort.”

  “What didn’t he challenge you on?” Elise pressed.

  “That’s just it,” I started. “It hasn’t ever really been anything super important. For example, like the other day, he was taking me out so he could surprise me for our date, and he told me I didn’t need to bring my purse. I wanted to bring it, and even though I knew I would bring it, I was still shocked that he didn’t put up a bigger fight about it. He seemed insistent about me not taking it at first, but when I didn’t back down, he just accepted it and moved on.”

  I experienced another round of silence. This one didn’t last as long as the previous one, but it was long enough for me to know that they all had significant thoughts running through their minds.

  “I wouldn’t worry about that,” Elise suggested.

  “Yeah, maybe there hasn’t been anything that has happened between the two of you that he feels is worth fighting about,” Kendall suggested. “I think if it’s like what you said about nothing being super important, he realizes that and just lets it go.”

  “I’m with Kendall on this one,” Scarlet declared. “Nash has always been super relaxed about everything. I don’t think it’s that he doesn’t care.”

  “Agreed,” Avery added. “I wholeheartedly believe that when it counts, Nash isn’t going to remain silent.”

  Hearing them all say that, I had to admit I felt like a fool. They were confident in Nash and the kind of guy he was. While I didn’t know them all that well yet, I didn’t think they were the kind of women who would say something to me if it wasn’t truly how they felt.

  Even without their input, I had to be honest with myself about Nash and give him the benefit of the doubt. There was nothing—other than this one little thing—that I didn’t like about him. And this wasn’t even necessarily something I didn’t like.
It was confusing for me because I wanted him to respect my position on things. My only problem was that I was worried he was on the complete opposite end of the spectrum. When I took the time to think about it, I was absolutely terrified that he might be laid-back about everything.

  Even holding on to me.

  And the worst part about all of it was how much I didn’t think I could deal with that. Because somehow, over the last several weeks, I went from simply feeling sexual tension and attraction to this man to feeling something much, much deeper. The way he made me laugh and forget about all of my worries… I couldn’t give that up. I didn’t want to give that up. He was sweet, caring, confident, and protective.

  No way.

  No way did I think I could live a fulfilled life without having what he brought to mine in it.

  I let out a deep sigh and murmured, “Maybe you’re right.”

  “Why do you seem so forlorn?” Scarlet asked gently.

  “I guess it just hit me how happy he makes me and how much it would hurt not to have him in my life anymore,” I confessed.

  “Don’t think about it coming to that,” Avery urged. “And every time you have that thought, remind yourself of what you’ve got to do to make sure you hold on to him. If you do that, I’m sure everything else will fall into place.”

  “I hope you’re right.”

  “I can’t wait to see how your story plays out so I can get started,” Scarlet bubbled. She was in a much happier mood, and I would have asked about it, but I was too curious about what she meant by her statement.

  Curiosity got the best of me, and I asked, “What does that mean?”

  “I didn’t get to see how Kendall and Avery each got together with Logan and Knox, but they told me their stories,” she started. “Elise has been my best friend for ten years now, so I was there during everything she went through with Kieran. And now I’m looking forward to seeing how it goes for you and Nash. It’s all been great material.”

  “Material?” I repeated.

  Scarlet let out a laugh and explained, “I promised Ryker I wouldn’t start another book until after the wedding, but that doesn’t mean I can’t brainstorm. I’ve been plotting a new series about a group of guys who work in a performance automotive shop.”

  My eyes widened. “You’re going to write stories about the guys?” I asked.

  She shook her head. “No. There won’t be any specifics to them or any of us, but I do get tons of inspiration from real-life events,” she attempted to reassure me.

  To be honest, it didn’t really bother me at all. If someone could find some good in the disaster that had been my life, I’d love to see it. Of course, I knew it wasn’t all bad. But on the surface, my past wasn’t a pretty picture.

  “Well, hopefully, I don’t hold it up for you,” I told her. “Though I guess with your wedding approaching, you’ll be busy for a little while anyway, right?”

  Nodding with the most beautiful smile on her face, she confirmed, “Yes. I can’t wait.”

  “Did you always want a spring wedding?” I asked her. I wanted to change the subject to something much lighter. We’d had the time to discuss the ups and downs of the relationships we were in, but now it was time to focus on the good.

  “It’s our birthday,” she declared.

  “What?”

  “Isn’t it the cutest thing?” Avery asked. “I lost my mind when she told me.”

  Was she saying what I thought?

  “I’m sorry… did you… are you saying that you and Ryker have the same birthday?” I stammered.

  Avery grinned at me. My eyes slid to the side and met Kendall’s. She, too, was grinning. When I looked at Elise, she said, “I know. It’s sickeningly sweet, isn’t it? If that’s not an indication they’re meant for each other, I don’t know what is.”

  The reality of what I’d just heard penetrated, and I realized how much I still had left to learn about Nash. Instead of focusing on what worried me about where we could end up, I should have been doing what he did from the start when he refused to sleep with me. I should have been putting all of my energy into learning everything I could about him and allowing him to learn everything he could about me. Then, if and when we ended up going through any trying times, we’d be so hooked on one another, we’d have no choice but to work it out.

  Yes.

  I was a woman on a mission now.

  Make Nash mine. More than he already was.

  And I was going to start tonight when I went to his place for the first time. I couldn’t wait.

  On that thought, I returned my attention to the group and got lost in the conversation. I had to admit it was nice to have this. Without having Kaia around all the time any longer, I’d struggled to find a place where I felt comfortable. I hadn’t been expecting I’d find a single friend that could even come close to filling the void that was left when my sister moved. Deep down, I knew that nobody could ever take her place. But if I was going to get these four spectacular ladies, I wasn’t going to pass them up, and I certainly wasn’t going to complain.

  When the evening wound down, and we’d decided to call it a night, I was compelled to let them know what the night meant to me.

  “Thanks again for inviting me over,” I began. “I really appreciate the four of you making an effort to make me feel part of the group.”

  “Are you kidding?” Kendall asked, an edge of disbelief in her tone.

  I shook my head.

  “Parker, I couldn’t wait for Nash to find someone,” Elise interjected. “I wanted to be able to make someone feel the way these girls made me feel. Even though Scarlet and I already knew each other, there was definitely a bit of anxiety joining a new group. I hope you don’t feel any of that.”

  “I’ll admit that it’s been hard for me to cope with my sister moving to California,” I started. “But tonight has made that distance just a little bit easier. It really means a lot to me. Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome,” Avery replied. “And no matter where you and Nash end up, you’ll always have us.”

  “That’s a promise,” Kendall said. “Don’t ever doubt it.”

  How did I get so lucky? Once again, I knew it was possible they could have been feeding me a bunch of lies just to make me feel good, but I didn’t see what they stood to gain in doing something like that.

  “I’m looking forward to doing this again,” I told them.

  “Scarlet’s going to have a bachelorette party coming up soon, so we’ll work out the details and let you know,” Elise shared. “You have to come with us.”

  “I’d love to,” I replied.

  “Perfect.”

  At that, we all walked toward the door to leave.

  Ten minutes later—following a round of hugs, goodbyes, and promises to stay in touch—I was in my car on my way to see Nash. And I couldn’t remember ever feeling so excited about anything in my life.

  I only wished I had paid a bit more attention to that nagging voice I’d pushed to the back of my head because I hadn’t realized this night was going to be the beginning of the end of us.

  The moment the door opened, I dropped my bag and flung myself into Nash’s arms. He caught me around the waist, held me close, and shut the door behind me as he stepped back into his house.

  Keeping a tight hold on me long after the door closed, Nash buried his face in my neck and inhaled.

  “I’ve missed you,” he said, his voice muffled.

  My heart exploded in my chest.

  “I missed you, too,” I returned.

  Nash’s lips touched the skin at the side of my neck and worked their way up to my jaw. He peppered kisses along my jaw as he moved toward my lips. Then he claimed my mouth with a delicious kiss.

  I could have been easily satisfied with Nash’s kisses, but he was not one to do just the bare minimum when it came to stuff like this. It didn’t take long before his hands were roaming over my body, one going down to my ass while the other came to my hip, slid up m
y side, and landed at my breast. He caressed and massaged me there as his hand on my ass squeezed. Through it all, his lips and his tongue did not miss a beat.

  We took some time to get reacquainted with one another just inside his front door, but we eventually managed to separate ourselves.

  Nash’s hand drifted up over my shoulder and into my hair as his eyes searched my face. He smiled at me and asked, “Did you have any trouble finding the place?”

  Shaking my head, I answered, “Nope. I was worried I would get lost because it’s so late and it’s dark out, but I didn’t have any issues.”

  “Good.”

  “You weren’t sleeping, were you?” I questioned him.

  Tipping his head to the side, Nash gave me a questioning look. “You weren’t here,” he started. “I told you I was going to wait until you get here.”

  Every piece of my heart that had exploded when he told me he missed me was now melting in my chest. These were the things that made me feel so good about Nash. Those thoughts I’d had while I was at Elise’s with the rest of the girls didn’t make any sense now, not when he said things like this to me.

  “Thanks for waiting up for me and for inviting me over,” I told him.

  “Would you like to get the grand tour?” he asked.

  “I’d love to,” I answered.

  As I started to reach for my bag, Nash urged, “Leave it there for now. I’ll come back down and get it for you later.”

  With that, Nash guided me through his house and gave me a tour. As we walked through the first floor, he was very enthusiastic about showing me all the things he had done to renovate each room. He also showed me the rooms that he hadn’t yet tackled and didn’t fail to share what his plans were for those rooms.

  “I’m so impressed,” I told him after he’d shown me the entire first floor of the house, and we started climbing the stairs. “Obviously, I don’t know what the place looked like before you made the renovations, but I love what you’ve done in the rooms that have been completed. Your kitchen is gorgeous.”

  “Thanks, sunshine,” he replied. “I’m glad you like it.”