Love Me

by Diamond Johnson

  I ended up staying up with her until almost eight in the morning, and by the time she dozed off, I had to question myself on who talked more shit... me or her. I never had a female best friend, but when I was around her, I felt like that’s what she was. We pretty much disagreed on a lot of shit, and when we did, she would talk her shit, and I would talk mine, but the conversation still flowed. I knew I was fuckin’ with this girl in some way because when I saw that she’d dozed off, I was pissed.

  As men, I feel like when it comes to sex, we’re desperate for that nut. Whether we nut from head or from fuckin’, we’re desperate for those little three to five seconds that we get when that nut creeps up on us. That’s how I felt tonight. I was desperate to keep up the conversation, so when she fell asleep, I felt like she gave a nigga the best ride of my life, and right when I was getting ready to bust, she stopped. It may sound crazy, but that’s how I felt.

  I didn’t even fall asleep with her. I just pulled the covers back on the side of the bed where I would usually sleep, and I placed her there. While she slept, I just sat there, knowing that it would only be a matter of time before my kids called me, wanting to know when I was coming to pick them up.

  Just as I was getting ready to stand up from the bed, the bedroom door opened. My grandmother stood at the door with her robe on that she’d been wearing since I was a little boy, and she smirked once she saw Takari and me in the bed together. She was a woman, so I was pretty sure that by this point, she’d managed to come up with all sorts of stories on what she thought happened between Takari and me last night when she didn’t have the slightest clue.

  Takari’s head was damn near laying on my chest, and she was knocked out, so she didn’t even realize that the bedroom door had opened. I signaled to my grandma, basically telling her to get her ass out because I could only imagine how uncomfortable Takari would have been had she woke up and saw my grandma standing there. She finally closed the door behind her, and I laughed to myself. Had this been years ago when I was in high school, she would have beat me and whoever I had lying up in her bed at her house. Boy, has the times changed.

  11

  Jerrod Evans

  I woke up the next morning to a bad ass migraine. My head was thumping something serious, and just when I was about to question why the hell my head was hurting the way it was, I remembered last night’s events at the birthday dinner that I attended. I had participated in throwing so many shots back to back, and now my head was paying me back for it. I rarely drank. Every now and then, I’d have a Corona or something like that, but I never drank to the point where I got myself sloppy drunk.

  I had one experience during my junior year in college when I’d gotten sloppy drunk with a few of my roommates. I remembered the after effects of not knowing what took place the previous night mixed with the constant throwing up every five minutes, so I made a vow to myself that I would always keep my alcohol intake under control, but it was clear that I’d forgotten about all those vows last night.

  Last night when I was out with my friends from work, I just felt like I was free of it all. Free from home, my wife, my kids, and I took advantage of it. After the first three shots of Patron were in my system, I started liking what it was doing to my body. Nothing mattered. I wasn’t uptight like I always was. I was no longer thinking about the job and how I wanted to meet a certain number this month in sales. None of that shit mattered, and the more shots I took, the less important the things of life started to become to me, and I loved that feeling.

  I laid under the covers for about ten minutes, wondering why the hell the house was so damn quiet. That’s when last night events after I got home came into my mind, which didn’t do anything but further hurt my head even more. I wouldn’t blame what I did to my wife fully on the alcohol, but it did play a huge role. Without the alcohol in my system, yes, I probably still would have thrown her ass outside naked, but I don’t know if I would have gone so far as to throw the trash on her too. I’ll admit, that I was wrong as hell for doing that, so it was only right that I apologized for it.

  I wasn’t trying to hurt her last night with my actions. If anything, I was just trying to teach her a lesson, and really prove to her how she would pretty much lose it all if she left me. That’s all it was supposed to be. I lay there for another fifteen minutes, just thinking of the best apology that I could give say to my wife, and then I finally got my ass up out of bed. I damn near had to drag myself to the bathroom to piss.

  Once I finished that, I went over to the sink to brush my teeth. I jumped when I saw the person looking back at me in the mirror. I didn’t look like myself. I had more gray hairs on my head, so you no longer had to play hide and seek with them, I was slimmer, there were bags under my eyes, and my eyes were bloodshot red. I looked pitiful, and I knew that a lot of this had to do with the fact that I was stressing in this damn marriage.

  After what happened last night, I wanted to make this shit work with Shrimp. I think that was the lowest that she and I had ever been, and I wasn’t trying to go down that road again. Maybe a new car could make up for my actions last night. I’ll just throw 100 g’s in her account and call it a day. See, the thing is, I was just hoping that whatever I had to do to get her back was enough. I remember about 50% of the things that transpired between us last night. I can’t remember everything that I said to her out of anger, so I didn’t know if my efforts to win her back would even work.

  After I finished handling my hygiene in the bathroom, I walked out of the room. To my surprise, Takari wasn’t even in the guest bedroom. I knew for a fact I heard her come back inside the house early this morning when I’d unlocked the door for her. I quickly jogged down the stairs, and that’s when I saw that one of her cars were gone. I was just about to head back up the stairs to call her, just to see where she was, but I saw something shining in the kitchen. I walked over, and I saw that this woman had the audacity to take off her wedding ring and leave it there. What the fuck was she trying to prove? Scratch that, what the fuck was she trying to say?

  One would think that last night would be all the clear indication she needed that divorcing me was not the route that she should aspire to take! She obviously didn’t love our kids the way she claimed to because I was going to make sure that was the very first thing on my fuckin’ list that I took from her black, ungrateful ass! I had spent fuckin’ millions on this woman over the years, yet we have one bad night, and she’s so quick to take off a ring that cost more than her whole fuckin’ life! The nerve of that bitch!

  I remember a time when my dad was alive, and he would get so upset with my mother, and I could hear him either down in his office or somewhere in his man cave, just calling my mother everything but a child of God. As a little boy, I remember questioning myself on how he could say those things about my mother, but the older I got, the more it made sense. Not only that, but the older I got, the more I realized how much I reminded myself of my father. To him, money and power were everything. If my mom were to complain about a headache, he would quickly remind her that she lived in a million dollar home, with millions in her account, and that she didn’t have time to be complaining about a headache. Money was everything with him, and I could slowly feel myself turning into that person.

  With the ring still in my hand, I heard the doorbell ring. I quickly dropped the ring in one of the drawers in the kitchen and headed for the door. I hadn’t even showered yet or anything, so there I was, walking to the door with nothing on aside from the pajama bottoms that I went to sleep in last night. I looked out the window that was next to the front door, and my eyebrows rose in suspicion once I saw who was at the door.

  “How the hell did she even find out where I stay?” I mumbled to myself as I continued to stare at the figure who was standing at the door.

  It was Valentina, my mom’s neighbor. This time, she wasn’t dressed as if she just finished working out. Instead, she was dressed casually in a pair of denim jeans that looked as if they were glued to he
r body along with a pink V-neck top. I wasn’t sure if she had any plans after she left my mom that day, but from the way she had her big, bouncy curls in her hair along with the six-inch pumps on her feet, it made me think that maybe she had somewhere special to be after this.

  Seeing her standing on the opposite side of my front door had me realizing that God had to have been real. Any other Sunday, my wife and my kids would have been home, and had Takari been there while another attractive woman was knocking on our door this early in the morning, I just knew that it wouldn’t have ended well. As much as I felt like the better option was for me to leave her ass standing outside, I chose to open the door because, at the end of the day, something could have been wrong with my mother.

  “Hey, everything alright?” was the first thing that I asked her once the front door opened.

  “Trust me, this is weird as hell for me too. I was actually on my way out to have an early breakfast, and then I planned to meet a couple of my girlfriends at the mall, so we could do some weekend shopping. You know your mom left on a trip to Spain a couple of days ago, and she called me this morning saying that she had been trying to get in contact with you since last night, but you weren’t answering. She said something about not wanting to call your brothers since they lived far away, and it really wasn’t much that they could do, so she called me. She texted me your address and told me to drop by, just to make sure that everything was okay with you. You’re alive. You look a little hung over, but the important thing is that you’re alive. I’ll go ahead and let her know that,” she said.

  She started to turn around like she was going to make her way back to her Mercedes, but I quickly pulled her arm to stop her. I had to admit that my mother was messy as fuck. She could have easily called my wife and found out from her if I was okay or not, but she thought that it was a better idea to send this fine, single ass woman to my crib to check up on me. That was bullshit, and she knew it. She wanted to hook Valentina and me up, and she was being sly about it.

  I was a man. A man with two eyes that worked perfectly fine, so I couldn’t help but be attracted to Valentina. She was easily a ten in my book, plus she smelled good. I’m not sure if me lusting over her right now had anything to do with Takari taking off her ring and leaving it home, but I found myself looking at Valentina right now with heart eyes.

  “You’re neighbors with my mom. Therefore I know this drive wasn’t just down the street. It took you thirty minutes at the least to get to me. You said that you were on your way to breakfast, right? Save your money. I’ve been told that I make a mean ass omelet, so let me do that for you. You shouldn’t have had to make this long ass drive on a Sunday morning on my mother’s behalf. Let this just be my way of making it up to you,” I said, looking down at her as I spoke.

  She wasn’t short like my wife, but she was shorter than me, even in her heels, so of course, I had to look down at her. I could feel the wheels in her head spinning as she thought on whether or not she should come inside with me. I was pretty sure that my bare chest and the six-pack that I was working with, along with my penetrating hazel eyes were going to be the determining factor, on why she decided to come inside.

  “I’ll come inside, but only for breakfast,” she let me know, and I nodded.

  I went back for the front door, opening it wide, and I stood aside, giving her more than enough room to walk in. I led the way to the kitchen, and once the two of us were in there, I could see her scanning the place, more than likely saying to herself how much of a beautiful home this was. Although I was the one who paid for this home, it was my wife who did all of the furnishing of each room. I’ll admit that interior decorating was something that she was definitely good at.

  After she finished taking a look around the kitchen, Valentina took a seat on one of the barstools that faced the island while I went into the kitchen cabinets to get the things that I would need for breakfast. Every few seconds, I would steal a look at Valentina, and right now, she was staring at the pictures that were in the dining room hanging on the walls. There were school pictures of my kids, family pictures with the five of us, and a few of Takari’s and my wedding photos.

  “Will your wife be okay with you having another woman in your home? I give credit where credit’s due, so I have to admit that she’s beautiful. Hell, your entire family is beautiful. Why are you even entertaining me? I’d die to be in your wife’s shoes. Not to say that I want you or anything like that, but I want the whole family thing. I want to be happily married with kids, and you have that. Why bring me into the home that you share with your wife and kids?” she asked me, cocking her head to the side.

  I turned around from the stove and posted up with my back on the counter as I looked over at her. I wanted to choose my words wisely. I could use the company, and I didn’t want to say the wrong thing, possibly piss her off, and she hauls ass to the door. So, I thought over the words that I would say before I actually said them.

  “When you agreed to come into my house, you knew that I was married with kids already, right? I’m pretty sure my mom told you that. Her ass can’t hold water,” I said, and she nodded her head, confirming that she did know. “So, what, you got mixed feelings when you saw a few pictures of us smiling, and we looked as if we were happy? What makes a difference if I’m happily married or not? Either way, I’m a married man. To be perfectly honest with you, Valentina, that picture that you see right there with all five of us, that was taken three years ago and was the last family photo that all of us took together.

  “My father taught me at a young age to never let outsiders in on the things that take place inside my home, but I feel like your inquisitive mind would like to know. Shit between my wife and I hasn’t been good in years. No, my wife wouldn’t be okay with me bringing another woman into our home, but she does a lot of shit that I don’t like, so I’ll just call it even,” I said and shrugged like the shit that I was doing was no big deal.

  “I never understood that. If two people are in a marriage and they are no longer happy, then why stay? I’m only asking that because I watched that unfold with my mother and my father for years. By the time I was like ten, I could see that my parents were just together because of me. They were no longer sleeping in the same bedroom, I never saw them show each other any affection, yet they kept trying to make it work. They did eventually divorce, though, but it wasn’t until I turned sixteen. Is that how it is with you and your wife? Do you feel like you’re only staying with her because of the three children that you all share?” she asked me.

  That was a deep question. I didn’t even know if I ever thought about it like that. It took me a few minutes, but I did finally answer her question.

  “I don’t think I stick it out for the sake of my kids because I know that in the end, whether I’m with my wife or not, my kids will always be taken care of. It’s more of a comfort thing with Takari. I’m comfortable with her. I always had money when she and I were together because of my father, but I didn’t always have this much money, you know? If we divorce today, I feel like I’m putting myself out there. How can I trust that a woman is with me just to be with me? I’m worth millions, and if a woman knows that, then, of course, she’s going to do everything in her power to get a chance with me. A woman can play that role so well that I won’t know if their feelings are pure, or they’re just acting. I didn’t have to worry about shit like that when it came to my wife because we were so young. Shit is different now,” I said, and she nodded her head in understanding.

  “What if you meet a woman who has her own money? Me, for example. I’m a single woman, a first-time homeowner, I have a very successful career, so I couldn’t care less about what’s in another man’s pockets. That’s just a bonus to me when you think about it. When my parents started going through problems in their marriage, my mom taught me the importance of independence. You see, not only did my mom not leave my dad because she wanted to work it out for the sake of me, but also because financially, she depended on h
im. I know what it feels like for a man to have power over you because they have money, and I don’t want that,” she let me know.

  This conversation had gotten so damn deep that I forgot I had food on the stove. I turned my back on her so I could finish with the omelet, and seconds later, I heard her push the barstool back. I paid it no mind because I figured that she was getting ready to be nosey again and stare at more pictures of me and my family. That didn’t come, though.

  Suddenly, I felt her heat. Her body was so close to mine that I could feel her body heat. Because I wasn’t wearing a shirt, I could feel her breast pushing up against my back. I hadn’t gotten this sort of attention from a woman in so long, that I didn’t stop her. I should have stopped her, but I didn’t. Her long nails snaked around me, and they remained on the waistband of the pajamas that I was wearing. Her ability to take over and not be shy turned me on. My dick was poking through the fabric of the pajamas because of her touches.

  “I don’t usually go after married men, I promise you I don’t. My parents finally split because of the woman that my father was having an affair with. Because of that situation, I know the damage that an affair can do to a family, but something tells me that your marriage is already done. I was attracted to you from the first time your mom invited me over to her house, and I saw a picture of you in her living room. Once she told me that you were married, and you had three children, all attraction that I had for you went out the window. Then, I saw you in person, and my pussy has been thumping for you ever since. I told myself that I would still leave you alone and not pursue you, then ten minutes ago, a conversation happened between us about your wife. You don’t want your wife, do you Jerrod?” she asked me, and just like that, her hands went into my pants, and she grabbed my hard dick.