A Second Chance Summer

by Katharine E Smith

  “Julie,” I sigh, “I don’t think you’re an idiot. Well, actually, maybe I do. A bit. Last night was meant to be your chance to clear everything up.”

  “I know,” I can see she’s trying to hid her annoyance and I must admit, I know I sound quite sanctimonious. I also know I am extra annoyed at her because I’m feeling sore from Sam’s dishonesty and I am probably taking that out on her.

  “You weren’t there, though,” she says. “It was such a great evening and I’d thought it was going to be awful. We talked about loads of stuff, and I was so relieved by all those things Luke said. When I was about to leave, he kissed me, and then one thing led to another, and it was… wonderful. I wish I could be with him; but then that would mean no Gabe. I wish I could have them both.”

  “Well you definitely can’t do that,” I snap, then apologise. “I’m sorry. You’re right; I wasn’t there. But don’t you think you’re being unfair to Gabe as well, now? He’s at that job interview today, trying to make a future for you both. How would he feel if he knew where you were last night? Don’t you think you should be honest with him… with them both?”

  “Who are you to talk about being honest?” Julie snaps at me. “Gabe told me he’d gone to see you the night before we came down here. You never mentioned that, did you? I wonder why not.”

  “What… no, yes, he did. And no I didn’t mention it to you. I was trying to protect you.”

  “Protect me?” she snorts. “Are you sure you weren’t just trying to get one up on me?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Oh, you and Gabe always got on well, didn’t you? Always mucking about together and laughing at my expense.”

  “I…” I am genuinely shocked. I had no idea Julie felt like that. Yes, I do get on well with Gabe and maybe there were times we had made fun of Julie, but never out of spite. And I’m pretty sure that anything like that was equal; we’d all take the piss out of each other as good friends do. I don’t know what to say.

  “Sorry,” she sighs, “that was a stupid thing to say. I wish you’d told me he’d been to see you, though. It felt weird that you and he had a secret.”

  “It really, really wasn’t like that, Julie. I felt sorry for him, but I knew you’d made up your mind about coming down here and I thought telling you that he’d been to see me would just make you feel bad. Listen, Mum and Dad are here. Do you want to come and say hello?”

  “I can’t, at the moment. I just need to clear my head a bit. Will you say hi for me, and tell them I’ll see them later?”

  “Sure,” I say, relieved, as there’s no way I could hide the tension between me and Julie at the moment. And I wouldn’t mind a break from her, to be honest. She needs to sort herself out. I can’t believe she is being so self-centred.

  I take a deep breath and head outside, to receive more hugs and exclamations from my parents.

  “I’m sure she’s grown!” says Dad.

  “I’m nearly twenty-nine, Dad,” I say, “so I bloody hope not!”

  “You do look brown, though, Alice,” says Mum. “You look really well.”

  “Thank you!” I say. “It’s so good to see you. Do you fancy coming to the flat for a few minutes while I get changed, or is it easier to meet you in town somewhere?”

  “Oh, we definitely want to see your flat, and meet David!” says Mum. “Will Martin be there?”

  “No, not today. In fact, David will be out at work. But you’ll meet him tomorrow; we’ve been invited to a meal to celebrate their engagement. Right here.”

  “Great,” says Dad, “is Julie coming?”

  “Yes, she’ll be here,” I say. “Come on, let’s go.”

  I shepherd Mum and Dad off the terrace and we head away together into a day of Cornish sunshine. I show them around the town; we walk the length of the three beaches, and up onto the coastal path. I try not to think about the last time I was up here.

  “What was that bird?” Dad asks.

  “I don’t know, I didn’t see it.”

  “It was a beauty, it had a little yellow head and body, with brown on its wings.”

  “Oh, that sounds like a yellowhammer,” I say airily.

  I only know that because of Sam. Dad is impressed, though. “I can see it suits you, being here. You always used to love those holidays down here, when you were a kid. Do you remember?”

  “I do,” I say, and tell them about my trip yesterday afternoon.

  After our walk, we head into town and stop at the Mainbrace as Dad wants a pint. Mum and I both drink bitter shandy. We sit at a table outside and Dad is impressed again when occasionally somebody says hello to me. A couple of the guys I met when I went out with Casey; and Marvin, who supplies the kippers to the Sail Loft. “Proper local, aren’t you?”

  “Hardly!” I say, but I feel proud all of a sudden. After all, I haven’t really lived here long, but I do feel, if not a local, not a total tourist, either.

  We stay at the Mainbrace for a couple of drinks and then head to a tapas bar. The afternoon seeps into the evening and before I know it we’re drinking red wine at an outside table, surrounded by other chattering families, the night sky dark above our heads. I have barely given Sam a thought, I realise, as we walk back to David’s house.

  I say bye to Mum and Dad on the doorstep, checking they know their way back to the Sail Loft.

  “We can always ask a passing pirate,” Dad says, in a poor imitation of the South West accent. I smile, and kiss him. Some time with my parents was just what I needed.

  I unlock the heavy door and tiptoe into the house. Downstairs is in darkness but I can see a crack of light squeezing through the bathroom door, and I can hear the muffled sound of David’s radio amidst some splashing. I creep past and go up to the flat, to find Julie’s door closed. I knock softly on it but there is no reply. I use the bathroom, undress, and fall into bed. Then I think of Sam and I scramble out of bed, digging my phone out of my bag to check for messages. There is nothing.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  On Wednesday, Julie and I are barely talking to each other but I need to make that right before the evening meal, if possible. If I get Mum and Dad involved, that could help. They love Julie and she loves them; as she and I have been best friends since primary school, we know each other’s parents really well and are more like family to each other than friends. Which is why I know we’ll get through this rocky period, and why I can be so honest with her. And why she can also be honest with me. I need to give some thought towards why she felt like that about me and Gabe – or was she just lashing out?

  I also have to be honest with myself about how much of the anger I’m feeling is coming from my own situation rather than a reaction to Julie’s behaviour.

  It’s funny seeing Mum and Dad at breakfast. Dad makes lots of jokes about me getting my comeuppance after treating their house like a hotel, and him as a taxi driver, Mum as a waitress, etc. Mum and I look at each other and roll our eyes.

  I suggest that as they missed her yesterday, they might like to go in and see Julie after she’s finished service.

  “Great idea, we’ve missed our second daughter, too,” Dad says.

  I decide not to warn Julie but to let them take her by surprise. She will have to be nice to them, and pretend everything is OK, unless she wants to tell them what she’s been up to, and I don’t suppose she wants to do that.

  I hear them go in, Dad being his usual over-the-top self. My dad is great; for all the eye-rolling that Mum and I do, we wouldn’t have him any other way. He is cheerful, and silly, and tries to make sure that life is fun. He’s always been like that. The only times I’ve seen him down are when his mum died, and when I was going through all that stuff with Geoff. I hated seeing Dad sad. It felt wrong.

  I can hear Julie returning my parents’ exclamations and it makes me smile despite myself. And then, before I know it, they are ushering Julie out of the kitchen, and telling me we are all going for lunch. I look at Julie and she looks
at me. And we start laughing.

  “What’s so funny?” Dad asks. “You girls, I don’t know! Always giggling.”

  And just like that, the tension has gone. Trust my parents to sort everything out.

  We head off to David’s house, all talking and laughing together. As we hurriedly change, Julie and I shout apologies to each other.

  “I shouldn’t be so judgemental,” I say to her. “I’m sorry.”

  “No, I shouldn’t behave like such an idiot. I’m stupid, and I know it puts you in an awkward situation, with Gabe, and with Luke.”

  “Well I don’t suppose I’ll be seeing much more of Luke,” I say. “Are you going to tell Gabe about him?”

  “I think I might have to,” Julie is downcast for a second, then looks at me. “What do you think?”

  “I think it’s going to be a very hard thing to do,” I say, “but I think you might have to. Otherwise you’ve got that hanging over you for the rest of your lives together.”

  “Shit, I know you’re right. Why are you always right?”

  I laugh. “I really wish I was.” I realise that with everything that’s been going on in her life, I haven’t even told her about Sam, and Sophie and Casey. I’ll save that for later.

  We have lunch in the sun on the terrace of the Harbour Hotel, with a glass of prosecco. It puts us all in great spirits and in the afternoon Dad heads back to the Sail Loft for a snooze while Mum, Julie and I go to look for an engagement present for Martin and David. We end up all buying new clothes, for the party that evening, and being unable to decide on anything suitable for a present. I don’t really know Martin’s taste, although I feel like I know David’s fairly well. It’s nearly shop-closing time when Julie hits on an idea. We are on Fore Street, just moments from the harbour.

  “Let’s get them a tourist day!”

  “A what?” I ask.

  “A day to spend as tourists. I mean, they both live here, they probably don’t do any of the things like boat trips or ghost walks. Let’s ask David and Martin tonight to let us know a day when they’re free and then book them a whole day’s worth of activities! Starting with a dolphin-spotting trip in the morning; lunch at the Harbour Hotel, maybe surfing lessons, or paddle boarding, in the afternoon, fish and chips on the harbour wall, and the ghost walk in the evening.”

  “That is a great idea, Julie!” Mum says. “Maybe Phil and I should try out a few of those things tomorrow, too, then we can book them if we can get a date sorted tonight. I might give the paddle boarding a miss, though.”

  Julie suggests we stop for a little drink to toast her genius, and we bustle into the Mainbrace for a gin and tonic before going our separate ways to get ready for the evening.

  I have a shower and put on my new Seasalt dress. It’s light blue and makes my tan look even darker. I peer at the peeling skin and freckles on my shoulders, then pin my hair up. I can’t help but wish that Sam was coming with me tonight. I drift into a daydream, that it’s our engagement party, but I quickly make myself snap out of it. I’m being pathetic.

  Walking with Julie to the Sail Loft, I tell her about what happened.

  “Oh my god, I’m so sorry I never even asked, I just assumed that you two were on the go-slow,” she said. “And I’ve been totally wrapped up in myself, to be honest. Come to think of it, Sam tried to call Luke the other night – more than once – but Luke let it go to voicemail.”

  I wonder what Sam ended up doing on Sunday evening, instead of going out with me. Did he look after Sophie while Casey went for a night out with somebody else? I don’t imagine so as she’s told me herself she doesn’t really have any friends. I feel suddenly sorry for her again. That thing she told me about drinking; it can’t be good to drink that much, that often, all alone. I hope that things improve for her soon. Then it hits me that maybe Sam stayed with her and Sophie, maybe Casey and he got drunk together, for old time’s sake… I turn the thought away. It’s not a healthy way to be thinking.

  As we reach the Sail Loft, I see some of the guests I served at breakfast this morning; a large, cheerful lady and her equally large, bearded husband, heading merrily down the steps.

  “Come to join the party, girls?” she asks, and he pretend wolf-whistles at us.

  His wife nudges him. “Like they’d be interested in you, you old goat!”

  They laugh and head off in the direction of town, hand-in-hand.

  Inside, there is laughter coming from the dining room. Julie and I go in, to be met by an exuberant Bea; more lively and colourful than I have ever seen her, in a dashing red dress, and a matching lipstick. “There you are, you two!” she exclaims. “Go and get yourselves a glass of bubbly!”

  I see Mum and Dad chatting to Martin and David. They all smile at us and we greet Martin and David with kisses of congratulations.

  “Have you seen Jonathan?” David nudges me. “Go and have a look in the kitchen!”

  “Why?” I ask, smiling.

  “He is gorgeous! Isn’t he, Martin?”

  “Who? Mr Chef? Oh, yeah. Go on, girls, go and sneak a look!”

  “No!” I say.

  Julie laughs. “Well, I will. I mean, it’s my kitchen, isn’t it? I’d better make sure he’s treating it right.”

  Reluctantly, I follow her. A tall, slim man with short dark hair and chef’s whites has his back to us, busily preparing a salad. Julie coughs and he turns around. David and Martin are right; he is gorgeous. But he’s got to be younger than me, maybe no more than twenty-three.

  “Can I help you?” he asks. His face is tanned and his eyes are a deep, dark brown.

  “I just wanted to introduce myself,” Julie says grandly; “I’m the breakfast chef.”

  “Oh, yes… Julie, right? Bea said you’d be here. You’re leaving next week?”

  “That’s right.”

  “I’m sorry to hear it,” Jonathan smiles at Julie and I see her melt.

  “And I’m Alice,” I say.

  “Oh yeah… David told me about you. You’re a waitress and a receptionist?” He grins.

  “Yes.” I see nothing funny in that.

  “Well, I’m looking forward to working with you,” he says. “I would shake hands, but…” He raises his gloved hands, which have tomato seeds stuck to them.

  “That’s fine, thank you.” I smile now. “We’ll see you in a bit.”

  I drag Julie out of the kitchen. “Two men’s quite enough for you,” I say.

  She laughs. “Well at least you’ve got something to keep you occupied after I go!”

  “Ha,” I say, “have you seen how young he is?”

  “You’re hardly middle-aged yourself, Alice.”

  The meal is delicious. As well as being drop-dead gorgeous, Jonathan is clearly a very talented chef. There is crabmeat salad for starters, and an avocado version for me and the other two vegetarians (friends of Martin’s); for main course we have roasted aubergines or lamb with cous cous, Moroccan style vegetables and deep fried potatoes (yes, that’s chips to most people); dessert is a light chocolate mousse. Bea keeps the wine flowing and Martin and David keep us all entertained with far-fetched stories about people they have worked with, cases David has had to fight at work, and the most extravagant weddings they have gone to.

  When it is time for coffee, Bea stands up and makes a toast: “I just can’t say how proud and delighted I am that my little brother is getting married. If our parents were here today, they’d be just the same – once they’d got over the shock that their son was gay!” There is general laughter here. David has told me that he wishes he’d told his parents the truth but had been building up to it and then his mum had got ill, and he’d never found the right time, although he thinks his mum knew, really. His dad died within a year after his mum. “I couldn’t hope for a better husband for David; a better brother-in-law for me, than Martin.” Bea continues, raising her glass. “To David and Martin.”

  “To David and Martin,” we all echo.

  The sky, which had been
clear just a short time earlier, has become moody; thick, grey clouds have moved in and taken over. Somewhere behind them, the sun is sliding down towards the horizon; every now and then it finds a chink in the grey armour and shoots a ray of gold through, making the sea twinkle briefly, but the clouds close ranks once more. I marvel at the difference this change makes to the view of the town; the rooftops seem to have changed colour, as the sunlight which was earlier making their orange lichen glow has disappeared. The clouds hang heavy and brooding overhead and I know it is just a matter of time until the rain comes. I feel quite heady – no doubt from the earlier gin and tonic, then the champagne, then the wine we’ve had with dinner. When it’s polite to do so, I head outside to the terrace, to get some fresh air. My legs are definitely a bit wobbly. I stand quietly for a while, looking out to sea.

  I’m surprised when I find that both Bea and David have come out to join me. Bea touches my arm, making me jump.

  “Alice, have you got a moment? There’s something we want to talk to you about.”

  My face must have fallen because they both laugh.

  “Nothing bad,” says David. “Let’s sit down.”

  We all take a seat at one of the tables.

  “Well, where to start, really?” David asks Bea.

  “I think it’s best if I go first,” she says. “OK, you know I’ve been running this place for over twelve years? And how I always whinge that I never get a break?”

  “Yes,” I say hesitantly.

  “Well - between the three of us - I’m going to go away, for a few months. I’ve actually… I’ve met a man. But he’s American. He lives in America. And I’m going to go out and see him and hopefully… stay for a while.”

  “Wow, Bea!” I exclaim. “That’s really exciting!”

  “It is, isn’t it?” she says. “But there’s more to this. Now, I really don’t want to give up the Sail Loft, because I’ve worked so flaming hard for it, and I don’t know how it’s going to work out with Bob. Yes, he’s called Bob… don’t laugh. So I wondered whether there is any chance you’d consider staying on, over the winter, maybe into next spring, and managing the place?”