True North
Page 12
“I was supposed to be helping you. Now I have to leave you to pack on your own.”
“I like your kind of help. Now, go open the bar, and I’ll be over in a bit. Can you reserve my table? I have work to do.”
“Don’t take too long, or I’ll have to come looking for you.”
“Go away, or I’ll never get there.” I push him out the door and shut it behind him.
I toss my clothes in my bag and pack up my toiletries. I look around and see my little pile of fast food by the microwave. Two cans of Beanie Weenies and a can of beef stew remain. I consider throwing it in my bag but hear Zane’s voice telling me not to eat that canned crap and decide to leave it behind.
I walk to the door for the last time. Looking over my shoulder, I say goodbye to my safe haven. I take the key to Trudy, who gives me a sly smile. She may be old, but she has eyes and ears.
“Take care of that sexy man. He needs a strong woman in his life. He’s a good man.”
“I will, Trudy. Come and see me across the street, okay?”
“Sure thing, darlin’.”
I give her a quick hug and hop into my pile of junk car to drive across the street. It’s a short move, but one not driven by fear. My personal compass drives me, and it’s pointing straight toward Zane. This could be another mistake, but deep in my core, it’s the only choice for me to make. I’m taking a leap of faith, and it’s resting on the shoulders of an amazing man with his adorable boy.
Chapter Twelve
It doesn’t take long to carry my stuff upstairs. I only have one suitcase and some personal hygiene items.
Ashley glares at me when I walk in without knocking. I’m sure she feels I’m a usurper.
“Zane tells me you and Claire are the best sitters available in Sugar Glen. He’s so lucky to have you.”
She looks up at me and smiles. It has to be tough on her to have things change so swiftly.
“I’ve been here for as long as Aaron has been living here. He’s like family to me.”
“Well, I’m not planning to replace you, if you think my presence is in any way threatening. Both of the men in this house have wrapped themselves around my heart, too.”
She seems to relax a bit. She surprises me with her next statement.
“Mr. Abbamonte seems happier since you’ve been around. He smiles more, and he’s not as grumpy.”
“Good, I’m glad I’m making a difference. Anyway, I’m heading to Walmart for food and stuff. Do you need anything?”
“Yes, some kind of junk food. This house never has any good snacks.” She rolls her eyes skyward. I totally understand. A girl needs junk to survive.
“I have a thing for Nutty Bars, so there will always be some on hand. Make sure to help yourself.”
I pick up my purse and take the front stairs down to tell Zane where I’m going.
“Do you need anything specific from the store? I’m heading out to do some shopping.”
“Yes, we probably need more condoms,” he whispers in my ear. “If we are going to use three or four a day, then I’m pretty certain we’ll run out soon.”
I pull him around the corner so I can speak to him privately.
“I don’t think I could sustain three or four times a day. I’m already walking a bit gingerly, and it’s my first day back in the saddle.”
“Are you cutting me off already? I didn’t think that happened until much further down the road in our relationship.”
“I’m not cutting you off, I may be limiting your rides. I have to be able to walk if I’m going to wait tables.”
“If waiting tables or having amazing sex with you are my two choices, then you’re fired. I’ll take option two.”
“You’re impossible.” I stretch to kiss him.
“I am, but you still love me.” He quirks his eyebrow up, as if he’s trying to challenge me to deny his statement.
“I would say I’m in deep at this point. Love and trust are open for grabs.” I wink at him so he doesn’t feel disheartened. He chuckles. “Now back to the list. Do we need diapers?”
“No, I picked up some the other day. I drive to West Cliff every other Friday to pick up bulk items. I was returning from there when I found you.”
“Really? So, will you go next Friday? Can I go?”
“Yes and yes. Tomorrow is my mom’s time with the baby. Will you come with us?”
“Of course, do you think I’m letting those women at the complex fawn all over my men? Fat chance.”
“You look sexy when you’re jealous. I like it.” His lips broaden slowly into a gorgeous, warm smile. I know what those lips can do, so I start to feel tingly all over. When this man smiles, he should come with a warning label: Back Away.
“Well, it’s not an emotion I’m used to. I don’t know how to wear it yet. As for the condoms, are you using them so you don’t get me pregnant, or are you concerned with getting something from me, considering the lifestyle of my ex-husband?” How will I respond if he thinks I’m a sexual risk? I can’t really blame him. Honestly, I would wear a condom if I knew his last partner was involved in risky behavior. She was just stupid and irresponsible. I’ve been there, and I paid the ultimate price for my stupidity.
He pulls me tightly against his chest and squeezes the air from my lungs. His hand strokes my back. The breath I take is filled with his scent. He always smells so fresh and clean. It’s relaxing to be held in his arms.
“Listen to me. I’m not worried about getting anything from you. You’ve told me you’ve been tested many times. I trust you. I’m just not ready to have two babies in diapers.” He gently pushes me away from him and grimaces.
The breath I am unconsciously holding seeps through my lips. It’s an amazing feeling to know he isn’t afraid of me. I was afraid for myself for the longest time.
“I’m on the pill. There was no use stopping it just because I wasn’t sexually active. If you feel safer wearing condoms, I’m happy to buy them. However, I am diligent about taking my pill.”
“Oh, sweets, you just made me the happiest man on Earth. I can’t wait to feel you. I mean, actually feel you against me. Are you sure you want to start limiting my access to your body today? We just started.”
“How can I deny you when you make me feel so good?”
“I want to close the bar for the day and go back to Shady Lane to spend the day in bed. This new tidbit of information sends primal urges through my body.”
“I’m leaving right now. I need to get a supply of junk food for the girls and me. I can’t believe you don’t keep a supply of chocolate on hand for Claire and Ashley. You’re a horrible boss.”
“Candy is awful for you. If you take care of your body, it will take care of you.”
“How about you take care of my body, and I’ll do what makes me happy?”
“Deal.” He slips his hands around me and spins us in a circle. “Drive safely. Do you want to take the car or the truck? I’m not sure I trust that tin jalopy you drive.”
“It got me across the street,” I tease. “If I have a problem, I’ll call you on my phone and you can send out a rescue squad.”
“All right,” he says as he reaches for his wallet. “Take some cash for whatever you need.”
“Stop it, I’m buying stuff for the house. I want to pick up a few things to get us through for a few days, and also stuff to junk out on. It’s my way of contributing.”
It takes me about ten minutes to get to the store and about thirty minutes to get everything I need. I was even able to find a baby sling in the infant department. They had more than a few patterns to choose from, so I picked a lovely floral with reds, oranges, and yellows.
I can already tell unloading the groceries is going to be Zane’s job. After two trips to the car, there is no doubt in my mind these stairs are not my friend.
Ashley jumps for joy when she sees the cookies and candy I bought. I’m hoping my small contribution to her comfort helps soften her reticence to my being here.
I put everything away and skip downstairs to work on my project. When I walk through the door into the bar, I can feel the tension in the air.
I look around the room for Zane and find him sitting at a table in the corner by where I usually have my computer set up. I glance around the room to make sure everyone has what they need.
I can only see the back of the woman he is speaking to. She has long, silver-blonde hair. Her bare arms are tattooed from her shoulders to her wrists. She wears blue jeans and a leather vest over what appears to be a red T-shirt. I can see the fabric stretching over her butt.
I catch Zane’s eyes as I walk toward my table. He looks uncomfortable. Who’s the woman causing him so much trouble? What’s her business with my man?
I slide onto a stool and open my computer. I can’t hear their conversation clearly, but I pick up the heated parts.
I tune into words like baby and birth. I can’t stand to sit here and not know what is going on, so I get up and walk to the bar.
I begin to wipe down every surface, trying to stay occupied. I dart into the kitchen to chat with Bud.
“Hey, Lexi,” he says. “I didn’t think you came on until four.” He’s busy using the scraper to clean off the grill. “Can I get you something to eat?”
“I’m good for now. I’m actually just hiding out. I don’t want to hang upstairs, because I don’t want Ashley to feel like I’m watching her, and Zane is having what looks like a private conversation with a woman.”
“He tells me you two are shackin’ up.” He grins at me, and I see he’s missing a tooth on his lower right.
“Did he actually tell you we were ‘shackin’ up?’” I finger quote the word ‘shackin’’.
“Nah, he said he convinced you to move upstairs with him. I’m glad; he’s got it bad for you. So, no matter who that woman is, don’t get your panties in a twist. He likes you.”
Bud is a straight shooter, and I really appreciate his words of encouragement. He delivers them with his own zeal, but I know he’s just trying to ease my worry.
I walk back out to the bar and see Zane pouring a beer from the tap.
“I can get that. It looks like you’re in a deep conversation.”
I pull the glass from his hand and seamlessly finish the pour. He gives me a quick kiss before walking back to the beautiful blonde at the table. I look over at the woman he’s talking to. She stares at me with something akin to curiosity. I don’t know her, but I don’t like her. I don’t like her look, and I certainly don’t like the way she is getting Zane riled up.
Trying to keep distracted, I pull my phone out of my pocket and dial my sister. It’s been a long time since we have spoken. We occasionally email, but that’s about it. We used to be really close, but the conflict within my family has made me guarded when it comes to them.
The phone rings three times before her bubbly voice answers with a hello.
“Hi, Ava. It’s Alexa.” I wait for a glimmer of voice recognition.
“Oh, my God, where are you? Did you finally get to where you’re going?” She rattles off a few more questions before I get a word in edgeways.
“I’m good. Actually, I’m better than good. I’m working a lot. One job is doing contract work, and the other is waiting tables at a bar called Last Resort.” I glance over at Zane and see his face is red with fury. “I have a thing going with the owner. It’s a really healthy situation for me. It wouldn’t be for everyone, but it’s been good for me. He has a beautiful little boy named Aaron.”
“What? Wait? You’re waiting tables? Where are you living? I want to come see you.”
“I’m in Sugar Glen. It’s just a few hours outside of Los Angeles. I didn’t get very far.”
“It sounds like an awful place. Is it even on a map?” I think about that for a few minutes, but I can’t honestly answer her. I figure if it exists, it’s probably on a map.
“It’s a small town, but big enough for a Walmart. The people are really nice, and I finally feel like myself again.”
My attention is driven to the table in the corner. I watch in astonishment as the woman pushes away from the table and upends everything on it. She pushes Zane roughly, shoving him into the wall.
“Ava, I gotta go.”
I hang up abruptly and walk toward the fighting couple. I don’t know why I just thought of them as a couple. I suppose it’s because they seem like they are familiar with one another. I don’t like where my mind is going with this situation.
I get about five feet from them when I hear something that punches me right in the gut.
“I came in here thinking I could see my baby, and you tell me no. Who do you think you are?” Her eyes turn to me as she spews out the rest of her venom. “I find you looking like a lovesick puppy. What is she to you? She isn’t even your type. She looks like a fucking schoolteacher. You and I both know you’ll fuck her and forget her. You’re not the settling down type.”
“You don’t know me, Tabitha. I fucked you once and forgot about you, but that’s not my M.O., and even if it were, you changed that by abandoning my baby at a hospital in San Francisco. You have no right to see him.” The woman begins to cackle. I don’t know what she finds so funny. Zane’s eyes look toward me, then back at the woman standing in front of him. “You are the worst kind of person. The only credit I’ll give you is that you didn’t abort him. That would have been unforgivable.”
His words rip at my heart. I start forward again, but I’m stopped with her final declaration.
“You’re so gullible, Zane. The baby you picked up isn’t even yours. You were the only number I had, and I wanted someone to pay my bill.” She turns around, leaving him standing there with his mouth open.
She walks straight toward me. I stumble back a few steps, not trusting what she intends to do. As soon as she is in front of me, she pushes on my shoulder and begins screaming at me.
“You’re stupid if you think he wants you. He’s a biker. He’s using you to take care of that baby he has. I can’t believe how stupid people can be.”
Rage overtakes me. I have been pushed around so much in my life. I have allowed the people who were supposed to love me, hurt me, but I refuse to let this stranger do it.
Feeling like I’m having an out-of-body experience, I reach up and grab a handful of her hair. I begin walking her—dragging her—to the door. When we get within a few feet of the entrance, I tug extra hard and come away with a handful of blonde hair.
“Get out of this bar, and don’t ever fucking come back. You gave them both up, and now it’s time for you to move on.”
I toss her on her ass outside the door and go about my business. When I look up, I see the smiles of several patrons and the shocked look on Zane’s face.
He walks into the kitchen and comes back with Bud. His fingers intertwine with mine.
“Let’s go.” He pulls me through the kitchen and out the back door. We sit on the picnic bench and embrace the silence of the moment.
Will he be angry with me for kicking that woman out on her ass? It wasn’t my place, but I couldn’t stand there and watch her create more havoc. She had just finished telling this wonderful man the boy he’s raising isn’t his.
“Alexa, I want you to know you are not in my life because I need a babysitter. I have plenty of volunteers for that.”
I think back to our visit at his mom’s house, and I’m sure all he would need to do is smile, and nearly every woman in town would be here in a heartbeat.
I hear the distant ringing of a phone, but I can’t place where it’s coming from. He reaches behind me and grabs the phone from my pocket.
I shake my head, feeling a bit stupid I didn’t even recognize my own ringtone. I flip it open and say hello.
“Yes, I’m okay,” I say in-between her frantic questions. “No, it’s not a dangerous place. Listen, I have to go. I’ll call you later.” I hang up the phone and place it on the bench.
“Who is that?” he asks.
I’m incredibly sore between my legs, but if he asked me to have sex right here on the table, I fear I would surrender without an argument.
“It’s my sister. I called her as a distraction in the bar.”
“Alexa, look at me.” He pinches my chin between his thumb and index finger and raises my face to look into his. I stare into his eyes. There is a range of emotions surfacing, but the one I see the clearest is concern. “You’re here because we connect on some level that’s special. I’m not a love them and leave them guy. That’s not my motto, and I don’t want you to think that it is.”
“I didn’t think that. Are you really worried about that? I see you for who you are. I know you’re a good man.” I cup the side of his cheek and feel him relax. “That woman tells you Aaron isn’t yours, and your first concern is whether or not I think you’re using me?”
“Oh, God, this is so awful,” he says. He buries his head in his hands and groans.
“Aaron only knows you. You’re the only father he’s had. I’m sorry she hurt you by her claim. I’m not sure she would even know the truth.” I run my fingers through his hair. “He’s lucky to have you. I hope you can see past this and not punish him for her sins.”
“It doesn’t matter to me whose sperm created that boy. The day I held him, he became mine. I may not be his biological father, but I’m damn sure I’m his dad.”
Chapter Thirteen
His truth hits me like a sledgehammer to the head. Here is this man who has just found out his son possibly has no genetic connection to him, and he’s worried I may feel offended by the twat-head of a woman who birthed Aaron.
I feel my emotions surging out of control. I know where this is going, and I need to escape quickly. Every hurt I’ve ever felt is coming to the surface. I’m going to an ugly place. There’s no stopping it.