The Nickel Man

by Brian Stableford

  AESOP: And what form has Newton given the Earth.

  PEMBERTON: A shape flattered at the poles.

  AESOP: Be careful, Newtonians, not to misinterpret the phenomena, which is very common in those who have embraced false theories. A second error might be less pardonable than the first.

  JOUROUFLE: Have no fear of that misfortune, Seigneur Aesop, for we Newtonians, having been able to consider the Earth from all sides, have even been able to determine its form in their fashion. What is that fashion? It is this,

  Monseigneur Newton, having created his magnificent theory of universal gravitation, supposed—for who can take away the right, so convenient, to make suppositions?—that the Earth had been fluid before having received a movement of rotation about its axis. According to his theory of universal attraction, all the particles of matter having to attract one another mutually, he concluded, nevertheless, that because of the effect of the circular movement the poles of the Earth would be closer to the center while the equator would be further away. Why? Because centrifugal force must be more sensible at the later point than at the poles—but still in the convenient supposition that the atmosphere did not exist, or that it could not compress either the solids or the liquids reposing in the surface of the globe. Is that not conclusive, and does it not demonstrate that the Earth must be flattened at the poles?

  PLUCHE: I ask Monsieur Jouroufle when the Earth, fluid at first according to him, became compact and solid; for if it had remained fluid for some time, the dissipation of all its particles would have ensued, by virtue of the rotational movement of the terrestrial axis.

  JOUROUFLE: How curious you are! To be sure, the globe became solid when Monseigneur Newton judged it appropriate.

  PLUCHE: That’s clear, but did the seas also become solid? Otherwise they would similarly have been dissipated by the reiterated action of centrifugal force.

  JOUROUFLE: Oh, Newton found by his calculations the point where they ought to stop, and they stopped.

  BERNARDIN DE SAINT-PIERRE: Very good! We thank Newton for having preserved us from a great misfortune, for without his far-sighted calculations, we would have no more seas or water. Honor, therefore, to the makers of systems, they are always helpful!

  PLUCHE: So it’s almost folly to want to inconvenience then; they’re accustomed to having their elbows free.

  JOUROUFLE: Pluche and Bernardin, you chatter like magpies, but I can see the reason for it. It’s because you want to deflect our attention from the question that is now at stake; you’re troubled by what On the Search for the Truth in the Sciences says about that subject, and don’t know how to defend it.

  BERNARDIN DE SAINT-PIERRE: You’re strangely mistaken, Monsieur Jouroufle, and far from being unable to prove what On the Search for the Truth in the Sciences says about the shape of the Earth, we do not blush to assert it ourselves, and to support it presently.

  JOUROUFLE: You affirm against Newton that the Earth is not flattened at the axis?

  BERNARDIN DE SAINT-PIERRE: Yes, for we’re sure that it’s slightly elongated.

  JOUROUFLE: Behold the obstinacy of these Frenchmen in wanting to deny the most sublime of hypotheses, first imagined by Monseigneur Newton the Englishman, and then demonstrated in our fashion by the most beautiful observations.

  AESOP: What are these observations?

  JOUROUFLE: What, Seigneur Aesop, you don’t know that people have been to Peru and the polar circle to measure the Earth in order to determine its shape? Oh, what a fine result as obtained from those beautiful observations!

  AESOP: I had not heard of it until today, but in any case, what was the result of these fine operations?

  JOUROUFLE: You shall see. Let’s begin at the beginning. While Monseigneur Newton, by means of his genius and his suppositions, determined the form that our globe ought to have, Monsieur Picard in France and Mr. Norwood in England found that the degrees of the meridian were smaller in the first of those two countries, and, in consequence, that those degrees augmented in amplitude in going northwards.20

  AESOP: And doubtless Newton reformed his ideas and saw that the Earth was slightly elongated toward the north pole; for that evidently results from the measurements made.

  JOUROUFLE: Not at all. Do you think he would be so gauche? That would have destroyed the generality of his theory of universal attraction, which he wanted to prevail even so. The Earth had to be flattened at the poles, or his theory would have been overturned.

  AESOP: And no scientist or Academician saw things differently than Newton?

  JOUROUFLE: Yes indeed! Almost at the same time, Monsieur Dominique Cassini,21 the famous astronomer, measured another part of the meridian which passes through France, and found that in that part of the globe, the southern degrees were, on the contrary, greater than the northern.

  AESOP: From that he doubtless concluded that if all the terrestrial meridians similarly had smaller degrees in proportion to their proximity to the poles, the Earth must be flattened in the direction of its poles, because the meridians being shorter there, the line of the axis there must also be shorter.

  JOUROUFLE: Yes, that’s what he decided.

  AESOP: He was right.

  JOUROUFLE: According to us, he was wrong.

  AESOP: Common sense says that his thinking was sound.

  JOUROUFLE: Our geometrical and mathematical principles interpreted in accordance with the mind of Newton...

  AESOP: Badly applied, no doubt.

  JOUROUFLE: …Demonstrated that his judgment was false.

  AESOP: Here, therefore, is the same figure resulting from two different measurements? That’s a curious phenomenon in the history of the sciences.

  JOUROUFLE : A curious phenomenon, Seigneur Aesop! Say rather something scandalous! For what can we think of our sublime mathematical sciences on seeing two first-rate scientists, on the subject of the same operation, judging differently and making opposite calculations?

  AESOP: That is, in fact, scarcely honorable for the sciences.

  JOUROUFLE: So it was to put an end to such a scandal that our scientists went to Peru and the polar circle to interrogate the Earth.

  AESOP: And it was mute?

  JOUROUFLE: On the contrary, it explained itself clearly, for it’s a docile beast.

  AESOP: It explained itself for good and all?

  JOUROUFLE: Yes, it declared that it really was flattered toward the poles, and in such a manner that no academician in any country whatsoever, and to scientist of merit dared doubt it now. So I don’t doubt it, in order not to appear ignorant, for like them, I only see through the eyes of our dear Newton.

  AESOP: And how did the Earth announce itself?

  JOUROUFLE: Like this. The French geometers might well have followed Monsieur Cassini’s opinion, for what did it matter to them whether the Earth’s meridians were shorter or longer toward the equator? But, being enthusiasts for Monseigneur Newton’s theory of universal gravitation, and wanting to make use of it in order to be illustrious themselves, their desired internally that our globe should have no other form than the one that the English scientist had attributed to it. Wanting to make sure of that for themselves, like conquerors they divided the Earth up in order to measure it again. Some headed for the equator, the others toward Lapland. Full of the object that had gripped their hearts, they began before their departure—note this well—to adopt the ideas of the illustrious Newton, made use of his principles and his methods, and, having the courage o follow him in the career that he had opened, they wanted to show themselves worthy of him in the explanation of phenomena. If you doubt what I’ve just said you can inform yourself by consulting the celebrated Bailly, who, a supreme admirer of Newton, has consigned all of these beautiful words to his Histoire de l’Astronomie.22

  AESOP: So much the worse.

  JOUROUFLE: Oh, rather so much the better. Those geometers could do no less to honor the great Newton, and the good opinion they had of that scientist proves, according to the same author,
their discernment and constitutes their greatest eulogy.

  AESOP: It might well form a contrary proof; and anyway, what happened when these scientists arrive in Peru and the polar circle?

  HEROMONDAS: They found that according to their own measurements, that one degree of the meridian in the former country had only 56,750 toises of amplitude, and that, by contrast, in the polar circle, the same degree was 57,438 toises, while the degree determined by Picard in France was only 57,060 toises—which is to say, greater than that on the equator and smaller than that in Lapland.23

  AESOP: So, the degrees of the terrestrial meridian are more extensive in proportion to one’s proximity to the poles?

  HEROMONDAS: That’s incontestable.

  AESOP: So, these scientist concluded from these measurements that the Earth participated in a slight flattening that went from the equator to the pole? For that is the consequence that one ought to draw from the measurements taken in different places.

  JOUROUFLE: Not at all. Do you think that those scientists saw like other people? The beauty of modern science was to conclude differently; the respect they had for Monsieur Newton demanded that, especially when they were only seeing through his eyes, as the learned Bailly ingenuously said.

  AESOP: They decided, then, that the Earth was flattered toward the poles in the sense of a line backed up to the diameter of the equator?

  JOUROUFLE: Precisely, and that the axis of the Earth was shorter that that diameter.

  AESOP: What inconsequence!

  JOUROUFLE: Speak more kindly, Monsieur Aesop. Do you take us for fools? Oh, if I displayed all our science for you! Astronomy, physics, chemistry, geometry, algebra, theories, sublime calculations, and what do I know what else? I’ll prove to you that we know everything, that we’ve discovered everything, that nothing can be other than we’ve demonstrated…but it’s necessary not to be too proud, in order not to excite the criticism of the severe posterity that does not like one to praise oneself, even when it is well-deserved. Savant and modest, Monsieur Aesop, that’s your servant Monsieur Jouroufle.

  AESOP: I’d like to believe all that you tell me about your supreme merit, but you’ll permit me, Monsieur Jouroufle, to tell you that in spite of all your science, you’re mistaken with regard to the question that occupies us at present. For if the Earth had the degrees of its meridians shorter toward the poles than toward the equator, it would have its poles flattened and its axis shortened, as the illustrious Dominique Cassini recognized. But on the contrary, must be elongated toward those same poles if the degrees are less great at the equator than toward the polar circle, which the false hypothesis of Newton argues.

  JOUROUFLE: Oh, you would think differently, Seigneur Aesop, if, in our fashion and in accordance with Monseigneur Newton’s theory, we make you a little geometrical demonstration bristling with a little algebra and seasoned with parallel lines, angles and verticals. I’ll stun you so forcefully that you’ll be unable to respond. Would you like me to commence that learned demonstration?

  AESOP: To judge the question of the shape of the Earth, of which has one has measured one of the meridians, it only requires common sense.

  JOUROUFLE: Try a little, Seigneur Aesop. Be brave! Don’t be so difficult, and soon, like Monsieur Dominique Cassini, you’ll be singing the recantation.

  AESOP: What! The illustrious Cassini changed his mind?

  JOUROUFLE: Not him, exactly, because he was no longer alive then, but his numerous friends did it for him, because we twisted them so much with our algebraic, geometric, mathematical and Newtonian demonstrations that we forced them to correct his writings and to make him say, although dead, that his measurements of the meridian could not constitute the flattened shape that Newton had given the Earth. It was extremely important for us to obtain that retraction.

  AESOP: Is it possible that Cassini has been made to say what he did not think?

  JOUROUFLE: Yes, and see what miracles algebra can work when one sees through the eyes and thinks with the mind of Monseigneur Newton.

  AESOP: That miracle is only illusory, and I blush for the honor of the sciences, for it will serve to prove, unfortunately, how one ought to mistrust your demonstrations, since neither the algebra nor the geometry that you praise so much have been unable to prevent illustrious scientists from falling into your traps, and have not given the any help to disentangle your false sophisms. But that’s enough discussion of the question of the shape of the Earth; simpler experiments will soon judge it in an incontestable manner. Let someone bring me three balls of clay of the same diameter and a certain quantity of the same material.

  A PHYSICIST of the retinue: President, we have the three balls of clay you requested.

  AESOP: Illustrious Maupertuis, I dare say that you would like to cooperate with these experiments. I know that you took part in the voyage the French geometers made to the polar circle and that you have supported the flattening of the poles,24 but I also know that in your later years you recognized all the deceptive glamour of science. I can therefore believe that you will have listened benignly to all that has been said against the shortness of the axis, and that you will not make any difficulty about giving me your aid to clarify, in a definitive manner, the question presently under discussion. Take these three balls, then, and trace on them the circle of the equator and the line of the meridian. Also mark the poles precisely. By that means, the meridian will be divided into four parts. Then divide one of those parts into ninety equal divisions, which will be as many degrees to represent the quarter of the terrestrial meridian in the case that our globe were to be perfectly round. As for you, Monsieur Jouroufle, I charge you to interrogate these balls in order to obtain a exact response that can indicate unequivocally whether the Earth is slightly flattened or slightly elongated.

  JOUROUFLE: Spare me that, Seigneur Aesop, I beg you.

  AESOP: Why?

  JOUROUFLE: Because I’m not fortunate in the results of my experiments.

  AESOP: Perhaps you’ll see accurately this time.

  JOUROUFLE: Precisely, that’s what warns me not to get mixed up in it, for it might well be that by virtue of seeing accurately, I’ll encounter something that will sink our hypotheses.

  MAUPERTUIS: President, here are the three balls divided as you desire.

  AESOP: Have you measured each of the ninety degrees that form the quarter of their meridian?

  MAUPERTIUS: Yes, President.

  AESOP: What measure have you found for each degree?

  MAUPERTUIS: Fifty-six lignes, which can represent the 56,000 and some toises that constitute a degree of the terrestrial meridian near the equator.

  AESOP: Now, leave one of the three balls in its present state. As for the other two, this is what is to be one. Without touching the first three degrees toward to equator, which will retain the same amplitude in order to provide a standard for comparison, it’s necessary to swell the poles of one of the other two balls, in such a manner that its axis is longer, and that he diameters of the circles parallel to the equator going toward the north pole are a little larger than those on the round ball. You’ll do the opposite for the third ball, so that one will have its axis and the diameter of its parallels shorter than in the round ball.

  MAUPERTUIS: It’s sufficient.

  AESOP: The operation with which I want to charge Monsieur Jouroufle is not very difficult. It’s a matter of knowing whether the quarter of the round ball can contain 90 times 56 lignes in going from the equator to the pole.

  JOUROUFLE to Pemberton: Shall I take the ball?

  PEMBERTON: Take it if you wish, but be careful not to betray Newton.

  JOUROUFLE: Well, I find that on the quarter of the meridian of that ball I can place ninety times fifty-six lignes.

  AESOP: Marvelous! So, if the Earth were perfectly round, all the degrees of its meridian would be equal?

  JOUROUFLE: Incontrovertibly.

  AESOP: Now take the ball that has just been diminished toward the poles, whose axis i
n, in consequence, shorter and see if you can place an equal quantity of lignes a similar number of times between the equator and one of the poles.

  JOUROUFLE: Not so stupid, Seigneur Aesop. I’d be furnishing a rod for my back by attempting that new experiment, for is it not obvious that, the poles not having as much matter, the diameter of their parallels being smaller, and the axis consequently shorter than in the round ball, it is necessarily the case that the arc formed by the quarter of the meridian will be shorter. If it’s shorter, one could never find room there to carry 90 times 56 lignes. If one wanted to conserve the same number of divisions, it would be necessary to diminish the magnitude of the degrees in proportion to the flattening of the poles.

  AESOP: This time, Monsieur Jouroufle, you have given proof of discernment and spoken in accordance with veritable common sense.