Wrong Side of the Tracks: a Hope Valley novel

by Prince, Jessica

  “Hey, Detty.”

  “Darlin’, where are you right now?”

  There was something in her voice that made my stomach sink and the hairs on my arm stand on end. “Just a few minutes away. Why? What’s up?”

  “Okay, first, let me just start off by sayin’ that everything is gonna be all right.”

  Her reassurance only worried me that much more. “Odette, what’s going on?”

  “Holly had a little accident. We’re at Mercy right now getting her looked at.”

  My back went ramrod straight. My stomach revolted, and a wave of nausea crashed into me so strong it made my head spin and my skin clammy. “You’re at the hospital?” I shouted. I vaguely noticed Marco’s head shoot around to me, but I couldn’t concentrate on anything but Odette at that moment.

  “Calm down, child. Like I said, everything’s gonna be just fine. The doctors think she broke her arm, so they’ve taken her back for an X-ray.”

  Her words suddenly faded beneath the roar of blood rushing through my ears. The edges of my vision began to darken as black crept in, and for some strange reason, my lungs felt like they were on fire.

  “Christ. Gypsy, baby, breathe.”

  Okay, so that explained the sudden burning tightness in my chest. I didn’t even realize I was holding my breath until Marco’s voice broke through. I jerked my head around when he took the phone from me and put it up to his ear.

  “Odette? Yeah, you got Marco. Tell me what’s going on.” He paused as she spoke. “Okay. Yeah.” Another pause. “All right, Detty, just hang tight. I’m bringing her there now.”

  He disconnected the call and stuffed the phone into one of the cupholders in the console between us before casting his eyes my way. “Just hold on, Gypsy. Everything’s going to be all right. I promise.”

  I didn’t say a word, because the truth was, I wasn’t sure I believed him.

  * * *

  I barely gave Marco a chance to come to a complete stop before jumping out of the Cherokee and rushing toward the entrance of the hospital.

  Marco caught up to me when I nearly ran into the glass doors, moving faster than they could slide open.

  “Girasol, you need to calm down,” he said placatingly, taking my hand in his.

  I whipped my head around and wrenched my hand free as I narrowed my eyes. “Don’t tell me to calm down,” I snapped. “This wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t left in the first place.”

  He blanched at the accusation riddled through my words. If I were being honest with myself—which I wasn’t—I felt like an asshole for putting this all on him. But years of ingrained behavior was impossible to change overnight, and going on the attack when I was frightened or backed into a corner was my MO.

  I wanted to take it back the moment I said it, but my goddamn pride was my biggest downfall, and at that moment, I couldn’t think of anything but getting to Holly. I was so panicked I couldn’t form a single rational thought. Those kids were my life, and if anything ever happened to them…. I couldn’t even finish that thought.

  Running into the emergency room, I charged the desk like a madwoman, slapping my hands on the ledge and causing the nurses behind it to jump. “Holly Bradbury.”

  “E-excuse me?” the flustered woman in scrubs asked, looking at me like I was insane. It was fitting, considering I was seconds away from losing it.

  “Gypsy.” I whipped around at the sound of a familiar voice. The sight of Temperance was momentarily obstructed when my hair whipped into my face, but I quickly brushed it out of my way. Seeing her now helped to wash away some of the anxiety that had sunk its claws deep inside me. Not only was she one of my very best friends, but she was also an incredible nurse. I knew if she was watching over Holly, my precious girl was going to be okay. “She’s back here, honey. Come on, I’ll take you to her.”

  I headed down the corridor, allowing Tempie to take my hand in a show of comfort as she guided me along the curtained-off emergency room bays. We stopped at the third on the left, and she pulled the curtain aside.

  “Gypsy!”

  “Hey, doodlebug!” My breath hitched when I saw her. She looked to tiny on that bed. I gave her my biggest, brightest smile as I rounded the hospital bed and stopped at her side. Her arm was being held in a sling, and as I reached up to push her golden blonde hair from her face, I nearly broke down. There was a cut on her forehead held together with butterfly strips, and her ruddy cheeks were streaked with dried tears. My poor baby. “How are you feeling, sweetie?”

  “I’m okay” she chirped. “They gave me a sucker before I got X-trayed.”

  “X-rayed,” I corrected.

  “Uh-huh. That’s what I said.” Her eyes darted over my shoulder and went big right before she let out a squeak so loud it nearly burst my eardrum. “Marco! Did you come to see me?”

  In my frantic need to get to Holly, I’d somehow managed to forget about the large, sexy man who’d been with me. I looked over my shoulder just in time to see him wipe the brooding mask from his face and smile down at my sister. “Sure did, preciosa. Had to make sure my girl was all right.”

  “I flied, Marco!” she cried excitedly. “Ray bet I couldn’t do it, but I did! I climbed up on the top bunk and jumped off and flied!”

  “It’s flew, baby girl,” I said, giving her an unhappy look. “And from the looks of that arm, you did more falling than flying.”

  “I flew,” she enunciated sarcastically, “for two seconds. Then I fell. Now Ray has to give me two dollars!”

  “I’m all for you winnin’ a bet, sweetheart,” Marco said with warm adoration. “But how about you only take bets that keep your feet on the ground from here on out?”

  The exuberance washed from her expression. “That’s no fun.”

  “It’s more fun than getting hurt and having to come to the hospital, right?” I asked. She nodded begrudgingly, like having to admit I was right caused her physical pain. “Speaking of….” I looked at Tempie. “What’s the verdict?”

  “The doctor will be in soon to go over everything, but she’s going to need a cast.” I did my best to keep my flinch from being noticeable at the news. “We’ve checked the cut on her head, and fortunately there are no other injuries.”

  It felt like a weight had been lifted off my chest at the news that my girl was okay, but as I stood there trying to mentally calculate the cost of this visit, the coffee I’d ingested early began to curdle in my stomach. Since my parents bailed without a word, I wasn’t technically the kids’ legal guardian, so I couldn’t get them on the crappy insurance plan the grocery store offered. That meant everything that happened today was going to have to come out of pocket, which meant the tiny reserve I’d managed to squirrel away into savings was more than likely going to disappear completely.

  “Well, looks like you got lucky, doodlebug,” I said, looking back down at my sister. “But no more trying to fly, you got me? You probably gave poor Detty a heart attack.” For the first time since entering the room, I looked to my friend. “Thank you so much for taking care of her.”

  “Please, child. You know I love these babies like my own. They keep me young. I’m just sorry our little Holly got hurt on my watch.”

  “Don’t even,” I started. “You have nothing to apologize for. It could have happened to anyone. And knowing my kids, it’s a wonder this hasn’t happen sooner and with a lot more frequency.” I looked around the tiny cubicle. “Speaking of… where are the rest of the kids?”

  “Rhodes and Sunny stayed back at the house,” Odette answered.

  Then Tempie spoke. “Ray and Raleigh were getting restless hanging around here, so I called Nona to come pick them up.”

  I let out a beleaguered sigh. I more than appreciated my friends’ help. They loved me and the kiddos openly, but I couldn’t help but feel like a burden on them, especially at times like this. “Thanks, Tempie. I owe you and Nona one.”

  She waved me off. “Don’t be ridiculous. It’s what friends do.” Sh
e truly meant that, but it didn’t make me feel any better. “There’s one silver lining in all of this though,” she said, turning to look at Holly. “You get to pick what color you want your cast to be. Any color at all.”

  “Ooh! Purple!” she shouted before shifting her attention back to Marco. “Are you gonna sign my cast when I get it on?”

  “Of course, baby girl. You want, I’ll even draw you a little picture.”

  “Yeah!”

  The more he interacted with Holly, the more I felt like the worst person in the world for how this entire day had gone so far, including what I’d said to him when we first arrived at the hospital.

  The doctor showed up a few minutes later, a sweet older gentleman with a wonderful bedside manner. Marco excused himself while Tempie wrapped Holly’s arm in a bright purple cast, and Dr. Blumsfeld told me everything I needed to know. She’d be stuck in that thing for six weeks, and then I had to bring her back for him to make sure the bone set correctly.

  Another visit meant another hefty hospital bill, but it was what Holly needed, so I had no choice but to find a way to make it work.

  The cubical we were in suddenly felt too small, the people inside of it sucking up all the available oxygen and making it impossible to breathe.

  “If you’ll excuse me for just a minute,” I mumbled, my hands shaking as I started shuffling backward. “I’ll be right back.”

  Spinning around, I forced my legs to carry me at a normal pace down the hall when I really wanted to run. I needed air, but no matter how hard I tried to suck in a breath, my lungs only filled halfway.

  “Shit,” I panted, bending forward and bracing my hands on my knees as I tried to clear the spots from my vision.

  “Gypsy?” Marco’s voice sounded like it was coming from deep within a tunnel. I was in the midst of a full-blown panic attack and couldn’t shake it off. “Jesus, what happened?” I heard his pounding footsteps just before his arms wrapped around me, pulling me up and holding me against his chest. His eyes were frenzied as he studied my face. “Talk to me. Is it Holly? Is she okay?”

  “She’s… she’s fine.” I closed my lips and tried breathing steadily through my nose. “She’s fine. She’s good.”

  “Then what’s going on? You’re freaking me out. I need you to talk to me.”

  “I can’t—” My voice cracked on a muffled sob as my vision blurred with tears. “I don’t know how the fuck I’m gonna pay for this,” I whispered, feeling completely and utterly worthless. “My baby’s in there right now, getting her arm cast, and I’m out here having a goddamn panic attack because I don’t know how I’m going to pay the hospital bills!”

  “Shh,” he soothed, pulling me deeper into him and pressing my cheek into my chest. “It’s okay, girasol. It’s all gonna work out, okay? I promise you.”

  “How?” I squeaked, pulling back to look at him. “How can you possibly promise that? She doesn’t have any insurance, Marco. Every time I think I’m getting our heads above water another wave comes crashing over us and we’re sucked right back down.”

  His jaw worked as he glanced off to the side, appearing almost hesitant before looking back at me. “At the risk of pissing you off, I’m just gonna tell you now. While you were in there with the doctor, I went and talked to someone from billing. Holly’s medical bills are going to be sent to me.”

  “What?” Jerking out of his arms, I took two steps back, my eyes wide as saucers. “You… you can’t do that!”

  “I can, and I did,” he replied, clenching his fists at it sides. “It’s already done.”

  “Jesus, Marco!” I cried, yanking my hands through my hair. “You had no right to do that. It’s not your place to take care of my kids!”

  “I did what had to be done so you could breathe easier, and Holly could be taken care of. Fuck, Gypsy. I have the money to help you, so why won’t you just let me?”

  Just like that, everything I’d been carrying around, all the weight that had been resting on my shoulders my whole life, all the pain and heartbreak I’d suffered, became too much, and I snapped.

  “Because you’ll leave!” I shouted, my sharp words reverberating off the bare, sterile walls. “You’ll give just enough to make us depend on you, and then you’ll disappear and I’ll be left to pick up the pieces when you’re gone.”

  Marco’s chin jerked back in shock, his face a mask of incredulity. “What the hell are you talking about? I’m not going anywhere.”

  A bark of acerbic laughter rattled up my throat. “You say that now, but trust me, you’ll leave, Marco. Everyone leaves.”

  “Not me,” he gritted out, the muscles in his neck straining. “For fuck’s sake, Gypsy, I’m in love with you.” I sucked in a painfully sharp gasp, rocking back at the impact of those words. “I love you, and I love those kids. I’m not leaving, baby. You have to trust me.”

  I shook my head violently. “No. No, you don’t love me.”

  “What the fuck?”

  “I’ve been down this road, Marco. I’ve heard the pretty words, the sweet declarations, and it all ends the same exact way. With me all alone. You know why you can’t have more of me? Because I’ve given so much of myself away, torn pieces of myself off for assholes and users who didn’t deserve them, that there’s hardly anything left!” Tears began streaming down my cheeks. “I can’t afford to give you more. All that’s left belongs to those kids. You can’t have it because it’s theirs.”

  A look of anguish washed over his face then. He took a step closer and reaching for me, but I shot back. “No,” I snapped, feeling stripped bare and broken. “Please, Marco. I need you to leave, okay? Just leave.”

  “Baby, I’m not—”

  “Just leave!” I cried, wrapping my arms around my middle, trying to keep everything I was feeling from leeching out of me.

  “Gypsy—”

  “That’s enough for now.” At the sound of Odette’s voice, we both shot around to find her watching our exchange. Her face was awash with sorrow, but she held strong. “This isn’t the time or the place to have this out.” She turned to me, and I could see the damp welling in her eyes before she looked at Marco. “Pains me to my very heart to say this, but it’s probably best if you do what she asked, honey.”

  “Odette—”

  She lifted a hand to cut him off. “I know, Marco. I know. But I’ve got her for now. You have my word.”

  I watched as Marco’s entire frame sagged in defeat, and when his gaze met mine, the sorrow inside them nearly brought me to my knees. Lowering his head, he gave it a shake before doing exactly what I’d demanded he do.

  Leave.

  Chapter Twenty

  Gypsy

  The next two weeks had been some of the worst weeks I’d ever lived through. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw Marco walking away from me and my heart broke all over again.

  I had no one but myself to blame for the misery I was suffering with. It was an endless cycle I couldn’t pull myself out of no matter how hard I tried.

  So I stopped trying. I couldn’t make the pain go away, but at least I could pretend I wasn’t slowly dying inside.

  Or at least that was what I told myself. But every night I worked at Pink Palace, I’d step out into the parking lot after my shift to find Marco leaning against his Cherokee, and I’d lose it all over again.

  He never said a word, never even moved. But I knew he was there to make sure I was safe. And that killed me a little more inside every night.

  Part of me wanted to ask him to stop, to tell him I didn’t need him looking after me with Xander there, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. There was a bigger, stronger part that craved those moments. They were my lifeline. My heart would give a little jump every time our eyes locked, and that was the only time I knew the organ in my chest was still working.

  Marco’s absence wasn’t felt by just me, either. Since I forced him out of our lives, Rhodes had become surly and short-tempered, snapping at all of us without provocation. S
unny and Ray were both being quiet, casting me unhappy looks and giving one-word answers to all of my questions. Raleigh had taken to throwing tantrums at night when I tried to rock him to sleep, and my normally bright and bubbly Holly was moping around like someone kicked her puppy.

  It was all my fault, and I knew I needed to fix it, if not for me, then for them. But fear kept me from acting.

  My friends were all being extremely careful with me. Not used to witnessing me in such a state, they weren’t sure how to react, so they’d taken to treating me like I was made of glass or constantly hovering to make sure I was all right. But not Odette. She knew better. She knew I wouldn’t break any more than I already had, so she didn’t hesitate to come over every night and tell me what a huge mistake I was making by pushing Marco away.

  Like I didn’t already know that.

  The loss of Marco had seeped into every aspect of my life. My performances at Pink Palace had gone downhill, and my tips were shit in response. Hell, I was so clearly depressed that McKenna had taken to watching me with a constant look of worry on her face. Even Xander would give me pitying looks every time we glanced at each other. So I eventually stopped looking.

  “How are you tonight?” McKenna asked once I finished my last performance of the night and headed back to the dressing room.

  I shot her a scathing look as I used a cleansing wipe to scrub the makeup from my face. “I just danced to a Poison track. How do you think I’m doing?”

  She winced in response.

  Since the memories were so damn painful, I’d cut all Civil Corruption songs from my sets and had to scramble to replace them. Tips were bad enough as it was, if I broke down into a sobbing mess in the middle of working the pole I’d be screwed.

  “You know,” she started tentatively, “if you ever need to talk, I’m here. You’ve always been so kind to me. And… well, I don’t have a lot of friends here, but I’ve always thought of you as one. So I just want you to know… I’m here.”

  My nose stung and my eyes began to water as I leaned over and pulled her into a hug. “Thank you, Mac,” I whispered into her hair. “I consider you a friend too.”