Love and Decay, Boy Meets Girl

by Rachel Higginson

here. They had no idea what they were getting themselves into. Or maybe they did and they were just foolish enough to believe they were better than legions of Zombies and men who decided human life meant little more than the Feeders that hunted them. “What’s down there that would make you willing to face Zombies in hordes, or worse, ex-cartel that would enslave you and make you entertain whole encampments of men?” My hands had started to shake at my sides from the frustrated feeling of helplessness and I hated it. I flexed and clenched them trying to get my emotions under control. But Pandora’s Box had been opened and I had been completely reawakened with Reagan’s entrance in my life- a corpse resuscitated, a soul revived, a future reimagined.

  “It’s the mountains,” Reagan whispered as if it cost her something.

  I pulled all those intense, consuming emotions back, regained some mental stability and tried really hard to look at this from her perspective. She had been on the run since her parents died- probably hadn’t even taken the time to grieve for them or her dead boyfriend. Her life had gone from completely normal and probably a little spoiled to upheaval and constant danger. She didn’t have a home anymore, a permanent place to stay or anything but the pack on her back and her friend at her side. And both of those things could be taken from her at any given moment. She wasn’t suicidal… she was purposeless, lost, alone. She needed someone to give her something to work for. She felt out of control and needed a way to grapple back some of the stability she’d lost the moment Feeders entered the world.

  “We have mountains here,” I reminded her, testing her. I hoped that would persuade her away from the worst place she could possibly go.

  “My dad’s cousin lives, or um, lived down there. As far as I know, she’s still alive. Anyway, she was this missionary. She had an orphanage in the Andes Mountains. When things started to get bad, she begged my dad to move us down there. She said it was safer than Iowa. She was protected by the mountains, there were very few people up there and she knew of this ancient Mayan city that had walls. She said we’d be able to protect ourselves, rebuild society,” Reagan explained with that same confident voice.

  “Yeah, and when’s the last time you talked to her?” I pressed, feeling the anger rise again. Why couldn’t she see this plan was just completely bat shit?

  She didn’t miss a beat, “Right before my parents died. The phones were still working and my parents were considering it. They thought they would see how the assembly went, what other news was being floated around and then we would either stay or buy a plane ticket.”

  The length of time that had passed didn’t seem to faze her at all. This girl was an enigma- a surprising dichotomy of careful, world-wise cynicism and naïve hope and sweet belief. And there was something in that, something magnetic and irresistible.

  While I struggled with something helpful to say, my little sister caught a different point to the story than the rest of us. “Your parents died early,” she whispered. She looked at Reagan with a swelling compassion that kicked me in the chest. Even Page could see how hurt and broken Reagan and Haley were. I could probably give them and their crazy plan a break.

  Maybe.

  As long as they agreed to give it up before tomorrow morning.

  “You’ll never make it through Mexico,” I warned her.

  And I was right about her indomitable will because the next thing she said was, “We’ve made it this far.”

  I couldn’t indulge this fantasy anymore, “By pure luck and our generosity.”

  She snorted and shot me a patronizing glare, “Hardly. We would have made it out just fine. In case you didn’t notice, Haley swept up down there.”

  “Yeah, fine,” I conceded. “But now her gun is empty. And how much ammo do you have left, Reagan? You hadn’t even drawn your weapon when you came flying through that door. I bet you have less than a handful of bullets left. I bet you’re on the last of everything.”

  “That’s not entirely true. I’ve got plenty of makeup.”

  God, she was such a smartass. And it was kind of turning me on.

  “My point exactly.” I was right. She needed to admit that I was right.

  “Ok, great plan-maker, what’s your long term goal? You can’t stay here forever. Eventually you, too, will run out of supplies, water and food. Then, what?” She vibrated with anger and tension. Her cheeks blushed with frustration and her perfect lips pouted adorably at me.

  I wanted to keep her mad- keep her like this. And then kiss her until she turned all that passion and energy on me.

  I really needed to get my life together. What was going on with me? It had to be the two years of celibacy. It had to be.

  And that smart mouth.

  “We’re heading north,” Vaughan answered when I couldn’t. “Nova Scotia, or anywhere isolated in the Canadian provinces.”

  Nelson explained further only it sounded like he might be trying to sell it to them. “No slavers up north and not as many people-turned-Zombies to run into. We’re going through the Dakotas, taking our time so that we can stay strong, well-fed.”

  “Racing your way anywhere, so that you’re starving and unarmed is foolish.” Ok, probably that was low even for me, but I couldn’t help myself.

  “Going the pace of a snail, so that all that glorious land you were gunning for, is occupied and settled, is just as foolish,” she countered.

  “It’s not the California Gold Rush, Reagan. You’re playing with your lives when you expose yourself like this. You’re obviously starved and undersupplied. What would have happened to you if we wouldn’t have found you digging through the women’s clothing? Where would you have slept tonight?” I demanded. And I was honestly curious. They had survived this long, I could admire them for that. But they were playing with fire. They were risking their lives every moment they chose to live this vagabond existence. It was fine for them before. But now they had me. They had us.

  “What do you care, Hendrix?” she hissed at me, clearly unnerve by my questions and interest in their welfare. I was a little unnerved by it too- Ok, more than a little. “We are not your concern. In fact, in T-six hours, we’re going to be well on our way, headed toward the other side of the equator than you. Leave it alone.”

  We stared each other down, waiting for each other to break. I knew she wouldn’t. I knew she was dead set on her plan and well beyond reason. But she should know I wouldn’t back down either. Not a chance in hell.

  Vaughan cleared his throat, trying to diffuse the tension that was building between us. “Alright, now that we’ve gotten that settled, it’s time for bed, Page.”

  That set us all into motion. Vaughan got Page ready for bed and Haley and Reagan disappeared to do more girl stuff before they disappeared into their corner of our space.

  I stood there thinking for a long time- maybe too long. Eventually everyone was quiet and spaced out across our make-shift home.

  I walked over to where Vaughan and Nelson were talking in hushed voices. Nelson was sitting on my bed, while Vaughan leaned forward, elbows on his knees, head in his hands. I sat down heavily next to Nelson and Vaughan raised his head and met my stare with tired eyes.

  “We should have never let them in, Hendrix,” Nelson said in a low, regretful voice.

  “And why is that?” I demanded.

  “Because now they’re here. And we can’t ignore them.” Nelson stared at his feet, embarrassed to admit what I already knew he felt.

  “We at least should never have asked them what their plans were,” Vaughan sighed.

  “No,” I disagreed. “It started before that. For me, it started before we even let them in the door.”

  “So what are we going to do?” Vaughan demanded. “Go with them? What about the little ones? Or what about them? They haven’t exactly invited us along.”

  “We can take care of them,” I put in. “Protect them.”

  “Is that what this is about? You can’t protect
everyone, Hendrix. Even if we go with them, there’s no guarantee that….”

  “That’s not what Hendrix is saying,” Nelson interjected. “It’s not about protecting everyone who needs protection. If it were that, we never would have left home.”

  “Then what’s it about?” Vaughan demanded.

  “It’s about protecting them,” Nelson confirmed. “Come on, Vaughan. These girls…. They’re not going to make it by themselves. Even if they manage to fight off Feeders and the elements and hell, wild animals; there is no way settlements are going to keep letting them pass through. Look at them. They’re every sick bastard’s wet dream. They’re as good as whores if we don’t do something.”

  “Geez,” Vaughan spit out disgustedly.

  I hadn’t even thought it through that far. But Nelson was right.

  “They need us, Vaughan,” I confirmed in a serious voice.

  “And Page?”

  I already had my answer for this because it was true. “They’re obviously capable girls. Think of it as mutually beneficial. We protect them. They help protect Page. Plus, you have to admit having some female influence will be good for her. They’ll make all that girly stuff important. They’ll make her education important. Girls are naturals at those things. We haven’t even tried to teach her to read since we left with her. We’re keeping her alive, but we’re failing her in every other way.”

  “Damn it.” Vaughan put his head back in his hands and