by Nikki Brown
One day, he came home high and my mom had taken us to McDonald’s to get dinner instead of cooking. She was sick and it was a Saturday, so we just grabbed happy meals. He got home and beat her so bad that we had to call the ambulance. When she got to the hospital she found out that she was pregnant and he had killed the baby. They arrested him and we fled.
When we got here the woman that helped us leave got Mama a good job with the county and got us an affordable apartment. We were happy for once, Mama was happy. Until he found us.
Me and Denari had just got off the bus and we ran to the apartment. We were so happy because Mama’s car was home. She was usually at work but today she was at home. Running into the house, I ran right into the man that I hated the most. My father.
“So y’all little niggas just let ya mama put me in jail huh?” he asked and I said nothing. Denari was only six and I was nine, but I was wise beyond my years, I had to be.
“Dad, what are you doing here?”
“Oh, you don’t wanna see your old man?” he smirked.
“Reggie please.” Mama cried and the way he looked at her sent chills down my spine. I could feel that this wasn’t going to go good.
“Denari, go to Ms. Jenna house.” I told my brother but then my dad took a gun out of his waist band pointed it at us.
“Sit the fuck down,” he yelled. “Both of you.”
We both ran over and jumped on the couch. Mama had tears running down her face and she just kept mouthing the words I’m sorry and I love you. It was like she knew it was her end.
“Just please don’t hurt my boys.” She cried.
“Shut the fuck up Cheryl, you should of thought about that before you took my kids and ran all the way here.” he pointed the gun at her head and Denari started to cry. “Cry baby ass, shut the hell up before you be going the same place ya mama going.”
I grabbed Denari’s head and buried it under my arm so that his cries would be muffled. I said a small prayer that one of our nosy neighbors would hear the commotion and call the police. My dad laid the gun down and walked over to where Mama was sitting and took her by her feet and drug her to the floor and started punching her.
She tried to fight back but the more she did, the more he hit her until after a while she just stopped. Tears were falling freely from my eyes and I didn’t know what to do, what could I do. My dad started tearing all my mom’s clothes off, she was still fighting and I will always admire her for that. Once he had her all the way undressed, he looked at me and my brother.
“Look here.” he yelled and we looked his way. “This is what you do to a bitch that don’t listen to you.”
He put his hands around her throat and raped my mother right in front of us. He was laughing and grunting like he was putting on a show. He will never know what he did to us that day.
“Look at me baby, look into my eyes.” My mother said through bruised lips. “It’s gonna be okay. Denari baby...” Denari’s attention was on what my father was doing and I hated that. I tried to turn his head but he wouldn’t budge. “Take care of your brother.”
“Mama.” I cried as she reached up and clawed his eyes. He screamed and rolled off her cursing her like she wasn’t nothing. She grabbed me and my brother off the couch and moved us to the door and opened it and pushed us out. Right as we got out the door and turned around to make sure she was behind us, he shot her in the back of the head. “MAMA!” I screamed and he looked around and took off out of the apartment. “SOMEBODY HELP MY MAMA.” I screamed with all my might.
“Mommy wake up, wake up Mommy.” Denari cried as we watched the blood seep from her head. That sight would forever be etched into my mind.
Someone called the police and the ambulance but there was no use because she was gone and I would never hear her call me by my whole name when I was in trouble, or hear her tell me she loves me. He took that from me and I promised my mama in that hallway that I would make sure that he paid for what he had done.
He was apprehended while trying to get to the highway, back to Florida. We were put into the system, they tried to get family to take us in from Florida but no one would respond. No one even came to claim my mother’s body. The lady that helped us came down and helped bury her and she had a friend in Charlotte that helped boys like us.
The day we met Ann Barnes was a day that changed our life. She was an angel and she became our new mom. I missed Mama but I felt the love that Ann showed and I would forever be grateful.
I wiped the lone tear that had made its way down my face and pulled into the police station. I hated this fucking place, shit made me itch like I was allergic or something. I walked in and talked to the lady at the desk. She let me know that his bail was five g’s.
There was no telling what the fuck Denari did but like I said I understood why he acted the way he acted because I was there. I just wished he wasn’t so selfish in his actions.
“My nigga.” He said walking out about an hour later. “Good looking out, bruh.” He tried to dap me up but I looked at his hands and walked away. I wasn’t with that shit today.
“Nigga I want my five g’s back and today, muthafucka.”
“Man, I got you.” He said following behind me. “You tell them what was up?”
“I tried to tell Kayson but he didn’t even want to hear it.”
“Damn I ain’t wanna hear his shit.” Denari put his hands on his head. “He pissed huh?”
“Yep.”
“Hell, what’s new.” He said and sat back in the seat. I wanted to snap on his ass but honestly, it wasn’t any use, Denari was who he was. “Don’t be mad.”
“D man, you doing shit all wrong, we on the come up my nigga we don’t need this shit.”
“I know man but it wasn’t my fault.”
“Nigga it’s never your fault, fuck you mean?”
Denari didn’t take responsibility for anything that he did, shit was never his fault and he thought the world owed him something. It was time for him to grow up, I couldn’t keep doing this. Although I knew what he was dealing with, I also knew there was a better way to deal with it.
“Man, for real I was riding and chilling, Jizzy called and said come scoop. We rolled over to the liquor house off Sugar Creek. I bought a pint of that white jug and we were on the way back to the block to drink and shit. Cops pulled me over and searched my shit.”
“Cops just don’t pull you over D tell the whole fucking story.”
“Nigga said I ran a stop sign but I didn’t do no shit like that,” He smirked.
“With everything you just told me please explain how none of that is your fault.”
He didn’t say nothing and I knew he wouldn’t. I just shook my head and dropped his ass off at his crib. I wasn’t about to go there with him, I didn’t have the fucking energy. Who knew the saying “I Am My Brother’s Keeper,” was so much got damn work.
Chapter Three
Jaako
“Fuck Jaako.” Krista moaned as I skillfully explored her center.
Krista was flexible as shit and right now her ass was in that human pretzel shit and I had full access to her sopping wet pussy. The way my dick was glistening brought a huge smile on my face. When I got here she was pissed the fuck off, she wanted more time from me and I understood that, but I was a young nigga on the come up. I didn’t really have time for the wining and dining and I thought that Krista understood that, at least she said she did.
“Make me cum baby.” She moaned and that shit was a turn on.
We argued a lot but the one thing that always worked for us was our action in the bedroom. I knew that it wasn’t enough but it worked for now. My biggest fear was being alone and I hated that about myself. I’ve been that way since my parents died.
“Shit Krista.” I was about to nut and I wanted to make sure that she got hers too so I placed my thumb on her clit and pressed as I hit her with long deep strokes. I needed to remind her that there was nothing to fight about.
“Yes, baby y
es. God I love this.” She screamed.
“Well paint my dick with ya love.”
“Yes yes yes.” Her eyes rolled in the back of her head and her pussy muscles clamped around my dick and in minutes I could see our mixed juices covering my dick.
Both of us were panting and trying to catch our breath. I loved fucking Krista and I cared a lot about her, but I can honestly say that I wasn’t in love with her and she wasn’t in love with me. I could tell because she kept trying to make me into this nigga that she wanted me to be. Most of the time I obliged just to keep the peace and those other times turned into horrible arguments.
Krista released her legs from behind her head and I eased myself out of her. We hadn’t used condoms since the day we made shit official, she was on birth control because I wasn’t ready for kids. I wanted to be married and raise a family. I didn’t want a baby mama and honestly, I didn’t see a future with Krista. She was just my right now girl.
“Why are you staring off like you crazy?” Krista asked with a sour look on her face.
“Thinking about some shit.”
“Do you have to cuss so much?” she complained.
“Krista, that’s how I talk.” I let out a deep sigh.
“Yeah but you could work on that I mean it’s not like I hadn’t asked you to do that before.”
“Well maybe I’m good with me.”
She didn’t say anything she just got up and went to the bathroom. I heard the shower start and normally I would go in there with her, but I didn’t feel like hearing her tell me what I needed to do.
Krista wanted to be the man of the relationship. She wanted to run things and make all the decisions and for the most part I let her so I guess I could say this shit was my fault. I could have put her in her place a long time ago, but I was a laid-back ass nigga. I really didn’t care but as of late shit that she was doing was starting to piss me off.
I just hated to be alone. When I was younger my mom or my dad was always around. They showered me with so much love that I didn’t know what to do. I was spoiled as hell. My dad was that nigga to know around these streets, and he made sure that me and mama was good. We were something like street royalty. One night while we were sleep someone broke into my house and killed my mom and my dad, had I not went into the “safe place” my dad built in the floor of my room they probably would have killed me too.
After my parents were killed, I was sent to live with my grandma and she wanted nothing to do with me. She hated the fact that my mom chose my dad and she hated me because I was a product of that. She use to beat me for no reason, she wouldn’t feed me or buy me clothes. I got really sick once and she wouldn’t even take me to the doctor. I passed out at school and had to be rushed to the Children’s Levine Hospital at CMC where I met my angel, Ann Barnes. The state took me away from my grandmother and I was placed with Ms. Ann. I was 12 then and the last to be placed into her home. The day I met that woman changed my life.
“Dang you could have at least joined me in the shower.” Krista said with an attitude.
“Damn Krista can you do something other than complain please.” I gave her a nasty look and then headed to the bathroom and locked the door. I needed a few minutes. We argued like this all the time so I should have been used to it but the shit was starting to get on my got damn nerves.
I could hear my phone ringing in the room and I could have sworn I heard Krista say hello but I knew that she wouldn’t do no shit like that. We had too much respect for each other to do that. So I continued my shower and I thought I heard my phone again but I wasn't sure so I finished my shower.
I got out and I dried off. I walked into the room and my phone wasn’t where I put it. I looked at Krista like she sprouted two heads because I knew she didn’t touch my got damn phone. Usually I was real chill and tried not to flip too much but I was big on respect.
“Did my phone ring?” she didn’t answer. “You can’t fucking hear.”
“Jaako, language.” She continued to file her nails like she didn’t hear me. I walked over and snatched the file out of her hand and threw it on the ground. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“Did my fucking phone ring?” I said through gritted teeth.
“Yes!”
“I know you didn’t answer it.” I tilted my head because she knew better.
“Why can’t I answer your phone Jaako? I’ve never understood that,” she questioned me.
“Because you don’t pay the got damn bill and I don’t fuck with your shit that’s why.” I snatched my phone and looked to see who called and I saw that it was Yameka, our lawyer and the woman that I was going to marry one day. “What did you say to Yameka?” She didn’t answer and I slammed my hand on the wall next to where she was sitting on the bed.
“Calm down Jaako, is there something I should know about Miss Yameka? You sure are getting uptight about what I said to her.”
I shook my head because she just didn’t get it and honestly, I was tired of trying to explain it to her. Instead of sitting here arguing with her I got dressed. I didn’t want to call Yameka because there is no telling what the fuck Krista said so I was just going to pop up on her at her job.
“Where are you going? I thought we were gonna go out and chill?” she asked with a confused look on her face. I laughed sarcastically and continued to get dressed. “So, you don’t hear me now?”
“Krista I need to get the fuck away from you before I say something I don’t mean.” I gave her a look that let her know I wasn’t playing right now. She rolled her eyes and mumbled some shit under her breath; I laughed and headed out the door to go and holla at my future.
“I’m here to see Ms. Tate.” I said to the receptionist who was busy staring me down to hear anything that I was saying. I was easy on the eyes and I knew it and it was times like this that I used it to my advantage.
“Do you have an appointment Mr. Barnes?” She already knew who I was because of the streets and I made sure I came to see Yameka at least twice a week, more if she was being nice which wasn’t very often.
“No but I’m sure if you buzz her she will tell you that I can come back.” I stared her in the eyes and licked my lips and that was all that it took. She buzzed back and just like I thought Yameka told me to come back. I winked at the receptionist and headed back.
When I entered, Yameka hit her intercom that connected her to the receptionist. “Lisa next time Mr. Barnes comes in without an appointment, don’t let him sweet talk you into buzzing me.” Lisa giggled and so did Yameka. “Yes, he’s fine but that’s his damn problem.”
“Yes ma’am. It’s five; do you need anything else from me?”
“Nah baby girl, she’s in good hands.” I answered for her.
Lisa giggled. “Okay I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow Lisa.” Yameka said with a smirk on her face.
“Yeah, see you tomorrow.” I said right before Yameka hit the button.
Yameka was a lawyer and a damn good one at that. She had been defending us for a while now and I’ve been feeling her ever since. I even tapped it a few times but she let me know that that’s all that it would ever be. That was her mouth though; I knew I was wearing her down.
She sat on the other side of the desk with her long chocolate legs crossed. Her skin glistened under the light in her office. The way her thighs were playing peek-a-boo from under that skirt had my shit on brick.
“Down boy, I got shit to do.” She smiled.
“I’ll be quick.” I smirked.
“You don’t know what quick is,” she licked her lips. “And according to your little girlfriend, you should be well satisfied.” It was her turn to smirk.
Just that quick, my got damn dick went limp as hell. I didn’t even wanna know what the fuck was said. The look on her beautiful oval face and the sarcasm pouring from her doe shaped eyes, let me know that the conversation was nothing good.
“Well if you stop playing games with a nigga then I woul
dn’t even have to worry about her, now would I?”
“You’re not ready for me Jaako.” She purred. “I’m not her, I don’t play those games. I’m 32 years old and I ain’t with the shit.” She looked me right in the eye. “Plus, you know my job comes first. I wouldn’t have time for you.”
“Hell, my job comes first and I wouldn’t have time for you either, but I think we could make it work.”
“Shit’s good how it is. Why fix what’s not broken?”
“Because shit getting real for a nigga.” I pointed to my chest and I wasn’t bullshitting, I was really starting to feel something for her but I knew that she wasn’t trying to hear that shit. That's why I stayed with Krista.
“Well according to your girlfriend, I am to stay away from you unless it has to do with business.” She uncrossed her legs and I caught a glimpse of that pussy because her ass never had panties on. “She said that no one could handle you like she could, is that true Jaako?” Yameka hiked up her skirt a little.
“What the fuck you doing?” I rubbed my hands down my face and tried to control myself because I knew I had just fucked Krista, I wasn’t trying to be no nasty nigga but she was testing me.
She laughed. “Just horrible.” She pulled her skirt down and stood up. “I’ve got a meeting with a client in an hour so you, my dear, gotta go.”
She walked around the desk and escorted me to the door. When I got to the door I turned around and looked her in the eyes. My stare was so intense that she had to look away.
“You know I’m serious, right?”
“Bye Jaako.”
“You can say bye Jaako all you want but your ass was made for me and that’s where you’re gonna be so get ready.” I smirked and left out the door. I looked back to catch her looking at me with a faraway look in her eyes. I knew right then that she was thinking about what I said. Now I just needed to make sure that I made the right moves from here on out.
