It would be easy to let this derail me. If I stop to think about it for too long, I feel myself falling, dropping, sinking into that black hole again, and I’m not going to be a victim here too. I’m going to fight back. To stand up for myself. As long as my reserves hold up.
“Babe.” Skeet touches my cheek. “You okay?”
I offer him a small smile. “I’m okay. Just zoned out there for a bit.”
“You have your pain pills with you?”
“Yep.” I pat his arm. “I’m good. Thanks.”
“I missed you on my run this morning,” Axel says, leaning in to kiss my cheek, uncaring who might be watching. It’s something a good friend would do anyway.
“Yeah, I think I might be out of action for a few days.” Despite all my bravado, I can’t risk more serious injury by running when I’m so bruised and battered.
“It’s better to rest until you feel up to it.” He shoots daggers over my head at someone while he talks. I’m conscious of the myriad of eyeballs glued to my form, but I’m trying to forget they exist, vanquishing them to an imaginary otherworldly realm.
Heath threads his fingers in mine, eyeing me carefully. “Let’s do this.”
I keep my head up and my eyes straight ahead as we walk toward the entrance. Crowds of students stand around, pointing and whispering. A few brave—some might call them stupid—souls shout out insults. Skeet and Axel are all over them in a flash, and the insults die out. “One of us will be with you at all times,” Heath murmurs as we walk. “And you’re not to go anywhere by yourself. If you need to go to the toilet, hold it till the bell goes, and then one of us will escort you.”
It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell him that’s taking it a tad too far, but I stop myself. Because the truth is, it’s not an overreaction. I’ve been jumped more times in the girls’ bathroom than anyplace else. Some girls might think it’s weak to rely on my boyfriends for protection, but I think it’s the opposite. Only someone lacking a few brain cells would refuse every protection available. In Amber Springs, I had no choice but to go it alone. Here, I’m choosing to let my boyfriends help keep me safe, and that knowledge bolsters my confidence, assuring me I can ride this storm out.
I don’t want to leave Kentsville, and I’m sure it’s already on my parent’s agenda, so it’s in my interests to prove to them I can cope with this. That we are better off staying and facing the music than running again.
“Psycho bitch!” someone shouts, pushing me from behind.
Heath whirls around, keeping a tight hold of me as he prepares to tackle the culprit, but Axel has beaten him to it. He holds a scrawny-looking guy with glasses in a chokehold as he glares at him. The guy looks ready to pee his pants. “Want to say that again to Blaire’s face, you fucking coward?” Ax spits.
“I’m sorry.” He folds instantly, fear gripping his face. “I take it back.”
Ax shoves him off. “Stay away from Blaire, or the next time, you’ll get my fist in your face.” The guy doesn’t need to be told twice, racing away as if his life depends on it.
“Thank you,” I whisper, my heart surging with unnamed emotion. Ax just nods, and we set off again.
Heath curses when we reach my locker. It’s busted open, the contents destroyed. Die Bitch is spray painted on the botched door. “Ms. Simpson.” Principal Ivers comes up behind us. “Can you come with me for a few minutes.”
Heath walks with me while I wave a hasty goodbye to Axel and Skeet. The hallways are devoid of the usual chatter. Students move aside to let us pass, staring and whispering under their breath. Every stare is like a dagger thrown at my back, but I refuse to look at any of the bystanders.
“Get to class!” the principal snaps. “Anyone found loitering in the hall will be given detention.” The place empties in seconds, and a tiny layer of stress peels off my shoulders. What a pity I couldn’t hire the principal as my personal bodyguard. No one would dare approach me with her by my side.
In her office, she explains that she’s held a meeting with all the teachers, informing them of the situation and advising them to report any instances of abuse or victimization. She also asks my permission to make an announcement during first period. I’m touched she thought to ask me, and any ill will I’ve been nurturing over yesterday’s fiasco disappears. I’m also shocked to discover she was at my house last night, talking to my parents about how to handle the situation. It must’ve been while I was at Ax’s, or perhaps I was asleep by that stage. Either way, I’m glad she’s taking such a proactive response. It’s the direct opposite of how Amber Springs High dealt with the situation, and it’s good to know some adults are capable of acting like adults.
The hallways are empty as we hurry to class. Entering the room when everyone is already seated, and the class has commenced, isn’t ideal, but Heath refuses to let go of my hand until I’m securely in my seat. The teacher doesn’t even interfere when Heath forces the student at the desk behind me to move so he can sit with me. I keep my head down while the principal makes her statement over the communal speakers, advising all students of the punishment if they make any threats or physically harm me. Hushed whispers echo around the room, but no one approaches me directly, and I get through all my morning classes unscathed. I can deal with the venomous looks, the finger pointing, and the whispering once they physically leave me alone.
I have my first run in with Cassie during lunch in the cafeteria.
“I can’t believe you,” she fumes, hovering over our table and pointing her bony finger in Heath’s direction.
“Fuck off, Cassie,” Heath hisses. “No one wants you here.”
“How can you still choose her now that you know?”
I refuse to look up at her, quietly picking at my fruit salad, but I just know she’s got her hands on her hips and that her nostrils are flaring.
“I’ve always known,” Heath lies coolly. “And it makes no difference because Blaire hasn’t done anything wrong.”
“Your little plan backfired,” Axel adds with a wicked gleam in his eye. “And Heath has already told his parents everything.”
“He wouldn’t! You didn’t?!” Her panicked tone lifts my spirits no end.
“I did. My parents know it all. I expect my mom is probably telling your mom right this very second.”
She shrieks. “You fucking idiot! This is all going to blow up in your face.”
“Do I look like I care?” Heath glares at her before standing. He raises his voice, making sure everyone hears. “You’re going to regret that stunt you pulled yesterday. You’re a nasty, petty, vindictive, spoiled bitch, and I wouldn’t touch you if you were the last woman on Earth. Now get the fuck out of my face, and don’t ever come near me again.” Under his breath, for her ears only, he adds, “And if you think you’re going to get away with this, you’re as stupid as you look. I warned you. You have this coming.”
“Heath, please.” She tugs on his arm, and I pluck her hand off.
“Get your hands off my boyfriend, and go crawl back into that pit you came out of.”
“You think they can protect you?” she snarls in my ear. “Think again. You’re going to get what you deserve, murdering whore.” She pours her soda over my head, and I jump up, sticky brown liquid stinging my eyes, dripping down my face, and trickling under the collar of my shirt.
A teacher appears at our table with a stern expression on his face. “You need to come with me to the principal’s office, Ms. McFarland.”
“She provoked me!” she lies.
“Save it,” the teacher barks. “You’re in enough trouble as it is.”
Word is buzzing in the halls by the end of the day. Cassie has been suspended along with her crew for graffitiing the lockers and for the stunt she pulled at lunch. I know it’s only a temporary reprieve.
But I’ll take the wins wherever I can get them.
�
��Did you really tell your parents?” I ask Heath later that night when we’re at my house, studying. Jacinta insisted I finish my shift early which gave me some unexpected free time. We’ve a history test in the morning, and I thought Heath could use a last-minute go-over even if he is well prepared.
Only Mom is home. Dad is probably out drinking again. Mom let us study in my room, provided we keep the door open, so we’re currently lying on my bed with books sprawled out around us.
“I told them about the fake relationship and what really happened with her car, the night she drove drunk and landed in a ditch.” He lifts his head up. “I didn’t tell them about her coke habit. Thought it was wise to hold something back to dangle over her head. I don’t trust her not to pull more shit.”
That’s a smart move, and I don’t trust her either. “How did it go down?”
“About as well as you’d expect,” he says, returning his focus to his books.
I tap his back. “Please look at me.” He raises his eyes to meet mine. “No more secrets,” I say, ignoring the way my pulse spikes.
“My mom’s a snob, Blaire.”
“Meaning she still wants me nowhere near you and thinks Cassie did the community a favor by outing our true identities.”
He tweaks my nose. “Still razor sharp.” I roll my eyes. “Yeah, that about sums it up. My dad was actually sympathetic, and he told me he’s glad I’ve ditched the bitch. He said he never wanted me saddled with someone like that.”
“You sound surprised.”
“I am. I always thought Dad bought into the notion of Cassie and me as much as Mom, but I’m beginning to see it was all Mom’s idea.”
“So, he won’t withhold your trust fund?” I twist on my side, anxiety bubbling to the surface again.
“Oh, Mom’s threatening it, but Dad told me he’d handle her. Besides, I secured a full ride, so I’m covered either way.”
“You did?”
“Yep. Seems there isn’t much they won’t do for their next potential star player.” He puffs out his chest, and a smile graces my lips.
“Wow. Someone’s got a healthy ego.”
He pecks my lips. “Sometimes you’ve just got to own that shit.” We grin at one another. “What about you?”
“What about me?” I ask, wondering what he means.
“Have you thought about college?”
I flip over onto my stomach. “My parents had to dip into my college fund, and with everything going on, I haven’t given it much thought. I don’t even know where I’ll be living after graduation, so it’s hard to make any concrete plans.”
Heath flips me over onto my back, hovering over me. “Come with us to UF.”
“What?” I splutter.
A lopsided grin appears on his face. “We talked about it. We want you there with us.”
“Why?”
“Why?” Incredulity creeps into his town. “Because you’re our girlfriend and we lo—we want you by our side.”
I know what he was going to say, and my heart is ready to burst. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to be the first to openly acknowledge my feelings either. “I care about you guys too,” I whisper, “and I’d love nothing more than to go to UF with you, but I don’t see how. I’ve probably missed the deadline, and unless I got a scholarship…”
“It’s not too late to apply, but you have to make up your mind soon. The priority application deadline has passed, but you have until March first to apply on a space-available basis. I can talk to the coach, see if he can do anything to help.”
“I don’t know, Heath.” Could I seriously consider this? The thought of going to college with all of them seems like a far-fetched dream that’s way out of reach, but maybe I’m being pessimistic.
“Promise you’ll think about it?”
“I promise.” Leaning in, I distract him with a kiss, and soon, studying and future college plans are the furthest things from both our minds.
Chapter Thirty-One
Jacinta lets me leave the store a little earlier on Saturday so I can get ready with Shaznay at the Taylors’ house. Skeet’s band is playing at a local bar, and we’re all going to support him. “This would look fab on you,” Shaz suggests, holding up a black silky jumpsuit that is cut indecently low at the front and dips down at the back.
“Maybe, but I’m not showcasing my bruises for the whole town to see.” I’m already a little antsy about the night, but at least I’ll be protected with my guys, my best friend, and Skeet’s parents who will all be there.
“Shit, sorry, forgot.”
“It’s fine.” I pull the short green lace dress out of my bag. “Jacinta loaned me this to wear.” The dress has a high, round neck and it’s fully covered at the back. But the sleeves are sheer lace, and it stops a good couple inches above my knee, placing all the focus on my—bruise-free—legs.
“Oh, wow.” She fingers the dress. “That will look stunning with your height and your coloring. The guys won’t know what’s hit them.”
We’re both dressed, sitting side by side in front of the mirror applying our makeup when she starts her subtle interrogation. “How are things at home? Please tell me your parents have given up on the idea of moving?”
“They have. For now. While it’s tempting to run, we all agree it’s probably pointless.” I press my lips together until my lipstick dries. “In hindsight, it was foolish to think we could hide who we are, and we can’t run every time someone finds out. It’s exhausting. But it’ll all depend on how things go. I know there are people at school waiting to pounce as soon as I’m unprotected, the minute they feel they can take action and get away with it.”
“Then just make sure you’re always with the guys. It’s only for another few months anyway, and then you’ll all be going off to college.”
I fumble my eyeliner at her words. “Skeet talked to you about that?” I haven’t even spoken to Skeet about it.
“He might’ve mentioned something. Shoot. Was I not supposed to say anything?” Her worried eyes meet mine.
“No, it’s not that. It’s just Heath only recently mentioned it to me, and I honestly don’t see how it’s going to be possible.”
“Don’t you want to go with them?”
“I want to be with them, but this is a big decision, and I don’t want to rush into it either, but time is running out.” I swivel on my seat facing her. “I always thought I’d be attending college with Ethan. It’s just another bittersweet moment.”
“God, Blaire, I hate everything you’re going through. It’s so unfair. I can’t imagine losing Skeet. Especially like that. It’d kill me.”
“It very nearly did,” I admit. “My parents are the only reason I didn’t seriously contemplate taking my own life.”
She whacks me in the arm. “Don’t you ever say or think that!” Tears pool in her eyes. “I hate that you’re hurting, but suicide is never the answer. Think about what it’d do to my brother and me. And Axel and Heath, as well as your parents and your aunt and uncle.”
I hug her. “Shaz, relax. I never seriously considered it, okay, but I was depressed.”
I still am.
“Life was shitty, and I was missing my brother, but ending it all would mean he died in vain.”
“What do you mean?” Her brow furrows.
I quell the panic waiting to rise to the surface. “Just that Ethan believed he was leaving me in a good place, and it’d be like making a mockery of that,” I lie, relieved when she seems to buy it.
I want to tell her the rest of the story. I really do. But then I’d be going against Ethan’s last wishes, and I can’t do that even if I disagree, in part, with his thinking. Besides, it’s too late now. The time for opening that can of worms has long since passed.
“Wow.” Skeet whistles as I step into the kitchen, and a faint blush stains my cheeks. His e
ntire family is here, and I hate being the center of attention. Not that they seem to mind. Skeet reels me into his arms, pressing a barely there kiss to my lips in front of all of them. His mom smiles while the rest of his family continues their conversation as if this PDA isn’t happening in the vicinity. “Don’t want to ruin your lip gloss,” he whispers into my ear. “I’d love nothing more than to cancel tonight and lock you downstairs with me.” His hand skims low on my back, and he presses me in closer. “Feel that?” he murmurs, planting a feather-soft kiss on my neck while discreetly pushing his erection against my stomach. “That’s what you do to me. All the damn time.”
“Oh my God,” I whisper back. “You can’t say that to me in front of your family!”
He chuckles. “They can’t hear. Besides, my parents are all about the PDAs. They’re probably mentally high-fiving me right now.”
“Are you nervous?” I ask, deliberately switching to safer topics.
“A little.” He tilts my chin up and his eyes shine with unnamed emotion. “I’m debuting a new song tonight, and that always gives me the jitters.”
“I’m sure it’s amazing. You know I love your original stuff.”
He kisses the tip of my nose. “You’re probably biased.”
“No way.” I shake my head. “If you sucked monkey balls, I’d tell you.”
He barks out a laugh as his dad Liam plants a hand on his shoulder. “Ready. stud?”
“As I’ll ever be.” Skeet winks at me, entwining our hands and leading me outside.
The venue is packed when we arrive, and there’s limited standing room. Thankfully, Skeet’s mom had already reserved an area at the front, just off to the side, of the stage. Skeet gives me a sly kiss on the lips before disappearing backstage with his dad and the rest of the band. Ax and Heath are already seated, and Ax pats the empty stool beside him. I hop up, and Shaz claims the stool the other side of me.
Surviving Amber Springs: A Stand-Alone Contemporary Romance Page 23
