by Kait Nolan
Though she didn’t need it, he reached out a hand to steady her back on the way down, just because he wanted to touch her. “Aren’t you, kind of?”
“I’m bailing for me. You’re a massive side benefit.” Rising to her toes she popped up to kiss him.
When she would have pulled away, he banded an arm around her waist, hauling her in for a better taste. In a quicksilver flash, sweet turned to heat. Sebastian groaned as her mouth opened readily under his. Maybe they could squeeze in a quickie in the tack room.
At the sound of tires on gravel, they both froze before springing apart like guilty teenagers. The horse blocked them from view, but Laurel took a big step back from him. “Quick, do I look like I’ve just been kissed?”
Color rode high in her cheeks and her lips were red and a little swollen. “Uh…”
“Damn it. Stall them.” She ducked away and went to finish cooling off Ginger. Or maybe herself.
Not having a horse in hand himself to delay the inevitable, he scrubbed a palm over his face and slipped back through the rails, crossing to where Athena’s car had parked by the house. She and Logan spilled out, looking relaxed and happy, with a honeymoon glow he could see from twenty feet away.
Logan lifted his hand in a wave. “How are things?”
“Good.”
“Any problems while we were away?”
“Nothing I’d call a problem.”
“Uh, what is that?”
Sebastian followed Athena’s gaze to where the rescued tom was curled at the edge of the porch, tail twitching with suspicion. “Oh, that’s Mr. Rochester.”
She went brows up. “Didn’t realize you were a Jane Eyre fan.”
“I’m not. Laurel is. She’s the one who brought him home and named him. He came with the new horse.”
“We got a new horse?” Logan asked. “Did we have room for another one?”
Sebastian rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, about that…”
Laurel bounded over. “You’re home! Sorry, I had to finish cooling Ginger from her workout.” She threw her arms around her brother.
Logan squeezed her back, lifting her clear off her feet before setting her down and holding her at arm’s length, searching her face. “You look better. Really good, actually. I’d say time on the farm has been good for you.”
“So very good.” Would her brother recognize the sappy, happy smile for what it was?
Logan’s gaze shifted to Sebastian. Shit. A rare bout of nerves began to dance in his belly. Logan had left Laurel in his care, not in his bed.
She stepped into the awkward silence with enthusiasm. “I got to ride nearly every day, and Sebastian’s let me work on training with some of the horses that are further along. It’s been amazing. And you won’t believe it, but I actually read a book for fun. I haven’t had time to do that since I started law school.”
Logan held Sebastian’s gaze a moment longer before turning back to his sister. “And you apparently acquired a cat?”
“Well we couldn’t just leave him. He’s Maestro’s barn buddy.”
“Maestro?”
“The new arrival,” Sebastian explained. “We’ll tell you all about him once you’re settled.”
Athena scowled. “Guh, there’s no time to get settled. We still have to decorate. Why did we think it was a good idea to get married so close to Christmas and then host? I’m hoping I can sweet-talk my sisters into coming over to help. If we have the Reynolds army, it won’t be so bad.”
Laurel bit her lip. “Actually, we already decorated.”
“You did?” Logan asked.
“Yeah. I didn’t think you’d want to have to rush to do that when you got back. And I bought you a bunch of cool ornaments from the holiday bazaar as a wedding present. I mean, we could easily do more if you want, but the tree’s up and there’s greenery all over the place, so the basics are done—ooph!”
Athena yanked Laurel into a hard hug. “That is the best Christmas present you could give me. Your mother intimidates the hell out of me.”
Laughing, Laurel squeezed her back. “Aren’t you supposed to be a badass and all?”
“I am in most areas, but I’d just as soon not get off on the wrong foot from the very beginning with my new mother-in-law.”
“Glad I could help. I know it’s stressful being the ones to host Christmas, and I want this to be as…peaceful as it can be.”
Logan eyed her. “That sounds ominous.”
Sebastian waited, wondering if she was going to tell her brother she’d decided against being a lawyer. But Laurel just shrugged. “I’d like to avoid a repeat of your rehearsal dinner. Dad doesn’t have a filter anymore, and he shouldn’t pull that shit in your home.”
He tweaked her ponytail. “You don’t have to be the mediator, Pip.”
“Someone has to.”
The pause went on too long, belying the joking tone. This probably wasn’t the time or place for the discussion that needed to happen, so Sebastian stepped in. “I expect y’all are tired and would like to go on in and get settled. Let us help you with your luggage.”
Athena linked arms with Laurel. “You boys handle that. We’re gonna talk menu.”
Suddenly alone with Logan, Sebastian reached into the trunk. “So how was Oregon?”
He straightened, suitcase in hand, to find Logan studying him with that neutral therapist gaze. Somehow the total lack of judgment in his expression felt like an indictment. It took all Sebastian’s training not to fidget or fill the silence.
“You’re good for her. I knew you would be.”
Wait, what?
His confusion must’ve showed because Logan laughed. “A blind man could see the connection between you at our wedding. I’m not blind. Glad my plan for nature to take its course worked out.”
Sebastian stared. “You set us up?”
“Let’s just say I facilitated.”
“Why?”
“Because you see her. In the middle of that shitshow my dad pulled at the rehearsal dinner, you made sure she was okay. She puts up a good front, but she hasn’t been okay for a really long time. You’re the first thing in a decade to crack that mask and make her even think of slowing down. I figured if anybody could get through to her, it would be you. All signs point to me being right.”
Uncomfortable with his astute observations, Sebastian rubbed the back of his neck. “You’re really okay with me being involved with your baby sister?”
“You’re one of the best men I know, and you look at her like she hung the moon. Why wouldn’t I be?” Logan dragged the other suitcase out of the trunk. “C’mon. I figure my wife can be induced to make food. She’s been missing her kitchen.”
Laurel’s parents were arriving any minute. Because she wanted to reach for the antacids in her purse, she headed out to the barn instead, hoping to find Sebastian. Her own chores had already been finished an hour ago, courtesy of the fact that she’d woken even before the rooster began to crow. The only reason she knew she’d slept at all was the stress nightmare she’d jerked out of in a cold sweat. First one in two weeks. Except instead of the usual nightmare about being literally caged at a high-powered law firm, this time she’d dreamed she told her parents her decision and been cut off from the family. Given the imminent possibility of that reality, she hadn’t been able to do more than choke down coffee.
She found Sebastian in the tack room. Knowing Logan was up at the house, cleaning up, she walked straight into his arms, burying her face against his chest and burrowing in.
“Hey now. What’s all this?” He cuddled her close, his familiar scent of leather and horse settling over her in a blanket of comfort.
“Missed you.”
“You saw me this morning.” She could hear the amusement in his tone.
“I missed you last night. Apparently, I can’t sleep without you anymore.”
“My bed did feel awfully empty.” He tipped her chin up, searching her face. “Bad dreams?”
�
��Yeah.” Through the little window past his shoulder, Laurel could just see her parents’ car pulling up in front of the farmhouse. “They’re here.”
Sebastian brushed a soft kiss over her lips. “You’ve got this. And you’ve got me.”
Laurel dredged up a smile. “That’s getting me through all of this.” Squaring her shoulders, she pulled on the armor that had been second nature most of her adult life, surprised to find it didn’t fit as comfortably as it had two weeks ago. “Into the breach.”
“Good luck.”
At the tack room door she paused. “I know you have a lot of work probably, but if you want to pop in for snacks in a bit, Athena’s put together a bunch of appetizers, and I think Logan’s making cocktails.”
Sebastian’s smile spread slow and easy. “I was just finishing up. Let me go grab a shower, and I’ll join y’all in a bit.”
Pitifully relieved, she blew him a kiss and went to meet her parents.
Athena was already greeting them, giving Rosalind an awkward hug. “Logan will be down shortly. He’s just getting cleaned up.”
“Hey y’all!” Laurel called.
“There’s my girl!” her father boomed, pulling her into a hug.
Laurel gave him a squeeze. “How was the drive? Y’all made good time.”
“We did.” Stepping back, he surveyed her from head to toe. “You look kind of a mess, don’t you?”
Resisting the urge to smooth down her hair, Laurel fought not to grind her teeth. Since she hadn’t planned on being here for two weeks when she packed, the jeans, sweater, and no makeup had been her uniform. “I’ve been on vacation, dad. The dogs and horses don’t care how I look.”
Rosalind pulled her in for a hug as well. “I think you look more relaxed and that the quiet time was good for you.”
“It was, thanks.”
“Well, I hope you didn’t play the whole time. You won’t get this kind of uninterrupted time to study for the bar when you get back to school for spring semester.”
Laurel’s stomach clutched. God forbid I do something other than work my ass off. “I’ll find a way to juggle everything. I always have.”
“That’s my girl.”
Praying for patience, she followed everyone inside.
Logan came down, hair still wet from the shower. There was another flurry of hugs and handshakes, then Athena none-too-subtly herded them out of the kitchen and into the living room.
Rosalind’s gaze swept the space, lingering on the Frasier fir. “Oh, the tree really fits the whole country farmhouse aesthetic.”
This time Laurel lost the fight to not grit her teeth.
Athena slid her arm around Logan’s waist. “Thanks! We really love it.”
Knowing the remark was really for her benefit, Laurel shot her sister-in-law a grateful smile.
Logan waded into the lull. “We weren’t sure whether you stopped on the road or not, but Athena’s made some appetizers, and I thought we could all do with some celebratory cocktails.”
“That sounds lovely,” Rosalind assured him.
Her brother took orders and Laurel helped Athena bring in the trays of canapés. As everyone settled in around the living room, conversation turned to Logan and Athena’s honeymoon in Oregon. Sebastian came in at the tail end of a description of the amenities of the resort.
“Oh good, you made it.” Logan flashed a grin. “You would not believe the stables of this place. They looked like something out of Rich Horseman’s Quarterly.”
Sebastian plucked a slice of bruschetta off a tray. “Oh, I’d believe it. I saw plenty of that growing up in Kentucky. A lot of those horses live better than most people.”
“You’re from Kentucky?” Rosalind asked.
“Yes, ma’am. I grew up around some of the best Thoroughbreds in the country.” Snagging a small handful of the spiced, roasted nuts, he wandered over and took up position beside Laurel’s chair. She instantly felt better.
Of course her father wasn’t content to let the conversation stay on anyone else for long. “I spoke to Roger Pike yesterday. Why haven’t you called him back to formally accept the job in New York?”
The mac and cheese bite turned to ash on her tongue. Laurel swallowed, washing it down with a sip of her wine. Now was the moment to speak up. To finally be honest for once. But she just…couldn’t. The whole situation had turned into Mount Vesuvius when Logan did it. She wasn’t looking forward to a repeat.
She and Sebastian had put off discussing a timeline until they could go over the whole idea for the center with her brother. She’d agreed because she wanted the rest of the details worked out before she even broached the topic with her parents, so she could tell them rather than sound like she was asking for permission. But that whole conversation was so big, and she hadn’t felt right hitting Logan up with it the moment he got home from his honeymoon. Maybe she ought to wait until after Christmas, so as not to spoil the actual holiday. There was no reason for Athena and Logan to be subjected to her father’s wrath, and it was only another two days.
“Because it’s Christmas, for one. And that aside, I don’t know if I’m going to accept the job.”
Her father’s brow drew down into a forbidding scowl that would have intimidated a witness on the stand “What do you mean you don’t know if you’re going to accept the job? Of course you’re going to accept it. It’s an excellent opportunity. It’s—”
Laurel interrupted, drawing on the poise that had been drummed into her practically from birth. “I’m at the top of my class. Carson, Danvers, Herbert, and Pike will not be my only offer. You can’t expect me to jump at the first thing that comes up, no matter how amazing, without seeing what else is out there. That’s hardly responsible decision making.”
Her dad stared for a long time, as if he could see into her. How many defendants had simply spilled their guts under this gaze? “You have your sights set on something else?”
Laurel sensed Sebastian edging closer. She could give this piece of truth. “I do.”
Lawrence broke into a wide grin. “You’re going for number one.”
Of course he would think that. Unwilling to drop the bomb that would destroy the tenuous peace, she sipped at her wine. “I’m keeping my options open.” It wasn’t an outright lie, but it still made her stomach roil to know what she was putting off.
“That’s my girl. Hold out for the best.”
The best for me, at least. “I’ve got time to make a decision. There’s still my last semester to get through.”
“Of course, of course. What are you taking this spring?”
It was natural to talk about heading back, what classes she’d be taking, which professors she was excited about. There was relief in not having to lie about that. Much as she didn’t want to be a lawyer, she’d actually enjoyed most of law school. She liked learning, and she’d been waiting for years to take a couple of these classes. It wouldn’t be a hardship to take the time and finish. Without the pressure of the job decision hanging over her head, she could simply enjoy the learning process.
Didn’t that make the most sense? It was one semester and then she’d have her degree, just in case. Whether she ever used it formally or not, surely having those credentials would be beneficial when looking to woo prospective sponsors for the equine therapy center. She wouldn’t feel quite so much like she’d wasted all those years, all that effort, and she’d theoretically catch less flack from her parents than if she walked away this close to the end. There was a part of her—a big part—that eased at that idea. If she finished, she wouldn’t be making a prospectively irrevocable mistake, and she’d know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was making the right decision about the rest of her life.
The calm Sebastian habitually wore like a cloak evaporated, and his hands curled to fists before he forced them to relax.
She was going back to school. Going back on everything she’d said. When push came to shove, when it was time for her to actually stand up for herself and
confront her father, she couldn’t escape conditioning. All her talk about the therapy program, about expansion, research, and funding, was nothing more than Laurel spinning dreams so she wouldn’t have to think about going back to school. But clearly, even if she didn’t want the law, she wanted her parents’ approval more than she wanted their dream. She was leaving, exactly as he’d known she would.
He couldn’t stay here, couldn’t just act like everything was fine and she hadn’t just ripped his heart out. Fixing what he hoped was a neutral expression on his face, he interrupted. “I’m sorry, I need to slip out and take care of some things with the horses. Mr. and Mrs. Maxwell, it was nice to see you again. Athena, thanks for the snacks.”
Did they hear the edge to his voice?
Laurel certainly did. He could feel her eyes on him, her worry a palpable thing, but he didn’t look at her. Couldn’t and maintain his tenuous control. He was out of the house and headed for the barn before his temper could boil over.
He’d known. From day one, he’d known this would happen. He’d known getting involved with her was a bad idea, but he’d let himself believe, let himself hope, that this time—with her—it would be different. That this time, he would be enough. But, of course, he wasn’t. He never had been. The whole thing had been a fantasy for her, not something real. Not the way it was for him. He’d been a damned fool for investing in it, in her. She’d promised she’d stay, and at the first test, she immediately flipped her position. How could he take anything she said at face value?
Laurel cornered him in the barn. “What’s wrong?”
He didn’t even try to dial back the temper, didn’t have it in him to try to cobble together some more control. “What’s wrong? What’s wrong? Are you kidding me right now?”
“I’m really not. What are you so angry about?” How could she stand there looking so fucking calm?
“You. This whole time you’ve been paying lip service to the idea of making a change, making a new choice, choosing something else. Choosing me. And the moment you have to confront the reality of doing the hard thing—the thing you claimed to want, you back down.”
