Friends vs. Family

by C. L. Stone

  “We can’t. We’re supposed to stay out of trouble, remember?”

  Luke blew out a puff of air from between his lips. He shifted, wrapping an arm around my waist and tugging me. I slipped into his lap. He pressed his cheek to my forehead. “Sang, you can’t let yourself get walked over like this. They stole your clothes.”

  “What choice do I have?” I whispered to him, staring absently at my knees.

  He sighed, brushing his fingertips over the outside of my thigh as he held me. “I wish I knew. She can’t do this to you. She’s taking advantage of you.”

  “If I went to our mom, she’d get into trouble, too,” I said.

  “Would she?” he asked. He drew his head back, gazing down into my face. “Do you remember the last time your mother even talked to your sister? Or even asked about her?”

  I blinked, unsure. “I don’t know. She does that sometimes.”

  “When is the last time you saw your sister on her knees?”

  I tried to recall but my mind was hazy. After learning my clothes were gone and after the crazy day we’d had, it was hard to concentrate. “I don’t remember.”

  “Or maybe it’s been a really long time, long enough for your memory to fade?” he asked. “Sweetie, you’ve gotten how much done to you in the few weeks that I’ve known you, and Marie hasn’t once been called out for anything. You thought you went unnoticed at school before? Your sister is invisible here.”

  Was that true? If it was, how did that happen? How did I not notice? I thought perhaps maybe it did happen to her and I was gone when it happened. She never looked surprised when she saw me on my knees or on the stool or in any of the other punishments over the years. My father was never there to acknowledge either of us... but then he told me about going on his business trips, didn’t he? And my mother shouted for me instead of Marie when she needed something or wanted to check on us. Did they forget about her?

  “She might not get the punishments you get,” Luke continued, smoothing a fingertip over my knee. “But that’s no excuse to take advantage of her own sister. I want to feel sorry for her, but I can’t right now.”

  I made a small noise from my throat, frustrated, confused. “There’s nothing else to do,” I said. “She got what she wanted, I guess. She traded Danielle for clothes, and I’ve got the leftovers.” I wanted to stop talking about problems I couldn’t fix. The overhanging questions about why she was invisible in the house and why I was sought out for exotic, unusual punishments wasn’t something I was ready to look at. “I’ll find something I can work with.”

  Luke sighed and let me go. I crawled off of his lap, returning my attention to the pile on the bed. I found the smallest pair of jeans I could find, measured out the length. I found a pair of scissors to cut them into shorts.

  I picked out the smallest t-shirt. It looked like a boy’s shirt. Other jeans and shirts looked like old boy clothes. Something told me some of these belonged to Derrick.

  I thought about washing the clothes I was wearing, but the shorts were too short for school regulations. The shirt, maybe. What else would I wear later? I couldn’t go to school wearing the same two pairs of shorts and shirts.

  Luke remained quiet on the bed as I fiddled with the clothes. I discarded items that were too big for me. He folded those pieces carefully and set them aside. “I could go get your clothes,” he said softly.

  I blinked at him, my eyes tracing over the gentle angles of his face, the way his smooth lips twitched down at the corners. “How?”

  His dark eyes met mine. His normal, happy disposition was gone, replaced by something cold. “I’ll take them back.”

  The way he said it made my heart stop. I don’t know how it occurred to me, but in my mind, I envisioned Luke sneaking into Danielle’s house and stealing the clothes. He was quiet on his feet, sneaking around my own house. Did he think he could do it at Danielle’s without anyone noticing? Was that what he meant?

  The clothing I held slipped from my fingers to the floor. I stumbled toward him, closing the distance between us. I dropped my arms around his neck and buried my face into his shoulder. He leaned back, as if surprised at my sudden hug.

  I couldn’t stand to see his eyes like that. I couldn’t take it if he got caught stealing from Danielle’s house. Then he’d really get into trouble. “Don’t do it,” I begged him. “Please.”

  His palm drifted to rest at the small of my back. “I want to. You can’t wear these to school, Sang.”

  I squeezed my arms around his neck. “No,” I whispered. “Don’t. Please.”

  “I really should. She deserves it.”

  Was he asking or was he telling me he was going to and wanted me to tell him I was okay with it? My mine flared for something to say to him, anything to get him to change his mind. “I’ll... I’ll never talk to you again if you try.” It was a weak threat and I would never mean it. How immature was I? Only I didn’t have anything else. What could I really do if he did run off and attempted to steal them back?

  The moment the words slipped from my mouth, he stiffened against me. His other hand clutched my back and he pulled me against him harder than ever before. “Sang, don’t you dare.”

  I realized my mistake. North didn’t talk to him when he arrived at their doorstep years ago. I was threatening him with almost the same thing, with not talking to him. He didn’t like it. He didn’t know I couldn’t really stop. Could I ever really stop talking to someone so sweet?

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered. “No more trouble. Okay? I’ll wear what I have. We’ll figure it out. Let’s get through Friday.”

  He pushed his forehead to my shoulder, breathing in against me. Locks of his hair tickled my neck. “If you don’t want me to, I won’t.”

  “Don’t,” I said.

  He nodded against shoulder, pulling back, frowning. “Maybe we should call Gabriel,” he said.

  “Let’s not worry about it tonight,” I said. I reflected on how tired Gabriel looked. He was the one that really needed sleep. The last thing he needed was to stress out about what I was wearing to school. “We’ll go to school, we’ll tell them all about it and we’ll figure it out. Maybe we can talk to Danielle. We’ll do it tomorrow when we’re calmer. Maybe she didn’t realize the clothes she took were mine or the ones she gave me would be too big for me.”

  Luke’s eyes became lost in shadows. “I don’t think she was thinking of you at all.”

  I sighed, letting go of him to push the collection of clothes off of my bed. I padded over to the light switch to turn the overhead lights off. I didn’t want to think about it anymore.

  He seemed to understand me. He fell into the bed on top of the blanket, kicking his shoes off. I crawled in next to him. He wrapped his arms around me, hugging me close and pressing his face to my hair, my silent guardian for the night. I knew we weren’t supposed to. He was supposed to sleep in the attic. That night, I didn’t care. I hid my face in his chest.

  We dared anyone to walk in on us, discover us and cause a scene. If my mother only knew, if she ever came after me when she learned the truth, everything would change. Now my sister was on the verge and could easily tip over this delicate cup to expose me and the boys. And Danielle, a girl that I’d never once said a word to yet, was leading the way to our own destruction in a silent war she would never understand.

  Luke knew. I knew. This was no longer us waiting things out until it calmed over. This was us counting down the moments, waiting for the time bomb to go off.

  How to dress a Girl

  I dreamed of tiny green bugs slipping into my window. Thousands of them crept into my bed, smothering me.

  A buzzing shocked me out of the dream. Luke grumbled next to me in the bed, his head stuffed against my shoulder. He pulled his arm from around me, reached into his back pocket and put the phone to his ear. “What?” he asked without looking at who it was calling. He was quiet to listen. In a second, he yanked himself away from me, sitting up on the bed and rubbing his f
ace. “Sorry,” he said. “Sorry. We’ll be right there.” He jabbed his thumb at the phone and turned to me. “Sang, we’re late.”

  I jolted to a standing position. Late! How late? What was late? My foggy brain mushed into my neck. I hovered on the carpet, trying to pull myself together and figure out what I was supposed to do next.

  Luke was on top of it. He grabbed the clothes I’d picked out and tossed them to me. “Wash up, but don’t take a full shower,” he said. “Get dressed and meet me outside. Don’t worry about your bags. I’ve got it.”

  I dashed to the bathroom to wash, especially my legs, and they looked better. I put on the newly made shorts. They were beige jeans, and at least they were clean. The baggy t-shirt, covered my butt, a faded blue color and advertised a band I didn’t know.

  When I opened the bathroom door, my sandals were in the hallway. I wanted to scold Luke later for risking sneaking out to leave them there for me but I knew I would forget. I slipped them onto my feet, taking the back stairs and dashing out into the garage.

  Luke was waiting in the drive, a clean white shirt in place and he was stuffing his blazer on. I took my violin case and he grabbed our book bags and we ran for Kota’s.

  I kept having to hike up the shorts as they felt like they were about to fall off. I was hanging my head, watching my feet. Luke jogged ahead of me. It was already warm and sticky. How did we sleep in?

  Nathan and Kota were already waiting out in front of Kota’s drive. Derrick stood with them talking. I was just opening my mouth to say hello when I noticed Marie and Danielle standing together and my mouth dropped open. Luke slowed down to fall next to me, his eyes catching where mine went.

  Danielle was wearing one of my own dark skirts and Luke’s blue button up shirt on top. Since she was long legged and her hips were wider than mine, the skirt looked more like a mini-skirt, barely covering her hips. The shirt was unbuttoned at her stomach, so on occasion it flew open to reveal her pale stomach. She had the buttons at her chest undone until her cleavage was exposed. She was smirking as she chatted with Marie, wearing large sunglasses that covered half of her face.

  Marie was in jeans again, but she was wearing Nathan’s shirt.

  Kota’s eyes fell on me. “What’s wrong, Sang?” he asked.

  “What are you wearing?” Nathan asked, his head tilting. “What’s with the t-shirt?”

  Derrick gazed at my shirt, looking puzzled. “I think I have a shirt like that.”

  “I think it is your shirt,” I said, closing the gap between us to stand closer so I wouldn’t be overheard by Danielle or Marie. “My sister traded clothes with Danielle last night.”

  Derrick’s tan cheeks tinted. “I was wondering where she got the skirt. I told her it’s too small.”

  “Danielle’s going to get into trouble at school,” Kota said, touching the bridge of his glasses with his finger. A displeased frown formed on his face. “There’s no way the teachers will let her stay. She’s way out of regulation.”

  “She took all of her clothes,” Luke said. “All those blouses and skirts, and left Sang with barely anything. She tried on all of it. What’s she’s wearing now was the closest in size and it barely fits.”

  “Hey,” Nathan said, his blue eyes fixed on Marie. “Isn’t that my...” He turned, squaring off his shoulders.

  I grabbed Nathan by his arm. The girls had started to notice we were looking at them. “Yes,” I said through my teeth. “And that blue shirt Danielle’s wearing is Luke’s. Don’t say anything. If we make a big deal about it...”

  “I don’t give a fuck,” Nathan said. “I didn’t give that to her.” His fists clenched and he started across the drive.

  “I’ll get it back,” I said, stepping in front of him. Out of desperation, I pressed a hand to his chest. This seemed to distract him and he looked down at me. “Give me time. If we tell her it’s yours, or if we try to force this, Marie could tell my mother things we don’t want her to know.”

  He narrowed his eyes at the two of them but they seemed disinterested. His jaw set, his glare crushing. He grabbed my hand from his chest, holding on to it as he turned away. It felt like his squeezing my hand held back the fury bubbling under the surface. Did he feel so strongly about that shirt? I didn’t realize. I vowed to steal it back and hide it the first chance I had. If he liked it, I’d give it back. I wouldn’t want it ruined or held over our heads by Marie.

  Kota stepped up next to us. “They didn’t leave you anything?”

  “Just a bunch of jeans and t-shirts,” I said.

  Luke followed, dropping our things at his feet and straightening out his hurriedly put together clothes. Derrick stepped up next to him, looking uncomfortable and out of place.

  “I’ll try to bring them back so you can go through them,” I told Derrick. “I’m sorry about this.”

  He shrugged. “That shirt was old anyway. I don’t think it fits any more.”

  “Can’t you do something about her?” Nathan asked. “She’s your sister.”

  “I don’t know. I’ll try talking to her.” He kept looking over at his sister, maybe wishing he had stuck with talking to them. He seemed nonplussed about it.

  I hooked fingers into the jean shorts and readjusted them on my hips. “We’ll get through today and figure it out later.”

  “Do we have time to change?” Nathan asked. He looked to Kota. “Can’t we get something for her? Does Jessica have...?”

  The school bus turned the corner, heading in our direction.

  “No time,” Kota said. He fished his cell phone out of his pocket. “Maybe if we catch the guys before they leave.”

  When the bus got there, I fell into the seat next to Kota and Nathan slid in next to me. Luke fell into the seat next to us. Derrick trailed to the back, not sitting near his sister and not sitting close enough to us to be considered ‘with’ us. I found it strange. The guys may not have been openly popular, but they were good looking and nice and dressed well. They seemed to get along well with one another. Why did it feel like Derrick didn’t really want to be associated with them in public?

  At the school, Kota, Nathan, Luke and I were the last to get off the bus. We trailed Marie and Danielle out of curiosity. Boys hooted the moment Danielle walked into the crowded cafeteria. She stared ahead with a scowling smirk and swinging her hips a little more. Marie crushed her books to her chest, looking out of place next to Danielle in her t-shirt and jeans.

  “Oh yeah,” Nathan mumbled next to me. “Holler at the girl who doesn’t know what dress size she is.”

  Kota checked his phone again. “Let’s get out to the parking lot,” he said. “Gabriel says to meet them at Victor’s car.”

  Nathan took the violin case from me. I followed after Kota, putting my hand on my hip so I wouldn’t lose the shorts on the way out. When I was falling behind them because of how I had to walk to keep the shorts up, Kota came back for me. With his cheeks tinted, he wrapped an arm around my waist, hooking his thumb into the belt loop and hanging his hand on my hip. We walked together like this, trying to look casual together. I think I was blushing more at feeling his hand on my waist than I was about the clothes I was wearing. Still, I felt so out of place next to them in their nice slacks and shirts with ties.

  Cars were still pulling into the lot and we had to make a slow crawl toward the back where Victor had parked his BMW. Victor and Gabriel were leaning against the car’s trunk waiting for us as we approached. Gabriel looked intense but the shadows under his eyes were gone. I was happy Luke and I didn’t bug him last night. At least he got some sleep.

  “Oh my god,” Gabriel said, his bright blue eyes sliding down my clothes. “You weren’t kidding.”

  “Can you help?” Kota asked.

  He nodded. He curled his fingers at me and then had me spin a little in front of him. “Motherfucker. Alright, hang on.”

  He opened the passenger side door and took a seat with his legs stretched out. He pulled me by the hips until my wais
t was eye level with him. “Okay, you guys make a barrier. I don’t want anyone thinking I’m molesting her.”

  I blushed and watched the guys crowd themselves together to make a wall. With the car door open, I was blocked on the other side, too. Gabriel reached for his book bag and pulled out a pair of scissors. He started cutting at the shorts, hooking his fingers up into them, pulling at the crotch a little to straighten it out.

  A wave of heat washed over me. “Gabriel...”

  “Just give me a minute,” he said. “I’m going to make this into a skirt. It’ll still look like shit but it’ll be less shit. And why the hell did Danielle steal your clothes?”

  “Attention,” Kota said. “And she got it.”

  “Fucking ugly,” Nathan said.

  Luke’s lips twisted, frowning and staring out into the parking lot.

  Victor stood sentinel with his arms crossed over his chest. His fire eyes blazed. “Why don’t I just go get her something?”

  “We don’t have time,” Kota said. “The closest store is a Wal-Mart and you won’t make it back by the first bell.”

  “That’s what we’re doing this weekend,” Victor said. “I’m taking her for clothes.”

  The definitive way he said it made it sound like they were planning something to do with me that weekend and this was the confirmation. “No, guys,” I said softly. “Don’t...”

  “You need clothes, Sang,” Victor said in a sharp tone. “You’re going.”

  I was turning a little to say something to Victor but Gabriel slapped me on the thigh. “Stop wriggling,” he said. “I’m going to cut you on accident if you do that.”

  I stood still, blushing and hoping anyone passing by wouldn’t notice. Gabriel worked at cutting out the shorts. He folded them to make a hem and he used some tape inside his makeshift cuff. He also managed to tape up the inside of the skirt at the waist so it hung tighter. “Nothing a little duct tape can’t solve,” he said. “Now we need a shirt.”