Ballad Of A Bad Bitch

by Ms. Bam

  * * * *

  4.He Makes Me Feel Brand New

  Mia opened the door to her spacious New York city loft. It was bright, comfortable and it all belonged to her and Jeremiah. In nine months her entire life had changed. The money she'd made from club appearances and off of her first two singles were more than enough to afford her some solitude of her own. When herself and Jeremiah had stepped off the Greyhound in Brooklyn,New York three years ago she hadn't even known where they were headed really. All she knew is that she had to get away from the situation she was in and Jeremiah had come through for her in a major way. From the day they'd met they'd formed an unbreakable bond in more ways than one. The Lord must have known she was going to need someone because she found out her own mama wasn't shit the very day God placed Jeremiah in her life.

  When they left San Antonio,TX they'd been happy to crash on Jeremiah's best friend Dip's couch in Brooklyn but she knew that time had come to an end. Especially the way she'd noticed Dip kept looking at her whenever Jeremiah wasn't around. Mia knew that look in a man's eyes all too well. The look of a man who wanted something from her and if she wasn't willing to give it to him...he'd take it. Unfortunately she'd become all to familiar with that look in a man's eyes. The plan had been for them to stay with Dip for a while so they wouldn't have to spend all the money Jeremiah had brought with him but that didn't last long. Jeremiah had been understanding when she'd told him about her fears staying there and found them a cheap studio apartment the same week. It was just as well. With news they found out the very next month,they would have had to move soon anyway.

  Mia hung up her jacket at the door and slipped her shoes off before continuing on to the kitchen. On her way home she'd had the taxi take her by her favorite Chinese food spot so she could grab something to bring home for dinner. She'd called Jeremiah on her way home to see if he wanted anything but he'd said he would be out working late.

  Mia grabbed him something anyway so he'd have something to eat when he got in. Once she got home the first thing she did was run herself a nice hot bath. All she wanted to do was relax for a little bit. It had been a long day and Reginald didn't make it any better with his last minute demands about her past. It really made her wonder who really wanted to know about it? The public or him. Mia made it a point to form a connection with her fans. After all they'd completely changed her entire life. Anything she could do to form a bond with them she did. Signing autographs,taking pictures as much as she was able to without sacrificing her safety,most importantly through her website. She went to her personal website daily to connect with her fans. Connecting with some of them on a damn near daily basis. They weren't asking about her past,only Reginald. Meeting Reginald had been a blessing and a curse. A blessing due to the fact he'd literally changed her life overnight and a curse because she could see the way he looked at her too. He wanted more than singing from her. She could see it in his eyes. The way he looked at her,tried to extend their time together. Everything. He was always doing a little too much and it wasn't just because he was her manager either. She'd caught him staring at her plenty of times. It was pathetic behavior coming from a married man. She played along though.

  Mia soaked in the tub until the water turned chilly before she pulled the plug, turned on the shower,scrubbed herself clean and stepped out.

  After dressing she made her way back to the kitchen and heated up her food.

  Mia sat at the kitchen island silently eating her food contemplating her next move. Should I warn them I'm coming home or just show up? Fuck that imma just show up. If my mom is still with Quinton,I'm not giving him a second to pull any of his tricks. I know one thing. The Mia King that left San Antonio,TX three years ago is not the same scared girl who ran away in fear three years ago.

  Mia finished her dinner then laid on the couch tuning into the Real Housewives of Atlanta. She loved the ratchetness of the show and recorded all the episodes on the DVR. Whenever she had free time, she caught up on the episodes and chatted with her fans on her website. Those were her main forms of entertainment as of late. After Jeremiah and Jacobi. She struggled to keep her eyes open,she was exhausted. Lately it seemed as if she were operating off fumes with the long hours all the team was keeping in the studio. Before she knew it the fight with sleep won and she was knocked out and the nightmares that had taken up permanent residence in her brain were overtaking her mind.

  “ Baby please! Please do this one thing for your mama. Don't I take care of you? Haven't I given you everything in this world I can?”

  “ Yes mama but how can you ask me to do that? I can't do that mama!” I cried shaking my head,my eyes wide with fear. All of a sudden I felt a sharp crack across my face that brought tears to my eyes.

  “ Grow the fuck up Mia! Your little black ass been reading way too many romance novels. That shit ain’t real life. This is real life. I need this.” my mother said grabbing my face towards hers so that I was looking into her eyes that seemed to mirror the same emotion as mine. Fear. Though her fear stemmed from very different reasons than mine.

  “ Aint no need holding on to some shit you're going to end up giving away to some horny boy out on these streets for free. If you ain’t already gave it away from what Quinton told me! Like I said this is real life and that nigga out there says he loves me! If I have to share my man with any young bitch out here it may as well be my daughter! At least that way I know he ain’t straying too far. If you don't he's going to leave. What am I going to do then? No you're doing it. Aint no other choice. It's not like you're a baby, or a little girl. You owe me after all the sacrifices I've made for you. Having to raise you all by myself and in a few months you'll be gone. I'll be all alone. I don't want Quinton to leave me! It's time for you to sacrifice for me now!” her mother said more to herself than Mia. Rationalizing the fact that she was a mother who was now about to prostitute her own daughter...to the man who for the last nine months had been her exclusive boyfriend and who she'd convinced herself was the love of her life. Her last chance at love.

  Mia was visibly shaking in disbelief and fear. The request or rather the demand coming from her mother's boyfriend Quinton Jones didn't surprise her. Mia was innocent to the ways of men but she'd never liked Quinton her mothers new boyfriend of nine months. He always stared two seconds too long for her taste. The intentional brushes against her in the kitchen when there was more than enough space for him to pass.

  “ I'm not doing it Mama! I'll just leave.” Mia said attempting to raise up from the bed. Her mother forcefully pushed her back down.

  “ Leave to go where? Bitch don't nobody wanna take care of you! All we have is each other. Stop acting like this is going to kill you. I've been through worse than this in my life. Now he wants you and I wanna keep my goddamn man! All Quinton needs to do is get the idea of youth out of his system and we'll be on track. Once he can see you ain’t got nothing on me... all this will be over. You can go to college and we can put this entire thing behind us!”

  Mia jumped out of the bed and ran towards the door. It was eleven in the evening but she didn't give a damn. Her mother had officially lost her fuckin' mind! Was she on drugs? Her eyes had a wild crazy look to them.

  “ Quinton! Come in here she's trying to run!”

  Jeremiah walked into the loft he shared with Mia and quietly took off his jacket and shoes in the entry way. It was almost two in the morning. He'd been working late hours trying to help his friend Dip get his club off the ground. When he and Mia had showed up in New York with only a phone call as notice,Dip didn't hesitate to hook them up with a place to stay. They'd met when they were both locked up together in Texas. Once Dip had gotten out he'd gone back to New York where he was from originally.

  Jeremiah walked into the living-room room and could see Mia tossing and turning on the couch. Frantic,soft cries of distress falling from her lips.

  Damn! Baby-girl gonna need to get some help for this shit right here. She can't live the rest of her life like this.
Jeremiah looked at her and shook his head. He'd give anything to wipe those memories from her mind. Mia never needed to tell him what her nightmare was about. He already knew.

  Jeremiah walked toward the couch where she was lying calling out her name softly. Shit he wasn't about to touch her ass. He'd learned all to well not to suddenly come up on Mia or he'd find himself sliced.

  “ Mia!”

  She only grew more agitated in her sleep,tossing her head back and forth. Jeremiah slowly reached down to quickly find both of her hands and grab her wrists. If he touched her and left her hands free at all he already knew within seconds he'd have a knife at his throat. Mia never casually sat around without anything within her reach for protection.

  He grabbed her wrists tightly and quickly.

  “ Mia! Wake up!”

  Her eyes flew open in shock as she tried to jerk her hands free but Jeremiah held them tightly in front of her.

  “ Wake up bae, you're having another one of those dreams again.”

  Her breath came hard and labored until she realized she was safe. It was Jeremiah. She was always safe with Jeremiah. He let go of her arms and she slowly wound her arms around his neck and pulled him down onto the couch where she cradled her head at the base of his neck.

  “What's on your mind girl? You ain’t had one of those dreams in about two weeks.”he asked softly rubbing her back.

  He could feel her tears on his neck.

  “ Mia talk to me.”

  “ It's a lotta shit going on right now Jeremiah. We'll talk about it later. Not now okay? I'm just glad you're home I missed you. What time is it?”

  “ A little after two.”

  “ Did you eat? I picked you up something. Go have a shower and relax yourself while I heat it up for you.” she said raising from the couch and rubbing his smooth bald head. Only the lord knows how much I love this man. I don't even think he can fathom how much I love him. They parted ways as Mia walked into the kitchen to prepare his plate and Jeremiah went into their bedroom to shower and change.