by Jessie Cooke
“The tattoo, on your chest, what does it mean?”
Some of the joy he was feeling ebbed away but he said, “The Bulls was the code name for my unit. The bodies being enmeshed but the heads pulling away is symbolic of us being one as a sort of ‘family’ yet each one of us had our own brain and with that, contributed equally to the group.”
She smiled and said, “I like that. Maybe someday you and I can get one of those that match...you know, to symbolize the same thing.”
“Absolutely. Whatever you want.”
“Really? Whatever?”
“Mm-hmm,” he said, pulling her back in, closer.
“I’d like to see how good you are at going down on me, we haven’t done that yet.”
Maddox laughed out loud at that, but he was already on his feet, pulling her up onto hers and letting her lead him down the hallway and into the bedroom.
19
When they got into the bedroom, Maddox proved to Carmella that he could satisfy her with every part of his body. She fell asleep that night in his arms and slept like a newborn, until she was woken up sometime early in the morning by shaking and sounds like someone was being tortured. It frightened her at first, but after a few seconds she realized it was him, and he was dreaming. Shaking him softly as she touched him on his shoulder she whispered his name. At first he didn’t wake up, and she could tell by the look of agony on his face that he wasn’t dreaming, he was having a nightmare.
“Maddox...baby, please wake up,” she said, this time shaking him harder and talking louder. His pretty dark hazel eyes flew open suddenly and latched onto her face. For a few seconds she could tell that he wasn’t really seeing her, but she just waited until finally recognition slipped into them and he slid his big arm underneath her and pulled her up against his body, and back down into the warm bed. She could feel that he was shaking all over, but she gave him a few minutes before saying, “What were you dreaming about?”
Maddox hesitated for so long that she thought he wasn’t going to answer her. When he finally did, it was in a husky whisper. “I’m sorry. I still dream about them, sometimes.”
Carmella put her arm across his chest. She didn’t feel threatened at all by the love he had for the family he lost, but she felt powerless to help him. She’d lost her mother when she was a kid, but she’d never lost anyone that she’d loved the way that Maddox loved his family. She’d never loved anyone that way, although she suspected that when it did happen for her, the man she was lying next to would be the one. “Maddox,” she whispered. “Tell me more about them. What was Lizzie like?”
Again, there was a long hesitation, and then to her surprise he felt his hand on her naked body, turning her over so that she was lying face down. His weight shifted on the bed, and suddenly she felt his hands as they slowly made their way down her back, working and kneading at her muscles as his palms pushed deep into her skin, making her spine tingle. He moved his hands in a swirling motion, each time going lower on her back, pushing the blanket down as he did. When he reached the top of the curve of her butt, and then gripped each cheek tightly in his big hands and squeezed, she sucked in a deep breath. She closed her eyes and just let him massage and caress her...loving every minute of it but wondering if he was only trying to distract her from the question she asked.
Maddox pulled the blanket up on one side of her body and his hands found their way to the upper thigh that was left uncovered. Carmella could feel herself getting wet again each time he slid his hands up and down the lines of her leg, from her knee up to just below the pussy that he’d tasted only hours before. Carmella was so mesmerized by the massage that she waffled between opening her legs and begging him to touch her, and falling back into a deep, comfortable sleep. Since the first night she was with Maddox, she’d never felt so safe and comfortable in any man’s hands. Soft sighs escaped from her throat and when he finally stopped massaging her backside and gently rolled her over to face him, she expected him to ravage her. Instead, he sat straddling her hips and looking down at her with those sexy hazel eyes and he said:
“Lizzie was beautiful. She had red hair and blue eyes and like most redheads, she had the fire to go along with it. But as much as her temper could flare, she could also be the kindest, sweetest person on earth. She wanted to help everyone; she couldn’t sleep at night if she knew there was a neighbor who was hungry, or needed anything at all that Lizzie could give them. She was one of those people who were born to be a mother. She had that maternal instinct that just consumed her, and Kevin was the luckiest little boy in the world to have her. She had him talking in full sentences by the time he was two years old. He could read books when he was four. She opened up the world to him and let him decide which direction he wanted to go. As long as it was a safe path, she let him take it. While I was away, she got him into BMX racing, and baseball, two things he really wanted to do. Her world revolved around him, but that didn’t mean she didn’t have time for everyone else too. When I was home, I felt like I was the center of her universe. Even if she was angry with me about something, I always felt the love. And then Kevin...that little boy looked at me, and that hero I always wanted to be surfaced. He made me feel invincible. He made me want to be the best man on the planet.”
Maddox reached up and touched the tears on his face and then looked at his fingers like he was surprised that they were wet. Carmella lay silent, tears of her own stinging her eyes, and waited. When he went on, he said, “I hope that you understand, they will always be a part of me. I don’t dream about them as often as I used to, but they’re still there, and so are my men...my unit. I still see all of their faces when I close my eyes. Donovan, my best friend and my boss, he tells me it will get easier with time. I never believed him, until now.” He leaned down and caught her lips with his, kissing her softly, and then he pulled his face up enough to say, “I don’t want you to ever feel like my memories will take away from how I feel about you. I’ve only known you a couple of weeks, and already I know that I’m going to fall madly in love with you. So, I don’t ever want you to feel like you’re second best, or that you have to compete with a ghost. Lizzie was incredible, and I’ll never forget her...and Kevin was my heart...but I’m learning just recently that the heart has the ability to grow and make more room, and I sure feel like there’s plenty of room in there for you.”
Carmella reached up and put her hands around his neck, pulling him back down into another kiss, this one more passionate. She loved the way he kissed her. She loved the taste of his lips, the way he smelled so masculine, and the way his body was so hard against her soft skin. She loved tracing the lines and curves of the muscles on his back while they kissed or made love, and she loved the way his thick brown hair fell down over his sexy eyes when he pulled out of the kiss to look down at her face. She could live with Lizzie's and Kevin’s memory, as long as he was right and his heart just kept growing to accommodate her...and maybe a child of their own someday.
Maddox looked down at Carmella’s pretty face. Her hair was everywhere, cloaking her naked shoulders and fanning out around her. His eyes moved from her face to the curve of her delicate throat, and collarbone and down further still to the swell of her breasts. Just looking at her made his cock come to life, but it was more than that. He felt a connection deep in his core, a fire that burned hot, just for her. He had to clear his throat to speak and when he did he said:
“I’m so damned afraid of hurting you.”
“You’re not going to hurt me,” she said, in a sexy, throaty voice.
“Not physically,” he said. “Not ever...but...” She reached up and put her soft fingers against his lips and said:
“Lizzie and Kevin will always be a part of you, and that’s okay. I’m thankful to them, for helping make you the man you are this minute. We can have a future, Maddox...without completely forgetting the past.”
He was completely trapped in the warmth of her dark brown eyes. The feeling was so intense that it was almost unbearable, so
he lay down next to her again and let her curl into his arms, and her body melded into his. After a few beats of his already racing heart, he put his hand in her hair and brought her face so close to his that he could taste her sweet breath against his lips. Suddenly, looking into her eyes and feeling her heartbeat against his, nothing else in the world mattered. “Kiss me, Maddox,” she whispered. “Like you mean it.” She parted her full lips and Maddox closed that scant distance between them and took her lips with his. He had to keep a grip on the back of her head to keep it from snapping back from the force of the kiss, and their tongues tangled up in a hot, sexy, passionate dance. That void that he’d lived with for so long was suddenly full, just like that. It was as if he’d been in a vacuum with no air and someone had opened it up...and at last his lungs were full. Carmella kissed him back with a passion and desire that matched his, allowing his probing tongue to find its way to as much of the dark, wet crevice as it could reach. Her body moved against his at the same time, driving him wild and sending goosebumps skittering down his spine and across his back. He let one of his hands slide down the curve of her round hip and come to settle on the rounded flesh of her butt, squeezing it again and pulling her in tighter against him.
Carmella was the first to pull out of the kiss, and as soon as she did, a deep, guttural sound escaped her lips. “Maddox,” she said, like his name was a sigh of pleasure. He loved the way it sounded, and hearing it caused waves of new heat to course through him, and then with her smoldering eyes locked into his, she slid her hand down to take his hard cock in her hand and it was his turn to cry out. She stroked him lightly, but Maddox needed more at that moment. He covered her hand with his own and with a tight grip on her hand and his own cock, they both began to stroke. He fell back onto the pillow and felt his eyes roll back into his head. Her lips were on his neck now and she completely owned him. At that moment she could ask him for anything in the world, and he’d find a way to give it to her.
He moved his hand and lay there for a while just letting the feelings of what she was doing flow through him. She ran her thumb across the head of his wet cock and he hissed through his teeth to keep from screaming. The fire that she’d ignited was so hot it was burning him from the inside out, and when one of his hands found one of her breasts, and the taut nipple, he began to pinch and pull at it wildly, causing sounds to come out of her that caused his cock to grow even harder. He knew he was being rough with her, but she didn’t seem to mind. On the contrary, the rougher he was, the more excited she seemed to become. “You’re killing me,” he whispered in a voice now that sounded like he’d just run a mile. She giggled slightly and said:
“Right back at you. Fuck me, Maddox. I need you inside of me.”
He wanted to be inside of her, but he didn’t want to stop what they were doing long enough to put on a condom. Reluctantly he let go of her breast and rolled over so that he was back over her, on his knees. He licked his lips, kissed her lightly, and then ran his tongue down from her bottom lip to one of her breasts and roughly sucked it into his mouth. She gasped and arched her back, tangling her fingers up in his hair and pushing him deeper against her chest. Maddox played with the nipple with his tongue and then nipped at it with his teeth. He sucked as much of that full breast as he could into his mouth, before moving to the other side and doing the same to the other.
When he finally left her breast, he kissed his way down her flat stomach, reaching her mound and dragging his tongue across it. They’d made love the night before and although he’d worn a condom, she still tasted like the two of them together. The thought of her skin being saturated with his fluids made him even crazier with lust and without giving her any warning, he used both of his arms to scoop her bottom up off the bed and bury his face between her legs. Fuck, she tasted like heaven.
Maddox sucked on her outer lips before letting his tongue finally delve in between them. He loved the way she felt against his tongue as well as the way she tasted. He also loved the sounds she made and the way she squirmed in his arms and breathed out his name. He flicked around with his tongue for a while, sliding it in and out of her, and then again without warning, he took her clit between his front teeth and bit down on it, causing her to cry out loudly and tighten her grip on his hair. She pushed his face down hard, begging for more without saying a word, and he was happy to oblige. He felt like he was on the verge of an orgasm, without her even touching his cock. The way she tasted, the way she smelled, the feel of her skin, and the way she moved against his face were all enough to send him careening wildly off the edge of the cliff she had him dangling from. It was magic...magic that was rudely interrupted by the ringing of his phone. He tried to ignore it, continuing on with what he was doing. It was Carmella who, the second time it stopped ringing and started again, said:
“Maybe you should get that. I could use a break.” He pulled his head up and looked at her flushed face. She was smiling from ear to ear and her pretty eyes were lit up like candles. “But don’t worry, I’ll remember exactly where you were.”
He grinned at her. “Fine, but I’m only getting up so that I can grab a condom. After I finish my sweet breakfast, I need to be inside of you.” He reluctantly rolled off the bed and got to his feet to reach for the phone on the nightstand. When he saw it was Blackheart, he almost didn’t answer it, but he looked up at Carmella and she nodded. “Hey,” he said, trying not to sound like he’d just been having wild sex. Blackheart was more perceptive than Maddox had given him credit for. He heard the biker chuckle and say:
“Sorry to interrupt, but glad to know you found her.”
Maddox chuckled too and then said, “What the fuck do you want?” jovially.
“I want you to remember to be at the barbecue. Mario will be there, and so will Gianni and Frankie.”
Maddox frowned. The last time he’d seen Gianni and Frankie he was sure would be the very last. “You invited them to a barbecue?” Carmella sat up and looked curious, so he hit the speaker button and Blackheart’s deep voice floated out into the room.
“Not necessarily invited. It’s more like we invited Mario and now that Louis is out of the hospital, he prepared a special cut of meat for him...fresh meat. It only came into the butcher shop about a week ago. Don’t worry though, the rest of us will be having beef.”
Maddox’s jaw nearly hit the floor when he realized what Blackheart was saying. He’d heard the rumors about feeding his enemies to the gators, everyone had...but was he seriously going to feed his most recent enemies to their boss? He looked at Carmella and he could see in her eyes that she understood what the club president was saying as well. At first he was almost terrified at what she must be thinking...and then slowly a smile spread across her face and she began to laugh, almost hysterically. Blackheart heard her and he laughed too and said:
“Can I take that to mean you’ll both be there?”
Still giggling Carmella said, “With bells on.” Maddox had to laugh then too. He’d heard that Jokers were wild...but this was taking it to a whole new level. He realized at that moment that his little Carmella was wild too. She finally got her giggles under control and said, “But right now Maddox needs to finish his breakfast, so we’ll see you later.”
Maddox could still hear Blackheart’s laugh as he disconnected the call. He tossed the phone on the floor and grabbed for a condom. He laid it on the bed within reach, lifted Carmella’s pretty hips up off the bed again, and said, “Where was I?”
“You were just about to rock my world, baby.”
He put his face back between her legs and thought about what Blackheart said again. With her flesh pressed into his lips he started laughing again, and then she started laughing, and he realized that as odd as what they were laughing about was, it was the first time in five years that he’d really been happy enough to laugh like that, and he knew that wasn’t about Blackheart, or the Jokers. It was about his person, his second chance. His Carmella.
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Books by Jessie Cooke
Jokers MC Louisiana
Blackheart
Gabriel
Maddox
SKULLS MC Romance
Dax: (Southside Skulls 1)
Cody: (Southside Skulls 2)
Gunner: (Southside Skulls 3)
Zack: (Southside Skulls 4)
Levi: (Southside Skulls 5)
Kat: (Southside Skulls 6)
Hunter: (Southside Skulls 7)
Garrett: (Southside Skulls 8)
Wheelie: (Southside Skulls 9)
Jigsaw/Rusty: (Southside Skulls 10)
Chopper: (Southside Skulls 11)
Ryder: (Southside Skulls 12)
Wolf 1: (Westside Skulls 1)
Wolf 2: (Westside Skulls 2)
Bruf: (Westside Skulls 3)
Ash: (Westside Skulls 4)
Sledge: (Westside Skulls 5)
Maz: (Westside Skulls 6)
Doc: (Skulls The Early Years 1)
Coyote: (Skulls The Early Years 2)
Beck: (Westside Skulls 7)
Rise of the Phoenix: (Phoenix Skulls 1)
Jace: (Phoenix Skulls 2)
Finn: (Phoenix Skulls 3)
Tse: (Skulls The Early Years 3)
AJ: (Phoenix Skulls 4)
Hawk: (Skulls The Early Years 4)
Lion: (Southside Skulls 13)
Collin: (Phoenix Skulls 5)
