by JJ Harper
As he softens, I clean him up, licking until he fidgets at the sensitivity.
Max hauls me up to my feet and wraps his hand around my dick. “God, August Andrews, I fucking love you.”
My breath hitches in my throat as I stare at him. We haven’t said those words before. We’ve only known each other for three weeks. But it doesn’t matter because I love him too.
“That’s good to know because I fucking love you too, Max Richardson.”
His kiss is soft, reverent even, as his tongue swipes over mine. In contrast, his hand works up and down my dick, making my climax build with rapid alacrity. My cries are muffled by his mouth as my orgasm floods his fist. I break away panting and shuddering. Max touches his forehead to mine.
“Love you, baby,” he whispers again.
I look down at his hand and grin. “The bathroom is through that door.” I point to a door on the other side of the room.
“Is it now? Lie down. You need to sleep.” He steps back from me and licks the palm of his hand clean.
“Dirty boy.” I laugh. “Will you lie with me?”
“Anytime you want.”
The light coming into the room from a different angle confuses me when I wake up. Then I remember I’m in Gus’s family home. I like it here. It’s not the building, which is stunning, but it’s the people. Lucy and Ed Andrews are so full of life and love. Dinner last night was a huge, delicious beef stew, with more than a few bottles of red wine to wash it down. The conversation was loud and full of laughter as they regaled me with stories of Gus as a child. The brave, headstrong man he is now is how he grew up. Always determined and feisty with a brilliant mind. He grew up surrounded by love and encouragement to be whoever he wanted to be. A stark contrast to my upbringing. My parents never told us we were loved or clever. We were supposed to be the same as them, happy to live off government benefits and never do any more than the bare minimum. Jonas was always standing up for me. I was small for my age, until I was about fifteen, when I had a massive growth spurt, but I was still a gangly teenager. Jonas took me to the local gym and showed me how to train, to build muscle, and how to escape the hateful home life.
It was there that I worked out I was gay. I couldn’t believe that I’d never realised. Jonas nudged me one day, hissing at me not to stare, as I ogled the buff body of one of his friends. “Cut it out, Max. You’ll get your head kicked in.”
When he told me he was gay, we knew we were in for a world of hell and recrimination from our parents. Jonas said we had to wait until he was old enough to get a job. Otherwise, we’d be on our arses as soon as they found out. He was right.
I gaze at my beautiful man, his face so relaxed in sleep. His vibrancy dissipated for the hours he rests, ready to show itself again as soon as he wakes up. I’m getting fidgety lying here, but I don’t want to wake him. He needs his sleep. I slide slowly out of bed, grab some clothes, and take them into the bathroom. I have a pee and brush my teeth. After getting dressed, I leave Gus in bed and go downstairs. Signs of life are coming from the large farmhouse kitchen. I already know this room is the heart of the house. As I walk in, Ed glances up and gives me a welcoming smile. The spaniel bustles around to get some attention. I bend down and scratch at his liver-coloured ears.
“I didn’t think it would be August up this early. He likes his sleep far too much. He wastes the best part of the day.” Ed stands and moves over to the kettle. “Tea or coffee?”
“Coffee would be great. Black is perfect.” I walk over to the open back door and look out into the garden. It’s just how it should be for this house and its occupants, loud and bright and in a little bit of a jumble. But it works. I have no clue about flowers or plants, yet I can see that these have been chosen to look like this. “This must be a riot of colour in the summer,” I comment as Ed brings me a cup of coffee. The aroma of the rich blend hits my nose. It will pack a punch. Exactly what I need to get me going.
“It is. Lucy loves her garden.” He pauses as he studies me, not intrusively, more intrigued. “You’re not what I expected. You’re older, more together,” Ed says quietly, his eyes fixed on the garden. “I don’t really know what I thought you’d be like, because now I’ve met you, I can’t imagine Gus being with anyone else. You love him.” It isn’t a question.
“I do,” I reply. “Very much.”
“Have you told him?”
I let out a gruff laugh at his bluntness.
“Yes, and it seems I’m in luck because he’s said it to me too.” I bring the mug up to my mouth but only blow over the surface. It’s too hot to drink yet, but it gives me something to do as I wait for his next comment.
“I knew I loved his mother from the moment I set eyes on her. She told me the same thing.”
“Gus has told me his mum’s theory. It seems such an unbelievable concept in the world today. When everyone is determined to have as much fun as possible, no one is looking for the one person to be theirs.”
“And yet you believed him.”
“I think it came more as a relief when he told me. I was battling with how I could’ve fallen so quickly for someone so very different from me. His words let me trust myself and believe it was okay to want him, to keep him for me. I know he’s a lot younger than me. He’s brilliant and has a fabulous career ahead of him. And I’m still prepared to be with him for as long as he’ll let me.”
“You’re a good man, Max. It’ll all work out for the best. I’m sure you’ve noticed that I have a few years on Lucy, and we’ve never let that come between us. Everything happens for a reason. You simply have to wait for the reason to show itself.”
“This sounds like a heavy conversation to have before breakfast,” a voice says from behind us.
“Just shooting the shit, Lucy. Max is a good listener.” Ed winks at me, then steps towards his wife and gives her a sound kiss.
“He’ll have to be with Gus. That boy never stops talking.” She opens cupboards and brings out frying pans and skillets, then bustles to the fridge to gather up bacon and sausages. “Have we any eggs, dear?”
“I haven’t checked.” Ed turns to me. “D’you fancy a walk with me? We can go and check on the chooks.”
“I’d love to.” I put my cup down, but he shakes his head.
“Bring that with you. It’s not far.”
We stroll through the garden. Ed points out where Gus used to have a tyre swing hanging from a massive branch of an oak tree. He tells tales of finding him and his friends drunk as lords after finishing their A levels and having to turn the hose on them to wake them up the next morning.
“He’s very lucky to have parents like you.”
“Ah,” he says sagely, “not so much for you. You seem to have made the best of yourself. Don’t let the past drag you down.” We walk through a small wooden gate and stop at a chicken coop. “Here we are. Let’s see what the girls have given us today.”
A hotchpotch of chickens, in a variety of sizes and colours, all squawk and peck at each other. They are noisy and bossy and absolutely terrify me. Ed opens a metal bin and fills up a chicken feeder with pellets, then throws some on the ground for them to squabble over.
“I can get into the nesting box now they’re happy feeding.” He lifts up a hatch at the back and places the fresh eggs in a shallow basket that was hanging on the side. “Oh, good girls, there’s plenty for all of us.”
When we reach the kitchen, the smell of bacon and sausages sizzling away permeates the air. My eyes are focused on the dishevelled heap of Gus sitting at the table with his head propped up by his hands under his chin. I make my way around the table and give him a kiss. “Morning, baby.”
“Ugh, go away. I hate how perky you all are.” He glowers at me as I sit next to him and sling my arm around his shoulders.
“No, you don’t. You love us.” I kiss his forehead and love how he leans into me.
He hums and haws, still grumbling until his mum hands him a cup of coffee. “Thanks, Mum.”
&
nbsp; Breakfast is amazing and huge. I don’t know how they are all so slim with the amount of food they eat.
“What are you two going to do today?” Lucy asks Gus.
“I don’t plan to do anything more than laze around. Max needs a rest too. He’s been working too much and hasn’t had a day of doing nothing since before all the shit went down. Looking after me has been hard for him. I know I’m not the easiest of patients.”
“Hey, I told you I wanted to look after you. You needed help, Gus. You couldn’t get dressed by yourself, let alone cook and do all the other things we take for granted. That’s what boyfriends do.” I glower at him until he smiles.
“You did, and thank you. Today we’re going to do nothing more than take a walk to the pub at lunchtime, then snooze all afternoon on the sun loungers.”
“Sounds good to me.” I lift up his hand and kiss the back.
“You really know how to relax, Gus.” I extend my hand to him as we lie on the loungers. We’ve got fleece blankets over our legs, as the sun has lost its warmth now. The added heat of the patio burners means we’ve spent way into the early evening lying here, sometimes talking, other times filled with a comfortable silence. Gus entwines his fingers with mine.
“Thank you, Max,” he says softly as he squeezes my hand.
“What for?”
“Coming here with me. I needed this. You’ve been amazing with my folks, listening to them waffle on about all sorts of rubbish. They love you, y’know. I knew they would, but I know you didn’t. You don’t believe you’re worth any parental approval. But you are, and they do. Approve of you, and not just because you’re my boyfriend, but because you’re a good person. So like I said, thank you.”
He stays quiet for a while. “But FYI when we get back tomorrow, I expect you to fuck my brains out.”
I burst out in a huge peal of laughter. “Okay, baby. I think I can manage that.”
The following weeks went quickly. September left and took the last of the heatwave with it. October brought the bitter wind and rain that lasted only a few minutes but soaked you to your skin. I’ve become the happiest I’ve ever been, with the one exception of the court case for the four men who assaulted me. Their guilty plea means I can stay out of the courtroom and let the judge make the decision on the level of punishment. As the date gets nearer, I’m fielding phone calls from my mother constantly wanting to check in. On top of that, Max is overprotective. I get it. He feels guilty, but what happened wasn’t his fault. I can tell him it could’ve happened anywhere, at any time, until I’m blue in the face, but he’s not accepting it. I’m hoping it’ll all be over with by the end of next week and we can put it behind us.
As I walk down the corridor leading from the lecture hall I’ve just left, someone calls my name. My favourite lecturer, Professor Lindon, strides up to me, a broad smile on her face.
“Gus, it’s good to see you again. I was worried that after your attack, you might’ve decided not to take my idea any further.”
“Um, I must admit I haven’t thought too much about it, but I’m interested. I need a little more time to find out how this will affect my plans, and I want to discuss it with my parents. They’ll have an opinion on it, I’m sure.”
“A good one, I hope?”
“Yes, but it comes down to finances. I’d planned to get a job as soon as I graduated. This will change it all.”
“Apply, Gus. There is no harm in that. You know it comes with a large bursary. That must surely help?”
“Yes, it will. I’ll look through it tonight. I have the night off work and to myself. I’ll do some research.”
“Excellent. I have high hopes for you, Gus.”
I thank her and watch her walk back down the corridor. What would Max say? Ask him then, you idiot. Communication is the most important part of any relationship.
I head out of the building and turn into the road leading to my flat. Max is working and has agreed to us having a night apart. He was not happy about it, though. He stomped about and sulked like a three-year-old, moaning about having to sleep alone.
Just thinking about him makes my heart beat a little faster. I pull my phone out of my pocket and check if he’s messaged. The three messages are an improvement on the last week or so. In the last one, he asks me to call him when I’m done for the day. I scroll to bring up his name, press Call, and wait for him to answer.
“Hey, baby. Are you all done?” he asks. It’s quiet around him. He must be in the office rather than in the bar.
“Yep, I’m finished. Now I have hours of essays to write.” And the research to do to placate my lecturer, but I keep that part to myself.
“Are you sure you don’t want to go to my place to do it? I gave you a key for that reason.”
“No, I’ve got my books and notes at mine. It’s easier to do it there.” I keep walking, not paying much attention to what’s going on around me. Then someone steps in front of me, blocking my way. Startled, I look up. My mouth goes dry, and my stomach clenches.
“Hi, I thought it was you. You look different without the make-up.”
Max is calling my name, wanting to know what’s going on, but I can’t find the words. Standing in front of me is the man from the pub, the one Max knows, the man who is friends with the arseholes who attacked me. I can’t remember his name.
“What do you want?” I try to keep the shakiness from my voice, but it’s clear, even to my own ears. A smirk ghosts his lips.
“I want to apologise. Those men that hurt you, they’re not my friends. I only know them from the gym. I couldn’t believe what they’d done. I thought they were decent blokes. I’m sorry I put you on their radar.”
“Okay. Thank you for saying that. It doesn’t matter. The case goes to court next week. I want to forget about it now.”
“I’m sorry,” he says again, then gives me a small smile. “Are you still with Max?”
Is this guy for real? Is he actually hitting on me? I shake my head and mutter ‘unbelievable’ under my breath.
“Yes, I’m still with Max.”
An emotion I can’t put my finger on sweeps over his face. Then it’s gone as he schools his expression back to neutral. “That’s good to know. I guess I’ll see you around.” He steps to the side and lets me carry on my way.
My hand still trembling a bit, I lift my phone to my ear. “Max, sorry, I’m back.” But he doesn’t answer. I look at my phone. The screen is black. I must have ended the call without realising it. I’ll call him when I get indoors and feel safer. I pick up speed, in a rush now to get home.
As soon as I’m in my bedroom, I head straight for the shower, stripping off my clothes as I go. All the memories come hurtling back to me—the sneers that led to pushes and ended with punches and kicks. The filthy disgusting words they called me are screaming in my head as I scrub my body clean, again and again. Tears are streaming down my face. Finally, as the water cools, I switch off the shower and climb out. My hand is halfway the towel rack when I see Max standing in the doorway.
His body is rigid, his eyes filled with fear and panic as they roam every inch of me. The adrenaline leaves my body. My shoulders droop, and my knees buckle. Max catches me and gathers me in his arms.
“It’s okay, baby. I’ve got you,” he croons as he sits on the floor, holding my wet body tight to his, letting me cry.
It doesn’t take me too long to pull myself together, and I push up off the floor. Max stands as well, grabs the towel, and wraps it around me.
“Talk to me, Gus. What happened? Who was it?”
“I can’t remember his name. It was the man from the pub, the one you knew that was with those arseholes.”
“Grant? What the fuck did he want? What did he say?” Max’s eyes are blazing with fury.
“That he was sorry, that he didn’t know they were like that. He only knew them from the gym.” I bite on my lip. I don’t want to tell Max any more.
“What else did he say?”
“Nothing, really. I think he wanted me to know he had nothing to do with the attack. He said he was sorry he brought me to their attention.”
“And? Come on, Gus, I know you. There’s more.”
“He wanted to know if we were still together.” I cave. He knows me too well, and I don’t want there to be secrets between us.
“That little piece of fucking shit! I’m going to kick his arse so hard my foot will be in his fucking throat.” He paces around the room. Then his eyes narrow and fix on me. “Where were you when he found you?”
“Um, by the crossing near the primary school. Why?”
“So, not close to your flat? Could he have followed you back here?”
“I…I don’t know. I didn’t look back to see where he went. I just wanted to go home.” I’m shaking now, my heart beating irregularly. What I thought was a genuine apology could’ve been a ruse to find out where I live.
Max walks out of my room, his phone at his ear. I can hear his voice but not what he’s saying. I grab a pair of shorts and follow him into the kitchen. It sounds like his conversation is ending. He thanks the person, ends the call, and shoves his phone back into his pocket.
“Who did you call?”
“The police. Grant lied to you. He knows those guys well enough. He may have been genuinely shocked, but after he asked you about us, I don’t trust him a fucking inch.”
“What’s going to happen?”
“The police will pay him a visit and tell him to back the hell away.”
“I’m fucking sick of all this crap!” Anger hits me. I’m pissed off all of a sudden. “Who the fuck does this sort of shit? Christ, I’m twenty-one, never had any enemies. I’m a nice guy, a good friend. I work at a bar and will have my Physics degree soon. I happen to be gay. That’s it! No big fucking deal. It’s my business what I do in bed and who I do it with. I don’t go around telling those fucknuts that the clothes they wear are shite or that they’ll never get laid with those fucking terrible haircuts. I don’t deserve any of this bollocks!”
