The Christmas Fair Killer

by Amy Patricia Meade

  That said, Tish was on strict orders to rest, avoid any strenuous activities, and to use a wheelchair until she could return to the hospital after the New Year for a thorough evaluation.

  Tish lamented her inability to dive back into work at the café, but as she was so grateful to be alive and out of the hospital, she wasn’t about to complain. Tish was therefore quite surprised when Schuyler, upon picking her up from the hospital, drove directly to the café instead of his condo on the edge of town.

  ‘What are we doing here? The café should be closed by now, but the lights are still on. My electric bill is going to be sky high!’ She suddenly took note of the number of cars in the parking lot. ‘OK, what’s up?’

  Schuyler parked his BMW in front of the ramp leading to the front door. ‘I know you’re under strict orders not to be at the café, but the doctor never said anything about attending a welcome-home party here, did she?’

  ‘A party? You mean all the lights and all the people … are for me?’ Tish leaned back in the passenger seat and drew a hand to her mouth.

  ‘They are,’ Schuyler confirmed as he leaned in close and planted a kiss on her lips. ‘Merry Christmas.’

  ‘Merry Christmas.’ Tish wept tears of joy and gratitude as she threw her arms around Schuyler’s neck. ‘Did you do all of this?’

  ‘Um, no. When I learned that you were coming home today, I called Mary Jo, Jules, and Celestine and asked if they could join us for a small gathering, as we’d originally planned. After that, it was entirely out of my control. Mary Jo spoke with Augusta May, Celestine spoke with Opal, and Jules, well, Jules—’

  ‘Spoke with everyone,’ Tish sounded in unison.

  ‘Yeah, so now we have a welcome-home-slash-Christmas-slash-town-pot-luck party.’

  Slightly self-conscious about the number of guests she was about to receive, Tish took her makeup bag from her handbag, pulled down the visor, and applied a fresh layer of mascara. ‘Potluck?’

  ‘Yes, everyone thought you would like it if they cooked for you for a change.’

  ‘I love it!’ Tish smiled broadly, tears still in her eyes. ‘Well, let’s get started, then.’

  As Tish added a quick swipe of lipstick, Schuyler, looking cozy in a cream-colored cable-knit sweater, jeans, and suede jacket, got the wheelchair from the trunk of his car and pushed it to the passenger side door where Tish stood waiting. ‘You’re supposed to be resting,’ he reminded her.

  ‘I’m standing, not jogging.’ She sighed. ‘Even in the hospital I got some steps in every day.’

  It was Schuyler’s turn to sigh. ‘OK, OK, I just don’t want you to overdo it.’

  ‘I won’t,’ she promised and sat in the chair. Sunday’s surprise snow had dumped six inches of the white stuff in central Virginia, but all that remained was a thin layer of slush. ‘Unless the term “overdo” is in reference to Celestine’s chocolate-and-peppermint-candy-cane brownies.’

  ‘Given you’ve lived solely on hospital food for five days, I think you’re more than entitled,’ Schuyler allowed as he pushed her up the ramp to the front porch and swung open the door.

  The scene inside the café was magical. Tish had done a good job of decking the halls earlier in the season, but someone (most likely Jules) had truly gilded the lily, adding a layer of fine tinsel and glass icicles to the tree and wrapping the pine garland that ran along the perimeter of the space with strand after strand of clear, star-shaped lights. The counter, which during business hours would have provided space for patrons to eat, was laden with just about every Southern cold-weather potluck staple: chicken and dumplings, squash casserole, creamy shrimp and wild rice, sweet potato souffle, cheesy baked grits, green beans simmered with a salty ham hock, and, of course, biscuits.

  And then there were the sweets. Silver platters piled high with divinity, praline fudge, pecan sandies, Linzer tarts, snickerdoodles, jam thumbprints, frosted sugar cookies, rum balls, gingerbread people, and, of course, peppermint-candy-cane brownies.

  But by far the most beautiful sight of all was that of the friends and neighbors gathered within the café’s walls. ‘Welcome home,’ they shouted as Tish was pushed through the doorway.

  Tish had no chance to reply. She was instantly ambushed by Jules and Mary Jo, who both knelt down and embraced her until her bullet wound ached – in a good way.

  Mary Jo, looking lovely in a black velvet tunic, matching leggings, and flats cried, ‘Oh, how I prayed you’d be back home for Christmas.’

  ‘I just prayed you’d come back home,’ Jules added, a magnificent caricature of himself in a red suit jacket, jeans, white dress shirt, and light-up Christmas tree tie. ‘Honey, if you ever feel badly about not being the most interesting person in town again, let’s talk. You don’t have to be shot at by some scumbag to make the top story. Oh, when I think about what happened … I told you there was something wrong with that man and his menu.’

  ‘And you were right, Jules,’ Tish agreed. Jules, indeed, had an aesthetic sixth sense, but she was not in the mood to discuss it, as they’d already expounded upon the subject at length while she was confined to a hospital bed. ‘By the way, this place looks absolutely fabulous.’

  ‘Thanks! I wanted you to feel like Jimmy Stewart in the finale of It’s a Wonderful Life, minus the quiet desperation and the five o’clock shadow.’

  ‘And the table loaded with cash,’ Mary Jo added.

  ‘Yeah, we don’t have that either.’

  Tish laughed. ‘I’m more than fine with that counter of food and good company. Speaking of which, I can’t believe how many people are here.’

  ‘Oh, that’s mostly the Rufuses,’ Jules explained.

  ‘Guilty,’ Celestine, dressed in an emerald-green blouse, jeans, and her Yuletide jewelry, stepped forward and gave Tish one of her usual bear hugs. ‘Glad to have you home and healthy, sugar.’

  ‘Glad to be home and healthy.’

  ‘I hope you don’t mind me bringing the whole tribe,’ Celestine said as her younger grandchildren took Biscuit, a leash connected to his battery-operated light-up Christmas collar, outside to play in the café’s side garden.

  ‘Of course not – you know you’re family to me.’

  ‘Likewise, darlin’.’ Celestine clasped her hand. ‘That’s why we’re all takin’ your place at the interfaith center tonight.’

  ‘You’re what?’ Tish was incredulous. ‘But your family Christmas Eve tradition—’

  ‘Traditions are good, but sometimes you need to shake things up. My kids and Mr Rufus know how much this place and y’all mean to me. Every day when I get home, I tell them how we laugh and cook and poke fun and cry together. That’s why they helped me make all those cookies and fudge. That’s also why they’re here this evening. Knowin’ Schuyler, Jules, and MJ would be needed here tonight, I talked to my kids about what you’d promised to do down at the interfaith center and we decided to represent the café as a family. My daughters and daughters-in-law all agree that it’s high time the younger ones learn about givin’ back to others. And so, after we fuel up, Team Rufus will be dishin’ up dinners for the less fortunate.’

  Tish was overwhelmed by the Rufuses’ generosity. ‘I don’t know what to say.’

  ‘Don’t say anything yet. Knowin’ my bunch, you might regret this,’ she cackled.

  ‘From what I’ve seen tonight, I sincerely doubt that.’

  ‘Well, maybe not. I only gave Cookin’ the Books aprons to the well-behaved members of the bunch,’ Celestine said with a wink. ‘By the way, y’all are invited to join us for dinner tomorrow. We have two giant hams and all the sides. And we’d love to have you.’

  ‘That’s kind of you, Celestine, but we’re actually sticking to our original plan, except we’re doing it at Schuyler’s as I’ll be living there now.’

  ‘That’s fine … but who’s cookin’ the turkey?’ Celestine glanced nervously at those standing near her.

  Schuyler raised his hand. ‘Me, technically. Tish will be dire
cting me in the kitchen.’

  ‘Well, um, good luck with that, Schuyler.’

  ‘Thanks, I’ll need it.’

  Opal Schaeffer, decked out in a green Peruvian-style printed boiled wool jacket, red broomstick skirt, hobnail boots, and a newspaper boy’s cap, came forth from the crowd, planted a kiss on Tish’s cheek, and placed a clear mesh bag of dried green leaves in her hand. ‘Welcome back, Tish! As much as I adore everyone at the café, this place isn’t the same without you.’

  ‘Hear, hear,’ Jules seconded.

  ‘Aw, thanks, Opal.’ Tish examined the bag the writer had given her. ‘What’s this?’

  ‘My special healing herbal tea, made from yarrow, goldenrod, and calendula. I had some dried flowers in my cellar, so I made a batch just for you. I also brought the squash casserole. It’s made with non-dairy cheese and butter. I’m eager for you to try it.’

  ‘Is that what that is?’ Celestine looked over at the counter. ‘Mr Rufus just put a big helping of it on to his plate. He’s such a picky so-and-so about vegan stuff, I’m gonna have to take a photo of him eatin’ it!’

  She dashed off toward the buffet.

  ‘Since y’all mentioned tea, can I get anyone something to drink?’ Jules offered. ‘I have a pitcher of pomegranate martinis, a batch of warm cranberry-and-apple cider, and hot chocolate, as well as the usual suspects.’

  ‘It’s Christmas Eve. Martini for me, good sir,’ Opal ordered.

  ‘Yes, ma’am,’ Jules jokingly saluted.

  ‘White wine for me,’ Mary Jo requested.

  ‘Cider for me,’ Tish added. ‘They gave me a pain pill this morning. But tomorrow, I will definitely indulge in a cocktail.’

  ‘If Schuyler’s cooking, we might all need to indulge in a cocktail,’ Jules quipped as he made his way to the drinks table.

  ‘Hey, now,’ Schuyler shouted after him as he followed along to assist.

  As Tish, Opal, and Mary Jo were joined by Augusta May and Edwin Wilson, Enid Kemper wandered through the doorway and stood in front of Tish without as much as an ‘excuse me.’ ‘Hmph. You don’t look like someone who’s been shot,’ she assessed.

  ‘Thanks,’ Tish replied.

  ‘I was worried there for a time. Langhorne and I come here for lunch after church each Sunday. It’s the only place that gets Langhorne’s order right. Everyone else overcooks his spaghetti. You serve it al dente.’

  ‘I know how particular Langhorne is about his pasta. Ms Kemper, since you’ve walked all this way, why don’t you fix yourself something to eat?’

  ‘Oh, I couldn’t impose. Did you cook it all?’

  ‘No, I’m not quite up to that just yet, but I’m sure you’ll find everything is quite tasty.’

  ‘Nah, I should get back to Langhorne. He’s covered and tucked in for the night, but one never knows when he might have one of his squawking spells.’

  ‘I understand. I was just hoping you’d help us eat some of this food. We have a ton and I wouldn’t want it to go to waste. There’s even a bowl of salad greens somewhere in there. You could take some home to Langhorne, since it will probably be wilted before the café reopens on Sunday.’

  ‘You say I’d be helping you out?’

  ‘Definitely.’

  ‘Well, in that case …’ She unbuttoned her ragged coat and undid her scarf.

  ‘Thank you, Ms Kemper,’ Tish smiled. ‘And Merry Christmas.’

  Enid Kemper paused for a moment, as if uncertain how to react. A faint smile spread across her lips. ‘Merry Christmas, Tish, and keep out of the line of fire. You should make that your New Year’s resolution.’

  ‘I probably should, Ms Kemper. Now if you go over to the counter, Jules can help you wrap up what you’re taking back to Langhorne.’

  ‘Jules? Is he wearing his elf hat?’ The elderly woman chuckled and shuffled off toward the buffet.

  ‘She must have seen the news broadcast,’ Mary Jo presumed with a laugh.

  ‘I’m pretty certain Enid sees everything,’ Tish remarked.

  ‘Hears everything, too,’ Augusta May commiserated.

  The withered form of Enid Kemper was soon replaced with a quartet of familiar faces.

  ‘Hello.’ Lucinda LeComte stood before Tish, looking glamorous in a white faux-fur jacket and matching hat. She leaned in and planted a kiss on the caterer’s cheek.

  ‘Lucinda,’ Tish greeted before looking up to see the rest of the group. ‘Justin, Ted, Frances! I didn’t realize you were all still in town.’

  ‘We’re not,’ Frances clarified as she also leaned in for a smooch. Dressed in a hot-pink wool coat with a black velvet collar and buttons, a black knit cap, and black leather gloves, she was more relaxed than Tish had ever seen her. ‘We’re all back home, but Williamsburg is just a forty-five-minute drive from here and we felt we needed to be here after all you’ve done for us.’

  ‘Well, I’m not sure what I did to deserve a visit on Christmas Eve, but I’m glad to see everyone. Where are Rolly and Edie?’

  ‘New York City,’ Justin Dange replied, looking equally relaxed in a black puffer jacket and striped scarf. ‘They eloped, but not before Rolly officially closed the theater group down for the entire winter.’

  ‘The entire winter? How does that impact you guys and the venues that were already booked?’

  ‘There were only a handful of venues,’ Ted explained. ‘Rolly just pushed them closer to spring.’

  ‘And as for us, we’re ecstatic,’ Frances added.

  Justin spoke out, ‘We haven’t had a block of time off since—’

  ‘Ever,’ Ted completed the sentence with a chuckle. He too seemed far happier than he had the previous weekend. ‘We’ve never, in the history of the group, had more than two weeks off at a time.’

  ‘I think this whole thing with Jenny and now getting married has made Rolly realize how focused we’ve been on the group to the exclusion of all else,’ Lucinda described. ‘It hasn’t been healthy. For any of us.’

  Frances and Ted registered their agreement.

  ‘So how are you all going to utilize the time?’ Tish asked.

  ‘Well, Edie’s enrolled in some design courses in New York. Meanwhile, Rolly is establishing a student-mentoring program for the group. We all loved the concept of having fresh faces around – they just need to be the right faces – so he’s going to line up some college students for us to audition for the summer season.’

  ‘Lucinda and I are going to finally branch out into other styles of theater,’ Justin said. ‘We have some auditions lined up in New York, so we can visit the newlyweds while we’re there.’

  Tish wished them luck. ‘So you’re traveling together?’

  ‘We are,’ Lucinda confirmed as she reached for Justin’s hand. ‘We’ve been dancing around the prospect of a relationship for so long that we decided to finally take the plunge.’

  ‘Congratulations.’ She turned her eyes toward Ted and Frances.

  ‘I’ve signed up for some sketching and painting classes,’ Frances announced. ‘I’ve always wanted to try my hand, but I was too intimidated.’

  ‘And while Frances is busy creating art, I’ve committed to taking care of the cleaning and dinner preparations,’ Ted inserted.

  ‘And we have a getaway weekend planned for February in Washington, DC. We’ll take in both art and history museums. And then we’ll try to find some things that we enjoy together. It will be our first vacation in—’

  ‘Ever,’ Ted once again completed the sentence. ‘During our marriage, we’ve only ever traveled with the group.’

  ‘So things are good with you two?’ Tish asked.

  ‘We’re taking it one day at a time,’ Frances replied.

  ‘But we both agreed that we had too much history together to just throw it all away,’ Ted expounded. ‘And we have you to thank for that.’

  ‘I think we both also agree that Tish doesn’t need us chewing her ear off any longer. Let’s go get some chow, Ted.’

&
nbsp; Tish laughed. ‘Not at all! It’s been great catching up, but please do get some food. There’s tons of it. Just promise you won’t leave without saying goodbye.’

  ‘Course not. I want to get your cell number so we can keep in touch,’ Frances announced and led Ted to the buffet.

  Tish turned to Justin and Lucinda. ‘I can’t tell you how happy I am to see you together.’

  ‘We’re happy, too,’ Justin confirmed. ‘It’s nice to be in a caring, mature relationship for a change.’

  ‘And one built upon a strong friendship,’ Lucinda added as she clasped his forearm with a gloved hand.

  ‘I’m still terribly sorry about what happened to Jenny,’ Justin admitted. ‘But Lucinda has helped me to see the light. I know I once questioned whether or not Jenny had used me to get into the group and, you know, I don’t think she did. Having learned about her background, I think that acting was her only escape from the past. When I offered her a slot in the group, she saw it as a step forward, but she just couldn’t handle the human relationship aspect of it.’

  ‘I’m no psychologist and I never knew Jenny,’ Tish prefaced, ‘but I’ve spoken with her aunt and sister and I tend to agree with you. After losing her parents and living with sexual abuse, I think she lost herself in the world of theater and cut herself off from anyone who might hurt her. Her craft became the only thing that mattered.’

  ‘Poor kid.’ Justin hung his head.

  Lucinda rubbed his back and gazed at him sympathetically. ‘Speaking of kids,’ she added after several seconds had elapsed, ‘I told Justin about my “little secret.’”

  ‘And?’ Tish urged. ‘Have you decided to approach the courts?’

  Lucinda shook her head. ‘Not yet. I’m leaning that way, but I need to think it through completely. This break is just the thing for that.’

  Justin draped an arm around her shoulders. ‘And whatever Lucinda decides, I’ll be here at her side through all of it. Just as she’s been here for me.’

  ‘That’s good to hear. Have you told Rolly?’ Tish asked.

  ‘Yes,’ she answered. ‘It seemed an odd time to tell him, what with his engagement, but I felt he should know. He was sorry I hadn’t told him sooner and even sorrier that I went through it all on my own, but he understood why I did what I did. He acknowledged that he was a different person back then and that he would have freaked out over the news.’