She pushes her hair back from her face. “Your Dad is starting to get restless. I’m thinking we may take a vacation soon. Don’t worry though,” she rushes ahead. “I’m not angling on trying to go skiing with you and Bri.”
“Good, because you weren’t going to be invited.”
A look of pride appears in her eyes. “I’m glad to hear you say that. You and Bri need a life of your own. There are going to be people who want your lives to mirror mine and your dad’s.”
“I’m already getting that.” I blow out a breath, taking my hat off and scratching my head. “We’ve gotten a lot of offers for us to host things, but it’s things that the two of you have done. No offense, but if we follow your path, how are we going to know what’s best for us?”
“You know by doing the wrong things.”
“The wrong things?”
“Yeah, y’all will figure out what’s important to you the more you do. Some of it will be right, some of it will be wrong. Doing all those wrong things will stand out like a sore thumb.”
Hearing her say this brings me to one of the biggest fears I’ve had, and right now I want her advice, mother to son, with no one else listening. “Do you think we have a shot of making this work?”
“What work? I’m not following.”
This is the moment, the one I’ve been waiting for and dreading at the same time. “Everything. The marriage, the records on our own, living this life. Like are we just setting ourselves for failure? Is this going to hurt in the end? I’m scared,” I finally push the words out, daring to give voice to the thoughts in my head.
“EJ, I don’t know the future, none of us do, but I can tell you this. If you and Bri are willing to work at it, things will end up the way they’re supposed to. None of this is easy.”
“You and Dad made it seem like it was. No matter what the two of you had going on in your lives, you always made us and you a priority.”
She laughs. Harder than I expected. “We made it look easy to you? That makes me feel so much better as a parent, but trust me EJ. None of it was. There were nights I’d cry because I was so stressed. That’s why I ended up stopping while you two were kids.”
This brings up another issue I’ve wanted to ask her for years. “Do you regret it? Stopping everything to take care of us? Did you resent us? I worry Bri will end up resenting me because of what the record company is trying to do to us.”
“If I ever made you feel like I resented you, I’m sorry,” she starts.
“No, you didn’t, but I’m asking if you really did.”
She sighs. “No, I didn’t. I made that decision and I was ready for it. When I had you, you were everything I wanted, EJ. More than anything, I wanted to be there with you. I did one album after you were born, thinking I could be superwoman. Some women can be. Bri might be able to work it out better than I was, but I wasn’t. I wanted to be with you at night, to put you to bed, and to be there when you woke up. It was a personal decision and Garrett supported me. Without him, I couldn’t have done either of the two things. We leaned on each other, big time, and I have a feeling you’ll learn to lean on each other too. Things won’t be perfect, and you have to know life isn’t perfect. But the two of you, you’ll figure it out. Just don’t give up when things get hard.”
“Thanks, Mom.” I stand up, going over to hug her. “All this is everything I needed to hear. Thank you for telling me what I needed to hear, not what I wanted to hear.”
“I love you, EJ, and I want what’s best for you. I truly believe she’s best for you.”
A soft smile crosses my face. “I do too, Mom. I do too.”
Chapter Seventeen
Bri
I’m tired, but in a good way, as I come up the stairs from the basement. In my entire recording career, I’m not sure I’ve ever had anyone listen to me as much as Malcolm did. I feel good about what we’ve done, and more importantly, I’m proud of it.
As I get to the kitchen, I see Everett sitting at the bar, seeming to be waiting for me. He’s playing on his phone, but as soon as he hears me, he puts it down, giving me all his attention.
“What are you doing?” I grin as I take in the sheepish look on Everett’s face. He’s hiding something, and judging by the sparkle in his eyes, whatever it is, is going to be good.
“Inviting you to our backyard for dinner.”
The grin on my face widens. “Dinner?”
“Yeah, you’ve worked hard all day, you deserve not to have to worry about it.”
I wasn’t, but it’s nice to know he thought that far ahead. “Do I need to change or anything?”
His eyes roam my body, taking in the t-shirt and jeans. “No, you’re perfect just the way you are.”
This man.
He can floor me with a look, make my heart flutter with a few words, or melt me with a touch.
I never knew the stuff people talked about or wrote about in love stories was real. It definitely wasn’t for my parents, and even though the two of us have had some issues lately. I wouldn’t trade any of this for anything else in the world.
Getting up from the bar, he comes around and grabs my hand, entwining our fingers together and guiding me toward the backyard. When he opens the French doors, I gasp. He’s turned our fire pit into a romantic spot for two.
There’s a table set up along with candles, tiki torches, pillows, and blankets for us to sit on the ground with one another. “You did this?”
“Why do you seem so surprised? There’s not a lot I wouldn’t do for you.”
His smile is so damn sincere, which makes me smile back at him. “Everett, thank you.”
“Don’t thank me yet.” He winks. “You have no idea my plan for you.”
“No, I don’t, but I’m excited to know what you’ve got going on.”
“You’ll find out.” He helps me sit on the ground, more comfortable than I assumed it would be. Although even if were the most uncomfortable thing in the world, I’d still sit there, just because he did this for me. “I need to go grab the food I got. I didn’t cook.” He drops his chin in a shy gesture.
“I’ll love it, no matter what it is. You went to a lot of trouble, and I appreciate it.”
He leans down, cupping my face with the palms of his hands. “I love you, Bri. Never forget that.”
“I won’t.” Keeping my eyes closed after he pulls back, enjoying the feel of him against me.
My eyes follow him as he jobs to the French doors, and disappears inside. After the day I’ve had my brain is complete mush, but I feel better than I have in years. More productive and more in charge of my destiny than I ever have. Leaning back, I enjoy the cool evening, grateful it’s not too hot here in Tennessee this close to Halloween. When I hear the backdoor shut, I turn. “Do you need help?”
“All you need to do is sit right there. I’m coming to you.”
He carries boxes from our favorite restaurant downtown, placing them on the table in front of us. “Wow, you really went all the way out for this, didn’t you?”
“I was busy this afternoon.”
“So you were.” Quietly I sit back, letting him serve us. When the plates are full, he has a seat next to me, and together we start to eat. “This is so much more than I expected.” I swallow the bite I’ve taken. “What did I do to deserve this?”
“You’re you.” He gives me a bashful smile. “Anyway, I’ve been thinking about what you said. You know the two of us haven’t really had time together for those conversations that most couples do. I want you to know you’re right. I decided to do something about it,” I reach, grabbing an envelope. “This is for you. Well, for us, really.”
My fingers shake as I open what he’s given me. “What’s this?” Pulling the paper out of it, I see a plane ticket and what looks like a hotel reservation. My eyes move across the page, picking out the words Vail, Colorado. “Are you serious? Everett, I’ve never been, but I’ve always wanted to go.”
“I know, I did some research on
your Instagram.”
“Did you?” I’m overwhelmed at the lengths he went to get something I would like. No one has ever made an effort for me like this before.
“Yeah.” He puts his arm around my shoulders. “So the morning after our Halloween party, we’re hopping a plane, and having a long weekend of just us.”
I’m overwhelmed. There’s so much to say, but I don’t have the words. There aren’t enough, even if I did. He took my concerns seriously and then put an action in place. If there were any doubts I had about his love, they’re gone. “Everett,” I trail off. “This means the world to me.”
He scoots forward, using his arms to close me in, surrounding me with his warmth and strength. “You mean the world to me. I think I assumed because everything worked out so well in the beginning, we were just destined to be together without having to put effort forth. I’m sorry for thinking that way. It’s caused a rift and will only harm us in the end. My mind wasn’t where it should have been, but I’m there now.”
“I could’ve been better at the way I questioned you about Kristen. My curiosity came off in a way I didn’t intend for it to, and instead of trying to understand where you were coming from, I leaned in harder to my convictions. Marriage and relationships are work, we’ve been spoiled by the fact everything to this point has seemed to come easy. You’re right, if we want what your parents have, and not the traumatic one mine do, we have to put in the time.”
“So you’ll go with me?” he asks adorably, his bottom lip sticking between his teeth in what can only be described as a sign of vulnerability.
“Yes!” I throw myself into his arms. “Did you think I wouldn’t?”
“I didn’t know, there haven’t been many times where I’ve pissed you off or disappointed you like I did the other day. I honestly didn’t know how you’d react.”
“But this is exactly what I asked you for.” I point out. “How could I not be happy?”
The way he shrugs, with his shoulders hunched around his ears shows more than anything we both have issues to work on. I’m thankful we realized it now, and not years down the road. “I don’t know,” he answers honestly. “Some women in my life have played games, and there was a part of me that wondered if this was one to get me to do what you wanted me to.”
“No.” I reach out, grabbing his hand. “None of this was a game. I want us to have the strongest foundation we can have. That starts with honesty and communication.”
“We got this.” He squeezes my hand with his.
“Isn’t that what your dad always says to your mom?”
“No,” he laughs, rolling his eyes. “He always says I got you.”
“Well,” -I reach up, cupping his cheek in my hand. “ -we got each other.”
“We do.” He leans forward kissing me on the nose. “Always and forever.”
“Always and forever,” I repeat, wanting him to know I’m in this for the long haul. Doesn’t matter how hard it is, or how many times it takes for us to get it right. I’m here, even when he doubts himself.
“Come on, I went to a lot of trouble to get this, when they’re actually closed today.” He points at the food. “Don’t let it get cold.”
With a smile on my face, I dig into the food, beyond happy with my life, and beyond thankful I’ve been given the chance to be with this man. We may have started out in the most unconventional of ways, but more than ever I’m beginning to believe that plan was set forth before we even knew it.
Chapter Eighteen
EJ
“Where are you and Bri going?” Mal asks as he sits in the studio with us a few days later. I know we’re killing him with producing both ours and Bri’s record, but he seems to have been what we all need.
“Colorado. We’re going snowboarding and ya know, to enjoy some quiet time in front of a fire.” The guys all laugh, giving me a hard time as they make lewd noises. Everyone except for RJ, who sits in the corner, sulking. “What’s wrong with you?” I throw a balled-up sweatshirt at him. It’s the one I wore into the studio today, but now I’ve gotten hot as we started recording vocals.
“Don’t throw your sweaty shit at me, just because you’re having a great day doesn’t mean everyone else is.” His scowl rivals that of a five-year-old who hasn’t gotten his way in a few days.
“I don’t know what crawled up your ass, but if you’d been listening, you would know my time with Bri hasn’t been all rainbows and unicorns. If I recall, she told me you’re the one who talked her down from the ledge. What’s happened to you in the last week or so?”
He ignores me, throwing my shirt on the ground, before looking at Mal. “Are you gonna even use me today, dude? I been sitting here for hours. If you don’t want to record guitar parts, at least have the balls to tell me.”
My stomach immediately sinks. This isn’t RJ. This is RJ on a bender, needing something because he’s feeling sick, which makes him mean to everybody in his path. “Don’t be rude to him because you can’t keep your shit together.” I give him a look. “You think people don’t know, Rhett. But they do.”
“Fuck you,” he fires back. “Nobody asked you to be my daddy, I got one of those already.”
Standing up to my full height, I tower over him. “When are you gonna start listening to him and realize you need to grow up.”
He averts his eyes, looking back at Mal. “Still waiting for your answer, dude.”
“We’re definitely not recording you today.” His jawline is hard, set in stone, pissed off at the way RJ’s showing his ass in front of everybody.
“Then I’m out.” He gets up off the chaise.
Instead of letting him pass, I block his way, refusing to let him get away with being this much of an asshole in front of everyone. “You need to apologize to everyone about how you’re acting. You know better than this.”
“Don’t act like you own me, EJ. Both of us know that isn’t the case.”
“What the fuck are you talking about? I’ve never acted like I own you, and I hope I’ve never given you reason to believe I think that. What happened?”
I desperately want him to tell me, to confide in me like he used to when we were kids. At some point he stopped that, and I would give anything to go back to that day. To tell him I’ll be here for him whenever he needs me. That he doesn’t have to stop confiding. I’ll do whatever it takes to help him get through whatever it is that made him question doing it. “Just tell me.”
“You wouldn’t understand.”
“How do you, you never trust me enough to let me help!”
And that’s the crux of our disagreements. He stopped trusting. I don’t know how I’m ever going to get that trust back, when I don’t know what I did to lose it in the first place.
His jaw hardens. “Get out of my way. I don’t wanna mess with you today.”
“I don’t wanna mess with you any days when you’re like this, but here we are. We don’t always get what we want.”
Wounded eyes flash back at me and I’m instantly sorry I let my mouth get in the way of the feelings I have for my younger brother, but he’s not having it.
“Get the fuck outta my way, or I’ll move you myself.”
After all the money we’ve spent to get this studio up to standards and codes, I can’t let him wreck it. I know myself too, I wouldn’t stop until we’re both bleeding and gasping for air. Against my better judgement, I step back.
“That’s what I thought.” He pushes past me.
“I didn’t step away because you scare me, I stepped away because I respect you.”
“That’s horseshit, and both of us know it.”
He leaves, letting the door slam as he pounds up the stairs. Me and the rest of the guys look at each other. We’ve been here before, and judging from the looks around me, we never wanna go back here again.
“You sure you wanna keep doing this?” Mal asks as I fuck up the verse of the song I’m working on. Since RJ left, I’ve struggled. I’m worried about him, and I d
on’t know where he is. Those two things are never great. The other guys have left, leaving me here trying to make these vocals work. I’m not feeling it though, and it’s obvious as my voice cracks. “I’m afraid you’re going to hurt your instrument.”
Truth is, I am too. “Sorry, I just…” I trail off. “I hate when he gets like this.”
“You know you can always see if Montgomery’s heard from him. Every other time I’ve been with you guys in the studio, she’s been right beside him.
“Yeah.” But I don’t want to. I hate to bring her into this. When they broke up last time, it nearly killed the both of them, and I know they’d been working their way back to each other. “I just hate to bother her.”
“She loves him, my man. I don’t think it’s a bother.”
Mind made up, I grab my keys and head upstairs. When I get there, I see a note from Bri saying she’s headed out to get some stuff for our Halloween party. Immediately, all I can think of is the night that Jared almost died. We’ve heard about it over the years, more times than I care to count. It’s supposed to be a cautionary tale for us, but sometimes I get this feel it’s a premonition of what might happen to RJ one day.
Morbid, I know, but he just can’t seem to figure out how to stop.
My biggest fear is he won’t on his own, that his body will give out for him and he won’t have a choice.
Shaking my head, I take the steps into the garage two at a time. If speed limits weren’t a thing, I’d be at Montgomery’s apartment in less than five minutes. But they are, and I find myself cussing every single person I get behind. No one is going fast enough for me. If they only knew the shit I’m going through, they would punch their gas and quit fucking around. At least that’s what I tell myself.
When I finally turn in, I park next to her car, and do my best to wipe the look of absolute terror I’m sure is on my face off. I don’t want to scare her. In fact, it’s the last thing I plan on doing, but someone needs to take this seriously, and I definitely don’t want to worry my parents at this point.
Breach of Contract: A Rocker Romance (The Nashvegas Series Book 2) Page 9
