The Recluse

by D A Rice

  She fished the phone out of her jeans pocket, knocking the quilt off of her as she searched. Lost in her thoughts, she handed it over to Eli. He took it from her, tilting his head in curiosity. His eyes studied her, missing nothing, “you do that a lot, don’t you?” He turned toward the phone, tapped it twice and then skimmed his fingers over it in an intentional way.

  “Do what?” she asked, watching his hands, but not seeing what they were doing. Rei started in realization, “oh I forgot! It has a code to get in!” She held out her hand, but Eli just shook his head, grinning as if at some hidden joke.

  “I already got in,” he glanced up at her as she registered his words. Her eyes widened, impressed, as he clarified, “and I meant getting lost in your own world.”

  Rei furrowed her brows as she watched him turn back to her phone. Then he was tapping it twice and offering it to her casually. “I guess. What did you do?” she took the device from him, unlocking it, and pulling up her contacts, then her browser. Nothing looked like it was messed up. Nothing looked out of place.

  Rei looked up at Eli with so many questions on her lips, but she could tell he wouldn’t answer many. He had been cryptic enough to prove that already. And yet, in a way where he had admitted to nothing outright, he had trusted her with some of his story. She didn’t understand him, but she found she trusted him. Eli had already proven his capacity for goodness by taking care of her when she couldn’t. He could have done so much while Rei was unconscious and he hadn’t. More than that, her gut told her that Eli was safe, that he was important.

  He stood slowly. “Don’t worry; I didn’t break it.” Eli twisted his shoulders over his torso as he spoke, bringing the conversation back to topic. “I didn’t set it to explode either,” he chuckled softly. “I uploaded a sort of virus into it, nothing that will corrupt your phone. It’s just something that, in short, deletes programs that shouldn’t be there. You could say it eats other bugs, much like a real spider. The fact that it corrupts other programs is technically what makes it a virus, but think of it more as malware at the moment.”

  “You debugged this?” she asked looking down at her phone again in surprise. She hadn’t realized that had been necessary, but now that she thought about it, she couldn’t deny Eli’s caution.

  “It’s just a safety precaution for you. If anyone found out you met me and know where, who, what I can do, they will find a way into your phone. It won’t matter if you never see me again. They’ll do it anyway,” he turned to her and offered his hand to help her up. She was still sitting on the mattress on the floor.

  “If something gets uploaded into your phone without your knowledge, this virus will attack it and kick it out. I call it the Black Widow.” Eli was protecting her from his world, she realized. He didn’t comment on why he was doing it or what he thought would happen, and she didn’t ask him to clarify. It was a mutual understanding that he would do what he could, and she trusted that his actions were in her best interest.

  With that last thought in mind, Rei took Eil’s hand, and he pulled her up. She pushed the phone into her pocket as Eli handed Rei her coat. “You know….” he started cautiously, “you shouldn’t try to block it.”

  Her head snapped up in an instant, “what?”

  He smiled, “the voices, the demons. Blocking it only makes it worse.”

  Rei froze in horror as she watched him, eyes wide. How had he known what she had seen? Had she said something in her fit about voices and demons? The hand that wasn’t in Eli’s went straight to her mouth as Rei tried to hold back her tears. It was worse than she‘d imagined. Rei knew she had blacked out from her pain. She knew she had babbled like a fool, but the fact that he knew about the demons had her speechless.

  How functional was she really if a stranger could see straight into her chaotic mind without reserve? She took a small step back, her thoughts throwing her into an internal panic. “You misunderstand,” he said softly stepping up to meet her. Eli squeezed her hand reassuringly, reestablishing the link they had and bringing her back into the here and now. He hadn’t let her go when she had backed away from him, only laced their hands more firmly together. He was providing an anchor for her away from the fear lacing her thoughts in anxiety. “I don’t think you’re crazy, Rei,” his voice was firm.

  “How… How could you not?” Rei was starting to tremble. No one but Damion had seen her episodes, and certainly, no one had figured out how broken her mind was underneath them. Eli had, and still, he hadn’t judged her. Even more, he’d trusted her with his secret after cracking hers wide open. Eli was trusting her as much as he was asking Rei to trust him.

  His free hand touched her cheek gently, making her flinch. Her eyes met his. Eli’s were filled with compassion, without a hint of ridicule for her situation. She felt the peace flow through both their joined hands and the one he had placed on her cheek. It was the same feeling as in her dreams last night when the pain had ceased. Had it come from him then too?

  “Rei, I believe there is more to you than you think,” he took a step back from her, dropping his hands from her as he did. She began to relax as her confusion began to seep away from her. Peace filled the emptiness left behind, even as the connection between them broke.

  “You are not alone. I want you to know that. Which is why I also left you a gift on your phone.” Eli smiled as she glanced down towards her pocket again. “In your notes, you’ll find a piece of binary code, a sort of logic bomb that will trigger when you paste it into your browser. If you ever need me, use it. It’ll send one of my spider programs to find me. I’ll get a hold of you.” He opened the door for her, pausing as his golden eyes settled on hers.

  “Why? Why would you risk this when we only just met?” she asked quietly. She shifted under his intense gaze.

  “Because I trust my instincts. When they tell me to do something, it usually saves my life.” He beckoned her with his fingers, nodding towards the door behind him. “But I will warn you that I’m not going to be answering any personal questions for a while and contact could be scarce. I am, after all, technically still on the run.” He had never denied who he was, nor had he dodged the subject with shifty stories. She would trust him based on that alone. He hadn’t lied to her when he could have.

  She had only just met Eli, but she liked him. She found that her need to protect him had only increased especially now that she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was real. “I understand,” Rei moved towards the door, letting him pull her into the shadows of the stairwell. He grasped her fingers again, boldly interlacing them with his one more time.

  Before he opened the door at the bottom of the stairs, Eli looked back at her. His eyes twinkled as he squeezed her hand again, “and Rei? I think you should ditch the psychiatrist. He’s not the one for you.”

  5

  Nikki Wilkins was a seventeen-year-old at Park East High School. A normal high school for NYC, it had metal detectors and was full to the brim with students from every background. It was an older school built with massive brick walls, but the teachers were decent. It was a school that knew how to take care of itself.

  Nikki was a smaller girl with dark cream-colored skin and black hair that could look like an afro in the right humidity. When she looked in the mirror, she considered herself very ordinary, if a bit shy. Her eyes were caramel brown, and right now, they were focused on the door in front of her. It was open just enough that voices carried through with crystal clarity.

  They called Mr. Lovinski the golden teacher, and everyone, including Nikki, thought he was beautiful. He was in his late twenties or early thirties with high cheekbones and exotic-shaped eyes that were eerily blue. His hair was how he had gotten his nickname though. It was yellowish gold and just long enough to drip into his eyes without his glasses. He pulled off the shaggy, just-rolled-out-of-bed look, while still managing to look sophisticated. He was also intelligent. Many people often speculated at why Mr Lovinski even bothered with this school when it was clear he cou
ld teach college-level courses. He was also Nikki’s English teacher.

  It was long enough after school, however, that no one else was around. Nikki wouldn’t have been there either if she hadn’t left something on her desk crucial to one of her assignments. Mr Lovinksi was her last class of the day. She had run when the bell rang without a second thought. Caught up in the gossip of her two closest friends, Nikki absently left the book behind. Now she paused, hand poised to knock and froze as snippets of conversation passed the threshold.

  “So, you lost her….” came the voice she recognized, smooth as always, but less kind. It was a low, dangerous voice that sent a paralyzing chill through Nikki’s bones.

  “No, I know where they are,” came the response, another young male voice. This one Nikki did not know. She tried to take a step back, but found that her feet couldn’t move. I shouldn’t be here, she thought too late.

  “But she is with him- correct?”

  There was a pause then, “Yes.”

  “How did this happen?”

  “I don’t know. He came out of nowhere, Fenris,” the boy replied, his voice tipped in desperation. He sounds scared, Nikki thought as the voice continued, “What do you want me to do?”

  “I want you to do your job,” came the cold reply, “you will find a way to make her distrust him. Rip them apart, Damion, or I will rip you apart.” Nikki’s eyes widened at the malice in her teacher’s voice. She had never heard it there before, and it terrified her.

  There was a pause in the conversation. “Nicole,” she gasped as Mr Lovinski raised his voice slightly, bringing a little warmth into it. Nikki could still hear the dangerous undertone though, and it made her want to run. “Please come in; your arm must be tired by now.” The door creaked open before her. Willing her body to flee the other way, she found herself taking an involuntary step forward instead. Had he known she was there the whole time? Nikki slowly lowered her arm as she tripped into the classroom a few more steps.

  She had an excuse ready on her lips for why she was there. Finding she was inexplicably terrified of this man she thought she had known, Nikki stumbled over her words. “I am so sorry, Mr L. I just needed to pick up something I left on my desk!” The door slammed shut behind her and she flinched, taking in the scene before her.

  Her teacher sat behind his desk, cold blue eyes studying her behind steepled fingers. The other man was a few years younger than her teacher, closer to twenty if she had to guess. He leaned back against the front row of desks. His arms were crossed, trailing her calmly with emerald eyes. “I – I’ll just grab my book and go…. I’m so sorry for interrupting.”

  “No need to be so frightened, Nikki,” Mr Lovinski said, smiling. He stood and moved around his desk in one fluid motion. Her teacher nodded to the other man, who straightened and with one last glance at her, strode from the room. “However….” His voice was soft now as he gently lifted her chin to meet his gaze an arm’s length away from her. Nikki wanted to move, to escape, but she couldn’t. There was a paralyzing cold seeping into every one of her muscles.

  Mr Lovinski’s fingers were smooth but cool as they met her jawline, “I do think you have heard, and seen, entirely too much.” His hand dropped from her face. His eyes flashed as if they were a cat’s reflecting the moon, before settling back into a blue as deep as an ocean. Nikki could do nothing to look away from them. Entranced, she felt the temperature drop, even more, her breath becoming visible between them. “You and I are going to be very good friends, Nicole Wilkins,” came a voice as the rest of the room darkened in her mind. Numbness took over, shredding her last thoughts into nothing.

  Her throat prickled as it turned to ice, freezing out the scream Nikki held there, a last subconscious effort to rebel against him.

  …

  I think you should ditch the psychiatrist completely.

  Rei sat at a local restaurant, staring at her phone underneath the table, Eli’s voice ringing in her head. She was waiting for her father to join her for their weekly meeting. It was his way of spending time with her as well as checking in on her mind. Some weeks the conversation between them was fluid, others it was halting and awkward. It didn’t matter, she always came, and he always met her.

  Today would be no different. The restaurant was a nice one, and the staff knew how Rei’s dad liked things. When she came, they always directed her to the same table out on the balcony. Rei’s eyes shifted to the view of the city as the sun settled past its zenith, highlighting the landscape. It was less confining out here, and the view enabled her to see New York City from a new perspective. Her dad always made sure they had the balcony for this reason. He said her brain needed the shift sometimes.

  Ditch the psychiatrist…. She couldn’t get Eli’s words out of her head. I don’t think you’re crazy, Rei. I believe there is more to you than you think. In a small way, isn’t that what she had been starting to believe as well? It was as if he could feel the struggle inside her mind. What was real? Now more than ever, she couldn’t be certain.

  “You look lovely today, Anna Rei!” Rei jerked in surprise at her father’s voice. She turned to meet his gaze as he smiled gently at her before sitting down. She played with the hem of her favorite forest green dress. It came down to her knees, covering part of the black leggings beneath. She loved how it bell-bottomed out when she twirled. She smiled at the image in her mind before greeting her dad with a nod.

  Her dad was wearing a button-down white shirt with slacks, as was normal for him. Casual, she thought, is the fact that he isn’t wearing a tie. He was a top lawyer in the city. Taking unique cases that others couldn’t- or wouldn’t- and winning. He was the one people went to when they were told their case was a lost cause. If Theodore Williams said it was a lost cause, then you had no hope left in a courtroom. His photographic memory enabled him to not only know every aspect of the law but made him vicious in any court. Rei’s dad was her hero.

  “I apologize for startling you. Deep in thought?” her dad’s pale blue eyes sparkled at her. While he had a hard, almost cold, reputation in the courtroom, Rei saw a different side to her father. He was softer with her, and she loved him even when he didn’t know how to handle her issues.

  Her hands gripped her phone as she glanced out over the city again. “Just enjoying the view,” she said thoughtfully, silently debating how to start their next conversation. Rei had decided that Eli may be right. She hadn’t really listened to Dr. Heek’s advice for months now. Maybe it was time to find a new psychiatrist, one she actually felt was helping her.

  Her dad watched her before looking out over the balcony himself, his eyes at peace. “I always loved this vantage point.” He smiled, waving down a waitress to order his customary glass of wine. Their weekly meeting was rarely ever on the same day. His schedule was so packed that sometimes he had to reschedule, but he always found room for her somewhere. She knew she was lucky. Not every dad found time for their kids like hers did.

  “Dad, I’ve been thinking,” she started, her eyes shifting to her lap. She paused before forcing the words out, “I don’t know if Dr. Heek is helping me…”

  Her dad watched her over his hands, eyes softening as he studied her. “Does he make you uncomfortable?”

  She knew what he was asking. It was evident in his tone. Was her doctor taking advantage of their alone time together? He wasn’t, and it wasn’t that she was completely uncomfortable around him either. The doctor was nice enough, but something had been tugging at her spirit since before she met Eli. He had just highlighted doubts that were already there. “It’s not that,” she spoke now, “I just don’t feel like I’m making much progress with him.”

  “Are you taking the medications he gave you?” her dad’s tone shifted, and she cringed internally. He wasn’t the top lawyer in the city for nothing. His instincts were usually spot on. He was always finding the weak spot in his opponents and brutally laying it bare for everyone to see. Her dad valued the truth above all things, inside the courtr
oom and out. She would be truthful with him now.

  “You mean the medications that numb me to the point of incapacity?” she asked, trying to keep the sarcasm out of her voice. It wasn’t her dad’s fault Rei hated them, but she needed to make him see why she did. “No, I’m not taking them.”

  “I know you don’t like them,” her dad countered, closing his eyes as if bracing himself for the inevitable argument to follow. “Dr. Heek says that your body just needs time to adjust to them.”

  She shook her head, “maybe, but dad I can’t go to school and take those drugs at the same time. My mind shuts down. I miss long periods of time when I take them. I took them for three weeks straight and had days go missing in between. I can’t do that again. Not if I want to graduate on time and with full honors.” She sighed deeply, making herself calm before meeting his gaze again. “Those drugs aren’t helping me.”

  Her dad shifted thoughtfully, his hand raking through his greying light brown hair. “I get it, Anna Rei,” his voice was quiet and full of compassion, even if her name had some tension behind it. “But maybe it’s time to take a leave from school for a while. Maybe we should give your body and mind the time they need to adjust.”

  Rei’s eyes narrowed, “you know I won’t do that, dad.”

  He watched her before sighing, “alright. I’ll look into somebody else taking over your care. Maybe we can find a different medication, or method, or something. But you can’t go without at least seeing someone.” He took a sip from his wine. Rei noted that the waitress had brought it while they were talking. “Everyone needs to talk things through with someone.” His voice turned gentle again, thoughtful even.