Westmore Wolves Series: Shapesifter Collection Bks 1-5
Page 29
Bastard.
Not that he’d ever said anything, but it was something she’d always taken for granted. Graduate from college, marry Reid, start a family…and so on. All her future plans had worked out so well in her head. If only she’d shared her grand plan with Reid before he lip-locked with that sultry she-wolf. Now the only snuggles she had to look forward to were the dogs and cats in her care.
Carrick kept trying to get her to give up her work at the shelter, but it was the one part of her life she had control over. No way was she going to do that. All the animals she’d helped to rescue and find forever homes for mattered, despite the assholes who threw them away. She knew how that felt. No male in his right mind would mate with her, the she-wolf who couldn’t shift. Not even Reid.
Let them think that. It was easier than the truth.
Just this morning Helga, one of the older wolves, had clucked when she observed Jess sitting in the garden at Westmore House with her coffee. Sage had been on the warpath, armed with glitter and holiday decorations in preparation for the pack to arrive, and Jess hadn’t wanted to be anywhere near that. So outside it was for a quiet moment in the crisp December air and then off to her self-defense class and then the shelter. At least, it had started out quiet.
The woman had approached, with several slices of bread in her hand, no doubt heading to the small pond down the main path. Wherever she went, the underage population of the estate was sure to follow. The pond was filled with ducks, and the pack children loved to feed them and give chase if the birds weren’t smart enough to get up and out of the way.
“You need to shift, girl. You are killing the beast inside of you with each moon you deny her.”
“Thanks for that.” Jess had frowned into her coffee. She hadn’t needed a lecture. Not this early.
“Fine. Suit yourself, but I’ve been watching how you pine after Reid. He isn’t for you.”
“Yeah,” she’d replied. “I got that memo, loud and clear.”
“There is someone out there for you, honey. Just you wait and see.” The older woman had gazed down at her and for a second Jess had worried she could see into the darker parts of her soul but she broke eye contact and turned her face to the woods.
“Thanks for the vote of confidence, Helga, but I’m not so sure there’s going to be much in my Christmas stocking but chocolate Santas and a candy cane.”
The older woman then laughed, shaking her head.
“Listen to your wolf, girl, or you’ll regret it.” Then Helga had shuffled off, whistling to herself, a gaggle of kids bursting out of the house behind her. Surprisingly no one else had been about, so she’d dumped her foul-tasting coffee, nabbed her purse, and headed out before Sage could commandeer her. With guests coming, there was a multitude of things to do at the pack house and she’d just as soon let the new Alpha female take over. Event planning, she’d found out, was not her strong suit and that was perfectly fine with her.
Hours later she still tasted that horrible coffee and wished she’d gone to Hot Whips. God, she really couldn’t wait to visit Mel after the adoption drive and get something better than grocery store drip. The stuff was going to eat the lining in her stomach if she wasn’t careful. Besides, having a demon for a best friend was a plus. Cranky as hell, Mel always made her feel better when pack politics and her brother started to drive her a little insane. She also made the best brownies, which Jess was totally going to need after the day she was having. And peppermint bark. It was one of her favorite things during the holidays, and Sage made the best bark ever. Melty chocolate. Crunchy peppermint. Oh man. Just thinking about it cheered her up.
And Jess was going to have to tell Sage whoever had been making the morning coffee at the house needed to be fired. Like yesterday.
Jess tried to resume her work, but Helga’s words nagged at her. She was in touch with her inner wolf just fine, thank you very much. Just because she didn’t want to get buck naked and run bare assed through the woods once a month didn’t mean she didn’t talk to her inner animal. Quite the contrary.
Jess couldn’t get her wolf to shut up. And that scared the ever-loving shit out of her.
These days the wolf’s voice was very persistent. A one-word mantra, it was starting to get on her nerves.
Mate.
Like she needed that complication in her life. But nature was nature and she was twenty-seven. Long past time most females in the pack had settled down and found their mates. But she didn’t want to just fold to any stud muffin wolf who happened to swing his dick in her direction and crook his finger for her to follow. Fuck that. She was her own woman and damn it, she knew where to find batteries if she needed…well…that.
She’d never dated. Not really. It hadn’t been something she’d felt comfortable doing. Reid had always been there. A steady presence that had morphed into an excuse not to seek male attention.
Jess hadn’t really admitted it to herself, until now.
For her, finding a mate was impossible. Justin, the previous pack leader, had seen to that. The moment his name scalded her brain, she pushed it out with a vengeance.
It was easier to be alone. There was no other way. Not for her.
But her wolf seemed to have other ideas. She wanted a man. Like yesterday. Fevered dreams that twisted from desire to nightmare scenarios haunted her. Three weeks of it. Either she was going to have to get a battery-operated boyfriend for real or she was going to have do something drastic. She’d heard about a shifter dating service a few towns over and well…damn. That she didn’t want to do. Couldn’t do.
Even considering it was tantamount to insanity. The only person who might have understood had gone and gotten himself mated to another wolf and now here she was alone.
Snapping a metal crate flat, she winced as she inadvertently bent part of it. A curse stilled on her lips, fading when she saw her friend’s eyes glued to the puppy and his new owners.
That was why she was here. Doing good for others, not feeling sorry for her own lot in life. So, she went to bed alone. Plenty of people did. It wasn’t a total tragedy. She had friends, a full schedule of things to do, and at the end of the day there were always smutty romance novels and chocolate.
And now that it was the holidays…she would stock up on that peppermint bark.
“Now that’s just cute.” Dawn folded up a metal dog crate and laid it down on the towel-covered, green metal cart.
Jess sighed. She needed to stop feeling sorry for herself and enjoy the holidays. The pack would be coming. Sage would be making treats and life would get back to normal. Whatever that was.
She was still going to order a mechanical friend. In fact, she might just do that tonight when she got home to make sure her season was, um…merry and bright. A couple of orgasms and she’d be right as rain. Only, she was wearing out her back massager and well, it wasn’t helping her scratch her itch as good as it used to.
Dawn glanced at her and she shook her head, getting her mind out of the gutter.
“It is.” Jess reached for a cat carrier and sighed. Ten critters had found homes tonight. Six cats and four dogs, to be exact. The Holiday Adopt a Pet drive had always done well, but this year Barks had really pulled in with the support and now, for the first time in months, the Morningside Shelter had been cleaned out—lock, stock and kittens.
The store was quiet now and when Jess glanced at her watch, she was surprised to find it was already five minutes to nine.
“I can’t believe we found homes for them all.” Dawn stretched and tossed the stack of paperwork into the box. “I hope Mrs. Danforth doesn’t decide to bring Bella back. That poor schnauzer has been shuffled around to four homes now.”
“I know.” Irritation slid through her. Bella was such a sweet dog. “She’s just a little…exuberant.”
Dawn grinned. “Yes. And don’t get your fingers in the way of a dog biscuit or you’ll pull back a nub.”
“You got that right.”
“I can’t remember a
time when we adopted everyone out.” Jess waited for Dawn to put the last metal crate on the cart and sat the cat carrier on top.
“I don’t think we ever have.” Dawn reached for the boxes of pet snacks and cleaning products. “It will be a good holiday for them. I really hope they’ve found their forever homes.”
“Me, too. Especially Bella.”
“Yep. Those people are saints.” They loaded the last of the crates and fences and rolled their cart to the front of the store. Jeanie, the manager, gave them a distracted wave as a last minute shopper peppered her with questions about a carpet stain remover.
“God love that woman. She has the patience of Job.”
Jess snorted and pushed the cart out into the chill of the evening. Dawn’s van was just ahead.
“You need any help bringing this back to the shelter?”
Dawn shook her head, her cat shifter eyes glinting in the hazy yellow lights of the parking lot. She pulled the cart up to the van and unlocked it. “Nope. Why don’t you head on home? Didn’t you say you had company coming for the holidays?”
Jess nodded. “Yep. Pack gathering.”
“Oh…another one?” Dawn made a face and heaved some of the boxes inside the van. “I thought Carrick just had one of his parties.”
“They did. For the wedding and another one before that, when he had to pick a mate.”
“That’s right. I remember that now.” Dawn hefted some equipment into the van. “How’s it going with the new sister-in-law?”
“Fine. As long as I don’t stand too still and look like a tree.”
“Funny.” Dawn cocked her head. “You sure? You’ve been awfully quiet tonight.”
“It’s fine. I’m just tired. And I didn’t much chance to eat before the holiday decoration hootenanny started.” Jess lifted the last of the crates and handed them to Dawn so she could load them. With a deft movement, she folded the rolling cart back into the green dolly.
“Going to stop over at Hot Whips?”
She hadn’t intended to, but as she took in the holiday lights running down Main Street it might not be a bad way to put off going home. Lord knows what Sage had done to the place while she’d been gone. And having Sage at home meant cinnamon scones any time she wanted them. Not to mention all the other delectable goodies coming out of the kitchen.
“I think I will. A peppermint mocha and some soup sound like a great way to end the day.”
Dawn grinned and walked around to the driver’s side of the van, unlocking the door. “Good. You go. Enjoy the night. I’m going to drop the van off and I’ll unload it in the morning. Say hello to Carrick and Sage for me.”
“I will.”
Jess swiveled around and made her way through the parking lot, her footsteps echoing in the hushed night as she heard Dawn’s van hum off into the distance.
Her wolf paced beneath her skin, ever vigilant but always silent. But still, she felt eyes on her as she made her way through the dimly lit parking lot. Her anxiety climbing, she forced herself to calm down.
“Gingersnaps. Coconut macarons. Chocolate chip. Peanut butter.” There. Speaking in cookie always helped. You couldn’t be scared if you were thinking of frosted Santa sugar cookies or brownies shaped like fugly holiday sweaters with gumdrops all over them. It just wasn’t physically possible.
Her stomach growled, reminding her once again that she hadn’t eaten.
She glowered at her inner wolf and trudged ahead, the sound of her boots against the sidewalk way too loud in the soft hum of the night.
Westmore was quiet but she loved its quaint streets and homely atmosphere. Two small towns over from the estate, she’d never understood why the pack wasn’t named for the closest municipality. But she preferred Westmore to Beacon or Rushmore. Besides, being a Beacon or a Rushmore wolf sounded like a weird cheerleading squad or team mascot.
And here she never felt afraid. Until tonight. Carrick thought she was unaffected by what happened to Sage and the new girl…God. What was her name? She worked for Sage as a barista at Hot Whips. Oh. Yeah. Her name was Violet and she made the best frosted root beer floats ever. Maybe she would have that with a bowl of soup if the girl was on shift.
No. She wasn’t unaffected. If anything, it had brought back her nightmares full force. To think that the old dragon on the fire squad had been in league with…oh God. She wasn’t going there. Not again. Sage was home safely harassing everyone with her holiday decorations and the new girl was fine. But she wasn’t going to wallow in fear.
A noise behind her made her stiffen again and a new litany of cookies slipped from her lips.
“Snickerdoodles. Apple crisps. Gingersnaps. Pumpkin spice.”
There was a reason she had a stack of cookie cookbooks by her bed, and they weren’t for the recipes. That and she had about ten boards on Pinterest set up with different types when she was really bad.
Anxiety sucked. Big time.
Bar cookies. Cut outs. Refrigerator cookies and the plain old ones you just made and threw on a baking sheet. She could recite for hours. It gave her something to do in the dark when she couldn’t sleep and she had to keep her demons at bay.
“Change for me, sweetness…I’ll make your wolf howl.”
Justin’s smarmy voice slithered through her mind and she cried out, nearly stumbling. His fingers in her hair, jerking her head back. Hands on her flesh, hot breath in her ear.
No. Not tonight.
She squeezed her eyes shut and drew her hands into fists, the nails biting into her palms. Flashbacks sucked and she always got them when she was stressed and the holidays could, and did, make them worse.
“Molasses. Cranberry fucking orange. Chocolate crinkle.” Jess’s eyes prickled and she took in a ragged breath. One of them was dead. Carrick had seen to that. There were others that Jess would never forget but if she couldn’t even walk down the street, that meant they’d won and she wasn’t having that. She’d given up enough of her life.
Sage had moved on. Hell, she’d even gotten a tattoo on the spot where one of them had tried to mark her as mate. All Jess had been able to do was memorize a litany of cookies and try to cope with the horrors of those weeks the best way she knew how.
She’d seen Jessica Jones. She knew how fear worked and how you could talk your way down from the memories that made you want to run screaming in the night. So, she spoke in cookies and rescued puppies and to hell with Carrick if he didn’t like it. She might not be a superhero, but she could make a difference and save those who needed saving.
Her wolf paced beneath her skin and yipped at her to keep moving.
“You would pick tonight to be edgy, wouldn’t you? Let’s just walk to the café, okay? Maybe if you’re good I’ll order a nice raw hunk of meat just for you,” Jess ground out, the slight chill of the December air making her shiver. It occurred to her that she’d left her jacket on the front seat of the truck. No matter. She’d get it in the morning. No doubt there would be other calls and she would be out all day.
Her muscles were sore but she tried to still her mind and let the small town atmosphere roll over her. She left her car in Barks’ parking lot and sucked in a crisp breath of air as she took in the sights and sounds of the holidays. Ornate gaslights trimmed with greenery and red bows lined the streets, and the scent of cinnamon wafted on the breeze. Up ahead was the Hot Whips Café and she was ready for something hot and a moment of peace.
The only warning she got was the smallest sound of a shoe on the sidewalk behind her.
A hand grasped her from behind and she let out a curse, stomping backward with her booted foot as she turned to face her attacker.
Chapter Three
Thorne tracked the woman from the deserted parking lot, watching her as she helped another woman load the van with what appeared to be dog crates. Then the van drove off, leaving her alone. Did she not understand the threat to her safety? He’d met many like her in his early years as a paid for hire goon. Entitled princesses with little a
wareness for their surroundings or the people that happened to inhabit it.
Spoiled, the lot of them. And he didn’t expect much different based on the information from his new employer. What kind of brat chewed through bodyguard after bodyguard unless she was a spoiled little bitch with a mean streak as long as it was wide? He cherished women, but he’d also learned to steer clear of a certain type.
She didn’t dress the part, at least. A long button-down red, white, and green plaid shirt rolled up at the elbows over what looked to be some sort of form-fitting tank top. Jeans completed the outfit and her long brown hair was done up in some sort of messy bun, tendrils of hair escaping the clip to fall around her face as she worked. When the other woman left and she started to walk out of the parking lot, he scented something in the breeze that made him pause.
The stink of hybrid wolf seared his nostrils and he growled, his teeth growing sharp in his mouth, wings pulling against his clothing with the urge to break free. His nails sharpened to talons and he stared at the hidden shadows that held the danger.
The threat to the woman he was supposed to protect from any and all harm.
Then another scent took him over…sweet and savory like burnt maple and brown sugar, and it made him hunger.
His groin tightened and his inner beast took notice, the urge to sink his teeth into her shoulder and claim her striking him like a physical blow.
No.
She was a job. Nothing more, and he needed to keep his hands to himself. Carrick would fucking tear his throat out if anything out of the ordinary happened with his sister, of that he was certain.
Thorne was out of the shadows and mere steps behind her before he was even aware of doing so. He reached out to touch her and, the moment his fingers touched her flesh, he felt the contact deep in his bones. Startled, he opened his mouth to give her a piece of his mind when her foot slammed down on the top of his boot. Hard.
“What the fuck?”
Pain shot through his foot and he staggered backwards, his hand coming to rest on one of the antique light poles. He lifted his nose to the air but the acrid scent of the interloper was gone. In its place was the intoxicating scent of a female wolf.