The Chameleon Man
Page 3
interested.
"I kinda like the act," he said. "If you could find time to be nice tome I might like it a whole lot."
Alice takes her hand back as if it had accidentally brushed somethingslimy.
"I'm sorry but I don't go with the act," she snapped. "There are somethings worth more to me than three meals a day and a paycheck."
"Okay, sister," Morry said without expression. He turned to me. "GuessI made a mistake coming up here. The act is lousy."
"Now wait a minute," I yelled. "You said it was good. You can't walkout now." I wheeled to Alice. "Baby, baby, don't do this to me. Tellhim you're sorry."
Mystiffio came up behind us while we were talking.
"What is the matter?" he asked. I noticed he put an arm around Alice'sshoulders. I was too distraught to think about it.
"Nothing's wrong," I said desperately. "Alice just took offense atsomething Morry said. Nobody meant any harm."
Mystiffio drew himself up straight and he grabbed Morry by the lapels.Morry struggled to free himself but he was pinioned helplessly.
"You cad! You bounder!" Mystiffio roared. "Do you mean you've beenmaking advances to my daughter?"
Daughter! How do you like that! That just goes to show you never totrust people.
Morry pulled himself loose.
"You're all crazy," he shouted. "Lemme out of here."
He wheeled and started away, but before he had taken two strides hecollided with a solid, unyielding, invisible substance.
He backed away a few steps, his mouth working in terror.
"What is it?" he screamed.
"I'm sorry," Horatio's voice sounded in the air a few feet from Morry.
Morry's face went white; he stared wildly about for another instantand then charged madly out of the theatre, screaming in terror.
* * * * *
I chased after him, but it was a hopeless effort. When I got to thesidewalk he was gone. Moodily I slumped back into the theatre and wentbackstage. My big opportunity was gone, but I still had Horatio.
I found Alice in the office and she was alone. She smiled sweetly whenshe saw me.
"You too, Brutus," I muttered. Then I thought about my meal ticket andlooked worriedly around the room.
"Where's Horatio?" I snapped.
"Horatio," she smiled, "is gone. Too bad you missed him. He would haveliked to say goodbye."
"Goodbye!" I shrieked. "Where's he going?"
"Into the Army," Alice said sweetly. "Isn't it wonderful?"
"You're crazy," I shouted. "The Army won't take him."
"I arranged a little something for him," Alice said. "I'm sure he'llbe very useful in the camouflage department."
_Camouflage!_
I groaned and sank into a chair.
"Yes," Alice said pleasantly, "when he learned that Mystiffio was myfather--not my husband as you so cleverly told him--he was quite angryfor a while. But of course he felt better when he thought it over. Andhe was very happy to take my suggestion to apply for a commission inthe camouflage. I think Horatio and I are going to get along nicely."
I groaned again.
Mystiffio stuck his head in the door.
"Goodbye," he said. "Ready, dear?"
"Yes," Alice said, moving to the door. "I'm ready."
"Now wait a minute," I cried. "Where are you two going? You're thelast act I've got."
"I am enlisting!" Mystiffio said proudly.
"As what?"
"Signal corps, in charge of messenger pigeons."
Mystiffio flapped his coat tail and a lone pigeon fluttered into theair. "I've had a lot of experience with the little devils."
I groaned again and dropped my head in my hands.
What was left?
When I looked up, Mystiffio and Alice had gone.
For a moment I sat there staring about the quiet dusty office. Then Istood up and I knew what I was going to do.
I put my hat on and walked out of the building. I didn't stop walkinguntil I reached the Marine recruiting office. A big poster said, "TheMarines Promise You Action!"
I walked in. Nothing could be worse than what I'd just been through. Ifelt contented for the first time in sixteen years.
* * * * *