Gabe watched Tanner spin around in a circle, taking it all in and likely imagining just what Gabe was describing. Gabe could almost still hear the screams.
"If Phaleg knew he was causing all of this, then why did he stick around? Couldn't he have left or destroyed himself somehow, so the suffering could end?"
Gabe had something come to mind, though it wasn't at all the truth because he knew the why of it all, the true why, but it was a pretty thing to think about as he looked at the pretty, passionate boy in front of him and cupped his face gently, bringing his focus back.
"I think maybe he must have loved someone," Gabe offered before placing his lips ever so gently on top of Tanner's in an abandon his heart had been longing for.
Part 4:
Alexandra
Chapter 12
Angels are like diamonds. They can't be made, you have to find them. Each one is unique. ~Jaclyn Smith
ALEXANDRA looked around her in annoyance. She was on edge, antsy, and she didn't even know why. What she did know is watching the two couples that she was the fifth wheel for now made her feel beyond awkward. The first reason was the simple fact that she was alone. It seemed like she was the odd one out. Add that to the fact that she was the only one still without powers. She was ready to pull her hair out and scream about being a misfit because she was tired of it.
Everyone looked to her as some kind of leader, but she felt like she couldn't do that without more information and certainly not with everyone huddled in corners, hearts thumping for one another. Not that there was anything wrong with falling in love. It was a pure and beautiful feeling, not to be confused with any mistakes made in the process of choosing the wrong person. The heart itself was a lovely place that came from innocence and peace. There were some outside factors, though, that just seemed to get in the way so often and break two people apart.
It also felt awkward because she knew that it bothered the rest of them a little, knowing that she was alone and likely longing for someone she didn't even know anymore, if she could trust he was even still alive. Either way she wouldn't be in anyone's arms or whispering into their ears. She had no one specific to share this grief and frustration with. The only bright spot that came to mind was a risky choice. If she didn't do something about it, she was certain to lose her mind and wouldn't do anyone any good.
Alex stood up suddenly and walked towards the door, not caring whose eyes were on her. She was not up for answering for herself anymore. She had a feeling much of this journey she would still be facing alone in some way, and she needed to prepare for it.
She swung the door open and startled the angel, Cassiel, waiting outside. "Don't tell me you want to go on a walk too. Look, we can't just let you run around here like this. Your freedom is limited, and you are all still unaware of so many things," he scolded.
Alex pursed her lips in annoyance. "I want to be escorted to meet with Emuriel, unless that is a problem," she told him, keeping her back straight and her head high.
"Oh, well that's something different. He told me to be sure any time you wanted to speak with him to make him available to you. So, both your wishes will be met in this regard," he offered, bowing his head accordingly before leading the way.
Instead of going into what she referred to in her head as the throne room, they took a turn just to the left, and Cassiel reached up to the seemingly even and empty ceiling. But with just one touch, a staircase came down that had not been there before. "Where does this lead?" she asked, trying to glance up unable to tell.
"It is a favorite spot of Emuriel’s to relax when he does have the time to do so. You can think of it as being above, perhaps on the roof of this building if you need a human explanation, but that barely fits it," Cassiel said, his brow wrinkling. Funny that even angel faces did that.
"I will just see for myself then, lead the way," she added nervously, not wanting to anger any of Emuriel’s subordinates, and not just because of what punishment might happen. Something in her wanted to please Emuriel, though she didn't know why.
She followed up what was at least five flights of stairs before they hit a small landing, one that just continued to lead upwards from there. She found that while she was a bit bored of climbing, she was not tired, another good effect of being around light angels apparently.
Alex followed him yet again, wondering when the staircase ends, and she was reminded of a popular Led Zeppelin song that was older than her parents were and wondered if that was where this staircase was leading; up to Heaven or close to the gates. It wasn't like that wouldn't be a possibility for Emuriel with him being the leader of the Revenant. She found it hard to imagine anyone more pure or beautiful than him.
Alex felt herself disoriented as she was surrounded by cool wisps of things...clouds possibly? Had they really gone that high up? She made her way through them until she saw the expanse of his wings standing out amongst it all, his hand behind his head while the other seemed to trace intricate art into what was above him. "Hello?" she asked, tentatively approaching him.
He did not make a move but did speak directly to her. "I was wondering when I might see you again, Alexandra." What was it with these angels wanting to call her by her given name instead of Alex? Not that she could complain about the way her full name sounded dripping off their tongues, but it was so odd sometimes.
:You were?" she asked, trying to find a relaxing spot next to him, though she was afraid what would happen if the cloud below her dissipated. Was there a ground to save her, or would she tumble to her death?
"You don't have to worry about your safety up here. You're safe as long as I am here," he told her as if reading her mind. She relaxed, unable to look away from his features to see what he was drawing in the sky. There was an obsession building, with him, inside of her. He was fascinating, but of course angels fascinated her. They had from the first time she saw Amon. It wasn't that she had become at least infatuated with yet another one, but there was something about his presence that was much more calming than anything else. It was like he reached into her soul and weathered the storm inside of it, for her.
"And yes,” he began, prompting her to look up and see her own face having been carved into the cloud above him, "I have been waiting to see you again. I told you that you were special, and I do not use words lightly. It is not in my way or my job description," he said with a half smile creeping up one side of his perfect face.
"I don't know what to say to that. I never thought of myself as something special."
His hand reached out and brushed the skin along her hand, and she shivered. A complete relaxed state like she had never known came over her. "That is exactly why you are special, Alexandra. You have so much to offer and don't even act like you deserve anything in return for it." Her heart was unusually warmed by the statement, and she was both afraid and excited at the same time. Just think, she could be something else there than just a mentor of some kind. Could a light angel have feelings for her?
Never in her life did she think she would find herself being pursued by three distinct men, much less that they would all be supernatural beings.
"Then, I want to know everything," she said, not being afraid to confront that anymore. "I want you to tell me everything from the beginning, Emuriel. If I am so special, I need to know if I am to find the inner strength to continue to be."
"Very well, I would much rather spend a little time getting to know you first, and you me. Isn't that where the beginning should always be?" Emuriel asked with a full smile this time, the fear of his features subsiding to look more boyish and alluring than his usual hardness.
"I think I can handle that," she told him. "But I would think you would already know a lot about me."
"Unfortunately, we do not have time to spy on pretty girls all the time," Emuriel teased. "I know about what you have been going through for a bit, but I do not know every little thing about your life before now, before the truth began to come to you," he admitted, making her laugh a litt
le at his poorly hidden compliment.
Alex began to tell Emuriel all that she could remember from her younger years. She was glad she found it easier to remember some of it than she had before. Maybe she needed distance from Kingsbridge to get it back. It was good to talk about the people she had left behind and give life to them, especially to the Revenant; those who so clearly held their fates in their hands.
She was so happy and had almost forgotten about all of her burdens, she had lost track of time there with him, and it was nice. It was nice for just a few moments of time not to care, hurt, feel trapped, or feel like the fifth wheel anymore. She doubted they were missing her either. They probably had their own little moments with each other.
"So, tell me about the Revenant," she finally said. "I don't feel like I understand what you all do."
Emuriel turned silent and serious for a moment. "I am trying to decide how to explain it to you in a way you can comprehend. We have many jobs, there are many of us. We were created to help watch over all the worlds. I assume by now you understand that yours is not the only one in existence; there are many. I don't mean just planets, I mean worlds. So, this universe, or this corner of it, does not look that same as your corner of it. None of them know of each other, and they operate entirely independently. It is our job to see to it that justice and fairness prevail over all the worlds as much as possible, without making it known that we interfere."
Alex's mind was blown by that. It sounded that they had limitations, maybe not to their power but to what they were allowed to use it on. "So, miracles, you have to be careful with them, but you make them happen?" she inquired, trying to make sense of it.
"I guess that is a part of it. We also oversee laws and the creation of any beings, to make sure any are not created with unfair disadvantages or advantages."
"So, the equality police," Alex joked, and Emuriel actually rewarded her with a laugh.
"Something like that."
“So, how did you end up being chosen to lead them all?” Alex asked him curiously. Not that she could imagine any other choice.
“The Revenant has had many leaders, and I am just the latest in a long line. We often choose from within ones who would do the job the most justice. The position used to be appointed, but that is too far back even for my memory. I only know because of the records we keep. Many make the mistake of believing all the angels were created at once, but that is not the case. Some come to us from Earth if they have earned their wings so to speak. Other are made when they are needed. I don't believe any have been made in a long time, but we do still have the occasional mortal being joining us, typically humans, or what we would all qualify as human, even if they are from different worlds, like yourself and Gabe.”
There it was again, the hint that she could be like him. It was appealing to her more and more.
“So, I could be like you. Would I be a part of the Revenant?”
“That's hard to say because there are many other things that must be done. I would hope I would have some pull; I could keep you with us.” His voice was soft and vulnerable, and she found her body covered in goosebumps as she turned her head back towards the layer of clouds drifting above them. Soon allowing a dreamless sleep to overtake her, one she had been longing for since they arrived.
Chapter 13
Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth. ~Buddha
ALEX felt that her heart had lightened as she made her move on the chess board in front of her, playing a good game against Gabe, of all people. Apparently, he enjoyed playing chess and other board games. The more she saw Emuriel and became okay with the idea of letting go and getting to know him and trust him, the more freedom they were all allowed. They had been given the freedom to wander more during the day, and they had been allowed to find both a game room and a pool house. Alex got the feeling they were illusions, created by the angels for their benefit. She doubted they were used to entertaining a bunch of humans, and she wondered what they did for fun, if they were ever allowed to have any.
Carlie was in the corner with a paddle ball, and Nick and Tanner were playing cards on the other side at a small card table. The room was white like everything else, but all the games actually had color, which was a nice break from the starkness of the rest of their lives. Alex's hair was still wet from a dive in the pool earlier that morning, and she found her mind distracted as she went to make another move on the board.
Emuriel was beginning to take up space in her mind where someone else used to be, as someone else she had sequestered to a tiny pinprick of her that she didn't pull out or open up unless it was necessary. She hoped, in time, the pain would subside whether because she got to go back successfully, or the truth was a harsh one and Emuriel helped her to heal from it.
"Checkmate," Gabe said suddenly, and she grimaced as she tried to figure out how to get out of his little trap. He had won three times already out of four games. She was rooting for another win.
Before she could complain or concede, an angel came into the room, one of the ones she recognized as being a guard that usually watched over Emuriel and his dealings. "Sorry for the interruption, but when you have a moment, Alexandra, Emuriel has requested your presence today." Alex nodded, unable to hold back her smile at the thought of seeing him yet again. Being in his presence, it was like a drug, and she was happy to be on it. There was no dangerous high or crash. It was just perfect.
After the guard left, she got a nasty glare from Carlie. "Is there something going on between the two of you? I really don't understand why you need to keep seeing him alone. I mean, isn't Amon why we're here."
Alex sucked in a breath at the mention of his name. She hated the way it sent everything flooding back for her to close up and put on lockdown again. How was she ever to get over him if everyone kept bringing him up?
"I don't even know if he is alive, Carlie. I don't know if we will ever get to go back."
"It's just that we watched how devastated you were to leave him. We waited to leave Kingsbridge because of him. It's hard to see you with someone else, especially so soon," Tanner offered as a buffer, giving his own explanation for their prying into her business.
"I think it's a good thing," Gabe weighed in, and she offered a thanks to him for that. He wasn't usually on her side, but it was nice to have him there this time. "It is a pure bond that would form between the two of them since he is not just a light angel, but the leader of the light angels. He could have no ill intent, no tricks, and it would heal her. It’s likely for the best anyway since it’s Alex who will make the ultimate decision whether or not you will end up back on your home planet and what will become of it."
Alex was taken aback by that statement, unsure what to think. "What do you mean by that? Why would it be up to me if we are all prisoners here?"
Gabe sighed. "I thought it was clear by now that you are not prisoners, but refugees and students that have a lot to learn. Those with ignorance tend to be dangerous in the beginning." He shrugged. That still told her nothing of what he had meant. "That's all I know on the matter. From what I understand, it will be up to Alex to eventually make the decision about the world you came from. I was supposed to do the same, only it was too late by the time they got here, and there was pretty much no one left to save, no point in asking. Why would I want to bring back or save a world that was up in smoke?" he asked to himself.
Alex looked around and gasped, choking, feeling even more of a weight on her shoulders. She didn't get why everything kept landing on her, especially with no powers to speak of. She just wanted to be a girl in love, with a special power she could use for good. She didn't care about any of the rest at the moment. It didn't matter what she cared about when greatness was being thrust upon her in the form of obligations.
There was something else to all of this, and she felt like it was time to see Emuriel sooner rather than later, to get her answers. She brushed her fingers through her hair to make sure she was presentable and s
tood up, no explanation owed to the others on where she was going to go.
She could not find Emuriel in his throne room, however, and she was confused, looking around to see if the stairs were out, or anything else that might lead her to him.
"Where is Emuriel? he asked to see me," she told the nearest guard, and he led her instead to the pool house where she had come from that morning. She wasn't sure what to make of it, but she followed him in there only to find a sight that made her heart get caught in her throat.
Emuriel was in the water, his golden hair dripping with droplets of dew. His wings spread out to help him swim, gliding as graceful as a swan over the waves. In fact, he reminded her more of a merman in that moment than anything else. When he turned around to face her, the glow of his face where the water hit it seemed beautifully blinding. Alex didn't know how to react or how she was to go any further into the room, but the presence of the guard was gone.
"I have placed a suit right there for you," Emuriel said, his voice echoing through the large room, glowing with his natural light.
Alex nodded fervently and went to grab it, glad for his complete respect as she changed into it; of course, he would respect her privacy, he was an angel.
She waded into the water, finding it to be not too cold or too hot as she stepped into it, and she stopped to wait and see if her ripple would reach him and make him turn around.
She watched stunned as he did turn around and come towards her with his graceful, long strokes, out of breath from his glory. She had almost forgotten her question when he came right up to her, his face closer than it had ever been. Then, his finger held her chin up to look at him, water dripping off of his body and onto her. She didn't feel the blinding passion that took over her the way she had with Amon, but she did feel something. It was a want to taste his lips, a want for him to want her, and a deep-seated desire to be by his side. "Something is troubling you today. What is it?" he asked her with a furrowed brow.
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