Spring Blossoms at Mill Grange

by Jenny Kane

  Thea didn’t say anything. She didn’t need to. She knew Shaun was right.

  After another painfully long silence, Shaun asked, ‘His email, did you reply to it?’

  ‘No. I told you I wanted to talk to you first.’ Thea exhaled. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you straightaway. I thought I was doing the right thing. I was wrong. I just wanted us to have a nice time together without Julian ruining it.’ She turned to look at him. ‘I’m not sure how many more times I can apologise for that.’

  Shaun shuffled up on the bench closer to Thea. ‘The question is, what do we do about this?’

  Thea stiffened. Does he mean us or Julian?

  She licked her lips, her words coming out as a frightened squeak. ‘About us?’

  Shaun turned to look at her. ‘I meant Julian, but yes, the question of us is there too.’

  The warmth from Shaun’s leg buffering against her own seeped through her suddenly cold flesh. It gave her a tiny edge of hope. She longed to fling her arms around him, but pride stopped her. You didn’t do anything other than what you thought was best. You were wrong but you admitted that and you said sorry.

  Not knowing what to say, afraid that whatever came out of her mouth would be the wrong thing, Thea looked across the garden. She could see Tina and Sam walking from the kitchen to the walled garden. They had an arm around each other’s waist, as they chatted. We were like that. Thea battled the urge to cry as she averted her eyes from her friends.

  ‘They look happy, don’t they?’ Shaun’s words took Thea by surprise.

  ‘They are happy.’

  ‘Funny how happiness can be so easily broken.’

  ‘It isn’t funny at all.’ Thea’s shoulders clenched at the implication.

  ‘No, it isn’t.’ Shaun sighed. ‘And to think, if Julian hadn’t fancied you, none of this would have happened.’

  ‘What?’ The tear on Thea’s cheek froze as she turned to face him, anger overtaking her grief. ‘You think Julian only wants me to be a presenter because he fancies me, not because I’m any good at it.’

  ‘I didn’t say you weren’t good at it, but if you didn’t press his buttons so much, and always do what he bloody well asks.’ Shaun knew he was being unfair, but his bruised ego and sore heart had taken control of his tongue. ‘Yes, Julian, certainly Julian… You’re like a lovestruck groupie!’

  Thea’s mouth opened and closed in shock. Clenching her hands into fists, she spoke slowly and deliberately. ‘Look, Shaun, my intentions were good but went wrong – it really is that simple. If you truly believe what you just said, then I’d like you to leave me alone – permanently. But if you’re prepared to admit you were just talking bollocks and still love me, you know where to find me. Now,’ Thea stood up with as much dignity as she could muster, ‘if you’ll excuse me, I promised Tina I’d help clean the house.’

  Thirty-nine

  Wednesday April 8th

  Tom smiled as he read the text message. Sue had found his dress uniform in a box in her attic. He was contemplating whether Helen might have a thing about uniforms, when he reached the store room door.

  ‘Helen, I—’ Tom stopped talking. She wasn’t there. Somehow the space felt emptier than normal. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up as he looked around him. Nothing was missing.

  Telling himself she’d just popped to the bathroom, Tom was about to leave when he saw a sealed white envelope addressed to Sam and Tina on the desk.

  Lifting the envelope, Tom was aware of his heart beating faster. ‘Why has she left a letter for…?’ His sentence trailed off as a horrible suspicion trickled down his spine.

  She hasn’t gone. She hasn’t.

  He ran from the office to the back of the house. There was an empty space where Helen’s Land Rover should have been. Tom’s pulse accelerated as he spun on the balls of his boots and hurtled around the outside of the house, keeping going until he crashed through the gate of the walled garden.

  ‘Tom?’ At the sound of running footsteps, Sam was immediately on the alert. ‘What’s happened?’

  ‘Helen.’ He said nothing else as he thrust the letter in Sam’s direction.

  Picking up on Tom’s unspoken fear, Sam ripped the envelope open, holding the letter so all three of them could see it.

  Dear Sam and Tina,

  Thank you for allowing me to work in your beautiful home and offering me the chance to stay.

  I’m sorry I have messed you around. I promise that was never my intention.

  The decision to leave was not an easy one, but it’s best for everyone I love that I return to Bath.

  Please accept my apologises for missing your wedding. I have left a cheque covering the cost of the dress. Perhaps Mabel knows someone who’d benefit from wearing it.

  With love and regret,

  Helen xx

  Tina removed the cheque from the envelope and held it up to Sam.

  Tom stared at them in horror. ‘What does she mean, it’s best for everyone she loves?’ He glared at the piece of paper as it was an exploded bomb. ‘She’d decided to stay, to make a life here. She told me.’

  Sam and Tina exchanged glances, neither knowing what to say. But before they could speak, Tom was sprinting from the garden.

  He took the main stairs two treads at a time. When he reached her bedroom door he hesitated. She had to be inside. She just had to be. Surely there would have been a letter for him too if she’d really gone.

  Her coat and boots were gone. Her rucksack was missing. There were no clothes in her wardrobe, and the chair that had doubled as her desk since Dylan’s arrival, held nothing except for a half-used box of tissues.

  There was an envelope on the bed.

  Tom’s hands shook as he picked it up, his forehead creasing into dark lines. How had he messed this up? His mind leapt through every past crime he’d committed in the name of relationships, but he couldn’t think of anything he’d done to upset Helen.

  His throat dry, his clumsy fingers, Tom undid the envelope.

  Dear Tom,

  I’ve gone back to Bath.

  As much as I love you, I love Dylan too – so I had to go.

  I know you’ll understand why.

  H xx

  He turned the paper over in the hope of there being more, but there was nothing else. She’d written more to Tina and Sam than to him.

  The paper curled under his grasp as he read it again.

  ‘No, I bloody well don’t understand why!’

  Clutching the letter, Tom rushed back to Helen’s desk in the store room. There was something he needed to check.

  He’d been sure nothing had been removed from her office, but perhaps one thing had gone. And if she’d taken that, then maybe she did love them. Maybe she had gone for them – and not because he’d done something wrong. But why leave? Why not just talk to me?

  Passing a pale-faced Tina in the hallway, Tom dashed on by, not wanting to talk yet. He didn’t stop until he was back in the store room.

  He sat on Helen’s chair and stared at the desk. You said you’d stay. You said you’d take the job and stay here with me and Dylan.

  The book research and her notebook weren’t there, although that hadn’t surprised him before. He’d assumed they were in her room. Now he thought they had to be with Helen on her way to Bath. No, in Bath – it only took two hours to get there. His hand automatically went to the car keys in his pocket. He checked the time, he could be there in… No I can’t. Dylan.

  Thinking of his son took him back to the reason he’d rushed back to Helen’s desk in the first place.

  The stone was gone. The stone Dylan had given Helen. She’d taken it with her.

  Massaging his temples, Tom stared at the keys in his hand. ‘I don’t even know where she lives and I can hardly barge into the Roman Baths and demand to see her. Can I?’

  *

  Despite scrubbing her face repeatedly, Thea’s complexion remained tight from the tears she’d allowed herself to shed aft
er leaving Shaun on the bench. Heading towards the kitchen, ready to apologise to Tina for being late on clean-up parade, Thea almost collided with her friend in the doorway.

  ‘Oh God, I’m sorry.’ Thea was about to explain her absence when she spotted Tina’s drawn expression. ‘What is it?’

  ‘Helen’s gone.’

  ‘What do you mean, gone?’ Thea scrubbed at her sore eyes.

  ‘Back to Bath. She left a note for me and Sam and went. God knows when.’

  ‘I heard a door close around midnight.’ Thea’s hand came to her mouth. ‘At first I thought it was Shaun. Then I thought maybe I’d imagined it.’

  Tina tilted her head as she regarded her friend. ‘You slept on the sofa, not Shaun?’

  Blushing, Thea nodded. ‘I was hoping no one had found the blankets.’

  ‘Are you alright?’ Tina looked at her friend. ‘That was a stupid question. I can see you’re not. Do you want to talk about it?’

  ‘Yes. No. I don’t know.’ Thea pushed her shoulders back. ‘But my problems can wait. Tell me about Helen? Does Tom know?’

  ‘Yes. He found the note for me and Sam, and then dashed off again. Presumably to see if she’d left one for him.’ Tina passed the letter to Thea. ‘Looks like you’ll be facing bridesmaid duty solo after all.’

  Thea’s mouth opened as she read. ‘What does she mean, she’s gone as it’s best for the people she loves?’

  ‘That’s what Tom wanted to know. I can only assume she means him and Dylan.’ Tina checked to make sure they weren’t being overheard. ‘While you were away, Helen confided that she was worried about getting together with Tom because it was all happening so quickly.’

  ‘And with a built-in step-son.’ Thea groaned. ‘Not that Dylan isn’t lovely, but—’

  ‘Exactly. From no relationship to a complete family in a few weeks.’ Tina headed into the kitchen and poured Thea a glass of water. ‘When we were trying on dresses, she was very subdued.’

  ‘Yes, but I just assumed she was out of her comfort zone. Helen is not one for dressing up beyond the requirements of a business suit.’

  ‘And now she’ll have to go back to business suits every day.’ Tina shook her head. ‘I can’t imagine Helen behind a desk.’

  ‘If she really has gone to Bath, the team at the Roman Baths will be glad to have her back.’ Thea took a sip of water. ‘I should have spent more time talking to her. We’re good friends, we worked together for years, but since Shaun and I got back from the Cotswolds, there doesn’t seem to have been a minute, and now…’

  Tina gave Thea a hug, asking gently, ‘Where is Shaun?’

  ‘I left him on a bench in the garden. I hoped he’d follow me in, but I haven’t seen him so…’ Her throat closed in on itself as she mumbled, ‘perhaps we aren’t a couple anymore either.’

  ‘But that’s ridiculous!’ Tina suddenly saw her entire wedding party dissolving before her eyes. ‘What happened?’

  ‘I’ll tell you later. First,’ Thea brushed her hands together, ‘we find Tom and make sure he’s alright. Then we check that Dylan isn’t exhausting Mabel, and, well, the house still needs cleaning.’

  *

  Sam took a packet of chocolate biscuits out to the table where Dylan and Mabel were enjoying a mid-morning snack.

  The boy’s eyes lit up. ‘Mum says chocolate biscuits are only for when I’ve been very good.’

  ‘And you have been very good. You’ve worked hard in the garden this morning. I think you’ve earned a biscuit.’ Sam made eye contact with Mabel, knowing there was no way she wouldn’t have picked up on something being wrong from all the running around. ‘Would you be a good boy again, Dylan, and stay here while I have a quick chat with Mabel?’

  ‘Okay.’ The boy was chomping his way through his biscuit before Mabel had risen to her feet.

  As soon as they were out of earshot, Mabel was as no-nonsense as ever. ‘Something has happened. In fact, two things have happened.’

  ‘Two things?’ Sam frowned.

  ‘Yes.’ Mabel nodded. ‘Tom first. What’s happened there?’

  ‘Helen’s gone back to Bath. She left a note, but it didn’t explain why she’d gone. Just that it was for the best.’

  ‘And naturally Tom wants to go after her.’

  ‘He hasn’t said so, although I’m sure he does, but—’

  ‘He can’t leave Dylan.’ Mabel looked over her shoulder to the lad munching a second biscuit. ‘Tell him to go. Dylan can stay with Bert and me tonight. Or here if you guys think it’s best he has his own room.’

  ‘Thanks, Mabel. I hoped you’d say that. I’ll go and tell Tom.’

  Sam was a few steps away when he turned back. ‘You said two things had happened. What’s the other thing?’

  ‘Sometimes I think men are born with atmosphere blindness.’

  ‘Sorry?’

  ‘Thea and Shaun. They’ve been sat over on the bench. Well, they were until Thea headed indoors, probably to have a good cry. The air out here has been heavy with their quiet rowing.’

  ‘Shaun and Thea?’

  ‘Yes.’ Mabel looked troubled. ‘I think they might have broken up.’

  Forty

  Wednesday April 8th

  Tom pulled his old Fiesta onto the inside lane of the motorway. His ears strained to hear the instructions from his sat nav, which, at some point over the past ten miles, he’d managed to knock so that the volume was barely audible.

  Thea’s hastily jotted “how to find Helen’s house” instructions sat on the passenger seat next to him, just in case his mobile battery died or the signal gave out.

  Easing off the accelerator, Tom saw the junction to Bath ahead. What if she slams the door in my face?

  The closer he got to Bath, the more Tom wondered if Tina and Thea were right. They were convinced Helen had gone because she didn’t think she was good enough to be a step-parent to Dylan.

  But she must know that Dylan adores her?

  Squashing down the guilt at abandoning his son, Tom tried to read the sudden barrage of signposts which had come at him after exiting the motorway, while straining to hear the sat nav at the same time.

  Turning with the traffic onto London Road, Tom caught sight of a brown tourist sign for the Roman Baths and Bath Abbey out of the corner of his eye. His heart lurched. He might not know where he was, but he knew he was close to where he needed to be.

  *

  ‘I must be the most selfish person in the world.’

  Gertrude and Mavis looked up from where they’d been happily pecking at their grain, tilting their necks in Tina’s direction.

  ‘Thea and Shaun might have split up and Helen’s done a bunk, and I’m stood here worrying about my wedding.’

  Gertrude took a half-hearted stab at a slice of pepper with her beak.

  ‘What if Sam and I have to get married with the best man and bridesmaid not talking to each other, and the usher heartbroken because the other bridesmaid is missing?’

  A well-timed squawk from Tony Stark, Mill Grange’s resident rooster, told Tina to go and talk to her chief bridesmaid.

  ‘But I don’t know what to say.’ Tina sighed. ‘This time yesterday I thought everyone was okay. How can I not have noticed my friends were unhappy?’

  *

  Thea had not expected to hear laughter, especially not coming from Shaun. She could hear him and Sam, alongside Dylan’s giggling, just beyond the manor’s backdoor.

  Pausing, her heart thudding, she listened to the sound of happiness that was just out of reach. Thea was about to go and see what they were up to, when something stopped her. What if my arriving ruins their fun? The idea that Shaun might stop what he was doing and walk off at the sight of her made her feel sick.

  Consumed by misery, Thea didn’t hear Tina’s footsteps as she emerged from the kitchen.

  ‘I was about to ask if you were okay,’ Tina paused, taking in her friend’s tired eyes, ‘but that would be a stupid question.’

&n
bsp; ‘I should have listened to Helen.’ Thea flexed and unflexed her hands, trying to stop them shaking. ‘I was trying to do the right thing.’

  Not knowing what Thea was talking about, Tina asked, ‘But that right thing went wrong?’

  ‘Yes.’

  A fresh burst of laughter came from outside. Tina stepped forward to see what was happening. But Thea put her arm out to stop her.

  Backing away from the door, Thea muttered, ‘If I go out there the fun will be ruined. You go, I’ll see you later.’

  Tina took a gentle hold of her friend’s arm. ‘No, we’ll go together.’

  ‘But—’

  ‘But nothing. Shaun is a grown up, he won’t ruin whatever fun Dylan is having just because you two have had a row.’

  Before Thea could protest, she found herself being propelled along in Tina’s light, but insistent, grasp.

  The scene that met them, made Thea smile despite herself.

  Dylan was covered from head to toe in bubbles. Helping Sam and Shaun to wash all the mud and leaves from the driveway had developed into something far more exciting.

  Sam, who was adorned with a spattering of stray bubbles, grinned as he saw them. ‘I think it’s safe to say we used rather too much washing up liquid.’

  Tina laughed. ‘That’s an understatement. What did you do, drop the bottle in the bucket?’

  ‘Yes!’ Dylan giggled as he did a little jig. Bubbles flew off him in all directions, making them laugh out loud.

  ‘How on earth did you get so covered, Dylan?’ Not ready to acknowledge Shaun, Thea focused on the little boy.

  ‘I was sweeping. My brush hit the buckets and some bubbles flew up and hit my nose.’ Dylan could hardly talk for giggling. ‘Then I got decorated.’

  ‘Decorated?’ Tina raised a questioning eyebrow.

  ‘We decided he looked good in white foam.’ Sam winked. ‘I think we might have got a bit carried away, Dylan mate.’

  ‘Aww, does that mean I can’t be a bubble monster anymore?’ He did another jig, sending globules of foam dancing across the air where they landed on his spectators.