Dear Dawn

by Aileen Wuornos

  . . . Sometimes: In a clearance of forestry – to get a good run. Then: to only reach brush an shrub, trugging through it with extreme difficulty. While my cuts just stung. It was a terrible acheing mess. . . . . . when.

  Boom!.

  I fell on another coiled up spool of razor. Cussing up a storm!. As I pushed myself off, and could relate (to the feeling) of the suffering of the cuts, bruises, and impalements Jesus bore by the hands of such Earthly forces.

  I could’nt believe it!.

  I was just a runaway. This was my crime. “Runaway” . . .

  I was pissed. It was insane. And then trappin the woods to catch an, Adolescent, . . . Like this!. I thought: Are you crazy folks (or) what!?. Geeeez!.

  . . . And the damage being extensive just to help their hounds catch its prey.

  To do then . . . what!?.

  Abuse the hell out of once its caught.

  Well they were’nt going to get me!. . . .

  It became useless, to hope the pain would end.... The throbs tore through me.

  . . . But I was strung out to get away from that School and back on home. As home was Troy Itself. So I kept haulin ass through everything! . . . . . , . . .

  When Low an Behold . . . another swirl I’d smack into!. Again!.

  God was I mad. Woooooo!

  This time landing – spread eagle. Arms extended. Legs extended. pillow case went flyin. And there I was . . .

  Boy was I ever!

  I pushed myself off, as cloth sounds ripped through the cool of the midnight air. As I could hear the hounds gainin . . .

  I immediately changed course.... I went straight for the highway.

  The start of my plan’s from the get go. To clear 3 miles of wood then hit the highway . . .

  I figured the most I gained was ½ mile or so. As I kept cutting through the woods in my cut up mess., searching blindly for the highway like a bat outta hell an a scared rabbit., as well.

  To Be Continued

  Love

  Aileen

  5-5-99

  . . . J/

  Still on 3rd Run

  Searching for signs of any highway nearby, I could hear the distant sounds of traffic and smell their fumes, so knew I was getting near . . .

  But there was this one huge gouge – gored along my right Wrist (inside) ... that left me in fear of bleeding to death. . . .

  Only to then frantically pull off my T-shirt, rip a piece off., and hopefully put a good tourniquet on it to stop the flow.

  . . . I hit pay dirt. There it was! Without a car in sight. And while I stood upon the road, from the light of the moon, for the first time could see the damage done over my clothes, shoes, everything!. . . . I could hear the hounds off in the distance . . . Thinkin . . . No way am I headin back in them woods. But did see a good size tree full of leaves and limbs and started up it.

  So I sat up in that tree waitin for em. . . . tryin hard to hide the pillow case full of blood drops an smears of, with my arms crossed over it, and legs drawn up, hopin to cover its view. . . .

  . . . I could hear their voices now, as well as the dogs panting ... there were, 2 guys with 2 dogs. . . .

  . . . The dogs picked up my scent an raced to the tree, barkin up it. Viciously!.

  I freaked!. Ō My God!.

  figurin surely I was busted.

  Locked eye to eye, there we were, starein at each other, sayin nothing. . . . Then the other guy asked . . . If I was up there, as he kept shinein his small flashlight at me. . . . only to then pull it away from me to other parts of the tree and say. No.... I think the hounds are barkin at a raccoon or a squirrel or somethin. But I don’t see her....

  I was . . . Awestruck!. Totally wiped out.

  what!? I said to myself. what the hell!?.

  I stayed up in that tree to., just incase there was anymore on their way. But there were none. As the fat fellas with their dogs were back not 20 minutes later it seemed.... They passed right on by heading back towards the School, with just one quick glance up by the one who let me go. And when he did – I swear I saw a smirk on his face. Then out of sight they were, gone for good as I climbed down and headed north on the highway., out of town. Feeling this time, a sure freshness of freedom.

  To Be Continued

  Love

  Aileen

  5-16-99

  Dear Dawn,

  . . . The visit with Arlene went OK . . . I kept our secrets to ourselves . . . She had nothing to say. Nothing! . . . And since I did all the talking. I talked about my fallen angels theory. Chuckle. Chuckle . . .

  Can I be just honest with ya.

  OK here goes. I hate visits...

  I do Dawn!. And with Arlene. She’s committing herself to one day every month. O my god . . .

  She was really sweet. But it doesnt matter in all her Kindness . . . I still feel a fishiness there. So Ill be really careful of info. Matter of fact . . . Ill give her the opposite . . . Great strategy A!? I think So . . . But don’t worry!. I’m all in control on this. For real . . .

  Love, Aileen,

  [5-16-99]

  K/

  End of 3rd Run and the School

  As for anymore runnin. I could’nt!. I was tuckered out! My condition was rapidly deteriorating, ...

  Id have to take cover in the nearby ditches whenever a car came by. Then once it was gone!. I’d strut myself back up on the highway an head for homeward bound.

  It was a slow process. Being so tattered an Battered.... [I] could see way up in the distance (a) beam of rays – glowing . . . Hoping it’d be a closed gas station., . . . most gas stations were leaving their restrooms open for the public.

  . . . when I finally reached its sight spread across the midnight blue.... I came upon a Drive in., ...

  I began to receive the most wildest stares., . . . I knew I’d have to do everything fast.

  Reaching the rest rooms, ... you wouldn’t believe what I saw!.

  Upon first notice, was my hair. It was bunched together in one matted mess – complete with sweat an blood....

  . . . My face. I could see whip lash lines across my cheeks and forehead by all the branches . . .

  . . . Lordy My arms, Front, Back, and Legs were scratched, scraped, beatin bloody an blue – from the gouges off the razor wire spools....

  I know I had to get with it though and move fast... I started hideing in one of the stalls and proceeded to wipe the blood off my torn up bod.

  . . . changeing clothes was’nt easy....

  . . . I could hear girls comin an goin . . . when suddenly I heard this soft voice whisperin at the door.

  . . . [asking] if I needed any help. And then proceeded to ask me if I was from the School just a mile down the road.

  . . . Me and my boyfriend want to help you out . . . My niece was in there.... [We] will take ya anywhere ya need to go....

  . . . I was so grateful, as we split—with (a) Cop being seen passing as we left . . . I wound up spendin the night at their place . . . . . . Being that she was a nurse, and him a fire fighter. I was . . . Awestruck too all over again....

  A gaurdian angel perhaps!?. As I then immediately thought of Mom.

  The next morning, as they said they’d do, plans were on the way to drive me into Troy, a good 75 miles away.... She was determined I’d receive a tetnas shot.... I was then on my way home – Just as happy as a lark . . . feeling now free as a bird. Only to then be homefree for a while from this wicked School, full of haunt left in reserve.

  Epilogue

  To make it a bit shorter towards the end here. I wound up gone for 3 weeks, then busted, only to be sent back to Adrian again.... My counselor . . . cut a deal with me and said “If you don’t (run) and do a full 60 more days (without incident) will let ya go.”

  I excepted her offer . . .

  As for any more spooky experiences. No ghost showed up. But the sounds off the walls and doors in the halls – kept bangin. . . . Then after 60 days, arriveing in Dad’s maverick was Keith an Lori to p
ick me up, and off I was to a party once we hit Troy. Weee hooooo. And so goes the story of Adrian my friend of a school that was full of spooky surprizes. The End

  Love Aileen,

  6-14-99

  Dear Dawn,

  Howdy!. So hows thee ol’ wheather up there!? Hope your all doin fine. I myself went to Burmuda. Had a Ball. Now I’m on my way to St. Thomas. I hear the water is crystal blue. O La La. Sounds serene. See ya! Chhhhh . . .

  Say.... Have you heard at all from Alexander. I’ve been thinkin since we have a New Govenor171 it might be / Wise, to try him out now and about this shit goin on here at B.C.i. After all, I hung up on the.... Rich fella . . . chuckle. chuckle. / when he was ready to investigate this place. / a hummm, ū feel like given him a ring? Besides I came up with a plan., if I was to ever get a New trial., just what I’d do with it . . .

  Lets say I’m granted a New trial. And I take the Testimonial box . . . and when the guy comes up to swear me in.... Ill say!. / Is this in the “Name of God” (or) “Man.” This oath “to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth.” When he says In the name of God. Then that’s when I’m gonna say / Well then, let me teach all of you, then, about fearing God !. Above Man. And lieing! Cause that’s all you’ve been doing to the jurors, as well as the world in those camera’s . . . Makein their ass’s look.... Soooo Wōe Wōe Corrupt!

  So whatta ya think!? Great idea!?. . . .A!? Ha Ha Ha. Myself . . . I think its an, Excellent Idea!. But keep it to yourself. Don’t even dare say any of this to Alexander. OK!? . . .

  Say by the way.... when ya call Alexander, remember to let him know that . . . the Govenor told [the media] that if any Correctional officers or any part of the prison system is Abuseing inmates he’ll conduct a full investigation. As I

  say, Well Mr. Bush. Your going to need to here., No doubt. So . . . this is another reason I’m “playing on to a New trial” . . . Love Aileen

  6-16-99

  Dear Dawn,

  Helloooo! And hows my beloved sis doin!?. Gōōōōd I hope!.... They had a company out in Daytona on Ridgewood ave I tried gettin a job at long ago and far away! . . . and wound up instead gettin a job as a Topless Bartender at a juke named Sam’s.

  What!?

  Chhhhhh. Yeah., had to bend . . . real low ya know, I was hard up back then . . . So I for a while was a Topless Bartender. That is until, “Bike Week” . . . 2 creeps came up to the bar – Drunk Royal ...

  Well recognizin there 2 like that I began to tell em there gonna have to be 86D/ . So as I started to . . . one of em sloushed outta their minds said. Bitch! I’m Mouse and this is my partner in the outlaws Motherfucker! Now if you don’t give me and my pal here another drink . . . were gonna tear this bar down ya hear! Not get us both our drinks and shut your mouth!

  God! I was shell-shocked. Shittin purple nickels. Only 2 weeks on the job. And first time I’ve ever been a Bartender. Man . . . I didn’t know what to do! So ... then I figured. OK. Just to keep the peace from a riot. Give em there drinks. Then of-course I had to call the manager, and he came in and took over. God was I embarrassed. I wanted to pound those 2 bastards in the ground if only I could! Had I of been the hulk ... I would of! Geeeeez! humph. So. that was quiet an experience. . . . . FOR SURE.

  Anyway! Such was some of my jobs in Daytona. As I was also a Topless dancer for one solid day. God that’s all I could handle. I was full of shame and stage fright, Royal!. Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ō was I. I held on for an 8 hour shift . . . Got 80 bucks for it. And that’s all she wrote. Chuckle. Chuckle. I quit!.

  Now I know your sayin to yourself . . . what about hooken. Didn’t it embarrass you then (or) anything!?.

  Well Dawn. No. If your thinkin it because of the way I worked as a hooker.

  I did it in a way that wouldn’t embarrass me / useing this hitch hikeing method. See. This method first of all . . . with everyone passin ya by had them basically thinking . . . That’s all your doin/? . . .

  So its like all these “guys” knew what I was doin! And that just didn’t bother me at all! I was just one of the guys (so to speak). And plus they were guys of which who knows guys any better then me! I know very well how they tick. Haveing drug myself through so many personalities and all. So haveing them eventually learn what I was really doin out there wasn’t a problem. It was “Society” as a whole! . . . So this “Hooken” (in) incognito Worked! . . . when I headed back in town. – Daytona . . . I kept it all under my hat. There was’nt hardly a soul that knew this was how I was bringin home the bacon . . . I could relax and not feel ashamed., See!. So its different altogether from. “Street hooken.” and “Topless Joints with all the slut and trash.”

  Well lordy . . . did I drift off with ya in this letter or what!? . . .

  I just finished Revelations – Rereading it over for probably the 15th time of my life. If you keep that fallen Angel theory in mind and NOW that we have a glimpse of high tech to “Visualize” space Vehicles from beyond and H-bombs, and all . . . Then it all seems clearer. As it all seems to say. Nuclear Fall-out!. and Space Vehicles! Rescueing believers as well as fireing back at Satan and the unbelievers in warfare . . .

  Ill catch ya in the next kite . . .

  Until Next time!

  . . . I Love ya Buddy

  Aileen,

  6-19-99

  Dear Dawn,

  . . . god am I ever glad you married Dave. He’s so good. Say! Have you guys ever fought? I mean duked it!?. Ty and I fought just once out of the whole 4 ½ years together. But even then it was’nt really a fight. It was more like a push and shove gig. Lasted like only 3 minutes tops. We were soooo close. Really could’nt hurt each other no matter what. Yet I sure did . . . eventually. By this mess. So Bummer. For sure.

  You probably received Arlenes letter by now before this one. And even though she seems to sound sincere. Well. / See during the visit I asked if she’d send 200 every 3 months. She agreed to . . . as you see – she only sent a 100 . . . I’m playin along. Cause maybe. Just maybe., Ill reach her with “God” . . .

  . . . sure am bummed to hear Daves been layed off. ō man. I hope you guys make it through alright!.... I remember when my Dad got layed off – Beaver Percissions. He blew it!. He got so angry because he’s been there 15 years.... that when they asked him to come on back, biz picked up, he refused. Thats when the house fell apart too. All things then went down hill. So . . . Thank God Daves so, Intelligently strong willed and one cool headed Man . . .

  Love

  Aileen

  6-27-99

  Dear Dawn,

  . . . Say . . . I heard the minimum wage went up . . . I remember my highest payin job I had in—79—was . . . 750 an hour. I was a Welding inspector for bellows. These deals went in military stuff and even space shuttles., at Nasa . . . How I [got fired] was because I allowed the people welding – to skip re-welds. Instead of sending the part to them to do over again! . . . I’d put the part in the – Melt down box., to be remolded to a disc . . .

  Someone got wind of it. Ran to the boss. And the next thing I know, I was called in his office to be fired. Darn! It was a dam good job ...

  Anyway! Surely if I still was at Belfab in Daytona, I’d be makin 14 bucks an hour by now – ya know!....

  Love ya all

  Until next flight in.

  Catch ya then, Love ya

  Buddy!. Aileen,

  7-5-99

  3 pic’s and 2 clips enclosed

  Dear Dawn,

  . . . Say . . . Remember the song.... Slow ride by Fog Hat.!?. . . .

  I was in my teens thumbin to Lauderdale when off of I-95 early in the evening came this boss lookin vehicle – simuliar to this one enclosed. And guess who it was who picked me up!.

  Still guessing!? Good. Keep on for at least 5 more minutes!.

  Aileeeeeeen!. . . . Geeeeeez!.

  Chhhhhccchhhhccchhhh. ok ok ok ok.

  Turn the page. And don’t get jealous.

  It was.... Lonesome Dave . . . Lead Vocal’s for Fog ha
t!.

  FOR REAL

  He took me over to his place where him and basically all the band lived . . . in Juno (Uno) beach Florida. This joint was huge., Like a Mansion!. I got so stoned with him I cant recall how long I stayed with him. But anyway . . . the place was Al Capones old stompin grounds. And it was specially equipt with a Helicopter landing on top and likewise came with some more mafia tricks of the trade off the river it sat on. An underground boat entrance . . .

  And of-course I wound up goin to bed with him!

  Typical!

  I couldn’t help it sis!. The opportunity was there! and this was so Unique! Especially with a hot band as they were – then! Couldn’t pass it up. So I did . . . and god was he – Small ! So tiny I couldn’t find it!.

  That bad a!?

  Unfortunately. . . . yes!.

  Chhhhhhhhccchhhhccchhhh. It was sōōōōōōō. Sad . . .

  Say the other clip out of National Geographic! I’ve got a funny feeling this might be some left behind work of Lucifers and the angels that lived upon this planet before the fall and then were flooded out . . . I’m betting it was a . . . Navigational Landing strip for space Vehicles. And what I’m also thinking on (this) unknown creation (is) that the space vehicles were probably really huge like on the flick “Independence Day.” and the arrows helped spot the crafts landing as (a) whole of itself.

  Awesome!? A. Could be! And again – that’s why archeology intrigues me so much . . .

  “Happy 4th of July!”

  Aileen,

  7-7-99

  Dear Dawn,

  . . . A Dawn. Sattels is spelt., Saddels. Chhhcccchhhh. you crack me up. Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. Funny Boy!. . . .

  Boy . . . do I need to get in touch with the media. This prison is too corrupt. Man. So I was thinkin. Remember that gal that wanted to interview me you were talkin to awhile back . . . Ill let her if she’s still interested. But only about “Life on Death Row” . . . And if you can get in touch with, Court T.V . . . But – remember they’ve got to know it will only be about this prison. How I’m being treated on the row. Also CNN . . .