The Pirates of the Apocalypse

by J. B. Craig

  Pete Sputtered, “We’re not married, sir, Um, Greg!”

  “I know buddy, but I heard how you saved her at extreme cost to you. I also see how she looks at you. Now look, I’m her Dad, so you need to figure out a way to not offend me. I don’t want any Hanky-Panky going on through the walls that I have to pretend not to hear. That would put you on my bad side. And while I hear you’re good, I’m better. Don’t make me kill you.” Greg looked Pete dead in the eyes, as the blood drained from Pete’s face once more. Greg waited about ten seconds, and said, “Relax, I’m fucking with you, Kid. That said, heed my warning. If anything’s going on, I do NOT want to know about it. You dig?”

  “Dug, Sir… er, sorry… Greg. I was a little worried that you’d have a problem with, um”… at this, Pete pointed his finger at himself, going up and down his own body.

  “What, you think I have a prejudice against skinny people?” Greg smiled at Pete, and Pete laughed out loud.

  “Well, I’m glad you’re good with us skinny folks, Greg!” Greg slapped his back.

  “Look, you’re a Sheepdog, or you’re a Wolf. We come in all colors, religions, and attitudes. I only care that you’re a good guy. All that other shit never blinded me, and I won’t be blinded by it now. When I was in the Army, we said we all were the same color… Green. This is no different. I’m going to measure you by what’s in your heart. You feel free to do the same with me. If you ever feel like I need to be knocked down a notch, then call me out. Deal?”

  “Deal.” The two men shared a fierce handshake, and then sat down on the porch overlooking the sailboat.

  “Good. Now, you’re going to get messed with by the guys on night shift, especially Ski, our badass Ranger who got really hurt in the last attack and is still grumpy about it. He’s likely to take it out on the Cherry - thats you. They may have given you a free pass last night at orientation, but be ready to suck it up, Buttercup. We’ve been through battles together, and lost people. Be careful about what flippant shit you might say, because you may say the wrong flipping shit and really get beat down. These guys have shed blood with me, and we would die for each other. That said, you saved my baby, so I’d die for you, too. Just don’t make me die going ‘Fucking Pete’… Some of those guys are way badder-ass than I am, but I’ll go down swinging for you, okay?”

  “Since it’s early, Pete, I wanted to show you around the basement and other tricks and traps that I’ve built. Maria probably told you I’m a combat engineer, and into booby traps and such. I have set up our house as a last-stand Alamo if necessary, and I don’t need you blowing yourself up going, ‘Um, I wonder what this rope does.’”

  Greg smiled, and stood up. He showed Pete around the house, basement, garage and around the property line. He pointed out all his personal ‘home protection equipment’. Everyone from Annie to his neighbors, Este and Leilani, as well as the lead NCO’s of the Rock Harbor Army knew of these, and he assigned Pete to make sure that Bannon, Kelly and Maria were in the loop by the next shift change. By the time they got back to the living room, it appeared that Bannon and Kelly were already crashed out in the bunk room, given the snoring coming from behind the closed door. As they had to shift from night-to-day shift, and were given several hours off to sleep, so they could acclimate to the shift change. They were expected to report for a half-shift at Noon, then go on the normal Breakfast-to-Dinner day shift the next day.

  “Pete, before you rack out, if you have some time, I’d like to talk to you a bit more.”

  “Okay, Greg. It’s only about 8am… I only need a few hours of sleep these days.”

  “Well, Gunny and Ski will tell you you’re issued 5, and you should take six when you can. That said, I need you to be straight up with me. Maria said she killed. How many, and how bad was it?”

  “Well, Sir, she blew up a vehicle full of bad guys – Well, technically they blew it up themselves, but that was after she shot the driver and it crashed. Most of them burned, and she did, too. She has a heart-shaped scar on her back from that adventure. She got better, and seems okay most of the time, but in my unprofessional opinion, she’s got PTSD about it. She had to watch a pregnant woman burn to death due to her actions. She really seems to mourn losing a boat more than getting hurt, or shooting most attackers, but that pregnant woman really eats at her soul. She killed a bunch of guys at the University across the river, too, but they were cannibals, and she didn’t seem bothered by that.

  “When she has a boat, she’s the Captain, and we follow her. When we’re on land, Bannon seems to take charge. He’s the one you may need to worry more about, Greg. I’m not an expert Shrink, but he seems to take the killing harder than Maria does. He doesn’t show it often, but, you know?”

  “Yeah, Bannon has the biggest heart in this family. He was always taking in strays, defending kids getting bullied, and otherwise being the family Superman. I know this is hard for him, but Kelly seems to help.”

  Just then they looked up and saw Kelly walking quietly down the hallway from the bunk room. “Yes, sir. And I don’t mean that as a sir thing, just like ‘Yessiree Bob!’, for emphasis. That boy is in love. He follows HER around like a puppy, and she is happy to hold the leash, but she’s pretty cool, too.”

  Kelly came onto the sun porch from the hallway, making the sliding screen door squeal a bit as she opened and closed it “Yes, I am, Peter, and don’t you forget it. Bannon is all tucked in for the night shift, and I just wanted to come out and kiss this handsome man!” She grabbed Greg by his shoulders, leaned down to him, and kissed the top of his forehead. “Thank you, Mr. Creighton for letting us stay here. I love this community, and it’s good to see Maria and Bannon so happy. I’m going to wander around and talk to all these great folks. I need to see about a good fighting position, and get my rifle checked. I assume that you want me on day shift so that I can keep Bannon out of trouble?” She winked at Greg.

  “Young lady, you are going to be a handful. Please don’t break any hearts while out there. Yes, go to the clinic, find Doc and Kim. They should be a fun place to start. After that, they’ll probably send you to Manuel or Gunny, but be sure to get some sleep if you need to so that you are ready by Noon to start the half-day-shift rested. Make sure Maria knows to finish the day shift helping with dinner.”

  Pete and Kelly looked at each other. Greg said “What, Spill it!”

  Kelly started, “Well sir, you’re not going to keep ‘the Captain’ in the kitchen. She’s a fighter, sir. She won’t…”

  “I know, guys! I’ve seen the look in her eyes. I just want her to enjoy a day of normality, and to exchange any info that her Mom may have given her around food preparation. We may have her join the navy, but we’ve been told that you’re not to be on a boat if at all possible.”

  “One boat! Sink one lousy boat, and you’re labeled a poor sailor for all time! Sheesh!”, but Pete was smiling as he complained. Pete offered to show Kelly all of the traps that were set, they walked off while Greg contemplated the change in the family dynamic. As they walked away, Jennifer came out of the bedroom. Leilani had arranged for breakfast in bed, since she was now recovering nicely from her infection.

  “Did I hear that saucy little redhead kiss you, Darling? I’m the only redhead that gets to kiss you.”

  Greg heard that tone of voice, and the ‘Darling’ was a special touch. “Um, honey, it was just...”

  “Shut up, you fool, I’m just jerking your chain. Besides, we have the red-headed sister’s pact, she doesn’t mess with my man, I don’t kill her.” Jennifer guffawed, and sat in Greg’s lap. She grabbed Greg by the face and looked into his eyes. “Now, do you want to tell me about going fishing with just rocks and a pistol?”

  Greg kissed her, deeply, and didn’t even mind the morning breath. “I thought I lost you, baby. I didn’t want to watch you die. Thank God for small miracles and good timing. I’m glad you’re getting better.”

  “I’m too in love to die, you idiot. You better be, too. We do NOT give up
on each other, ever again. Deal?” She had tears in her eyes and was looking at him for an answer.

  “I’m sorry, baby. Yes. Deal. With you, Maria, and that hot OTHER redhead in my life, why would I do anything stupid like that?” He leered down the stairs where Kelly had followed Pete… and got a smack on the side of his head.

  “Your hot little redhead is sitting right here.” She shook her head, and her hair spun around it like a halo. Then she looked at him with her sauciest look and moved her hand down her belly. “Oh, I think your other red head is down here. She touched herself and moaned mockingly. “Coming to bed yet?”

  “Um… I think the answer to that is always “Hell Yes!” Since Annie was at school after breakfast, Greg stood up, carrying Jennifer into the bedroom for a few hours of very light exercise before sleeping. He had to be particularly careful of her wound, so he had to do most of the work… not that he was complaining. It had been a while, so they made the most of the time off.

  39. Pete – First Night Shift

  Maria woke Pete up with a kiss. “Hey sweetheart, Dinner in ten minutes. I’ve been sent back here to get you guys, because the ladies said half-day shift change personnel should sleep as long as possible, to be fresh for their shift. I suspect that Leilani wanted me to come ‘kiss my man’, as she’s been pumping me for info all day about you. I know that we’ve only been here a day or 2, but she seems to have adopted me in the traditional Hawaiian ‘Auntie’ style.”

  Pete and Maria made sure that Greg & Jennifer were all awake. Annie was dropped off by their neighbor, Nellie, another Army Veteran, who had a 12 Ga. Shotgun across her back. Pete commented about “Never seeing a better armed Nanny – A hotty Sister with a shotty”, and Nellie stuck her tongue out at him, making Annie Laugh. Introductions were made all around, and Maria hit it off with Nellie, with both of them mocking out Pete, who took it like a champ.

  Pete tried to get a little dignity back, by asking “How long it take you to stand back up and cock the shotgun after each shot, girl?” as Nellie weighed about 120 lbs soaking wet.

  Nellie flipped the 12 GA Mossberg off her shoulder and racked it in about 1.5 seconds, pointing it out the window in a safe direction. “It’s all about physics, little brother. You lean into it, and it don’t hurt till they’re all dead.”

  Greg chimed in with, “Pete, you’re out of your league. Nellie has killed more than her share of bad guys. The thing is, at any distance, the 12 Ga. doesn’t always finish the job, but her knife does. Stay on her good side, or she’ll kick my ass as I try to protect you.”

  Nellie emptied the chamber, re-loaded the shell in the tube, slung her shotgun, and high-fived Greg, all in about three seconds. “Damn straight, Jefe!” She kissed him on the cheek, and said “Let’s go get some chow, people, before Este eats it all!” The group, minus Pete and Greg walked down the road to the community center together, poking jabs at each other and otherwise having a great time as a big extended family. Greg stayed behind to make sure Jen was ready to go and Pete said he’d like to check her wounds, per Doc’s orders. She hadn’t made an appearance yet, so Pete shooed Greg back to the bedroom to wake her up. Pete wanted to to check out her wound before she got up and around.

  Greg opened the bedroom door and Jennifer woke up with a smile, pulling the sheet up her nakedness, but slowly, deliberately giving Greg an eyeful. She declared that she would walk to the center for dinner, despite doctor’s orders. Once she was decent, Greg called Pete in, and the EMT checked her dressing seeing no nastiness apparent. He made sure she took her antibiotics after he replaced her dressing, noting “nice stitches” under his breath. He said she could walk on her own, but no running or any ‘combat moves’ for a few more weeks. He would synch up his diagnosis with Doc at their shift change meeting, in case he didn’t have all the facts of the case, but it looked like the infection was losing. Typically, the incoming shift would eat before starting, and then they would walk to their station, where they would get briefed by the outgoing shift of anything that happened worthy of note. Then, the outgoing shift would head to the mess hall to eat, some would help clean up when asked by one of the Ethyl’s crew, and then head to off-duty time. Some liked hanging out for a few hours, then sleeping. Others preferred to sleep right after shift, and woke up whenever, spending those “whenever” hours at their other chores or leisure tasks. After months of the apocalypse, 5-6 hours of sleep was the norm, and plenty, as it was an exhausted, dream-filled REM slumber.

  Pete liked the system and was looking forward to getting to know some of his fellow ‘sheepdogs’, as they called themselves. He was accustomed to the ‘Dragon’ tag but could get used to this. Although everyone knew a dragon could kick the hell of any dog! Pete smiled to himself at that thought and headed to breakfast with the Greg and Jennifer.

  Maria had asked to be let go early, because she wanted to spend some time with Pete, her Dad, and the redheads before going off shift. The day was quiet, with only one group of folks offering to trade. They had been traveling the fields, gleaning what wheat they could, and wanted to trade their wheat for some meat. A deal was reached, with two rabbits for their small bags of wheat, and they were asked to move along, which they did, peacefully. They brought news of relatively safe roads, for those armed enough. They had seen clear roads to the South towards Bowling Green, but hadn’t been as far as Richmond recently. Maria reported that they both looked shaken at mention of Richmond.

  Maria introduced Pete to some of the guys coming off shift. Because Pete was the Medic, he was supposed to be based out of the community center, which was also their clinic, but rove around as necessary. Manuel and Gunny came off-shift together, holding hands, and clearly in love. Esteban and Leilani sat together for an off-shift meal, and Angel came on duty, briefing quickly with Gunny and Ski as the senior NCO’s had their normal pre/post-shift briefing. Greg stood close enough to listen in, and give words of encouragement, along with a fist-pound to Gunny.

  Greg looked at Angel, and said, “Angel, this young man is a good medic, but he needs to learn our lines, allies, signals and our fallback positions. Can you take him on a tour this evening? I hear he can shoot okay, as long as it’s the broad side of a barn that he’s trying to hit.” Greg elbowed Angel, then winked ant Pete and said, “No offense, Rookie! I’m going to go check on the firefighters in the Mortar Pit, and some of our other positions. Take good care of the kid. He means a lot to me already.” Greg smiled at Pete and trotted off towards the Mortars.

  Angel put an arm on Pete’s shoulder. “Amigo, Jefe over there would not be running anywhere if he was as big as he was the day I met him – when the lights went out, no?”

  “Si.” Pete said. “You mean he was a really big guy?”

  “Yeah, maybe three bills, Esse? Now look at him. He’s lean and mean, and I’ve seen him fight. But mostly, he’s the best at planning and strategy. His plans saved us at least twice. He’s a sick fucking genius, but with a good heart. You don’t hurt him or his baby, and I don’t kill you, Ok, Amigo?”

  Pete was smiling when he turned to look at Angel, and then stopped. While there was a smile on Angel’s face, his eyes were saying, “Don’t test me, boy.” Pete made a note-to-self, making sure that he only did good things for Angel, because he didn’t want to be on his bad-side. Up until then, Pete was pretty sure that Gunny was the baddest warrior in the community, and he was totally intimidated by her. He figured that’s what NCO’s needed, a lot of respect, a little fear, and vague orders so that the officers don’t mess it up too bad. Pete smiled back at Angel. “Never, Amigo. I wouldn’t hurt Maria’s family… or friends!”, he added quickly.

  “Okay, Pedro. Let’s go check out our forward observation posts, or FOP’s as Greg calls them. We have one in a barn down the road, and one in a blown-up Truck. That, plus Greg usually settles in on his roof most nights, watching the water. Our older citizens usually watch the water from their homes, since we’re surrounded by Agua. We have four walkies for squad talk, and a
few police radios for medium range transmission. Right now, with your HAM, we have long range, so Gracias. We only had a HAM receiver, and not enough energy to check it much. Let me show you around. Now, here we have all mines on this path. You step where I step and watch for these quartz stones. They’re the key.” Pete noted that the mines were always about a foot towards the middle of the path from the white stones, which wouldn’t be noticeable unless pointed out. They just looked like random stones. For those that were in the middle of the path, the mine was always about one foot out from the marker.

  Pete followed, and watched. It was a complex path down the trail, but he made it, and Angel didn’t swear, so he figured he did okay. They walked right to a destroyed but patched-up looking Army Truck. He met Doc’s wife, Kim, and A guy named Luis. They were playing scrabble on the roof of the truck, keeping watch. One look at the scrabble board, and Pete saw that half of the words were in Spanish, and the N with the Tilde over it was written in Sharpie, and on the flip side of the regular N.

  “How do you challenge each other’s words, if they’re in different language?” Pete asked.