Happy Ever After

by Kitty Wilson

  ‘I don’t think I can get them to empty the gutters or cut that overhanging tree down.’

  ‘No, maybe not.’

  ‘Although I did see an article online the other day about a barber in America offering “old man” haircuts as a cruel and unusual punishment for children.’

  ‘Shear my babies’ beautiful locks?’ Marion gasped in mock outrage.

  ‘Two Friar Tucks, that’ll teach them.’

  She burst out laughing at the image. ‘I wish I could say yes, but no.’

  ‘We could always make them decide the punishments for each other.’

  ‘That’s not a bad idea; no one knows you better than your siblings.’

  ‘Right? And I reckon we could trust them to be fair.’

  ‘But we’d have to make sure they were punitive, not eat twenty jelly babies at once sort of nonsense.’

  ‘They’ll definitely try something like that. Eat nothing but profiteroles until you’re sick.’

  ‘Ah, but Team Marksharp Senior is still a match for Team Junior.’

  ‘We are. Always. Forever.’ And the two exchanged a look so loud the whole hall could hear it.

  Chapter Thirty-one

  Several weeks had passed since the night of the May Fayre, when Richard and Marion had successfully presented a united front against their two younger sons, and there had been a marked difference in how Marion had been treating Richard since.

  Today was a perfect example. She had come home earlier than usual after spending the day shopping with Rosy and had started to cook, absentmindedly preparing enough for all five of them whilst he sat and chatted with her. She wordlessly slid his plate in front of him a little while later and neither of them ever addressed it but both knew, he was sure they did, that something had shifted, that their friendship seemed to be back.

  The change between them made Richard so happy that he had been practically skipping everywhere over the last few weeks. He wanted everything back, but this was a jolly good step and the real first positive one he’d had. It had opened up his hope, sprinkled it with a little life and it was beginning to grow again.

  Once dinner had been finished, he and the boys headed to the church hall for choir practice. Community choir had started as one of the boys’ punishments. Richard had been adamant that they needed a greater understanding of how the world worked, the dynamics of working together and the pride in creating something as a group. Which is why the rest of their punishments were also based around the village, like community service but for primary school children and lasting until the summer holidays.

  Alice had found them chores to do around the church and they were helping out at Memory Club, working with Bill Meacher weeding and maintaining the church grounds and aiding Pippa on the village’s Feast Week committee. With that and their homework they hadn’t had time to breathe, let alone get up to further mischief.

  To compound the seriousness of it all, their tech had been confiscated until they got positive reports for each task they undertook, their PlayStation only returned after a month of good behaviour.

  But to be fair to them, they had done all of this without too much fuss and actually enjoyed bits of it. So much so that Rafe had started to join them at choir.

  With his three boys at his side, Richard entered the church hall and found everyone gathered and halfway through ‘Amazing Grace’. Alice hadn’t wanted to use the school hall as they practised for Rosy’s wedding because she was having enough trouble keeping it secret from her boss as it was.

  It had taken the choir weeks, no exaggeration, to choose the songs for the wedding. At one point things were getting so desperate Alice made them sing fifteen of the most popular hymns for weddings to try and see which ones sounded best.

  The answer was none of them.

  The choir had only formed at Christmas last year and carols were easy to master – everyone knew them and had been singing them since childhood – but with other hymns, even the well-known ones, the choir was a lot weaker. When they had run through ‘Morning Has Broken’, Richard privately thought it sounded like the blackbirds were being baked into a pie rather than signalling the break of dawn. But listening to them now, a few weeks on, he felt a swell of pride; he wasn’t sure how Alice had whipped them all into shape but somehow she had managed it.

  He slid into the back of the group, handing each of the boys a song sheet complete with the words.

  ‘Oh aye, look out.’ Ethel paused her singing and greeted him and his family as they came and joined in. So much for Christian charity. Grace clearly wasn’t saving Ethel today.

  Annie, dressed head-to-toe in clashing scarlet and emerald, dug her in the ribs with her elbow. ‘Now, now Ethel. Don’t be a crosspatch; that’s not like you. They’ve been good as gold for weeks and it’s lovely to see the young getting involved.’

  ‘The only thing those boys should be involved in is borstal.’

  ‘They don’t have borstal these days; you are more generous-minded than that.’

  ‘Amazing grace, how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me…’ Everyone else was still singing the repeat verse but Richard couldn’t help but listen to the conversation next to him.

  ‘Not to them that don’t deserve it. Don’t be fooled by them singing all nice when we’re all watching. I won’t forget that kerfuffle up at the school in a hurry. I mean, I don’t mind a bit of mischief, but that’s something beyond that. Nickanan Night when we were kids never caused that much trouble.’

  ‘Knockdown Ginger was never that much fun either. Give me scrumping any time of day; much more thrilling and a reward at the end as well, yum.’ The two women cackled, all pretence at singing abandoned. ‘I think it was romantic – they were only trying to get their mum and dad back together, everyone knows that. You can’t blame them,’ Annie continued.

  ‘I bloody well can.’

  ‘You’re just cross cos we were out late last night.’

  ‘Out? What nonsense are you talking?’ Ethel, wearing her usual lace blouse and sensible skirt, looked at her more colourful friend and smirked. ‘You’ll be claiming next I was up half the night with a glow stick at that Rave in a Cave thing on the beach.’ Then she winked. Richard had often thought there was more to Ethel than met the eye, and this conversation was proving it.

  ‘Ha, I bet your ears are still ringing. I told you to wear those defenders and not to stand right next to the speakers. Honestly!’

  ‘We were only there an hour.’

  ‘An hour were long enough. I told you I didn’t like that nonsense – boom, boom, boom. Had to listen to enough of it when I was living in Plymouth.’

  ‘And I told you being old is about experiencing as many new things as you can before you die.’

  ‘Some things I’m quite happy to never experience. I’d rather hoped the joy had more to do with regular cups of tea and a hot water bottle.’

  Richard breathed a sigh of relief that they had changed subject.

  With ‘Amazing Grace’ over, people were now talking amongst themselves, cramming a quick few minutes of gossip in before Alice got them practising the next song. He watched as Rafe dragged his brothers over to Ethel. Where was this going?

  ‘Hello, I’m Rafe Marksharp, we’ve met lots before and I’ve been coming to choir for a few weeks now.’ Rafe addressed Ethel.

  ‘Yes. First time we met, I told you I’d chop your hands off with a rusty machete if you bothered Ethel’s friend, Reg, again, but you’ve been alright ever since,’ Annie remarked.

  ‘You don’t forget a threat like that in a hurry. My mum was furious with me, and I’m sure Reg will have mentioned that I haven’t been back to Whispering Pines since. I miss it. Anyway, I know you also know my brothers.’ He dragged his two siblings forward. Richard watched warily.

  ‘Yes, Although I’d be quite happy to live out my days without seeing them again, dastardly little sods.’

  ‘I know, I just wanted to explain that they have been very distressed
by my parents’ separation and were simply trying to reconcile the two of them. They’re young and didn’t think through the consequences of their actions but they have apologized to everyone and have been working really hard to make it right. They’re happy to offer further apologies to you if you like, aren’t you, Rupert and Rufus?’

  Rufus looked fairly willing; he was getting good at apologies. Rupert slightly less so.

  Richard decided now was the time to intervene, although he was also fascinated to see how this would end.

  ‘Ooh, Richard, brilliant. So pleased to see you.’ Serena popped up by his side, distracting him from the boys.

  ‘Hi, Serena, good to see you.’

  ‘You too. I’m glad you’re here, I was hoping that you’d turn up this evening.’

  ‘Oh, okay. Yep, me and the boys. Marion says hello to everyone; she’s been so busy. She, Rosy and Lynne have spent the day dress shopping and now she’s trying to organize the wedding entertainment. Matt keeps going on about getting a band called Blood of your Scrotum for one song and Marion is not convinced.’

  ‘Oh dear! Well, I was hoping you’d be here and perhaps she wouldn’t. That sounds weird but this is a bit delicate.’

  ‘Oh?’ Richard didn’t like the sound of that. Serena tipped her head over to a quiet corner and reluctantly he followed. Half of him was itching to jump into the Ethel and Rafe interaction – he reckoned Ethel would only be happy once all three boys had been keelhauled and Rafe would only settle once Ethel was brainwashed into being a fully paid-up member of the Rafe-Marksharp-is-a-marvel fan club. At this point, he wasn’t sure who was coming out the winner. The other half of him was fairly sure he didn’t want the boys hearing whatever it was Serena had to say.

  She slid out a folded piece of paper and passed it over to him surreptitiously. It felt like a drug deal. Just more church hall-y. Rather than put it straight into his pocket, he opened it up and saw it was a printout of a WhatsApp conversation. A conversation between Serena and Claudia.

  ‘What is this?’ It was a stupid question. He could see the answer. He just wanted a minute to process. And another minute to decide if he really wanted to read this. It felt wrong, as if he were eavesdropping, snooping or peering through people’s curtains late at night. But yet the conversation was Serena’s and she was handing it over to him, right now. Express permission given.

  ‘I was chatting to Claudia the other day; I do so periodically. Although, to be more accurate, Claudia reaches out when she wants an audience and ignores everything else.’

  ‘I don’t know if I need to be reading Claudia’s messages. Out of all the people in the word I should avoid right now, Claudia is probably at the top of the list. Why are you giving me this, Serena?’

  ‘Like I said a couple of months ago, this is eating me up. She got in touch to talk about her new-found love. So, I thought I’d use the opportunity to push a bit, see if I could find that evidence you referred to recently. Take a look when you have a minute. You might find it useful.’

  ‘Okay, thanks, I guess.’

  ‘Do you think you’ll use it?’

  ‘I think I need to read it first but truth is, as grateful as I am – and there may come a time when I need it – things are going quite well at the moment. I’m hoping that we might be taking slow steps back to a healthy place, but I never did the things I’m accused of and I would like it if Marion got there by herself and realized that I am the man she thought I was.’

  ‘I don’t blame you, that would be the perfect solution, but the fact is, Richard, and you know this better than me, your wife is a pretty stubb— determined woman and you may need a little help. Just a little push. Maybe once she has proof that she was mistaken then she’ll find it easier to walk back. Just saying.’

  ‘A good point. But it feels a bit like an aha! moment, an ambush. You know, as if I were to jump out of a bush waving a piece of paper triumphantly whilst dressed like Robin Hood.’ Serena looked at him oddly. Marion would have known what he meant. He tried again. ‘If I give her this, it feels like I’m saying in a slightly aggressive way, “You were wrong and now you need to eat yourself up with guilt.” Truth is we maybe needed something to shake us up. I have never seen Marion happier than she is running this business and I’ve certainly never been happier getting to spend my time down here, back with my boys. Even though I’m having to sleep umpteen miles up the road at my mate’s house, I feel closer to the boys, more connected to family life, than I have done in ages. So maybe it has done us good. And I want to see how things naturally progress from here, see if we get where we need to be without throwing even more confusion Marion’s way. But, having said that, I am really grateful that you’ve done this and it may well come in handy if my trust-in-destiny plans don’t work out the way I envisage. I hope you feel fully off the hook now.’

  ‘Not quite fully, but yes, it has made me feel a bit lighter. These messages aren’t quite a full confession but they do make it clear that she hadn’t had sex for quite some time before meeting Xavier, and that she has no idea why she was obsessing over unrequited crushes as she was.’

  ‘I’ll have a proper look when the kids aren’t around. But thank you, I do appreciate it.’

  At that moment, Alice clapped her hands to get the group’s attention. ‘Okay everybody, let’s get back together. You managed to make that sound brilliant. Which is just as well as we don’t have a lot of time left. Let’s see, or hear even, if you can sprinkle some of your magic over “This Little Light of Mine” as well.’

  There was a general shuffling as people got themselves back into one central body, Richard’s walk back punctuated by Rufus running into his father’s legs.

  ‘Dad. Dad. Ethel says she’s going to take me out sailing and show me what real life is like, I think that’s what she said. Can I go, can I?’

  Richard looked at Ethel’s face; it was not flushed with compassion and a willingness to educate his young son. There was however a distinct look of mischief. He had a funny feeling Ethel may well have more in common with his boys than he had thought and he wasn’t convinced that sending them off to sea with her was the most sensible idea.

  Chapter Thirty-two

  Serena: Thought I’d check in and see how Love’s Young Dream is going?

  Claudia: Ah, you came up in convo the other day. Perfect is the answer, perfect. He’s so fabulous, not quite as tall as I would have wanted, but very rich. I can’t always understand everything he says but I’m finding that it doesn’t matter too much. We have the language of love in common. And he is besotted with me, besotted. You have to meet him.

  Serena: I’d love to. Did you say he worked in finance too?

  Claudia: Yes, but in the States, not in London. It’s so nice to find a man who’s a man. A real man, an alpha, not afraid to be in charge. He was magnificent the other night, simply doesn’t tolerate poor service. I don’t know why I’ve wasted so much time on mooching about over wimpy-ass betas. Complete waste of time. Anyway, you must come up and meet him. I was thinking this weekend, he’s over so I’ve booked us a table for Saturday at eight. So excited for you two to meet.

  Serena: I can’t make it this weekend, so sorry. Am really happy you’ve found someone. Another time?

  Claudia: You’re always so flaky. Your best friend is IN LOVE after not having sex for ages! Years! Seriously, no sex since that airline pilot when we went on our girls’ weekend away three years ago. And now I’m in love, I can barely walk which is definitely a win, and I want you to meet him. Just come. You’re not still sulking are you?

  Serena: Sulking? NO. About what?

  Claudia: About that stupid letter thing. You should never have agreed to do it if you were going to make such a thing about it. Although I am a bit embarrassed about the fuss I made over that man. Especially seeing as he was too much of a coward to admit how he felt about me or do anything interesting. All that stupid ‘I love my wife’ shit. I’m not convinced he actually likes women at all. Xavi
er is a real man. In all ways!

  Serena: I can’t do this weekend. Maybe in the summer holidays if Xavier is around then?

  Claudia: FFS! Must go. Will you stop being such a crap best friend and get your arse up here please! Table is booked.

  Richard sat up in bed, his laptop playing documentaries in the background but paying zero attention to them. Instead he sat reading and re-reading this piece of paper over and over again. It felt weird reading someone else’s messages but he could see that this, whilst not explicit, certainly implied his innocence. Or at least that Claudia clearly hadn’t had sex for quite some time, not that he was sympathetic.

  Should he show Marion? Should he use it as the proof she had asked for? It had literally landed in his lap as if it were meant to be used, but perhaps he should patch up his marriage differently, healing the rifts that must have already been there for his wife to consider that he had been playing away. Heal those rifts, create a stronger family base and prove the sort of man he was, not the man he wasn’t. That was going to be his plan.

  Chapter Thirty-three

  It was mid-July and the sun streamed through the curtains, waking Marion before her alarm. She stretched, her usual morning stretch from tips of fingers to tips of toes, then reached over for Richard. It was her birthday and the two of them always made a great big family affair out of it.

  Then she remembered: Richard was no longer there.

  This would be her first birthday since she was nineteen without waking up next to him. She closed her eyes and took herself back to birthdays past, not madly healthy but on her birthday she was allowed to indulge, surely?

  The past few months had been odd; things had very much changed in her life and she was wildly happy professionally. The business was taking off and she had been throwing herself into events all over the south west. She had bookings now from Devon, Exeter and a company in Bristol had even reached out recently.

  Personally, she was pretty damn content. She had a firm female friend now for the first time in her life. She had always been the weird kid in school and then once she went to university she expected to be exactly the same, but instead she was suddenly popular, albeit only amongst the boys. A fresh start with none of her baggage apparent, no one there to remember that she was the smelly kid with a mother that the other kids called a slapper. At Oxford, the aloofness she had developed as a wall throughout her childhood now read as confidence rather than avoidance. Men were drawn to her and she discovered the joy of a new-found status as queen bee. It was something she had clung to relentlessly ever since before she realized, which she was only now doing at this point of her life, that there was joy to be had in being part of a group, joy in having a give and take friendship rather than being the leader.