BoyScout (The Rebels MC)

by Avery Abbott

  He looked to Scout. “Have Kick go fetch it.” Scout pulled out his cell and typed a quick message off.

  “My place is locked.”

  He just gave me an it-don’t-matter look.

  “So,” he swallowed. “How is Dee?”

  “Gone. She passed away back in late February. Driver was high as a kite in the middle of the day.”

  “Shit! I’m so sorry, kid.”

  I looked down at my hands. “Yeah, me too,” I mumbled. And then for some odd reason, I offered, “She was a great mom. My best friend and I never wanted for anything, except a dad, when I was little. She never remarried. She went on a handful of dates, but she said they never measured up to you.”

  “You have me a disadvantage, Shaw, and I don’t like that feeling, and even more, I don’t like feeling confused. So, these sweet words are nice, but pointless since your mother was my world back then, so you need to forgive me when I say I don’t believe you.”

  “That I’m your daughter?”

  “No, I can see you are. Like looking in the mirror. It’s the words I don’t trust.”

  I shook my head. “It’s the truth. I know you don’t know me at all, and I’m sure I’m the last thing you would expect showing up after all these years, but I’m not a liar and I certainly am not going to let you sit there and call her one.”

  “You ever been in love, Shaw?” I saw Scout turn his head my way, waiting for my response. So, I shook my head even though I was in love with the jerk who betrayed me, but there was no way I’d tell him, or Scout, how I felt now.

  “How old are you?”

  “I’m nineteen, but I’ll be twenty in December. I was born on Christmas.”

  “So, Dee’s gone, and you came to find me for what? Money? Security? Love? What?”

  “This isn’t exactly how I planned on this going down.”

  “How did you expect it to go down?”

  “I don’t know. I just thought you wouldn’t be so cruel, I guess.”

  “Shaw?” His jaw clenched. “Shaw, you haven’t seen cruel yet. I’m just trying to figure out what the fuck she was thinking running with you, keeping you from me all these years, knowing I would’ve given you both the world.”

  “She was afraid of your lifestyle and me being dragged into it. You’ll see when you read the letter.”

  “My lifestyle?” he mumbled and then ran his hand through his hair. He spun in his chair, poured a drink, handed one off to Johnny and then filled one for himself.

  He turned to Scout. “How did you get involved?”

  “I told you. She’s the beach bunny you sent me to pick up a few months back.”

  “Is that why you put her at the restaurant?”

  “No, bro. I had no clue who she was. I just knew she wouldn’t be right for Leather and Lace when I met her. She was broken. Anyway, I got to know her and I picked up on the fact not many people have eyes that odd green shade. Then I thought I was crazy, so I let it go, but then little things she’d say or let slip, and I thought more on it. The guys of course were thinking with their dicks and didn’t even notice.”

  “Next question, brother. Why the fuck did you have your tongue down her throat earlier, knowing she was my daughter?”

  Interesting question, one I wanted to know the answer to, so I sat back, smug, and waited for him to answer, but he merely shrugged. I crossed my arms, grinning. “I’d like to hear that reason as well.”

  Both men’s gaze raked over me then ignored me. “You know that shit ends now, right?”

  “Yep,” Scout answered.

  “What? Why?” I asked to no one in particular. And even as I asked it, I wasn’t sure which question I want answered. Why did he kiss me or why couldn’t he kiss me anymore?

  Smokey answered, “Out of respect for me, Shaw.”

  “What if I want him to kiss me?”

  His eyes flicked to Scout then bounced back to me. “Not even then,” Scout mumbled.

  “Biker rules are stupid.”

  “As stupid as you running off Saturday with Chucky for twenty-five smack?” Scout asked me, eyes so angry it startled me.

  “Scout, she’s obviously not going anymore.”

  My eyes left Johnny’s and went to Smokey. “Excuse me?”

  “You ain’t going nowhere, kid.”

  “Look, Smokey, is it? I know this dad thing is new to you, but word of advice, don’t start making me hate you on day one.” I cleared my throat and sat up poker straight. “And, I’m going with Charles. He’s already made reservations and everything. His mother is dying and I’m pretending to be the fiancé before she goes. That’s it. If you,” I turned to Scout’s angry glare, “would’ve listened or asked me once you found out, I would have told you about the new agreement we had and maybe we wouldn’t be in this little pickle.”

  Smokey snickered, shook his head and then tossed keys from his desk to Scout. “Lock her the fuck up.”

  “What?” I screamed. “Lock me up? What are you talking about?”

  “Just twenty-four hours, kid,” he said, slammed his drink and then stuck his head out the door. Smokey bellowed for some guy named Hawk to come in. “Lock her in the safe room.”

  “No,” Scout stood. “That room is shit, give her mine for now.” He called the guy over and whispered something in his ear.

  Scout shuffled out quickly. “He’ll be right back for you. He’s just checking the room to see if it’s clean.” The three of us sat there in silence, tense, and frankly I was rattled with everything that just went down. I knew both men were ogling me as I panicked. I gulped and tried to calm myself down, but panic didn’t ease in—it hit me like freight train.

  “What’s wrong with you?” Smokey asked, concerned.

  I closed my eyes and counted my breaths while the he tried to play doctor and diagnose me. And then Scout came to me.

  He lifted my chin, his eyes searching mine. “You’re okay, Shaw. Sunshine, look at me. You’re okay. I’m right here.” I didn’t know why or how he did it but he always calmed me like my mother had. He tucked my hair behind my ears and said, “Breathe.”

  I nodded and listened. “I’m okay.”

  “Room’s ready.” This Hawk guy popped back in.

  “Yeah,” Scout answered, still gazing at me. He bent his forehead to mine. “I’m sorry.”

  “Let’s go.” Hawk grabbed my arm and whisked me out and up a set of stairs, forcing me in front of him. When I reached the top, I saw a long hallway with several doors on either side.

  I turned. “You’ve never seen me dance.” I ran my finger down his chest, and sucked on my lip, trying to look sexy.

  ‘Thank fuck for small wonders.”

  “I’ll dance, private one, if you let me go. Real private.”

  He smiled, lifted my hand and placed a kiss on my knuckles. I went to the room he told me to find a big old bed with an American flag hanging over the it, a poster of a girl naked on a motorcycle, a dresser and small washroom off to the side.

  I turned, grinning to find him outside the door. “If you need anything, holler.”

  And then the bastard locked me inside.

  I kicked the door as hard as I could, forgetting I was simply wearing one flip flop. “Shit!” I screamed, not caring anymore and grabbed my foot, hopping to the bed. It was then I saw the photo of Scout when he was younger, with a guy who looked just like him, slightly older in a uniform. “Why did you do this? Why did you betray my trust?” I screamed out loud, not caring who heard and pounded on the door. “Why did you betray me, Scout?” I cried out.

  It had been hours since they locked me inside his room. Nervous and tired of pacing, I had tried a shower, crying, all of it, but nothing worked. I looked around for a spot to calm me down. The carpet was gross, but realized under his side table it was clean, so I moved it to the front, blocking the door.

  I knelt, my hands hitting the carpet, then my head followed, my feet pushing me up into a headstand. My eyes caught some trash on
the floor underneath his bed, several used condoms next to empty bags of cheese doodles. Gagging, I looked away, closed my eyes and concentrated on settling my nerves.

  I was just to the point I enjoyed most. The point where my mind stripped all of my thoughts, and memories were forgotten, when a bang jostled me. The unlocking of the door had me coming back down to reality and moving swiftly enough when the door flung open, his side table sailing across the room.

  Smokey’s gaze assessed the situation. “What the hell are you doing?”

  “Yoga. It calms me.”

  “Slider said you’ve been on your head for almost thirty minutes.”

  “How does Slider know that? I haven’t seen him.” And then I realized they had been watching me the whole time. My eyes darted around looking for a camera but came up empty, and then realized maybe, just maybe, it was inside the light fixture.

  Oh. My. God.

  The whole time.

  Which meant they saw me in my undies and no bra. It meant they saw me break down and crying into Scout’s pillow about life’s turn of events. And I all could think about was how much I wanted my mother to hold me and tell me it was okay. That I would be fine now.

  He entered. Smokey lifted the table and placed it back where it belonged. His gaze landing and lingering on Scout’s obvious nightly romps. “Shaw?”

  I didn’t dare look as he closed the door, locking it.

  He sighed heavily. “Maybe some background will help.” He sat down on the bed. “I was twenty-six when I got back from Mogadishu in ‘93. I held my best friend in my arms as he died while we were under intense fire. We barely escaped ourselves. It was supposed to be a quick in and out. It wasn’t. We lost a lot of men. Good men.

  “I came home a different man. I was full of hate and rage. Shawn, who you know as Hawk, served with me. We started the club not giving a shit anymore about our lives, and then I met Dee. Jesus, I never saw someone who wore so many colors at once. She was stunning. The first time I saw her she had on this long, hippy like dress, every color of the rainbow represented. I was in such a dark place and everything about her was light and good. I never had believed in love at first sight, Shaw, until her. I admit to thinking she’d get in my bed, help keep the ghosts away for a few hours and then I’d split like I always did, but then she kissed me and talked about her dreams, and I found I wanted to hear more. She fell asleep in my arms that night. We didn’t even make love. She just talked and talked and I listened to every word like it was gospel. By morning, I knew I loved her and wanted to keep her.”

  He stopped. “Would you look at me?”

  I continued my silent treatment, but let my gaze travel to him. He looked to be in his late forties, early fifties. Dark hair like mine and a matching set of green eyes, shape and color. He was in jeans, a camo t-shirt that showed off his muscular shoulders, tattoos riddled down both arms and very handsome.

  “She moved in a week later and I had never been happier. When she left, I looked everywhere for her. I had people trying to track her for me, but we got nothing. After four months, and no other club claimed any kind of retaliation, I figured she left for a reason. Each day she was gone, I grew angrier and angrier with her for leaving me. My world had gone dark again.

  He sighed. “Jesus, if I had known about you, I wouldn’t have given up. I would have found you both eventually. Where were you?”

  “Everywhere. She moved us around. I have no clue where she hid while she was pregnant with me.”

  “Where did you end up?”

  “Phoenix.”

  His eyes closed. “So close.” He ran his hand down his very-well-kept beard, then pulled a chair to me, spun and sat down, resting his arms over the back of the seat. He stared. “I read the letter. Kick got all the stuff you had. I wish she would’ve come to me and told me her fears. I would’ve let her go to keep you two safe until I could come get you both, but she didn’t. And I missed out on loving her and you. And, I’m sorry my lifestyle took that away, but I get it. It hurts, but I do. I understand why she left now.”

  I swallowed.

  “Jesus, you’re beautiful, Shaw. You look a lot like her.”

  I looked down nervously, unsure of what to say. His large hand lifted my chin, forcing my eyes to meet his. “I know you hate him right now, but Scout did the right thing bringing you to me.”

  I yanked my head from his grip. He sighed again.

  “I need to know your version of what’s going on between you two.”

  “Nothing,” I snapped, refusing to look his way.

  “I know you don’t understand our life, but this is a big deal to us. He went behind his club’s back, not only hid you from me, but took advantage of you, knowing who you were.”

  “He never did either. I refuse to answer what Scout means to me, but I don’t want him to suffer because of being my friend. That’s not fair. He was good to me. He helped me when no one else would.”

  He stood. “Just so you know, that little friends-with-benefits thing you two had going on is now officially over.”

  He unlocked the door and left.

  I sat there in shock at first. Then, I broke down and hid in the bathroom so they wouldn’t see me crying.

  Chapter 28

  BOYSCOUT

  “I hate you so much right now,” Shaw spewed, but I saw the wetness from her fresh tears as I went to check on her. I’d been watching her on the camera Hawk put on my brother’s picture frame.

  “Look, Shaw, I’m fucking sorry, okay, but it had to be done.”

  “He’s mean,” she mumbled and swiped her tears away.

  I sat down and pulled her to me. “He’s not.” I let myself hold her hand because I needed to feel her, touch her, even though I was not supposed to. “I took him off guard and he’s pissed that I did, and he’s also probably grieving your mom, because I have never heard him talk like that about a woman, and if she was the love of his life, he just found out she died. He needs a minute or two to grasp all this, Babe. Give it to him.”

  Smoke and Hawk had torn out of here without telling us where they were going, so I slipped up here, needing to make sure she was good and apologize for the way it went down.

  She nodded, but dropped my hand and stood. “Can I make a call to Jody?”

  “No, Shaw, you can’t. One of the boys already took care of your work, and Charles. It’s not happening and if I know Smokey like I think I do, you won’t be going back to work there either.”

  “That’s why you did all this, isn’t it? You were jealous of Charlie and have been begging me to quit.”

  “I don’t get jealous, Shaw. I admit, I hate seeing you take your clothes off for men, I hate it even more that you were requested way more than I care to know to head into that fucking champagne room. I hate that guys touched you and fuck I hate the fact that you were ready to whore yourself out for money.”

  “You keep calling me that name and I swear to God, Johnny, I will really never forgive you.”

  “You can’t even say the word, Shaw, but, yet you were ready to sell your body. I don’t get that. It doesn’t make any fucking sense to me.”

  “Maybe it doesn’t have to make sense to you, just to me.”

  “Care to explain that logic?”

  She spun and the tears were gone, anger replacing them. “My mother always loved me and took care of me, Johnny and then bam I have no one. I met Charlie and he’s super nice to me, even likes me a lot. I’ve never not been taken care of, so I grabbed hold of the idea of making some easy money, and if he wants to shower me with gifts then oh well. And when you dropped off the face of the earth, I formed a new plan. I’m moving to Boston when I can and start over. I mean you, yourself told me a “we” couldn’t exist in your world, so the rest of what I do is not your business.”

  Her explanation gutted me, but I kept pushing. “And, I told you I’d take care of you, Shaw, regardless, and you wouldn’t have to sell yourself. And fuck, Boston. You’re not going anywhere.”r />
  “Don’t you get it?”

  I punched the wall. Not hard enough to cause damage, just needed a little pain somewhere else then my heart. “No, Babe, I don’t.”

  “What if he hates me?”

  I spun around surprised. “Smokey? He would never hate you, Shaw.”

  “But, you’re just like him.”

  “Wait, like Smoke, or fucking Chucky?”

  “No, Johnny, my dad, and he’s the reason she left him, even though she loved him. I can’t do the same. I’m not strong enough. One of us is going to be hurt before this is all over and it’s always me.”

  “What are you saying, Shaw?”

  “Charles is the easier bet, Johnny. I could take his money and then go. You and me, we’d be complicated, because if we fell in love and then…”

  I pulled her to me. And then what, Shaw?”

  “Nothing. It’s nothing.” She shoved me away. “I just want to be left alone.”

  Done with her head games, I figured, fuck it. “Yeah, you know what? Have it, Shaw.” I walked out and slammed the door, locking her in.

  Chapter 29

  SHAW

  The door unlocked just as I had slipped into my jeans and a really cute Cheap Trick T-shirt, and I did all out in the open knowing Scout was watching most likely. Fiona had dropped off a bag of my clothes, although they wouldn’t let me see her. If they wanted to film me, so be it. Slider walked in with a bag of McDonalds. I was starving and it smelled delicious, even though I tended not to eat fast food as much as possible since it did horrible things with my acne.

  “Here. Cheeseburger, fries and a Coke.” Slider placed it down on the table. My gaze looked down to it all, frowning. “What?”

  “I don’t drink Coke. Can I get a bottle of water?”

  “Yeah.” He turned to leave but I stopped him.

  “Can I call a friend?”

  “No can do, Lips. Club business, so only members can know what’s going on.”

  I perked up. “Well, can I talk to you?”

  He seemed uninterested, but stayed. “Sure. What’s wrong?”