I listened to him, watching his face. This man . . . this man who’d once upon a time, I’d thought I’d hated, who had been so patient with me and all of my hang-ups and foibles . . . and all he asked was the right to claim me in public. How could I say no?
“Okay.”
Eli’s head reared back. “Okay? Seriously?”
I giggled. “Yeah, okay. Seriously. I understand what you’re saying, and I’m all right with it.” I took a deep breath. “I mean, I don’t want to have a coming out party or anything. I don’t want to make an official announcement. But we’re not going to hide anymore either.” I skimmed my hand down lower to settle on a very interesting part of his anatomy. “Especially if it means I can get a little more of this on a regular basis.”
“My God. Was that all it took?” Eli dropped back to the pillow, pretending to be shocked. “I just needed to make you come three times and ask you real sweet?”
“No, you doofus.” I swatted at his arm. “It’s just that the time is right. You made some good points. I’m tired of hiding.” I hesitated. “Plus, and trust me that this had nothing to do with me agreeing, they already suspect.” I told him what I’d overheard upstairs.
“All right, then.” He tugged me closer and kissed my forehead. “No more hiding. From now on, I get to hold your hand and kiss you whenever I want.”
“Within reason,” I put in. “I don’t like being groped in public.”
“Got it.” His eyes lit up. “Hey, let’s go out to my living room now, order a pizza and snuggle in front of the TV to watch a movie. I have a shirt you can borrow.”
“Sure, but I have perfectly fine clothes right on the end of the bed.” I began to sit up.
“I know. But seeing you wear my shirt in sexy. And it makes me happy.” Eli cast me the puppy dog eyes.
“Eli, I am not going to sit out there where Nate could see me, with my ass hanging out of one of your T-shirts.” I crossed my arms. “I appreciate what you’re saying, but it’s not going to happen.”
“Okay, not a shirt then. How about my old jersey?” His gaze was steady on me. “I still have it. It’s kind of a fantasy of mine, to see my beautiful girlfriend wearing nothing but my jersey.”
How was I supposed to say no to that?
“Okay,” I relented. “But listen, bud. If I do this, I’m going to sleep in your bed tonight, and I expect two more orgasms. At the very least.”
Eli’s answering smile was huge and bright, but even so, he rolled his eyes. “So demanding. All right. If I must. It’s a sacrifice, but I guess my girlfriend is worth it.”
“She sure as hell is.” Turning, I bent over to lay a blistering kiss on his mouth. “And don’t you ever forget it.”
Chapter Thirteen
Senior Year
Zelda
“Okay, we’re all gathered.” I drew my legs up under me on the sofa, tucking my feet beneath my ass. “What the hell is this big news that you had to wait to tell us all at once?”
Quinn was in the worn armchair that she’d brought from her house last year, when we’d first moved into this apartment. Studying my friend, I frowned. It had been a rough year for her. Hell, it had been a rough year for Nate and even for Gia, too. It seemed that only Eli and I had had relatively smooth sailing during our senior year of college.
He caught my eye now and reached for my hand, the gesture automatic but still so sweet that it made my heart melt a little bit more every time he did it. It had been over a year since we’d gone public, and I couldn’t quite remember why we’d waited so long. All of the fuss and drama I’d expected from our friends hadn’t happened.
I smiled a little, recalling that first night. When Nate had come out and seen us on the sofa, my legs draped over Eli, Eli’s hand on my ass, he hadn’t even reacted. He’d simply nodded at us, asked if there was any pizza left, and sat down to finish watching The Avengers with us.
And when I’d texted Quinn and Gia a bit later to tell them not to expect me to come home that night, that I was sleeping over with Eli, their response had been similarly anti-climactic. Quinn had replied to me, Okay, have fun. See you tomorrow.
“Okay, well . . .” Quinn coughed a little and cast Nate a side-eye. “First of all, thanks for all of your help and support while Nate was in the hospital. Zelda, I don’t know what I would’ve done if you hadn’t been around to drive us to the emergency room that night.”
“I’m just glad you’re better.” I smiled at Nate. “You are, right?”
“For now, yeah.” Nate nodded. It didn’t take a medical degree to see that his condition had deteriorated in the past few months. His face was gaunt, and he just looked frail. There was a new expression in his eyes, too . . . something that frightened me, even though I didn’t know why.
“Well, let’s talk about the good news first.” Quinn’s cheerfulness was almost painful to see. It reminded me eerily of Lottie, my mother, when she’d been ramping up to a manic phase.
Gia barked out a laugh. “We could all use some good news. Spill it, Q.”
“Um.” Quinn took a deep breath and held out her left hand. “Nate and I are engaged.”
For a long, horrible moment, there was complete, shocked silence. Next to me, Eli held my hand a little tighter, as though he knew I was going to need comfort in the wake of this announcement. On my other side, Gia swore softly beneath her breath.
I swallowed hard. Someone had to say something. It looked like it was going to be me. “Wow. That’s a big surprise. Uh . . . congratulations.” I rose stiffly to my feet and crossed to Quinn’s chair, leaning down to give her a hug. And I hesitated only a second before doing the same for Nate before I went back to sit next to Eli.
“I know that you guys don’t necessarily see this as good news.” Nate had never been the type to hide from the truth or filter his thoughts. “You’re probably thinking Quinn is throwing her life away on me. But the second part of this announcement is that after this last hospital stay, my doctor let me know that we’re out of options when it comes to my disease. Now, it’s a matter of time. From here on out, they’re only going to focus on keeping me going long enough to graduate—and get married.” He shot Quinn a quick smile. “And then on keeping me comfortable until the end.” He paused. “Which should be in about six months or less. So you see, me asking Quinn to marry me isn’t a life sentence. It’s just . . . for the duration of my life.”
“Oh, Nate.” Gia pressed one hand to her mouth. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.”
Nate’s lips curved into a half-smile. “It’s okay, Gia. This isn’t a shock. We’ve always known I wasn’t going to make old bones, like my grandma used to say. But I don’t want to waste these last months by wishing for things that I’ll never have or pretending that the end isn’t coming. So I’m going to ask you guys for a couple of favors.”
Eli grunted. “Anything. Tell us what you need.”
Quinn laughed. “Watch out, Tuck. I said the same thing to Nate, and I ended up engaged.”
I glanced at Nate, wondering if Quinn’s words were hurtful, but he only chuckled, too. “I promise I’m not going to propose to Tuck.” He slumped back in his chair. “I’m going to ask you all not to tiptoe around me and act like everything’s going to be okay. Treat me the same way you always have. Also, I—Quinn and I, that is—we’d really like you all to be at our wedding. It’s going to be the weekend after graduation, down at the shore, at the Russells’ beach house.”
“Of course.” Gia nodded. “I’ll be there.”
“Good.” Nate hesitated. “If you want to bring Matt, I think—”
“There’s no need for Matt to be there,” Gia interrupted. “I’m not an idiot, Nate. I know he’s never been a friend to you.”
“Thanks. If you change your mind, though, let us know.” Nate turned to look at Eli. “Tuck, will you be my best man?”
“Hey, sure.” Tuck forced a grin. “Just don’t ask me to stand up for you.”
“Funny.”
Nate shook his head and reached for Quinn’s hand. “I’m going back downstairs to lie down for a while, if you’re okay with that.”
“Of course.” Quinn pasted on a happy face, and we were all silent and still until after Nate had left. Once the door closed behind him, it felt as though the only boundary holding us all back had been removed.
“Quinn.” I stood up and paced the small room. “Are you sure about this?”
She looked exhausted, I realized; dark shadows were painted under her eyes. “I am, yes. Zelda, I already know how you feel about the whole situation. But right now, I need you to be my friend and support what I’m doing. I’ve made up my mind. Just—both of you—” She glanced at Gia. “Please just be here for me.”
“Of course.” Gia jumped up and crawled into Quinn’s chair, wrapping her arms around our friend. “What else can we do for you?”
Quinn shrugged. “I’d like you to both be my witnesses at the wedding ceremony, if you don’t mind. And otherwise . . . just promise you won’t leave me.”
“Never.” Gia drew Quinn into a tight hug, her eyes meeting mine. “We promise.”
Watching your best friend destroy her life was not easy. And for me, who had always found it a challenge to keep my thoughts to myself, standing silently by while Quinn moved closer to marrying Nate was torture.
Complicating the situation was the fact that Eli was obviously conflicted about the entire deal. I understood; he and Nate had grown close over the past four years. While he agreed with me that this marriage was crazy, he also had some empathy for Nate’s feelings.
“Babe, I gotta to say, if I only had six months to live, I’d probably do the same thing. I’d want to marry you, because I’d never want to miss that experience.”
“Uh huh.” I nodded. “But what if you knew I was actually crazy in love with another man? What would you do then?”
“What other man?” Eli pretended to glower at me. “Tell me who he is so I can beat his ass.”
I rolled my eyes. “This is a hypothetical situation. Be serious.”
“Okay.” Eli’s grin faded. “Yeah, I get what you’re saying. You’re right. It’s fucked up seven ways to Sunday. But what can we do? They’ve made their decisions, both of them. We just have to be good friends to them, for as long as we can.”
I was still brooding about that conversation a few days later, as I sat on our sofa, my laptop propped on my knees, working on a research paper that was due on Monday. Gia wandered out of her bedroom, stopping in the kitchen to grab a bottle of water before she dropped into the recliner in the corner of our living room. She had on yoga pants and a worn, baggy T-shirt, not the usual Gia outfit.
“Hey, gorgeous.” I studied her, frowning. “I thought you were going out tonight. Isn’t it Saturday?”
“It is,” she sighed. “But I decided I didn’t feel like going out. I’ve got a shit ton of work to do. I’m behind on reading in two classes, and I have a paper due in four days that I really should get started on.”
“Hmm.” I nodded. “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. I’m doing the same.” I didn’t add what I was thinking, that it was about time Gia started paying attention to her classes. She’d been ignoring her homework and neglecting her studies for a while now. For the past couple of weeks, though, she’d been buckling down, scrambling to recover enough that she could graduate without any issue.
“How about you? Are you staying in tonight, too?” Gia dangled her leg over the arm of the chair, watching me.
“That’s the plan.” I twisted a little, stretching my back. “I’m going to make dinner for Quinn, Nate and Eli. You want to join us?”
Gia lifted one shoulder. “Maybe. I don’t know. I might just hunker down and get through this paper. We have chips and dip, I think. That’ll get me through. I’m not much in the mood for socializing.” She made a gagging face. “And honestly, I’m not sure I can deal with watching the Nate and Quinn show. Is it just me, or does she look a little sadder every day?”
“It’s not just you.” I sighed. “I hate this. And I’ve told her that I do. Everyone, including Nate, knows she’s still crazy in love with Leo. I’m really pissed at Nate for putting Quinn in the position of having to choose. It’s not fair to her.”
“Yeah,” Gia nodded. “I love Nate, and my heart is breaking for him, but if he had just asked Quinn to be with him until . . . the end, you know she would have. He didn’t have to propose. Now she’s going through the farce of a wedding, even though she knows it can’t ever be a real marriage.”
“And what if he doesn’t die?” I glanced over my shoulder, even though I knew Quinn was downstairs with Nate. “I asked Quinn that. I said, what’re you going to do if Nate has some kind of sudden, miraculous remission? Or what if they come up with a cure? Then she’s stuck with him unless he’s man enough to bow out—and we all know Nate wouldn’t do that. He’s always been hung up on Quinn, and I think if he knew he was going to live, he’d fight to hold onto her.”
“And if you could see Leo . . . God, Zelda. When I go down to Carolina to see Matt, Leo just seems defeated. He doesn’t talk about either of them, but it’s eating him up.”
“I have no sympathy for him.” I closed my laptop and rolled my shoulders. “Leo should’ve fixed things with Quinn long ago. They love each other. They’ve been waiting for the perfect time to be together—for Leo to graduate and get drafted, all of that—but now what? He has no one to blame but himself.”
“Yeah, but—” Gia scowled and picked up her buzzing phone. “Sorry, Matt’s texting.” She scanned the screen and groaned, her eyes closing. “Shit. He got the dates mixed up, and he thought I was coming down this weekend. Now he’s furious.”
My body tensed as it always did whenever Gia mentioned Matt. “What does he expect you to do? Drop everything and fly down there now?”
“Probably. But guess what? He’s out of luck. I’m not in the mood for his crap today. I’m turning off my phone and getting to work.”
“Good for you.” I held up my hand for her to smack as she walked past me. “If you want any supper, let me know. I’m making plenty.”
“Thanks.”
The next week was a crush of papers, exams and meetings with my advisor about my post-graduation options. I knew what I wanted to do: I wanted to work with farmers like my grandparents, helping them find new and better options for both growing and selling food. My advisor was pushing me toward a job with one of the big ag companies, but I didn’t think that was where I wanted to be.
Still, even as preoccupied as I was with all of that, I noticed that something was off with Gia. She’d ended up going out after all on Saturday, and she hadn’t dragged her ass home until after noon the next day. I wasn’t one to judge, certainly, and I wouldn’t have thought much of it, except that Gia was so quiet and withdrawn all week.
She flew down to Carolina that weekend, and since Quinn was spending a few days with her mother down at the shore, Eli and I had the apartment to ourselves.
“I’m not writing any papers or doing any school reading this weekend,” I announced as I flopped onto the sofa next to him. “I’m all yours. If you want me, that is.”
“Always want you, baby.” Eli hooked his arm around my neck and tugged me closer, kissing my cheek. “What do you want to do? Go out to eat? See a movie?”
“Stay in and fuck like bunnies?” I shot him a sunny smile. “Sleep as long as we want? Forget for just a few days how our friends are ruining their lives?”
Eli sighed. “Let’s not get started on that again. There’s not a damn thing we can do about it. I’m totally on board with the rest of your plans, though.” He touched my cheek. “Just being able to cuddle with you on the couch is basically paradise.”
“Agreed.” I laid down and rested my head on his lap, humming a little in satisfaction. “I could stay here all weekend.”
“This is what I love about us. We’re usually on the same page.” Eli stroked my hair, playing with th
e ends. “So what happened at the meeting with your advisor?”
“Ugh. Do we have to talk about that?” I buried my face in his thighs. “She wants me to meet with a couple of companies who expressed interest in me. She thinks since I’ll have my masters, too, I can probably start at a fairly decent salary right off the bat.”
“And that’s not . . . good news?”
“Well, yeah, it’s good. But I don’t think it’s what I want to do. I think I want something that’s going to help farmers, not potentially screw them over.” I heaved out a long breath. “I know I won’t make much money that way, but I’d be happier. I think.”
“Then that’s what you should do.” Eli sounded so sure, and I envied him that. Knowing what I wanted to do and making that choice were two different things.
“Have you heard from any of the schools?” Eli was graduating with his degree in elementary education, and he’d applied at several local school districts.
“I have an interview in Gatbury and another one in Eatonboro. Didn’t hear anything from Franklin, which is disappointing, since you’d think my alma mater would be interested in hiring one of their own.”
“It would be their loss.” I was quiet for a few minutes. Graduation was looming closer and closer, and although I was chomping at the bit to finally get out of school, I was more than a little worried about what was going to happen between Eli and me. We hadn’t discussed the future; he’d talked about moving into an apartment, telling me he definitely didn’t want to livr with his parents shsin. Beyond that . . . I didn’t know what to expect.
Oblivious to my inner turmoil, Eli reached for the television remote. “I’m in the mood for some Marvel. Want to watch the new season of Daredevil?”
“Sure.”
I was just beginning to relax, getting lost in the first episode, when Eli’s hand began stroking down my side in a gentle, tantalizing touch. A few minutes later, his fingers slipped under my T-shirt, moving closer and closer to my breast.
Next Man Up (Making the Score Football Romance Book 2) Page 22
