Welcome to Temptation

by Jennifer Crusie

  That night, Phin had just grabbed his car keys when Sophie knocked on the back door of the bookstore.

  “I thought I was coming out to you,” he said, letting her in.

  “Amy is driving me crazy,” Sophie said. “I left Wes to deal with her. She likes him better than me anyway.” She slid her arms around his waist and he pulled her close and kissed the top of her head. “And unlike Amy, you are calm,” Sophie said against his shirt. “I like that in a man.”

  “That’s been harder lately,” he said. “Dillie’s at Jamie Barclay’s. Want to come upstairs and watch TV in my bed?”

  “I didn’t even know you had a TV,” Sophie said.

  “ESPN2 has billiards on Wednesday nights,” Phin said.

  “Then of course you have a TV.”

  She piled his pillows at the head of the bed while he opened the cabinet that held his TV and flipped the channels to Temptation cable, and when he turned, she was propped up waiting for him, looking fairly comfortable and really good, even if she was back in khaki.

  “Do I get popcorn?” she said, and Phin looked at the kitchen clock and said, “We have five minutes before showtime. You may get something else.”

  “Oh, gee, a whole five minutes.” Sophie rolled her eyes. “That’s what I need, a guy with staying power.”

  He stretched out on the bed next to her. “Before I forget, Prizzi’s Honor.” He patted the bed. “ ‘Right here on the Oriental.’”

  “How’d you get that?”

  “Amy,” he said. “I asked her when she was in the hospital. Of course, she didn’t know what I was going to do with it.”

  Sophie laughed and kissed him, and he fell into all her softness and the heat of her mouth.

  “Funny you should mention that,” Sophie said as she snuggled closer. “I went to Hildy’s today to take her Dove Bars as a thank-you for rescuing me off her dock, and she had this book of ballads.”

  “Good,” Phin said, and bent to kiss her again, sliding his arm behind her head.

  “And ‘Julie Ann’ was in there,” Sophie said, ducking him a little so that he stopped. “And I think you had it wrong.”

  He lifted his head. “Wrong? My grandmother sang that song to me for years. You’re telling me my grandma was wrong?”

  “The last line,” Sophie said sternly, “says that they never found Julie, and they never found the bear.”

  “Right,” Phin said.

  “So they both disappeared,” Sophie said.

  “Right,” Phin said.

  “So it’s a pretty patriarchal assumption that the bear got Julie.” Sophie turned away from him a little and sliding her hand under the pillows. “I think Julie got the bear.”

  “Yeah, right,” Phin said, and then he felt something cold snap on the wrist he’d put behind her head, and when he sat up, Sophie had him handcuffed to the headboard.

  “Wes loaned them to me,” she said. “I have to give them back later tonight, though.”

  Phin tugged once on the cuffs as he felt something closely akin to panic. “This isn’t fanny. Give me the key.”

  Sophie sat cross-legged on the bed and shook her head. “Nope. It’s definitely Julie Ann’s turn this time.”

  Phin closed his eyes. “At least tell me you have the key.”

  “Of course I have the key.” He could feel Sophie leaning closer, and then he felt her working the buttons on his shirt open.

  “Sophie, I don’t th—” Phin began, but then her fingertips brushed his stomach, and every muscle he had tightened, and he shut up.

  She popped open the button on his pants and said, soft and slow, “Let me give you an orgasm you don’t have to work for,” and he looked into her liquid brown eyes and said, “Just don’t lose the key.” She laughed and kissed his stomach, and then he forgot about the key, and the murder, and Temptation in general, and surrendered to Sophie’s cool, searching fingers and her hot, hungry mouth.

  Fifteen minutes later, he was staring contentedly at the ceiling, counting his blessings which now seemed numerous, when he heard somebody pound on the downstairs door. Sophie sat up beside him, and he tried to do the same, only to realize he was still handcuffed to the bed. “The key—” he began, and then he saw she was looking past him to the television, stunned. “What?” he said, and she said, “That’s the wrong movie. That’s Cherished.”

  He turned and saw Rob on-screen, naked, reaching for Clea, also naked, and heard him say, “ ‘You definitely have discovery fantasies.’ ”

  Phin froze as the dialogue rolled over him.

  “ ‘We’re going to be having a lot of sex in public places,’ ” Rob said. “ ‘You want to know why?’ ”

  “ ‘No,’ ” Clea said and stretched for the camera.

  “ ‘Because you like it,’ ” Rob said, and reached for her, and then the movie cut to grainier film of bodies writhing, and Sophie said, “Oh my God, that’s Hot Fleshy Thighs!”

  The pounding got louder downstairs, and Phin turned to her and said, “Get me that key.”

  Sophie scrambled for it on the bedside table and unlocked the cuffs with shaking fingers while he watched the film go into such a tight close-up that it was almost impossible to tell what body parts were being filmed.

  Almost.

  Phin rolled out of bed and grabbed his pants. “Call Wes at the farm and tell him to meet me at the cable station.”

  “That’s not our movie,” Sophie said, as she grabbed the phone and punched in the numbers, “that’s Leo’s movie, I swear to God.”

  “I really don’t give a damn, Sophie,” Phin said. “My kid is watching that.”

  The picture flipped back to a naked Rob who said to a naked Clea, “ ‘Your soul is a corkscrew.’ ”

  “Phin—” Sophie’s voice broke, and then the picture snapped and turned dark, and she shut up. Either his TV was broken, or somebody had stormed the cable station and shut it down. He flipped the channel and saw a blond teenager kicking the hell out of a vampire. His TV was fine.

  His life, however, was broken.

  “I’m sorry,” Sophie whispered.

  “Yeah, so am I,” he said, and went downstairs to talk to the irate citizen pounding on the door.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Rachel sat across the table from Leo in Temptation’s only diner, mired in misery, while Leo put on his glasses and read the receipt the waitress had just handed him with his Visa card.

  He was leaving. He was going back to L.A. and leaving her stuck here in Temptation. And she loved him, damn it. That was the worst of it. It wasn’t that he was leaving her in Temptation, although that was bad enough.

  It was that he was leaving her. He didn’t love her. She couldn’t understand it at all. He’d kissed her that one glorious time, and he’d taken care of her when she’d gone to Wes, but that was it and now he was going and she was miserable.

  Leo checked his watch. “The movie started fifteen minutes ago,” he told her. “How long is it?”

  “The clean version? About half an hour.” Rachel leaned forward. “Leo, stop ignoring me.”

  Leo sighed. “I know you want to come to L.A., kid.”

  “I’m not a kid,” Rachel said. “I’m a good worker. I learn fast. You’re stupid not to take me.”

  “I’d be stupid to take you.” Leo signed the receipt and pocketed his Visa. “Even assuming your father didn’t come after me with a shotgun, I’d spend all my time looking after you. You stay here and have a normal life.”

  “I don’t want a normal life,” Rachel said. “If I wanted a normal life, I’d have done what my mother wanted and married Phin.”

  “Phin?” Leo scowled at her. “Phin’s not right for you.”

  “I know that—” Rachel began, and then stopped as she realized somebody was standing by their table.

  “You the guy that made that movie?” the man said, looking red in the face.

  “No,” Leo said. “Why?”

  “Because whoever did that is a fuck
ing pervert, that’s why,” the guy said.

  “What?” Rachel said.

  “Kids are watching that filth,” the man said, and glared at Leo. “Are you sure you’re not the guy?”

  “I’m positive,” Leo said mildly.

  “Well, you should just be glad you took your daughter out for dinner tonight instead of watching that trash with her—”

  “We have to go,” Rachel said, getting up.

  “My daughter!” Leo said, and Rachel leaned over and said, “Wow, Leo.”

  Leo watched as the man stalked away. “She’s not my daughter, you putz.”

  “Leo.”

  “Showed the wrong movie, did they?” Leo said, and Rachel said, “I think they saw the old Cherished instead of the clean cut that Amy made, and I need to talk to Sophie now.”

  Leo dropped his napkin on the table. “Okay. But I’d still like to hear—”

  “Now,” Rachel said, and dragged him from the diner.

  “I bagged the tape and sent it to Cincinnati,” Wes said two hours later when he and Phin were finally alone in the bookstore. “Maybe we’ll get some prints.”

  Phin shook his head, more tired than he could ever have imagined. It took a lot out of a mayor to have to deal with that many screaming citizens.

  “Phin,” Wes said. “Pay attention. We have to find out who took the tape. He violated the FCC up, down, and sideways, and we’ll get him.”

  “I can’t even think,” Phin said. “I’ve been explaining the unexplainable all night. Where the hell did that tape come from?”

  “From the farm,” Wes said. “According to Amy, it was Leo’s cut of a tape they’d made. I gather they made several versions.”

  “So whoever took that tape knew which one would do the most damage.” Phin felt anger rise, cool and clean. “Somebody at the farm—”

  “Not necessarily,” Wes said. “Amy said when Rachel saw what Leo had done to the movie, she took the tape and wrote ‘Smut, Smut, Smut’ on it in bright red marker. Anybody who wanted to sabotage the movie would have picked that one up.”

  “So somebody went out there and sorted through the tapes—”

  “No,” Wes said. “Somebody went out there and took all the tapes. As soon as the movie started, Amy went running to look. They’re all gone, even the documentary she was working on. Somebody just backed up a car while we were all at the hospital this morning and took every one of them.”

  “Who?” Phin said, but even as he said it, he knew.

  “Stephen’s got this movie tied to your tail,” Wes said. “This is a big break for him, just six weeks before the election. Six days would have been better, but six weeks isn’t bad. And he’s the only one I can see getting anything out of this.”

  Phin thought about Sophie. She’d gotten something out of it—out of making that damn movie at least. He heard his own stupid words coming out of Rob’s mouth and felt like a fool.

  Wes said, “You want to come to Stephen’s with me?”

  Phin thought of Stephen’s smug, red face, and the pain cleared and his rage focused. “Yes.”

  “Thought so,” Wes said.

  ❖ ❖ ❖

  Stephen answered the door, trying to look innocent and only looking smugger as a result. “I saw the premiere on television,” he said to Wes. “That was a shocking thing. I certainly hope—”

  “Forget it, Stephen,” Phin said, as he pushed past him into the living room where Rachel sat on the couch in patent misery. “You knew all about it.”

  Across the room, Virginia looked up from the phone she was clutching and lowered her voice. Spreading the good word as usual.

  Meanwhile Stephen was waxing indignant.

  “What do you mean, I knew about it? You think if I’d known that kind of disgusting pornography was going to be broadcast to the people of this town—”

  “Forget it, Stephen,” Wes said. “The only voters here are the ones who know what really happened.”

  Rachel jerked her head up. “What did happen? I couldn’t find Sophie to find out. That wasn’t our film—”

  “Young lady, you had nothing to do with that film,” Virginia said from the phone.

  “I worked on that film,” Rachel said. “I’m proud of that film, but that film wasn’t my film.”

  Virginia said, “I have to go,” into the phone and hung up. “You had nothing to do with that disgusting movie, so you stop even pretending you did.”

  “I’m not pretending, I worked hard on that,” Rachel said, and Virginia pointed her finger at her and said, “Enough. You’ve caused enough trouble acting up and from now on, you’re going to be the daughter I raised. You’re going to get married and settle down and be a good woman.” Virginia’s eyes slid to Phin.

  “She’s not marrying me,” Phin said.

  “She certainly isn’t,” Stephen said. “You’re responsible for that porn going out to all of Temptation, corrupting—”

  “Stephen,” Wes said. “I told you. You can knock off the speeches. Everybody here knows you switched that tape—”

  “Daddy?” Rachel said.

  “That’s the most ridiculous thing I ever heard of—” Stephen began.

  “—and we’re sending it to Cincinnati for a forensics check. The fingerprints will nail you if nothing else does.”

  “We’ll just have to wait and see, then, won’t we?” Stephen said, smug as ever, and Phin said, “Fuck. You wiped it before you played it, didn’t you?”

  “Phin!” Virginia said, and when Stephen said, “Well, that’s the kind of language I’d have expected from somebody who’d consort with the whores who made that trash,” Phin grabbed Stephen’s throat and shoved him against the wall.

  “About Sophie,” Phin said, rage making his voice shake. “You damned near killed her, you bastard, and I never came after you for that—”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Stephen choked, wide-eyed.

  “You shoved her in the river and almost drowned her,” Phin said, gripping him tighter, and Rachel said, “Daddy!” at the same time that Wes said, “Let him go, Phin.”

  “You hurt her.” Phin gripped his neck harder. “From now on, you come after me, you son of a bitch, not her, and not the people of this town— you do not show porn to kids to bring me down, do you understand? This is between us.”

  Stephen didn’t say anything, but he turned blue, and from behind him, Phin heard Wes say calmly, “He’s sick and smaller than you are and older than you are and not worth it. Let go of him, or I’ll break your arm.”

  Phin looked into Stephen’s sly, stupid, blue face and thought about all the crap Stephen had gotten away with because nobody had fought him— because I didn’t fight him, because I played it safe, because I was too damn lazy—

  Wes jerked Phin’s left arm up hard behind him, and the pain knifed into his shoulder, and he let go of Stephen and his own pent-up breath at the same time.

  “Thank you,” Wes said, releasing his arm as Stephen slid down the wall, an interesting shade of purple.

  “Ouch,” Phin said, and eased his shoulder back.

  “It would be bad if you killed him,” Wes said. “Understandable, but bad.” He looked at Stephen on the floor, trying to fill his lungs. “That ‘whore’ bit was a dumb move, Stephen. Don’t do that again.”

  Phin rubbed his arm and watched Stephen get his breath back. “Well, at least the short-term pleasure was great.” He leaned over and said softly to Stephen, “If you ever try to hurt Sophie again, I’ll let Wes break every bone in my body before I let you go.”

  “I didn’t hurt that woman,” Stephen rasped. “I don’t attack women. Have you lost your mind? Arrest him for assault, Wes. He’s crazy. He almost killed me.”

  “I didn’t see any assault,” Wes said. “I did see two men in heated conversation but—”

  “Well, my family saw.” Stephen climbed to his feet. “Rachel—” He stopped when he realized Rachel was gone. “You better get a lawyer,�
� he told Phin. “You’re in big trouble.”

  Virginia stared at them from across the room, horrified. “You’re a terrible man,” she told Phin. “I’ll never let you marry my daughter now.”

  “Well, at least something’s going my way.” Phin turned back to Stephen. “You shoved Sophie in the river, you stole that tape, and you played pornography on a public television station. Get your own lawyer, you son of a bitch.”