Wolf Logic

by Masha du Toit

  “That was your sister, huh?”

  Nico opened his eyes to see that Billy was watching him in the rear view mirror. He nodded.

  “She a cop?”

  The question surprised Nico. “No.” How could Gia be a cop? She was just Gia.

  “Why’s she in that uniform then?”

  Nico shrugged. He didn’t understand what he saw when he linked with Gia, the place she’d gone to after she left home. All those uniformed people, children locked up in small rooms, wolf-people in cages. He didn’t want to think about it anymore. He wanted to be left alone.

  “Of course she’s a cop,” said Spyker. “And a purist too. Didn’t you see the bracelets?”

  “Why’d she help us to get away then?” said Billy.

  Spyker ignored this and instead returned to his list of complaints. “Where are we going, anyway? You’re leading them straight back to our place. There must be a call-out for this car by now. You gonna wait ’til we see the blue lights before you do something about that?”

  Nico saw that Billy was still watching him in the rear-view mirror. For the first time since he’d met him, Billy seemed entirely serious, even a little worried, but he didn’t say anything for several minutes. Nico was so tired that Spyker’s voice was blurring into a stream of pale yellow and white shapes. When Billy finally interrupted, Nico had to concentrate to understand what he was saying.

  “You got any other brothers or sisters?”

  “No.”

  “Mommy and daddy?”

  Nico nodded. Billy grunted. Then the tick-tick of the indicator came on and Nico felt the car lurch as they changed lanes.

  “Hey. Where you going?” said Spyker.

  Getting Out

  They put Gia in one of the cells in the Prison Block. It was very small, just a metal cage without even a proper bunk to sleep on. Gia knew that despite its name, the building was not really a prison. It was a place for holding people in transit. Those who’d been arrested waited here to learn their fate. Those brought to Valkenberg for testing and questioning spent a few nights here. It was not a high-security installation, but that made little difference once the door clanged shut. She was stuck until somebody decided to let her out.

  From the moment that she entered Naudé’s office, everything had taken on a nightmare quality. It was as if she’d been sucked into a machine that quickly and efficiently judged and processed her. No matter what she said or did, it all led to this moment: the door of the cell closing behind her.

  Everyone had been perfectly civil. Even Mantjies had never raised his voice, which made it, somehow, harder to bear. The constables who’d escorted her from the Annex had even taken her to a toilet first and waited patiently outside the stall while she peed.

  “You don’t want to have to use the bucket,” one of them had said, as if this was all perfectly normal and ordinary. Now she sat shivering on the concrete ledge at the back of the cell, wishing above all things for a hot shower and some dry clothes.

  How long will they leave me in here?

  -oOo-

  Billy stopped the car a few houses away from Nico’s house. He turned and looked at Nico. “This is where we found you. Can you get home from here?”

  “And what’s going to stop him from giving us away?” said Spyker. “You let him out now and we’ll have the cops on us so fast—”

  “He doesn’t know where we’re going.” Billy’s eyes never left Nico’s. “And, anyway, you won’t tell on us, will you, buddy?”

  Nico shook his head.

  “Well, go ahead, then,” said Billy. “We’ll wait ’til we see you are safely inside. Go on.”

  Nico opened the car door, then looked back at Billy. The words built up inside him, a big tangle of them that felt like a pressure in his chest. “See,” he said. “See again?”

  Billy smiled. “I don’t know, dude, but I hope so. Let’s see what happens, okay?”

  Nico climbed out of the car. The door closing sounded loud in the night-time street.

  Billy rolled down the window. “I hope you won’t get into trouble for being away so long,” he said. “I’d come in and explain things, but most people don’t like the look of me.”

  Nico tried to smile. Then he bent through the window, wrapped his arms around the big man’s neck and kissed him on his hairy cheek.

  “Go on, then,” said Billy. “Don’t go and cry, now. We’re going to find a safe place and then we’ll come and visit. Give you that surfing lesson we never got round to. Go on.”

  At last, Nico wiped his eyes and headed down the street, away from the little car. Everything looked strange to him. How long had it been since that night he’d climbed out the bathroom window? He could see the light was still on in the downstairs studio. Karel must be working late. He knocked at the door.

  “Dad?”

  As soon as the studio door opened, he heard the car’s engine start up. Billy beeped the horn softly as they swept past then all Nico could see was the red of the brake lights receding into the night.

  -oOo-

  And then he was back in his own bed.

  There had been many questions, at first. Then the questions had stopped and Nico’s father had simply picked him up and hugged him. Up the stairs he’d gone and into the kitchen. There Karel sat and watched, silently, as Nico ate a sandwich and drank an enormous cup of hot chocolate.

  “Do you want a bath?” had been the only thing he’d said and at Nico’s emphatic headshake, “Well, I suppose that can wait ’til morning.”

  But he’d been made to change into his pyjamas. Karl had tucked him into the heavenly familiarity of his bed.

  “I’ll be back in a moment,” Karel had said and appeared a few seconds later dragging an armchair, which he set next to the bed, watching. At last his head had nodded and Nico knew by the change in his breathing that his father had fallen asleep. But although he closed his eyes and wished for sleep, Nico felt more awake than ever.

  It was wonderful to be home and his father’s presence, so close in the dark, was an inexpressible comfort, but the more he tried, the further sleep seemed.

  Would he ever see Billy and Spyker again, and would they find a safe hiding place? He supposed he could try linking with them. That was a strange thought. He’d never tried linking with anyone who was not close family.

  Then his thoughts went back to the Waterfront, to the strange and frightening events there. He’d have to ask Gia what had been going on. She’d been there too, maybe she could explain it.

  That thought made him open his eyes again and stare into the dark bedroom.

  Gia.

  Where was she now?

  -oOo-

  “Cadet?”

  Gia’s head jerked up and she realised she must have fallen asleep despite her fear. There was somebody at the gate. She recognised the slim silhouette.

  “Cadet Grobbelaar.” Lee’s voice was low but urgent. “Are you awake?”

  “Yes.” Gia tried to drive away the sleep fogging her mind. “What’s going on?”

  The cadet nodded at the guard as he passed behind her, then looked at Gia again. “Just coming to check on you. I heard you were in here.” As soon as the guard was out of sight round the corner, she lowered her voice again. “What is going on, Grobbelaar?”

  With a sinking heart, Gia heard the anger and suspicion in Lee’s voice. Her too. First Mantjies and now her.

  “You spoke to Mantjies?”

  “Yes.”

  “What did he tell you?”

  “He told me that you are a Belle Gente spy.”

  Gia leaned her head back against the concrete wall and closed her eyes. “Oh.”

  “Is it true?”

  “It is and it isn’t.”

  There was a clang and Gia opened her eyes. Lee had taken hold of the bars of the gate and must have shaken it. “Don’t play games with me, cadet. Did you lie to me? Are you lying now?”

  “I—” Gia felt tremendously tired. The events of
the night had drained her, but it seemed it was still not over. “I didn’t lie to you about the important things.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  Gia tried to see down the corridor beyond Lee. “Can anybody hear us now?”

  “The guard is up front. He can’t hear. Tell me what you mean. And the truth, this time. I don’t have to be here, you know. I came because—” She shook her head in frustration. “I don’t know why. Because I’m a fool and some part of me wants to believe there is an explanation.”

  “There is.” Gia rubbed her hands over her face, wishing she could force her thoughts into clarity. “I’ll try to explain, but it’s complicated.”

  As Lee waited in silence, Gia felt a strong reluctance to speak. Can I trust her, really? And how much can I explain? She’ll never believe me anything other than a traitor and isn’t that what I am? The memory of the screaming crowd, panicking under the Belle Gente gas attack rose once again.

  “I am not a Belle Gente agent.” Each word felt dangerous, a step on a narrow path with a death fall on either side. “But I did make a deal with them.”

  “Go on.”

  “They— You know I have a brother. A little brother who is different. He may have magical talent—”

  “He’s been tested. He showed no potential for magic.”

  “Um. Yes. But that’s not true. And the Belle Gente know it. Look it’s really complicated, but what it comes down to is that I was an idiot and I signed a contract that gave the Belle Gente power to take him from us. I didn’t know— Anyway, that’s all done now. The thing is, the only way I could see to get them to leave him alone was to agree to spy for them. Here.”

  “Just a moment.” Lee looked back over her shoulder. “No, it’s okay. I thought the guard was coming. So that’s why you had access to the passwords. It wasn’t just some random brak who gave them to you for some reason of his own. It was the Belle Gente who organised that.”

  “Yes.”

  “Go on.”

  “So I came here, but the rest of what I told you is completely true. I really did want to find out about the children and that’s why I was searching in the captain’s account and Mrs Solomons’s. Those letters I found are all real. And I really did hear the captain using the twitch. It’s all true.” She was staring into Lee’s face now, trying to make out her features. “You’re the only one who can help them, Lee. That’s why I told you.”

  There was a long silence. Lee stood without moving. At last, she spoke again, softer now. “And what about this thing Mantjies told me? About the gas formulae?”

  Gia hesitated. But there was no way around it. “Yes. He’s right. That was me.”

  Another silence. Then Lee’s quiet voice. “And how do you explain that?”

  “I can’t. I was an idiot. I was sending them information every day, using a computer programme that—” She stopped herself. She’d nearly said Brakman’s name. “That one of their agents who used to work here had set up. Lists of names, of people that Special Branch were watching.”

  Lee moved, but did not speak.

  “I got so into the habit of it, I guess I just forgot what I was doing.” Gia swallowed, wishing she had some water. Her mouth was so dry; the words felt sticky. “I mean I sort of forgot it was all real. I can’t excuse it, and after what I saw tonight, I guess I deserve whatever happens to me now.”

  There was another long silence.

  “What are you going to do now?” asked Gia.

  “I don’t know,” said Lee. “I don’t know whether I can believe you. Why should I?”

  “It doesn’t matter about me.” Gia was suddenly angry. “It doesn’t matter about me. But you have to do something about those children. You are the only one who can get them out of here.”

  “There is one way that I can test the truth of your words,” said Lee.

  Gia looked at Lee’s white-gloved hands, wrapped around the bars of the door. Fear touched her, a cold twist in her belly. She remembered the searchlight intensity of the blind man’s mind in her own, when she’d gone to face him and the White Lady to make her ill-fated bargain. She was not sure she could stand that kind of exposure a second time. But what choice do I have?

  “Okay,” she said, ashamed to hear the wobble in her voice. “You can— Read my thoughts? What can you see?”

  “Your mind is not a book, so I cannot read it. But I can search through your memories, call up things you saw, know what you felt. No space for lies, there.” Lee was already pulling off her gloves.

  Gia wanted to speak, but dared not. She got to her feet.

  Lee’s bare hands were hardly less white than her gloves. Gia reached out. The cadet’s touch was cool and firm, the long fingers wrapping around hers. Gia braced for the shock, but nothing happened.

  “Now,” said Lee. “It’s best if you don’t try to push thoughts at me, or try to resist. Just let yourself remember. Try to remember everything. Start with your brother. He seems to be at the core of it all.”

  The cadet’s voice was calm now, almost gentle. Gia took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

  Nico. Think of Nico. His small body shivering in her arms only a few hours ago. Of Billy hoisting him over the fence. Saraswati, in the shower with Nico after he’d been tested at Valkenberg, hot water streaming down as she sang to him. Saraswati, tearing the silver bracelets from her arms in agony as white feathers covered her skin. The White Lady’s face in the lamplight; even in the storm of memory, Gia wondered at the similarity between that woman’s face and her mother’s, as she accepted Gia’s offered bargain.

  Scene after scene uncoiled. Her horror at the doctor’s chair, the white light glinting on Sash’s hair. The messages from Nico. The computer screen, revealing its secrets. Mandy, hugging her one last time. At last the torrent slowed and stopped. Gia surfaced, finding herself leaning against the cold bars of the gate, her hands still in Lee’s. She felt hollow, shaking as though she’d been crying for hours. Lee released her grasp and Gia slid down to sit at her feet.

  “So. You believe me now?” she whispered.

  “You told the truth about the letters.”

  “Yes.”

  “I saw many other things too. There’s a lot I’ll have to think about, but you told me the truth. About the lies that the captain has been telling. And you told me the truth about why you did it all. You are not acting for the Belle Gente anymore. That’s all I need to know.”

  “What are you going to do now?” Gia felt strangely detached, as though the answer did not affect her.

  “About you? Nothing. If I’m going to help Mienkie and the rest I’ll have to work from inside. I can’t do anything that will make anyone doubt my loyalty.”

  And what will happen to me? But Gia did not speak the words. Fear was beginning to gnaw at her, but she didn’t succumb to it yet. “So you’ve got a plan?” she asked.

  “Yes.”

  “But it’s probably better if I don’t know anything about it, right?”

  “Right.”

  “Well, good.” Gia got to her knees, then hoisted herself up, holding onto the bars. Her legs still felt too weak to hold her steady. “I guess you better go then.”

  Lee looked at her for a long moment. “Yes.”

  Gia watched the cadet walk down the corridor, nodding a greeting to the guard. She still felt numb, but a coal of fear was burning in her now. She felt powerless to douse it, wrung out by the rush of memory that Lee had drawn from her.

  Now what?

  Now I wait.

  The concrete seat was as hard as ever, the cell as cold. She wished she could slip back into sleep, but her thoughts spun round and round, keeping her awake. An hour passed. Or maybe not. She had no way of knowing. No window to show the sky outside.

  Where is Nico now? She dug the die out of her pocket and rolled it in her fingers, wondering, once again how he did it. Not much chance she’d ever find out now. Would she ever see him again?

  The die tw
itched in her fingers, then wriggled loose, rising to hover before her startled eyes. “What—”

  It hung there then moved away, evading her attempt at catching it. “Nico?” Then, remembering where she was, she whispered, “Is that you?”

  The die spun and stopped, still hovering. Yes. Then it dodged away from her. She got up, following. It jumped ahead and pinged against the lock in the gate and settled on it. Gia bent to see what word was uppermost.

  Go.

  “But it’s locked, Nico—oh. Oh!” Understanding dawned. It had been Nurse Richards who’d explained it to her. Telekinesis. The ability to move things without touching them. She flattened her hands over the lock. “What should I do, Nico? Is this good?”

  The die rotated. “Yes.”

  She could feel it already, the vibration of small parts moving. Then she heard the steady tread of the guard’s feet. She backed into the shadows, watching him pass. It was only a few minutes, but it felt excruciatingly long. At last the guard walked past once more then headed back down the corridor. Gia darted forward and placed her hands on the lock again. It clicked under her hands and she heard the slightest grinding as the mechanism rotated. She waited, listening. The guard was up front again. The back door would certainly be locked; there was no sense in going in that direction. But maybe— She slipped out of the cell, wincing at the slight squeak as the gate swung open then closed again. She heard the lock engage.

  Good. That will puzzle them.

  A few steps down and to the right. The toilet cubicles. They were brightly lit and all the doors stood open. Not a good place to hide. But he wouldn’t come in here, surely, not unless he noticed her cell was empty. And with so many other empty cells, maybe he wouldn’t notice for a while? Too late to worry about that now.

  She slipped behind the door and waited. How often did he do his walk down the corridor?

  At last she heard him again, walking slowly, humming to himself. As soon as he was past she stole out into the corridor and, not daring to run, walked quietly to the front. If he turned, or looked behind him—but there it was. The end of the corridor, blissfully unobstructed, no gate to bar her way. But round the corner she nearly groaned in frustration. Another gate. Locked.