Insanity

by Kira Moericke

  “I know your secret.”

  “You do?” Lexi’s dark eyes widened in surprise. She quickly stood up from her desk chair.

  I nodded. Opening my mouth, I was going to confront her of being a witch, but before I could, she spoke first.

  “Oh, wow.” A smile leaked across her face. Her demeanor shifted, and she no longer looked like high-class snob, but just a normal seventeen-year-old girl. “I can’t believe it. I was so scared of anyone finding out.”

  My face twisted in confusion. My hand loosened slightly from around the salt container. What was she talking about? Were we talking about the same thing?

  “What?”

  “Oh, Em.” She shook her head as if saying I was silly. “I was so afraid to tell anyone. Even Fauna and Flora don’t know.”

  “Who?” I was getting even more confused.

  “My friends?” she said.

  Oh. The blond twins that hung around her all the time. Those were their names? Poor girls.

  She squealed, and I took a startled step back. Never in the three weeks I’ve been here have I heard or even imagined Lexi Leclercq squealing. “I’m just so happy that you know.”

  Okay, now I definitely knew that we weren’t talking about the same thing. “Wait. What are you talking about?”

  “That I like you, silly.” Then before I could react, she took several steps closer to me, grabbed my shoulders, and kissed me.

  My eyes widened and I stiffened in surprise.

  When she pulled away, she was grinning from ear to ear. “Ugh, I’m just so happy! I’m so sorry I was acting like a bitch before. It’s just that when I like someone, I don’t know how to act around them.” Then she saw my face and her smile drooped like a wilted flower. “Em?”

  I had the sudden urge to wipe off my lips, but I restrained myself. Looking up at Lexi, I stuttered, “You’re…you’re…”

  “Gay?” she offered.

  I nodded numbly.

  “Yeah, but aren’t you…I thought…” Her face twisted into one of bewilderment. She couldn’t even finish her sentence. But I knew what she was trying to say.

  I recoiled, then instantly felt a wave of guilt rush through me. Pressing my lips together, I said, “I’m not.”

  “You aren’t?”

  I slowly shook my head.

  “But I saw you looking at me,” she said taking several steps back. She looked so confused, and I felt sort of bad that I had led her on. Even if I hadn’t meant to.

  “I…I thought you were a witch,” I said sheepishly.

  “A witch?”

  I nodded. “Nova and I were talking and she claimed that there was a witch at Brier Hall–”

  “Of course Nova would suggest me,” Lexi said, frowning. She rolled her eyes.

  “Actually…” I hedged, “it was me.”

  “Wait. You thought I was witch?”

  “I’m sorry?” My apology sounded more like a question.

  “Why?” She sounded hurt.

  I swallowed a nervous lump that was starting to build in the back of my throat. “Well, the cold looks you always gave me gave me the impression first.”

  “Sorry.” She blushed a light shade of pink.

  “And then I received this note.” I reached into my back pocket and pulled out the note that I found at my door a few days ago. Unfolding it, I passed it over to her.

  “I did not write this,” she said, observing the paper. “It’s not my handwriting. And besides, it says ‘stay away from him.’ Sounds more like a jealous girlfriend.” She passed the note back. “And besides, as you just found out, I’m not interested in guys.”

  Taking the note and stuffing it back into my back pocket, I realized that she was right. Lexi had no reason to write the note. But then I remembered the last piece of evidence that I had.

  “But Nova looked up your name on the school’s website,” I said. “You didn’t appear on it at all.”

  “What did you guys search?”

  “‘Lexi Leclercq.’”

  A small smile rose across her lips. “Of course you’re not going to find anything. Lexi isn’t my real name.”

  “It’s not?”

  She shook her head. “No, that’s just what everyone calls me. My actual name is Alexia.”

  Oh. Now it all made sense.

  I suddenly felt embarrassed. I could feel my cheeks flame up, and the sudden urge to run away grasped me. I had to dig my heels into the scuffed wooden floor to hold myself in place.

  “I can’t believe you thought that I was a witch.” Hurt appeared on Lexi’s face. She suddenly looked like one of the women that you’d see in old oil paintings that you’d find in a museum.

  “I’m really sorry,” I apologized, even though I knew it wouldn’t be enough.

  Ugh! This is why I hate confrontation.

  “I think you should go,” Lexi told me. She lifted her dark brown eyes to me.

  I swallowed, feeling a sudden lump build up inside my throat, but didn’t hesitate. Turning, I muttered I’m sorry as I hurried from the room.

  “How did it go?” Jayden asked. He had been waiting down the hall for me.

  I shook my head and started to make my way down the hall to my room. “It wasn’t her.”

  “No?”

  “No.”

  “What about what you told me with Nova? That she didn’t appear on the school’s enrollment list?”

  “It’s because her name isn’t Lexi,” I replied.

  “It isn’t?” Jayden’s face twisted into confusion.

  I shook my head again. “No, it’s Alexia. Lexi is just what everyone calls her.”

  Jayden and I were silent for a moment as we continued to go down the hall. People buzzed past us, though they barely paid any attention to us. They were all too busy thinking about the dance that was in two days.

  “So,” Jayden started after a long moment, “what does it mean?”

  I turned my head to look up at him. “What does what mean?”

  “I mean, about the…witch.” Skepticism was smeared all over the word witch.

  Oh. I turned to look forward as something cold settled in the pit of my stomach. A chill rushed through me, and I struggled to suppress a shiver.

  “It means our witch is still out there.”

  TWENTY–FOUR

  “CASEY!” I RUSHED to him as soon as I spotted him in the ballroom later that night. I ran over to him and slipped into his open arms. I clung onto him tightly. I hadn’t seen him in two days, though it felt more like two centuries. So much has happened to me since that one night.

  “Em.” Casey wrapped me in his arms, burying his face in my hair. “I have been waiting for you.”

  “I know. I’m sorry.” I stepped out of his arms and tucked a long strand of hair behind my ear. “There’s been a lot of stuff going on.”

  “Oh?” He raised his brows at me, as if telling me to say more.

  I froze for a second, not knowing what to say. I wanted to tell Casey about what had happened to me these past few days, but something inside me hesitated. What if he thought I was crazy? What if he never wanted to see me again? So, after a moment, I finally reply, “There’s an upcoming dance that everyone’s been excited about.”

  “A dance? Here?”

  I nodded. “It’s called the Autumn Ball. I was going to tell you about it the other night, but before I could, you vanished.” I remembered turning back before I left the ballroom to find it empty. Blinking, I focused back on Casey, who was standing close. Dangerously close. I could feel my body wanting to gravitate toward him, to be in his arms again, and never have him let me go.

  “And…and I was wondering…” My words got lost as Casey reached up, stroking the side of my face as his eyes stared into mine. A sliver of an amused smile played across his lips. His eyes twinkled deviously.

  “Yes?” he said huskily.

  “I was wondering if you would want to go?” The words were a struggle to get out. He was toying with
me, but at that moment, I didn’t care. I wanted to get close to him. Really close.

  He’s not truly there, a voice in my head reminded me.

  “I would love to go.” He smiled warmly. His smile made me smile.

  Oh, boy. I really needed to get my hormones in check.

  “Care for a walk?” Casey asked, stepping away from me. He dropped his hand from my face, leaving the spot where his hand had been cold.

  I nodded. “Sure.”

  Casey offered me his arm, which I took without hesitation. I let him guide me out of the ballroom and out of Brier Hall. We glided across the backyard under the moonlight.

  We strolled in comfortable silence, just taking in one another’s company. After a moment, though, I figured I should say something.

  “It’s really beautiful out here tonight,” I stated. I tilted my head all the way back. The stars were twinkling in and out of the black velvety sky.

  “Not as beautiful as you are,” I heard Casey say.

  I turned my head to look at him. A smile played across my lips. Seriously? Why did he have to say something like that? It was literally heart-melting.

  I glanced back at Brier Hall that loomed behind us. There were only a few lights on, but otherwise, it was mostly dark. I wondered how it used to be back when Casey was alive. I bet it was filled with laughter and hope.

  “What is it, my darling?” Casey asked.

  I turned to look at him. “It’s nothing. I was just wondering what this place was like back when you were…when you were…”

  “Alive?” he offered.

  I nodded.

  Casey looked over my head back at Brier Hall. I could see his eyes fog over as he recalled a lifetime of past memories.

  “The place was constantly alive with laughter and music. My father built this place, brick by brick. It took a little over a year to make it as grand as it is now.

  “My father loved his parties; the guests, the music, the food. He loved every moment of it, even though my mother ended up stewed by the end of the evening.”

  I stared at him, wanting him to continue.

  “We had so many parties that they all began to blur, though there is one that I can remember as if it were a vivid dream.”

  “Only one?” My brows pinched in confusion.

  He nodded and shifted his eyes toward me. “The one where I met you.”

  I didn’t have anything to say. I was too stunned for words.

  Casey shifted so that he stood directly in front of me. He wrapped his arms around me, drawing me near. “I love you, Em.”

  This time, I did know what to say. “I love you, too.”

  I saw Casey’s eyes flit to my mouth. He wanted to kiss me. Probably as much as I wanted to kiss him.

  Reaching up to tangle my fingers in his silky hair, I closed my eyes and pressed my lips against his. The kiss was soft at first, but quickly deepened. It was the type of kiss that would make Casanova weak in the knees. And we only had the moon as our witness.

  TWENTY–FIVE

  “ARE YOU SURE about that dress?” Lena asked Saturday evening as she and I got ready for the dance. We had decided to meet in Lena’s room to do our hair and make-up.

  I looked down at the dress that hugged my body perfectly.

  Well, of course it does. It was made for you.

  Actually, it was made for Emilia, a voice in my head countered.

  I closed my eyes as a wave of feelings washed over me. I wished I could remember what life was like then…When I was her.

  Opening my eyes, I focused on Lena, who was standing in front of her mirror wearing only a silky purple house robe. She told me that she wanted to put on her dress last so that she could surprise everyone.

  “Yes,” I told her.

  “It just…it looks so vintage.” Her brows furrowed as she brushed a dark shade of blush across her freckled cheeks.

  “And what’s wrong with vintage?”

  “It’s just…why hang onto the past when you could be living in the present? And speaking of present…” She put her blush and brush back into her make-up case, then rushed over to her closet, pulling out a pretty blue dress. “You can wear this if you want.”

  I looked at the dress. It was a beautiful frost–blue A-line gown, with lace sleeves. I reached forward, running my fingers along the silky material. “Lena…”

  “Do you like it?” she asked, happiness radiating in her voice.

  “It’s beautiful,” I told her.

  “If you want to wear it instead of that one, you totally can. I only wore the dress, like, one time.”

  I slowly pulled my hand away from the dress, realizing what she was trying to do.

  “Lena, seriously, stop. I’m wearing this dress.” I couldn’t help the way my voice rose with growing aggravation.

  Lena huffed out a sigh.

  “Fine,” she said bitterly as she turned and hung the dress back into her closet. “I was only trying to help.”

  Well, stop it.

  Ignoring Lena’s bitter tone, I turned to the mirror and started to do my hair. I had decided to wear it up in in a crown braid.

  “So, is Jayden supposed to meet you here or down at the dance?” Lena asked after several long moments of silence.

  “I’m not exactly sure,” I admitted as I stuffed the last bobby pin into my hair. “We didn’t really discuss it.”

  “Well, that’s kind of something that you need to know.”

  “Jayden and I’ve been kind of busy with other things,” I admitted vaguely. I couldn’t tell her about how he and I had gone witch hunting.

  Turning to Lena’s cluttered dresser, I spotted some stick-on rhinestones. Holding up the container, I asked, “Can I wear some of these?”

  Lena looked back at me from where she was finishing putting on make-up. “Yeah. Sure.”

  Turning back to the plastic, gold-color gems, I opened up the container and started to put rhinestones over the moles scattered by my left eye, making them sparkle just like the real constellation that Casey had told me about.

  Lena and I gossiped for a little while longer before there was a soft knock on the door.

  “Who is it?” Lena called as she slipped dangly black feather earrings into her ears.

  The door opened slightly, and Jayden stuck his head inside. His eyes scoped around, stopping when they landed on me. “I was wondering if I could steal Em away for a moment?”

  “Yeah.” I brushed one last stroke of rose-gold– colored blush across my cheeks before quickly gathering my make-up and putting it back into my make-up bag. “I’m done getting ready anyways.”

  I left my make-up bag on Lena’s dresser, then slipped away from the room.

  “Hey, what’s up?” I asked once Jayden and I were alone in the hallway. Everyone must have been at the dance already.

  Jayden didn’t say anything. Instead, he just looked at me, his eyes sweeping from my head to my feet then up again.

  A corner of my lips inched upwards in a small smile. “Jayden?”

  “Huh? Oh.” He blinked. Color rushed to his cheeks and he brushed back his curls. “Sorry. It’s just…you look amazing.”

  Now it was my turn to blush. Glancing down, I ran my hands down the front of my dress, smoothing out invisible wrinkles. “Thanks.”

  “So, um, I know this is usually a prom thing, but my mom sent me this to give to you.” He reached inside the pocket of his suit jacket and pulled out a small box. Inside sat a champagne-colored carnation tipped with gold glitter.

  A corsage.

  Something washed through me…an emotion that I always felt when I came across flowers: sadness and something else. Despair perhaps?

  “Jayden, you didn’t have to–”

  “I know,” he cut in. “It was actually my mom’s idea. She’s really happy that I met someone here.” He suddenly looked bashful.

  “Jayden…” I didn’t know what to say, so instead, I slipped onto my tiptoes and placed a peck on his cheek,
leaving only a slight smudge of my nude lipstick. I reached up and swiped it away with my thumb. “I’m glad I met you, too.”

  He smiled, which sent a smile to rise across my own lips. “May I?”

  I nodded, and he slipped the corsage onto my wrist, even though there was a part of me that didn’t want it.

  “Are you ready to head to the dance?” he asked, looking into my eyes.

  “Yeah.”

  Jayden fixed his face to a serious expression, though I saw his smile struggling to appear. He stuck his arm out for me to take. “May I have the honor of escorting milady to the Autumn Ball?”

  I giggled at Jayden’s fake British accent, but accepted his arm anyway. “Of course, kind sir.”

  Together we made our way down the deserted halls.

  ***

  Mike Simpson’s “Rumple’s Palace Party” blasted through speakers when Jayden and I stepped into the ballroom. The thumping bass made the small crystals on the chandelier shiver. The room was dim besides one giant light that came from the DJ’s table, which faded into the crowd, and red, yellow, and orange strobe lights that flew around the room.

  “Wow.” I stopped in the doorway to take everything in. “They really go far out for a bunch of freaks, don’t they?”

  Jayden shrugged. “They try to pretend that this is a normal high school filled with normal students, even though everyone in this room has broken the law or is crazy.”

  Crazy. If he knew that I was one of the Crazies, would he still like me?

  “Wanna dance?” Jayden asked, making me snap away from my worries.

  I took another quick glance around then nodded. “Sure.”

  Jayden and I moved through the thicket of bodies toward the center of the ballroom. I was nervous to move at first, so I only swayed slightly from side to side. But as the songs continued, I started to feel more comfortable in my surroundings and finally let lose.

  After a long line of up-beat songs, a slow one finally broke through. I sucked in a deep breath of air, filling my lungs to maximum capacity before letting it all go at once. I was suddenly tired and was thankful for the break of the slow song.