Venetia

by Georgette Heyer

  ‘I still tell you that it is not possible!’

  ‘Good God, Damerel, you don’t mean to talk propriety to me, do you?’ she exclaimed. ‘I warn you, you won’t easily convince me that the least impropriety attaches to a woman of my years choosing rather to live in her own house than in her brother’s! If I were a girl –’

  ‘You are not only a girl, but a green girl!’

  ‘Green I’ll allow, girl I will not! I’m five-and-twenty, my friend. I know it would be thought improper if I were to live alone, and though I think it nonsensical I don’t mean to outrage the conventions, I promise you. While Aubrey is at Cambridge I shall engage a chaperon. When he has taken his degree – well, I don’t know yet, of course, but I expect he will next become a Fellow, and remain fixed in Cambridge, in which event the likeliest chance is that I shall keep house for him there, for I shouldn’t think he would marry, should you?’

  ‘God give me patience!’ he ejaculated, springing up, and taking a hasty turn about the room. ‘Venetia, will you stop talking like a sapskull? Engage a chaperon! Keep house for Aubrey! Don’t forget to buy a stock of caps suitable for a dowager, or an ageing spinster, I do beg of you! Listen to me, you beautiful idiot! you’ve wasted six – seven – years of your life: don’t waste any more! What, for heaven’s sake, do you imagine would be the advantage in this house of yours? Who is to be your chaperon?’

  ‘I don’t know: how should I? I had supposed that it must be possible to hire, as one would a governess, some lady in impoverished circumstances – a widow, perhaps – who would answer the purpose.’

  ‘Then suppose it no longer! You might hire a score of widows, but not one to answer the purpose. I can picture this establishment! Where is it to be? In Kensington, I think, genteel and retired! Or perhaps in the wilds of Upper Grosvenor Place: just on the fringe of fashion! You will be dismally bored, my dear, I assure you!’

  She looked a little amused. ‘Then I shall travel. I have always wanted to do that.’

  ‘What, with an impoverished widow for escort, no acquaintance anywhere but in Yorkshire, and rather less knowledge of the world than a chit out of boarding-school? My poor innocent, when I think of the only friendships you would be likely to form under such circumstances I promise you my blood runs cold! It won’t do: believe me, I know what I’m talking about! To carry off such an existence as you propose you must needs be fabulously wealthy, and eccentric into the bargain! Wealth, my dear delight, would excuse your eccentricity, and open most doors to you. You might hire a mansion in the best part of town, furnish it with oriental magnificence, force yourself on the notice of the ton by indulging in expensive freaks, boldly send out invitation cards – you would meet with some rebuffs, and not a few cuts-direct, but –’

  ‘Be quiet, you absurd creature!’ she interrupted, laughing. ‘That’s not the life I want! How could you think I should?’

  ‘I don’t think it. Are you going to tell me that you want the life you would most certainly lead under your own scheme? You will be more bored and more lonely than ever in your life, for I assure you, Venetia, without acquaintance, without the correct background, you had as well live on a desert island as in London!’

  ‘Oh, dear! Then what am I to do?’

  ‘Go to your Aunt Hendred!’ he replied.

  ‘I mean to do so – but not to stay. I shouldn’t like that – or she either, I fear. Nor would her house do for Aubrey.’

  ‘Aubrey, Aubrey! Think for once of yourself!’

  ‘Well, and so I do! You know, Damerel, I never thought I could bear to stay at Undershaw with another woman as its mistress, and now I’ve discovered that it would fret me very much to live under such conditions anywhere! And to live with my aunt and uncle, submitting to their decrees, as I should be obliged to do, recognising their authority, would be unendurable, like finding myself back again in the nursery! I’ve been my own mistress for too long, dear friend.’

  He looked at her across the room, a wry smile on his lips. ‘You would not have to endure it for very long,’ he said.

  ‘Too long for me!’ she said firmly. ‘It will be five years at least, I imagine, before Aubrey will be ready to set up in a house of his own, and perhaps by then he won’t wish it! Besides –’

  ‘Greenhead! Oh, greenest of greenheads!’ he said. ‘Go to your aunt, let her launch you into society – as she is well able to do! – and before Aubrey has gone up to Cambridge the notice of your engagement will be in the Gazette!’

  She did not speak for a moment, but looked straitly at him, a little less colour in her cheeks, no lurking smile in her eyes. She could find no clue to his thoughts in his face, and was puzzled, but not alarmed. ‘No,’ she said at last. ‘It won’t be. Did you think that my purpose in going to London was to find a husband?’

  ‘Not your purpose. Your destiny – as it should be!’

  ‘Ah! My aunt’s purpose will be to find a husband for me?’ He answered only with a shrug, and she got up, saying: ‘I’m glad you’ve warned me: is it allowable for an unmarried female to put up at an hotel? If she has a maid with her?’

  ‘Venetia – !’

  She smiled, putting up her eyebrows. ‘My dear friend, you are too stoopid today! Why must you picture me moped to tears, pining for company, bored because I shall be leading the life I’m accustomed to? Why, no! a much more entertaining life! Here, I’ve had books, and my garden, and, since my father died, the estate, to occupy me. In London, there will be museums, and picture-galleries, the theatre, the opera – oh, so much that to you seems commonplace, I daresay! And I shall have Aubrey during his vacations, and since I have an aunt who won’t, I hope, cut my acquaintance, I don’t utterly despair of forming a few agreeable friendships!’

  ‘No, my God, no!’ he exclaimed, as though the words had been wrenched out of him, and crossed the room in two hasty strides. ‘Anything were better than that!’ He grasped her by the shoulders, so roughly that she was startled into uttering a protest. He paid no heed to it, but said harshly: ‘Look at me!’

  She obeyed unhesitatingly, and endured with tranquillity a fierce scrutiny as keenly searching as a surgeon’s lancet, only murmuring, a little mischievously: ‘I bruise very easily!’

  His grip slackened, and slid down her arms to gather her hands together, and hold them, clasped strongly between his own. ‘What were you doing when you were nine years old, my dear love?’ he asked.

  It was so unexpected that she could only blink.

  ‘Tell me!’

  ‘I don’t know! Learning lessons, and sewing samplers, I suppose – and what in the world has that to say to anything?’

  ‘A great deal. Do you know what I was doing at that date?’

  ‘No, how should I? I don’t even know how old you were – at least, not without doing sums, which I abominate. Well, if you are eight-and-thirty now, and I am five-and-twenty –’

  ‘I’ll spare you the trouble: I was two-and-twenty, and seducing a married lady of quality.’

  ‘So you were!’ she agreed affably.

  A laugh shook him, but he said: ‘That was the first of my amorous adventures, and probably the most discreditable. So I hope! There is nothing whatsoever in my life to look back upon with pride, but until I met you, my lovely one, I could at least say that my depravity stopped short of tampering with the young and innocent. I never ruined any reputation but Sophia’s – but don’t account it a virtue in me! It’s a dangerous game, seducing virgins, and, in general, they don’t appeal to me. Then I met you, and, to be frank with you, my dear, I stayed in Yorkshire for no other purpose than to win you – on my own terms!’

  ‘Yes, you told me as much, when we parted on that first day,’ she said, quite unperturbed. ‘I thought it a great piece of impertinence, too! Only then Aubrey had that fall, and we became such good friends – and everything was changed.’

  ‘Oh, no, no
t everything! You call me your friend, but I never called you mine, and never shall! You remained, and always will, a beautiful, desirable creature. Only my intentions were changed. I resolved to do you no hurt, but leave you I could not!’

  ‘Why should you? It seems to me a foolish thing to do.’

  ‘Because you don’t understand, my darling. If the gods would annihilate but space and time – but they won’t, Venetia, they won’t!’

  ‘Pope,’ she said calmly. ‘And make two lovers happy. Aubrey’s favourite amongst English poets, but not mine. I see no reason why two lovers should not be happy without any meddling with space and time.’

  He released her hands, but only to pull her into his arms. ‘When you smile at me like that, it’s all holiday with me! O God, I love you to the edge of madness, Venetia, but I’m not mad yet – not so mad that I don’t know how disastrous it might be to you – to us both! You don’t realise what an advantage I should be taking of your innocence!’ He broke off suddenly, jerking up his head as the door opening on to the passage from the ante-room slammed. The sound was followed by that of a dragging footstep. Damerel said quickly: ‘Aubrey. As well, perhaps! There’s so much that must be said – but not today! Tomorrow, when we are both cooler!’

  There was no time for more; he put her almost brusquely away from him, and turned, as the door was opened, to face Aubrey, who came into the room with his pointer-bitch at his heels.

  Fourteen

  Damerel had placed himself between Venetia and the door, but it was immediately apparent that the precaution was unnecessary. Aubrey was looking stormy, his thin cheeks flushed, and his rather cold gray eyes full of sparks of light. His interest in his fellow-creatures was at the best of times perfunctory; when in the grip of anger he had none whatsoever, and would scarcely have noticed it had he found his sister in Damerel’s arms. He said, in a brittle voice, as he shut the door: ‘You’ll like to know, Venetia, that the Empress has issued a new ukase! The dogs – my dogs! – must in future be kept chained up! All but Bess here, who is too savage to be kept at all! Take care, Jasper: can’t you see what an ugly-tempered bitch she is?’

  Damerel, who was gently pulling the pointer’s ears, while she stood with gracefully waving tail and an expression on her face of idiotic bliss, laughed, and said: ‘What’s she been doing?’

  ‘Endangering the succession!’ Aubrey snapped. ‘She came into the house – looking for me, of course! – and Charlotte finding her lying at the foot of the stairs was so startled and appalled that she let out a screech, which made Bess lift up her head, and stare at her – as well she might!’

  ‘Oh dear!’ sighed Venetia. ‘I know Charlotte doesn’t care for dogs, but if that’s all that happened –’

  ‘All! It was but the start of Bess’s ferocious assault! Understand, m’dear, that her stare put Charlotte forcibly in mind of a wild beast! She knew not what to do, but decided on retreat – backwards, and stealthily! Whereupon Bess, not unnaturally intrigued, you may think, rose, and advanced towards her. Charlotte then screamed in good earnest, and ran behind a chair; Bess followed, Mrs Scorrier burst out from the morning-room to discover what villain was attempting to rape her child, and started scolding Bess, and striking at her with the thing she had in her hand – what-d’ye call it? tambour frame? So Bess began to bark, Charlotte fell into hysterics, and –’

  ‘Aubrey, how could you have allowed it?’ exclaimed Venetia, between annoyance and amusement. ‘It was too bad of you!’

  ‘You’re mistaken: I wasn’t there. What I’m recounting I had from the lips of the afflicted ladies.’ He grinned sardonically at his sister. ‘I was your good little brother, m’dear! I arrived in the arena to find Charlotte sunk into a chair, with Mrs Scorrier waving her vinaigrette under her nose, and Bess baying the pair of them, but wagging her tail to show that though she wouldn’t stomach being chased from her own house she was too well-bred to bite. I didn’t think it of the least use to try sicking her on to the Empress, so I called her off. I even told that henhearted little ninny that she’d no need to be afraid, but all the thanks I got was abuse from the Empress. I brought Bess into the house on purpose to frighten Charlotte; my manners, character, and disposition all passed under unfavourable review, while Charlotte bleated Oh, pray, Mama! Oh, no, Mama! I think I bore it pretty well. Only when the Empress got to talking of Charlotte’s delicate situation I couldn’t resist! Not if I’d tried to, which I didn’t. She said that perhaps I didn’t realise, to which I replied that indeed I did, for Bess was in the same interesting condition. For one halcyon moment I thought she was going off in an apoplexy.’

  ‘Fiend!’ Venetia said, trying not to laugh.

  ‘Yes, and, what’s worse, one who thinks because he is a cripple he may go his length,’ said Aubrey, in a silken tone. ‘Oh, don’t look like that, stoopid! Do you imagine I haven’t known from the outset how abhorrent my limp is to the pair of them? I’m sure I don’t blame them for that – but Nurse did! By that time, you understand, she had come bustling downstairs to discover what was the reason for all the commotion. You missed a high treat, m’dear! She told the Empress to think shame on herself: she told Charlotte to stop kicking up such an uproar about nothing; and she told me to go away before I forgot that I at least had been taught better than to raise such a nasty, vulgar disturbance in a gentleman’s establishment!’

  ‘That was the most unkindest cut of all!’ remarked Damerel. ‘I’d back your nurse against fifty Mrs Scorriers!’

  ‘Well, the issue was undecided when I left, but I daresay Nurse will come off the best,’ agreed Aubrey. ‘The cream of the jest is that she, who always cuts up stiff when even Conway brings his dogs into the house, flew up into the boughs when the Empress announced that she would not allow me to keep Bess unless kennelled, since she was clearly dangerous! She was so imprudent as to order me to chain her immediately, and to demand if I had not heard her, when I turned my back upon all that monstrous regiment, and brought Bess along the passage to my own room. The last I heard of the battle was a demand from Nurse to know what right the Empress quite falsely supposed she had to dictate to a Lanyon born in his own house.’

  ‘Oh dear!’ Venetia sighed. She glanced at Damerel, a hint of shyness in her smile. ‘I must go, and do what I can to settle the dispute. Nurse will start quoting from the Book of Proverbs: she was doing so to me only yesterday, all about brawling and contentious women, and how much better it is to dwell in the corner of the housetop – not that I think she would consent to do so, if that means the attics!’

  ‘Don’t be a sapskull!’ Aubrey interrupted sharply. ‘Let her say what she chooses to that virago! If she can rid us of her, so much the better!’

  ‘Yes, if she could, but Mrs Scorrier would never permit herself to be worsted by Nurse! And if Nurse becomes outrageous, only think how difficult it would be for us!’

  ‘Do you mean to tell that woman the dogs shall be kept on chains?’ he demanded, a still angrier flush staining his cheeks. ‘I give you fair warning, Venetia, that if you do that I’ll shut Flurry into her bedchamber, with her best bonnet to worry!’

  ‘Oh, love, don’t tempt me!’ she said mischievously. ‘Of course I don’t mean to do any such thing! But I think it no more than just to promise her that you’ll bring the dogs only into this room. It is nonsensical of Charlotte to be so much afraid of them, but – oh, Aubrey, we must remember that it is now her house, and not ours!’

  ‘Remember it! When are we allowed to forget it?’ he flung at her.

  She said nothing, but turned to the door. Damerel moved to open it for her, and said, as she paused for a moment, looking up at him in silent enquiry: ‘Decisive, I think! I shall see you tomorrow, but not, I fear, before noon. I was going to tell you – but it’s no matter! My agent is at the Priory: I’ve been closeted with him most of the day, and I fancy shall be so again all the morning. It’s important, or I’d let him go hang
. As it is –’ he paused, and smiled faintly, ‘– as it is, I must bear with him. Don’t let that woman vex you to death!’

  She shook her head, his smile reflected in her eyes, and hurried away, across the ante-room.

  He shut the door, and turned, meditatively surveying Aubrey, who had gone over to the fire, and was savagely stirring the logs to a blaze. He did not look up from this task, but as though aware that he was being studied said pugnaciously: ‘It was no fault of mine!’

  ‘Well, don’t start ripping up at me!’ replied Damerel. ‘I haven’t said it was. Stop putting yourself into a passion for nothing more than a storm in a teacup!’ Aubrey looked at him, his mouth hard shut, and two deep clefts between his brows. ‘Gudgeon!’ Damerel said, friendly mockery in his eyes.

  Aubrey gave a short laugh. ‘I’d give a monkey to be present when she tells Conway she won’t have his dogs in the house! As for Charlotte, she’d do well to accustom herself to them, for she ain’t likely ever to see him without at least three at his heels. What’s more, Conway’s dogs are the worst trained in the country, and infernal nuisances! He lets ’em jump on the chairs, and gives ’em scraps of meat at table. I don’t make fools of my dogs! Oh, hell and the devil confound him, beef-witted Jack Pudding that he is!’

  ‘Come back to the Priory, and we’ll confound him in unison!’ invited Damerel. ‘I have some worse epithets for him under my tongue!’

  Aubrey grinned, but shook his head. ‘No, I’m not so paltry! I wish to God I were back at the Priory, but I’ve told you already I won’t rub off.’

  ‘Well, I never try conclusions with mules, so I’ll rub off myself,’ Damerel said, shrugging, and picking up his hat and his whip from the chair on which he had laid them. ‘Hasta mañana, you resty pup!’

  Aubrey glanced quickly at him, seemed to hesitate, and then said: ‘Are you out with me? I didn’t mean –’

  ‘No, I’m not out with you, chucklehead!’ Damerel answered, laughing at him. ‘Stand buff, if you feel you must – I daresay I should do the same in your shoes.’