She arched her professionally shaped eyebrows, and wiggled her fingers in the general direction of the house. “You own all this? Is your new name Michael Rourke?”
“You know it’s not. He’s up at the house.” Anxiety twisted in his lap. The woman had torn him up and then thrown him away. His heart might never mend. Had she come all that way to completely annihilate him? Take away any chances with his uncle? “What are you doing here, Lisa?” Exasperated, he tried his best to pretend like he didn’t care, but it wasn’t easy to hide when his underarms suddenly flooded and he repeatedly clenched and unclenched his fists.
Before she could answer, Michael opened the front door and called out. “Hello, Ms. Trinkett. Thanks for coming. She’s up here.”
She? What was Michael talking about? Who? What the hell was going on?
Lisa held up a finger to Michael. “Thanks, just a second please. I’m just saying hi to an old friend.” She winked at Johnny, sending electric bolts of anger to places where she used to make him tingle.
“I’m here as a physical therapist. Some girl is in pretty bad shape. So they called me.” She pointed toward a large silver truck with some kind of logo splashed across the side in green paint.
“That takes schooling, Lisa. When have you had time?” Admittedly, he didn’t know a lot about her. That’d been one of the problems while they’d dated. She’d been too secretive. He’d been played like a game of badminton.
She flashed sparkling teeth like a pageant girl, taunting him in his ignorance. “While I was competing for the pageant, I was also going to school. In fact the scholarship for second place helped me finish my degree. I’ve been working as a traveling therapist since last summer.” Glancing over her shoulder, she turned back to Johnny. “I need to get going. Nice seeing you again.”
And she disappeared, like she’d never been in his arms, or ever promised him her tomorrows then stolen them out from under him, taking his along with them.
Like she’d never sued him for sexual harassment and gotten him fired because of it.
Sara Beth
Chapter 11
The box had become somewhat of a joke between Sara Beth and Rosie since their apartment in Colby.
Sara Beth kept five sheets of paper with grainy black and white pictures and typeset information about five women born to the same man.
The only two that shared the same mother were Rosie and Sara Beth.
Oh, Mom. Sara Beth missed her mother, whose memory was often triggered by little things Rosie did – like stir pancake mix by rolling the bowl to its side or licking her finger just before flipping the page of a book. Every once in a great while Sara Beth would catch a glimpse of her mother in the mirror, but that hadn’t happened in a long time.
She focused on the contents of the box staring forlornly up at her. Shifting in her wheelchair on the deck, Sara Beth began her daily ritual with a touch more melancholy.
Ugh, anytime she thought of her mom and all the time she and Rosie had lost with the wonderful woman, Sara Beth slipped into a gloomy mood. The sadness over her lost dreams and irritability with Johnny combined, pushing Sara Beth close to full blown depression.
Johnny hadn’t even ridden by. Sara Beth knew because she hadn’t left her spot except to go to bed late at night.
Something had changed between them, but she couldn’t put her finger on what exactly it was.
She needed to focus on something besides memories and men. Picking up the pages of her and Rosie, she set them aside out of the way. Then Sara Beth carefully bent the edges of the next one – she’d organized them according to birth order.
Her dreams of chasing down each sister, walking up to them wherever they would be and hugging them while they all gushed over finding each other, washed away with each day that passed and she couldn’t feel her legs.
Rosie didn’t show any interest in finding them. She claimed she was too busy and who wanted to drum up old feelings about Caracus and his gang?
But then Ronan James would call and suggest they stay at the ranch on a random day, and Rosie would watch the road particularly close. And no one would ever tell “little” Sara Beth what the heck was going on.
The young girl in the picture had distinct features, even though the disguise of grainy pixels hid more than many photos might. Sara Beth could almost imagine her voice and closed her eyes.
“This is Sara Beth.” Michael’s low tone wasn’t what she’d expected when she pictured her half-sister’s speaking.
“It’s nice to meet you, Sara Beth. I’m Lisa Trinkett.” That was more like it. And she said her name exactly like Sara Beth thought it was pronounced – with an -ee sound instead of a soft i like Lissa or a hard i like Liza.
Michael touched Sara Beth’s shoulder. Her eyes flew open. She shoved her picture back into the box and jerked her face toward him and his guest.
The girl from the photo smiled politely at Sara Beth. And even though her hair was longer and this girl obviously had had braces since the teenage picture had been taken, there was no denying the beauty beside Sara Beth was most definitely one of the sisters she wasn’t able to chase after on her worthless legs.
Stuffing the pages into the box and then replacing the lid with a thud, Sara Beth tried studying Lisa at the awkward angle. “Uh. Yeah. Hi. Hello.” Sara Beth offered her hand and Lisa shook it with a friendly giggle.
Michael indicated a deck chair for Lisa. “Go ahead and take a seat. You probably won’t be leaving here much at first.” To Sara Beth, he added. “Lisa’s your new physical therapist. She comes highly recommended from the Circuit and might be just what you need.” He smiled tightly, like he hoped something or someone would help with Sara Beth’s permanent attitude problem.
Sara Beth would love the same thing. To be “fixed” but how did one fix a broken person’s spirit when her back wasn’t strong enough to take the trials?
“You’re very pretty. I bet you’re not wearing any makeup, are you?” Lisa moved to the rail, holding onto the post and staring out at the mountains growing from the fields. “It’s this air. I swear it’s magic. People don’t age normal here. You know?”
“Thank you.” Sara Beth wanted to reach out and touch the long brown strands of hair barely wafting with the breeze. Always burdened with curly, unruly hair, Sara Beth wanted to spend so much time playing with Lisa’s straight hair. Almost as if it demanded her attention. “I’m sorry, this is really rude, but is your hair as soft as it looks?”
Lisa laughed. She bent to the side, swinging her hair so it fell in a straight curtain. “Go ahead. You’re not the first one, girl.” She peeked from behind the dark mass, her blue eyes almost identical in shade to Rosie’s and Sara Beth’s. “Just between you and me, it’s my pride and joy.” She winked.
So far, Sara Beth really liked her new-sister and physical therapist.
SARA BETH COULDN’T stop staring. Lisa had a great personality, a bit dry at times, but wow she could laugh. When she walked away at the end of the appointment, Sara Beth had been tempted to call out and confess everything, but she needed to talk to Rosie first. Figure out how to proceed.
Wheeling through the front door, Sara Beth called out for her sister. “Rosie? Where are you?”
“In the kitchen. Do you need help?” Rosie poked her head into the long wide hallway.
“No. You’re never going to believe who I just met.” Sara Beth tucked the box tightly between her side and the raised side of the seat.
“Was it the new therapist? Michael said she was coming today. Is she nice?” Rosie walked toward Sara Beth, craning her neck to catch a glimpse of the departing truck. “Did she try carrying you to the barn?” She laughed, poking Sara Beth’s shoulder.
“No. The therapist? Was Lisa.” Sara Beth waited for Rosie to catch up, but her sister just stared at her with a pleasantly expectant smile like she waited for the punch line to a joke that didn’t make sense.
Quietly, Sara Beth opened the box and pulled out the sheet of paper with L
isa’s information on it. “The only thing that is different is the last name. On here it’s Caracus, but in person, she introduced herself as Trinkett.”
Slowly, Rosie claimed the paper but didn’t shift her gaze from Sara Beth’s face. “What do you mean she’s your therapist? How did she find us?”
“I don’t think she did. She didn’t seem to recognize anything about me. She asked a bunch of questions about my body – what I’ve noticed, blah, blah, blah. Nothing about family background or anything like that. It was crazy. I can’t believe she was here.” Sara Beth wheeled her chair to the window as if she might catch one more glimpse of the woman. She hadn’t been so upbeat in a while.
“Did you say anything to her?” Rosie thrust the paper back to Sara Beth after joining her at the window.
“No, of course not. I wouldn’t know where to start. It’s not like I can just say, ‘hey, Lisa, nice to meet you. I’m your sister. Our dad was a bad guy, you know killing and raping and so on, and because of him the FBI is looking for all of us. Want to hide out in my fort?” Sara Beth whistled slightly in amusement. “Not a lot I could do with that surprise dropped in my lap.”
“Don’t say anything to her until I figure this out with Michael. This affects all of us now.” She patted Sara Beth’s shoulder. “Thanks for telling me. I’ll make sure I’m around to meet her next time she comes. I know this means a lot to you.”
But obviously not much to Rosie. That fact bothered Sara Beth and she could only watch as Rosie walked away.
Sara Beth’s excitement waned. She’d hoped for more of a reaction from Rosie. The anti-climactic response left Sara Beth feeling dissatisfied with her telling. She wanted to talk to Johnny. If nothing else, he’d at least pursue where her thoughts would go. He seemed to thrive on pushing her and seeing where she was coming from.
But he hadn’t been around and now Sara Beth didn’t have a friend to talk to.
Even if the dynamics of their relationship had changed, Sara Beth knew he still cared – at least enough to be there to vent to.
She’d figure out a way to find him and talk to him.
Even if he was at the barn.
Johnny
Chapter 12
Every day Lisa came to visit Sara Beth pain twisted in Johnny’s gut like a long two-pronged fork. And every time she left, the fork unwound enough he could breathe. He didn’t trust her with Sara Beth – didn’t trust that that she wouldn’t poison his friend against him.
Lisa’s truck disappeared from the end of the driveway and Johnny watched the house. Large windows reflected the blue cloudless sky with a blankness that matched his recent days.
At what point did he approach Sara Beth and tell her about Lisa? Would she believe him? Would she care? Had he imagined everything that he’d felt? He couldn’t have imagined that she’d responded to him as well, could he? Look at how wrong he’d been with Lisa.
He dusted his gloves off and tucked them in the back pocket of his jeans. Time he talked to Sara Beth – about more than her new physical therapist but also about what they meant to each other.
Trudging to the steps, Johnny sighed. When was the last time he’d had to talk to a girl about how he felt? With Lisa. And the outcome had been traumatic. Hopefully this time things would be drastically different. Lisa had been manipulative and deceitful where Sara Beth didn’t know the first thing about guile.
A squeak at the top of the stairs grabbed his attention and Johnny looked up.
Sara Beth, hands on the wheels to her chair, waited for him, brow furrowed. “I was just trying to figure out a way down these to come talk to you.”
“Well, I’m here. Let’s talk.” He didn’t mean to sound so coarse, but the last thing he needed was to be slapped down again. He climbed the steps and followed alongside her as they returned to her normal spot at the south end of the house.
The cream of her skin clashed with the black wheels as she rolled them. The strength required to push her weight forward took a lot. He pointed toward the rims. “You’re getting the hang of that. Good job.”
“Thanks.” But she kept her eyes downcast and didn’t say anything more.
Johnny claimed the seat that had been positioned beside Sara Beth’s spot. He angled it to face her and he sat. With hands folded in his lap, he catalogued the depths of gold in her curls, the length of her dark lashes, and the startling clarity of the blue in her eyes. Not for the first time did he wonder at how he’d missed what she was when he’d just started getting to know her.
She was what guys on the Circuit would call a real catch – the real thing. Not some girl that paraded around trying to be perfect, but the girl that fought against all odds and still emerged victorious.
Sara Beth matched his patience and intertwined her fingers between her knees, watching him but not speaking.
Johnny looked around. Maybe he didn’t need to talk about feelings or anything right then. Maybe he’d just address Lisa. “So, how are things going with your new therapist?”
“I like her. She’s really nice.” She glanced at her fingers and then met his gaze straight on. “Why haven’t you come to visit me in a while? Are you mad at me?” Without hesitation, her tone sliced through his denial.
Forced to face his behavior head-on, he thrust his jaw to the side. Reaching forward, he pulled her hand into his before he realized what he was doing. He jerked back. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Why? Why shouldn’t you have done that? What is so wrong with you touching me?” She bit her lip, tears filling her eyes. “Am I that abhorrent that you can’t have feelings for me?”
Pain chopped at his resolve to remain indifferent. “What? Is that what you think this is? That I don’t have feelings for you?” He stood, pushing his hat halfway up his forehead before resettling it where it belonged. Then, still not satisfied with its position, he yanked the felt hat from his head and slammed it onto the railing. “Dammit, Sara Beth. I have confusing feelings about you.”
Her tears spilled, streaking down her clean cheeks. No makeup. The girl was devoid of pretense. “What does that mean?”
He shook his head. The last thing he wanted to talk about was his emotions. “Look at you. You don’t even know how to hide how you feel. You’re so open about who you are. Do you have any idea who Lisa is? Who she isn’t? Look at what happened with Lou. Are you positive she’s not like him?” Crossing his arms, Johnny hoped he didn’t have to share what he’d done, been accused of, and then ultimately punished for.
His innocence wouldn’t hold any weight, even here.
“I don’t know. There’s so much I don’t know. Look at you, I didn’t know anything about you but you’re still here – even though you’re pulling away.” Sara Beth bit her lip and nodded. “You’re right. I don’t know much about Lisa, but I need to give myself a chance to try.” She narrowed her eyes. “Why are you so worried about her? I didn’t get anything from you on the last guy. But with a girl?” Then her eyes widened. “Wait, you don’t have a child with Lisa, do you?” Her horror at that possibility couldn’t have been more evident.
They studied each other in silence, as if a challenging riddle had been thrown down and the first one to answer won.
Very quietly, Sara Beth whispered. “You like her, don’t you? Is that why? Well, you’re welcome to pursue that. She’s here strictly on a business platform, but once she’s finished, you have my blessing to pursue her. It’s not like I’m going to ever walk again, anyway.” She scornfully laughed, pointing at her jeans. “Maybe that’s why you’ve been avoiding me, huh? We had whatever that was – a moment, or something – and you can’t have that with a cripple, right?” Face tight, Sara Beth stared him down.
“Stop.” Johnny stepped closer, until his jeans rubbed against her legs. “I don’t want her. I mean...” He waved his hand and sat again. “Look, here’s the story. You remember I mentioned a ‘Lisa’ and how destructive our relationship had been? Well, that’s Lisa. That’s her.
”
Sara Beth’s mouth fell into the perfect O. She shook her head, eyelids fluttering. “What do you mean her? That’s not possible. You can’t have dated her. Did you sleep with her?”
Johnny jerked back like he’d been slapped. “I don’t think that’s really appropriate for us to discuss. I’d rather not talk about that time of my life. Especially with you.”
“Especially with me?” She held up her hand. “No, you pulled us down this rabbit hole, you’re going to finish the journey. I thought you said full disclosure at the hospital.” She sighed and leaned her head back to rest on the high leather seat. “What else did you leave out? Are you someone’s baby daddy? I’m serious, did you two...” She lifted her eyebrows.
“No. Listen, I didn’t leave anything out.” Everything was going too fast and she wasn’t listening to what he was saying, just putting her own meaning behind everything. “You’re taking it out of context. She and I dated, but I was more into her than she was into me. I... well, after I told her I thought I might...” He swallowed, twisting his fingers between his knees. “Well, love her, she laughed at me. She said she didn’t believe in love and that I didn’t have anything she wanted except the title for Miss Wrangler Montana.”
There he’d said it. Gotten it out. Oh, wait... there was that last little bit... He lowered his voice to a near-whisper. “And then when I told her I didn’t have any say in who competed or won, she went to my uncle and said I’d sexually harassed her, said I’d made promises of winning and touring with the Circuit, but only if she’d go out with me and... well, you get the picture.” He kicked his feet together, leaning back, and staring off into the distance.
He couldn’t stop the tidal wave of explanation as it poured from his mouth. “My uncle kicked me out of the house. Told me to disappear until he got everything cleared up and then I can return. The problem is I don’t know if I want back on the Circuit. I mean, I did for a while, but there are so many problems and more drama than I ever thought possible. I have to wear a suit and...” He stopped talking, just stared at the swaying stalks of grain. While the release could have passed as a cleansing, it also could’ve ruined so much with Sara Beth. But at least he’d been honest.
Riding for Redemption Page 7
