The Shatterproof Magician (The Inscrutable Paris Beaufont Book 4)

by Sarah Noffke

  “They did it because of who you both are,” Paris cut in. “I want to hear all of your stories, but Aunt Sophia, Uncle John, Uncle Clark, Rudolf, and Rory have all told me about you two. You were beyond loved…you are beyond loved.”

  Liv looked on the verge of tears once more. She shook her head, recovering. “I’m sorry for any precious brain cells that the king of the fae has made you lose. I’m guessing he hasn’t changed in the last fifteen years.”

  “He was giving a tour of Roya Lane earlier when I arrived,” Paris offered.

  “Oh?” Stefan asked.

  “Yeah, he was telling anyone who would listen that Abby Lincoln signed the Gettysburg Address on a park bench on Roya Lane.”

  The three laughed easily.

  “Yes, Ru hasn’t and hopefully won’t ever change,” Liv said fondly. “He might have the IQ of a set of sticky notes, but he’s also just as helpful. If you ever need something, he will drop everything and risk his life for you.”

  Paris nodded. “I’ve sensed that. You two have some amazing friends.”

  Her mother smiled at her father. “We do. I can’t wait to get back up to that world of the living.” She pointed at the ceiling where many stories up, Roya Lane buzzed with life.

  Stefan nodded. “First, we have to recuperate fully. That’s the deal we made with Papa Creola. Then we can assimilate back into the real world.”

  “And kick some ass,” Liv said with a wide grin.

  Returning the expression, Stefan said. “Absolutely. I’m guessing the demon population is sorely out of control with me gone.”

  “Well, you know the best way to get back to normal?” Liv turned for the table at their backs.

  “How?” Paris and her father asked together.

  Liv spread her arms wide, and a feast with tons of Mexican food options magically appeared on the table. She glanced over her shoulder at her family. “The way to recover is nachos, of course.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Paris was extremely full. Not only her belly, which required that she unfasten the first button of her pants, but also her heart.

  For hours, she and her parents dined on chicken taquitos, carne asada tacos, cheese quesadillas, roasted salsas, and of course, nachos piled high with all the trimmings. She wasn’t sure why she’d ever been nervous but was relieved that they had been too. Among the three of them, the conversation flowed easier than the margaritas.

  Apparently, Papa Creola had encouraged her parents to drink up, saying they had to refill their reserves and tequila was good for that. Not only that, but the alcohol would loosen them up and allow their bodies to assimilate to the time change.

  Paris and her parents laughed until they had tears in their eyes again, but for different reasons. They exchanged stories, her parents from before she was born or when she was little. Paris told them about growing up with Uncle John and how he was always full of love and thoughtfulness.

  The reunion didn’t meet Paris’ expectations. It far exceeded them. She would never have imagined in a million years that there would be two people that she loved so completely. As soon as she returned to Happily Ever After College, she automatically missed her mom and dad. However, Papa Creola had all but kicked her out, saying that they needed their rest and she did too.

  The father of time thrust the large river rocks into her hands, saying they were part of the puzzle related to time travel. Then he ushered her up the stairs to make the trek to the top of the Fantastical Armory. Paris blew a kiss to her parents with a promise to return soon.

  Presently, she stood in front of the fairy godmother mansion with so many good wholesome feelings billowing out of her. She glanced down at the pile of rocks in her hands, realizing that the fun was over and the next adventure was starting. These were pieces to the Faraday puzzle, and she had no idea how to put them together. Starting for the mansion cloaked in the darkness of the night, she hoped that the squirrel did.

  The fairy godmother estate was quiet when Paris made her way up to her room. She was grateful for that since she didn’t want to explain why her arms were full of polished river rocks. Her brain was also full of all the various things she and her parents had discussed.

  When asked about what Plato said about her familiar also fulfilling a deal, Liv explained that it was much like the situation with Paris and Faraday. Liv’s parents—Guinevere and Theodore Beaufont—had known Plato and asked him to watch after Liv if anything ever happened to them. Something did, so he did. However, when his service to Liv was up he had realized that the deal had helped him to meet his best friend.

  Fondly, Paris’ mom explained that Plato had never left her side since he showed up many years ago. Secretly, Paris hoped that Faraday had formed that kind of bond with her, but she couldn’t shake the nagging thought that he was simply doing all this out of obligation.

  She sighed, turning the corner on the second story to her room. It all didn’t matter. If she did her job, Faraday would be changed back to whatever he was and returned to his timeline. That was probably for the best, but she had to admit, she’d miss the strange squirrel.

  Paris fumbled with the door handle given her full arms but managed to get it open finally. Faraday was sitting in his usual place in her half-open sock drawer. His eyes darted to the rocks and widened suddenly.

  “What are those?” He scurried out of the drawer and onto the top of the dresser, where Paris relieved her burden.

  She stood back and looked at the rocks, which were quite similar. “Puzzle pieces. Do you have any idea how to put them together?”

  He leaned over to study, sniff, and scratch them. “No, but they aren’t normal. There’s something unique about them.”

  “I’d say.” Paris plopped down on her bed. “They were given to me by Papa Creola.”

  “Oh?” His gaze slid to the side.

  “Yeah, this is part of the puzzle that will put you back on your timeline.” Something caught in her throat.

  His tail flicked. “So you know that much.”

  “Yes, and I know that you can’t tell me anything until I go into the Bewilder Forest and find the last two puzzle pieces. Plato told me that much.”

  Faraday sighed. “Oh, good. So you talked to the lynx.”

  “Yeah, about that…” Paris measured him up, studying the squirrel. “I was a deal, huh?”

  “It’s not like that,” he replied.

  “Plato came to you, stuck in squirrel form and in the wrong timeline, and told you to accompany me and help me until I recovered my parents, and in return, he’d help you with what you need? Is that correct?”

  “Well, when you put it that way, it’s kind of how it happened,” he answered. “But there was more to it than that.”

  “Like what?” Paris challenged.

  “Well, I wanted to come to Happily Ever After College and help you,” Faraday replied. “It was a noble mission, and I got to learn about things of interest to me.”

  “Now that you’ve fulfilled your end of the bargain, Plato says that he’s put everything in motion to hold up his end of the deal,” Paris offered.

  The squirrel glanced down at the wood grain of the dresser, apparently studying the pattern. “That’s incredible. I didn’t think it was possible, but if anyone could pull it off, it’s him.”

  Paris motioned to the river rocks sitting next to Faraday. “Papa Creola gave those to me. They’re other parts of this weird puzzle. Apparently, that’s what we need to put you back on your timeline.”

  He glanced at the rocks and nodded, not looking particularly excited. “That computes.”

  “Does it?” Paris questioned. “How do some shiny rocks help you to time travel to whenever you’re from?”

  “It’s complicated,” he answered simply.

  She nodded, having expected this answer. “So you can’t tell me what time you’re from, can you?”

  He opened his mouth as if he was going to say something, then shook his head. “It appears I can’t.�
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  Paris threw herself back on the bed. “Yeah, Plato said you couldn’t tell me everything until I retrieved the last two puzzle pieces. At least Papa Creola gave me these for the time travel business.”

  “So you’re going to help me?” Faraday asked tentatively.

  She bolted upright, surprised. “Of course.”

  “Even though I wasn’t completely honest with you from the beginning?”

  Paris thought about this for a moment. “Honestly, it doesn’t sound like you could. You never lied to me, right?”

  Immediately, he shook his head. “Everything I told you about my family and my desire for knowledge and being spelled was true.”

  “It sounds like your agreement forced you to leave out some details,” she reasoned. “Albeit what seems like the pertinent, juicy details.”

  He nodded. “But I didn’t lie to you.”

  “Well, and you risked your life to help me face the Deathly Shadow, which I couldn’t have done without you.”

  “That’s true,” Faraday chirped, perking up.

  “Still, I haven’t forgotten that you got me in a fair amount of trouble with the Serenity Garden business and trespassing into the Bewilder Forest at night.”

  His cheerfulness receded once more as he hung his head. “Curiosity has always been my downfall.”

  Paris nodded. “I have a feeling that I’m going to learn how it’s the culprit to you being a time-traveling, talking squirrel.”

  He simply returned the nod.

  “Speaking of going into the Bewilder Forest at night, you know where I have to go to find the other two pieces of the puzzle?”

  His large brown eyes widened. “That will be dangerous. I’ll go with you.”

  “You better.” She grinned and laid back on the bed once more. “I hope the puzzle pieces aren’t river rocks. Otherwise, you might have to get used to that body and this timeline.”

  “I’m prepared to do that.” His voice turned melancholy.

  Feeling bad for him, Paris reassured him, “Don’t worry. I won’t stop until I help you. We’ll get you back to whatever and wherever you came from.”

  “Thanks, Paris. You’re a true friend.”

  She laughed. “Even if circumstance originally forced you to be that.”

  He flicked his tail. “I was asked to help you. I’m the one who decided to be your friend.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  “Doing this research without a computer is tough.” Christine lounged on the straight-back tufted sofa in the front sitting room of the mansion. Casanova, the fluffy orange oversized cat, was sitting on her lap. Paris knew he was a tattle cat, but she didn’t see that as much of a problem since they were working on a mission for the headmistress—although it was on the down-low.

  Paris was pacing in front of the large window that overlooked the Enchanted Grounds. She pointed at Wilfred Biltmore—the AI magitech butler for Happily Ever After College—standing at attention beside the sofa. “He’s a computer.”

  Christine sighed while petting the cat. “I can’t type on him. Well, I could, but I don’t think he’d like it.”

  “I would prefer that you did not,” Wilfred said in his posh, English accent, his hands pressed behind his back at waist height.

  “You have a preference,” Paris sang, wagging her finger at the butler.

  “I’m not sure what you’re getting at, Miss Beaufont.”

  “Well, if you can prefer things, you can be amused by them,” she stated while continuing to pace.

  “Are you trying to get the AI to laugh?” Christine appeared entertained.

  “It’s a worthy cause,” Paris said. “I have to figure out what material does it for him. So far, it’s not knock-knock or blonde jokes.”

  Christine shook her head. “If he laughed at those, I’d be worried there was something wrong with his programming.”

  “I don’t know,” Paris retorted. “A dragon told me a few really funny knock-knock jokes recently.”

  Throwing her arms out dramatically, Christine sighed. “Oh my gosh. You hang out with Father Time and dragons and get to have cool fiestas with your long-lost parents. Why is it that the coolest thing about my parents is that my dad won at enchanted bingo at the Magic Disco recently on Roya Lane?”

  “That’s pretty cool,” Paris marveled.

  “Yeah, it would have been, but you know what the prize was? Birkenstocks! My dad won a pair of Birkenstock sandals. Do you know who needs to wear Birkenstock sandals? If you answered no one, ever, you are correct. But my dad is going to wear them and worse….” She covered Casanova’s ears and whispered, “With socks. Birkenstocks with socks…”

  Paris laughed and shook her head at her friend. “Anyway, I think Wilfred is the perfect computer because he’s much more than that.”

  “By more, do you mean that I’m a multifaceted piece of magitech engineered to serve, inform, and also teach?” Wilfred asked.

  Paris shook her head. “No. I mean that you have multiple functionalities that you don’t know how to use unless guided. So, my point is that you have untapped potential.”

  “I don’t know if that is accurate,” Wilfred answered dryly.

  Christine sighed and sat up on the couch. Casanova took the spot next to her. “Will, you were able to hack into news sources and plant bogus articles to pit McGregor Technologies and Rose Industries against each other.”

  He cleared his throat. “I wasn’t aware that was something within my capabilities until Miss Beaufont informed me of such.”

  “So, untapped potential.” Paris looked at Christine. “What do we have him do so we can research this social media scandal with FriendNet?”

  “Well, it’s believed that the social media source is causing breakup, lowering the love meter,” Christine mused. “So, Will, can you run a search on couples who have recently unfriended each other on FriendNet?”

  “Running report now,” Wilfred stated, his eyes glazing over momentarily. “I have results of one hundred and twelve thousand couples who have severed ties on FriendNet—”

  Christine gasped. “Wow, that’s a lot—”

  “In the last twenty-four hours,” Wilfred added.

  Paris whipped around to face Christine directly. “In the last twenty-four hours. That has to be a lot more than the average.”

  “Wilfred, can you tell us how many couples unfriended each other, let’s say, last month?” Christine asked.

  Again, the AI butler’s eyes glassed over before he straightened once more. “In total last month, there were one hundred and sixty thousand couples who severed ties on FriendNet.”

  “Whoa!” Paris exclaimed. “So in twenty-four hours, there were roughly as many breakups as in a month. How many for this week in total?”

  “There were approximately seven hundred thousand and thirty breakups on FriendNet in the last seven days,” Wilfred answered.

  Paris continued her pacing. “That’s a significant increase.”

  “At that rate, no one will be together in a month,” Christine stated.

  “Well, I’m no mathematician, but there’s roughly three billion of the world’s population on FriendNet, so I don’t think it will be that extreme,” Paris explained. “However, your point remains. We could see the love meter go into the negative if this continues.”

  “The fact that you said you’re not a mathematician and threw out the statistics on FriendNet is pretty entertaining,” Christine teased.

  “Touché,” Paris replied. “Still, I think we’ve determined that the rise in breakups isn’t a fluke. Something is the cause of it.”

  “That’s what we have to figure out next.” Christine pushed up to her feet.

  “Got any ideas?” Paris asked.

  Christine nodded victoriously. “Yeah, I’m going to go get on my FriendNet account and hit up all my ex-boyfriends. The best way to get information is to use your resources. They are all stupidly in relationships, or they were, so I’ll find out if they�
��re one of the statistics. Then we’ll go from there. I suggest you do the same thing. Do some investigating, and we’ll reconvene.”

  Paris nodded victoriously, grateful that she’d enlisted her friend on this mission. Christine was savvy and clever, and hopefully, together they could fix what was destroying relationships on social media. If they couldn’t, love was at stake worldwide.

  Chapter Twenty

  The Enchanted Grounds felt different at night. The temperature was always the same, but the glow from the fairy godmother mansion on the lawn created an eerie quality that wasn’t present during the day.

  The foreboding feeling on the Enchanted Grounds probably had a lot to do with the looming Bewilder Forest and the fact that Paris knew what was in there.

  “Are you sure it has to be at night?” Hemingway asked at her side.

  “It’s what the lynx said.” Paris turned to face the dark, haunted forest.

  “Is it worth pointing out that you’re taking instructions from a talking cat?” Hemingway joked.

  “I’m not sure what the issue is there,” Faraday said from the grass on the other side of Paris.

  “Right.” Hemingway drew out the word. “I’m obviously the weird one since I don’t know any talking animals who send me on dangerous quests.”

  “That’s very peculiar,” Faraday teased.

  “I can loan you one,” Paris offered, nodding in Faraday’s direction.

  Hemingway had agreed to accompany her into the Bewilder Forest since it had to be at night, and he was the only one who could control the ghost of his dead mother—of course, Paris hoped that he could. She listened to him the last time, but she was a deranged ghost who killed herself and haunted the forest at night.

  “So let me get this straight,” Hemingway began, looking out at the forest, the same as the other two. “You have to go into the Bewilder Forest at night to find a puzzle piece, but you don’t know what you’re looking for. That’s so you can fix the talking squirrel, which I’ll remind you, I warned you shouldn’t be talking at all.”