High Priestess

by Wendy Hewlett

  “Hold on a moment. I’ve never heard about a trust fund until today.”

  Kiara stared at Raven wide-eyed. “I don’t understand. Adara Kirby set that up for you on your eighteenth birthday. She brought us your account information and we’ve been making the deposits to your account every month.”

  “I think I’m going to need you to give me this account information because I’ve never seen a dime. If I had been told about a trust fund when I was eighteen, I would have told Ena to keep her friggin’ money. And while we’re at it. I don’t want her house either. You can give that to Kiran.”

  “No, I’m sorry, I can’t. It has been decreed down the generations that the house, the land, and the money be passed from mother to daughter. It’s yours, Raven. Until you pass it on to your daughter.”

  As if she was going to have a daughter. If she had her way, she’d be spending the rest of her life with Riley, so she didn’t think either one of them would be getting knocked up any time soon.

  Oh, sweetheart. You already are.

  Jesus. What the hell was she talking about now?

  You were with Jaxon, Rave.

  Raven shot to her feet, knocking her chair backwards. She quickly picked it up and pushed it back into the table. “I-I need to go.” She fumbled with the heavy door and bumped into the door jamb as she tried to pass through. Her chest burned as she cleared the reception area and made it out to the fresh air. She bent over, tried to breathe, and slid her hand under her shirt, over her belly. When was it she slept with Jaxon? Four or five weeks ago? When was her last time of the month? Oh, shit. She sat on the sidewalk and bent over with her head between her knees.

  “Raven?” Kiran called out as he rushed to her side. “What it is, love? Is it the trust fund?”

  “No. Christ, no. I don’t give a shit about the damn trust fund.” If she was pregnant, that would explain all of these emotions she was struggling with, wouldn’t it? She wasn’t losing it. She was just pregnant. Just pregnant? Holy, shit. “I need to go t-to the drug store.”

  Kiran refused to let Raven drive, so they walked the two blocks to the pharmacy. He refused to wait outside, too. Much to Raven’s horror, he followed her down the aisles as she tried to find the pregnancy tests.

  “Will you tell me what’s going on, love? You’re as white as chalk.”

  How did she explain everything? She turned to him and raked her hand through her hair. “It’s Ena. This is going to sound crazy, but she’s been talking to me since she passed.” She expected him to look at her like she was a complete idiot, but his face lit up. He flashed a brilliant white smile and his eyes, icy blue flames framed in dark lashes, sparkled.

  “You can communicate with her? Oh, blessed be. Can you tell her I love her? I miss her so much.” His smile faded and he pressed his thumb and forefinger to his eyes. “Oh, dear God. I’m sorry.”

  Tell Kiran I’m here. I’m right here.

  “She said to tell you she’s right here.” Okay, this was just too weird. She wasn’t going to act as some sort of liaison between her parents. God only knew what they’d want to say to each other. Ick.

  “Oh, babe. I’m sorry I wasted so much of our time being away at sea. I thought we had a lifetime still ahead of us. I thought I would retire in a few years and we would spend the rest of our days together. I’m so sorry, darling.”

  “Can I just remind you that we’re standing in the middle of a store.” So not doing this. Why did they have to wait for this moment to confess their love for each other for God’s sake?

  Kiran ran his hand through his hair and looked at Raven with a pained expression. “She wasn’t the only one who made mistakes, who has regrets, aye? I’m sorry, love. I didn’t mean to embarrass you.”

  She was about to get a lot more embarrassed. The pregnancy tests were sitting on the shelf right behind him. “She’s not there all the time. She just pops in and out. Anyway, while we were at the lawyer’s, she said something. That’s what upset me.”

  “What did she say, love?”

  She thought about telling him not to call her that. Again. But, it was becoming kind of endearing. It made her feel all warm inside. Her hand went to her belly, rested there for a moment, and she pointed to the shelf behind him.

  “I need one of those.”

  Kiran turned around and looked at the shelf then took a big step back. “Oh. Alright then. Do you mean to tell me I’m going to be a grandfather?” He looked at Raven with his eyes wide, his face a little pale.

  “That’s what I need the test for.”

  “But, I thought …” He blew out a short laugh. “I’m sorry, love. I thought you were gay. Yesterday … Riley. Well, she said you just broke up.”

  “Yeah. We did.” This was not a conversation she wanted to have with Kiran.

  “So, you’re bi-sexual?”

  “Can we just buy the damn test and get out of here.” She grabbed at the first one in her reach and stomped off to the cashier.

  Kiran chased her down the aisle. “I’m sorry, love. This isn’t the time or the place for that conversation. I’m just a little … well, I’m not very good at being a father yet, am I?”

  Raven whirled on him, stopping him in his tracks with her icy glare. “I’m twenty-seven freaking years old. I’ve lived my entire life without a father. What the hell makes you think I need one now?” She regretted her words the moment they were out of her mouth. He looked at her as if she’d just sucker punched him.

  “Oh, aye. I understand.”

  He walked to the exit and pushed the door so hard it bounced back and nearly took him out.

  Shouldn’t have done that. She pushed Ena out of her life and now she was doing it with him. She looked down at the box in her hand and wondered if she’d do it with her kid, too. Would she suck at being a mother? The last thing she wanted was to have a kid and make her feel like she didn’t matter.

  She made her way to the cashier, relieved when she didn’t know the woman at the till and there was no line up. She placed the box on the counter and fished a twenty dollar bill out of her front pocket. The woman smiled at the box then up at Raven.

  “Your first?”

  Raven nodded. Her first what? Pregnancy test? Because if she knew if she was having a baby, she wouldn’t need the damn test. She thanked her lucky stars when the woman rang her up without another word. Raven took her change, swiped the bag off the counter, and high tailed it out of there. She half expected to find Kiran sitting in Ena’s car in the lawyer’s parking lot, but he’d gone. She was just about to get in her car when she heard her name and turned to see Kiara running toward her in her spiked heels.

  “You left without your documents,” she said as she handed Raven the manila envelope.

  Raven stared at it, but made no attempt to take it from Kiara.

  “I’ve included the banking information for your trust fund.”

  Raven continued to stare at the envelope. Accepting it didn’t mean she was accepting the house and the money. She needed to find out where the trust fund money had been going, but she could do that and not bother with the rest of the contents of the envelope. She reached out and took it from Kiara’s hand. “Thanks.”

  Kiara didn’t let go of the envelope. “Take some time to read through it, Raven. Do that for yourself if not for her.” She released her hold when Raven nodded.

  Raven got in the car and started it up. She was already backing up as she fumbled with her seat belt. She’d go home, pee on the stupid stick and then go to the bank to find out what happened to the mysterious trust money. Once she knew what the deal was there, she could go and visit Adara and get to the bottom of everything.

  She was pulling onto her road before she knew it and it struck her that she couldn’t remember most of the drive home because she’d been so involved in her thoughts. If she was pregnant, did she stand a chance with Riley? Jaxon would probably go ballistic and want to marry her. Jesus. This mess would destroy Jaxon and make Riley alienate her
even more than she already was.

  Half way down her road, she spotted a satellite truck, then another. Slowing to a stop, she stared out in disbelief. Cars and vans with the logos of every TV and radio news station in the Province lined the road. Her cottage was surrounded by reporters, videographers, and photographers. She reversed down the road until she found a spot where she could turn around then sped off in the opposite direction. Who the heck would have given them her address?

  She drove back towards town wondering where she could go to pee on the stick. Riley’s was out. Jaxon’s was even less appealing than Riley’s. She didn’t want to go to Adara’s until she found out what the bank had to say. If Ena, who’d been Adara’s best friend, considered Adara a suspect, then Raven had to do so also, even if it went against everything she knew about Adara.

  Raven pulled into the Solstice Café’s parking lot and parked the car then took out her cell phone. She still had it on silent mode. On the bottom left corner of her screen, the phone icon showed a red number in the top right corner displaying 112 missed calls plus voicemail. Her voicemail would only hold three messages, so anyone else trying to leave a message would get a recording telling them the mailbox was full. For that reason, she didn’t check the messages. She scrolled through the list of phone numbers. Most were numbers she didn’t recognize. She figured the media not only discovered her home address, but her cell phone number as well. But, how?

  The numbers she did recognize were calls from Adara, Jaxon, Grayson, and Mick. None from Riley. That figured, didn’t it? The one person you do want to call, doesn’t. She called Mick and when she picked up, she didn’t give Mick the opportunity to speak.

  “Where are you?”

  “Um…at work.”

  “Can you go home? I mean …” Crap. “Can I meet you at your place? I just need a few minutes.”

  “Raven? What’s going on?”

  Raven closed her eyes, drew in a deep breath and released it, trying to calm her fluttering heart. “My place is surrounded by reporters. I need to borrow your washroom for a few minutes.”

  “The media has kind of descended upon Solstice. There’s a mob of them at the detachment, too. When I leave here, they’re liable to follow me, Raven. They know we worked on the Paigo case together.”

  “Okay. Never mind.” She disconnected the call and stuffed her phone back in her pocket. Then she sat there staring at the building through her windshield. Was she really considering doing a pregnancy test in the café washroom? Yes, damn it. She was dying for a pee. She scanned the parking lot for a vehicle with a news station logo on it. Nothing. Stuffing the pharmacy bag inside her jacket, she dashed to the ladies room and locked herself into one of the two stalls.

  Reading the directions on the box took seconds. Raven ripped the box open and followed the directions word for word. And then she waited. She didn’t want to look at the stick, so she set an alarm on her phone to time the five minutes it was supposed to take the stick to register a result with either a plus sign or a minus sign. It was, without a doubt, the longest five minutes of her life. What the hell was she going to do if it turned out positive? She wasn’t ready to be a mother, especially not a single mother. How was she supposed to raise a baby with her career? She could get called out at any time of the day or night.

  Then there was the issue of carrying a kid around in her belly for nine months, getting bigger and bigger until she couldn’t move and her ankles swelled up beyond recognition. Was she allowed to work out if she was preggers? Run? Could she drink coffee? “Oh, damn. Please be negative.”

  The alarm sounded on her phone and as she turned it off she wished it hadn’t sounded so soon. She wasn’t ready to look at the damn stick. Her heart beat a battle of tribal drums against her chest. She placed her hands on either side of the stall and lowered her forehead to the door, the cool metal soothing her burning skin. Breathe. She should have gone to Riley’s. If she passed out, she’d land on the dirty washroom floor. Not that it looked filthy or anything, but who wanted to lie on the floor of a public washroom? Worse yet, what if she landed on the toilet. Ew.

  She knew she was stalling, being a weak idiot. Time to put on her big girl pants and get it over with. What’s the worst that could happen? Oh, yeah. She could be pregnant and alone. She forced herself to turn and look at the stick sitting on the box on top of the toilet paper dispenser. The little window displayed a clear, blue plus sign.

  It could be wrong, couldn’t it? Maybe she should get another test to make sure. Or … shit. She’d known it in her gut, haha, before she even took the test. As soon as Ena said it, she knew there was a little life inside her. That’s why she’d panicked.

  What the hell was she going to do?

  One step at a time, darling angel. The first thing you need to do is find Jaxon and tell him. I robbed you of the chance to know your father and I robbed Kiran of the joy of seeing you growing up. Don’t do that to your child.

  As much as she didn’t want Ena’s advice at the moment, she was right. It was Jaxon’s child, too and he had the right to know. She put the stick in the bag, stuffed the box into the garbage and washed her hands, careful not to get the bandage on her left hand wet. It wasn’t an easy task. Neither was trying to rub her right hand and her left fingers dry under the blower.

  She went to the counter to buy a coffee then couldn’t decide what to order. She couldn’t have caffeine, could she? She stared up at the drink menu. If she ordered a decaf, the staff would get suspicious. They knew exactly what she ordered every time she came in or went through the drive thru – large, double double. Raven stepped up to the counter and Irene had already rung her coffee into the till.

  “Can I get a chocolate milk instead? I feel like something cold.” There. That wasn’t suspicious. She had a perfectly good reason for ordering a chocolate milk.

  “Oh, sure.” Irene deleted the coffee and rang in a chocolate milk. “I think this is the first time in the five years I’ve worked here that you haven’t ordered a large, double double, Raven.”

  Raven stabbed her fingers through her hair, leaving a large tuft sticking up and leaning to the left. “I’ve already had my quota for the day. I’m on a new fitness regime.” She handed Irene a five, accepted the change and stuffed it in the front pocket of her jeans.

  “Looks like it’s one hell of a regime. You’re pretty banged up.” She pointed to Raven’s face. “I heard you’ve had a rough week. We saw you on the news last night, honey.”

  Great. “Yeah, it’s been a rough one.” She picked up her chocolate milk and fled.

  In her car, she locked the doors and pulled out her phone. She had double as many text messages as she had missed calls. Jaxon had sent her nearly twenty text messages since the previous afternoon. Most of them said, “Answer your damn phone” or “Call me”. With her stomach churning, she sent him a text. ‘Are you at work? We need to talk.’ Then she waited, staring at her phone.

  Her body jolted when the phone began buzzing in her hand. The display showed an incoming call from Jaxon. She answered, “Hey.”

  “Finally. I’ve been trying to get hold of you since yesterday. Are you okay?”

  Those emotions she was having a terrible time avoiding soared up through her chest, clogged in her throat and made her eyes water. “Yeah, but I really need to speak with you. In person.”

  “Rave? You don’t sound so good, babe.”

  Her entire body began to shake. She pursed her lips and squeezed her eyes shut, pushing everything down.

  “Rave?”

  “I’m here.” She told herself to breathe, but she was afraid if she let her breath go, everything she was trying to hold back would tumble out.

  “Where’s here? I’m coming to get you.”

  “No, not here. Can I meet you at your house?”

  “You’re scaring me, Rave. What’s going on?”

  “I’ll meet you at your place.” She hung up, lowered her head to the steering wheel and released her br
eath with a great whoosh.

  CHAPTER 11

  JAXON WAS ALREADY parked in his driveway when Raven pulled in behind him. She slid into the passenger side of his truck, the pharmacy bag crinkling in her trembling hand.

  He examined the abrasions and bruises on her face with lips pursed to a fine white line. “You okay?”

  “Yeah.” She didn’t like the sound of her own voice. It was more of an exhale than a word that rushed out of her lungs. Then she shook her head and said, “No. No, I’m not.” She handed him the bag, the plastic shaking furiously as her stomach did cartwheels and a few back hand springs.

  Jaxon took the bag from her, pursed lips turning into a frown. “You’re scaring me, Rave. What’s this?”

  He opened the bag and stared into it for a few moments. She knew exactly when it clicked what he was looking at. His eyes went from narrowed to bulging and his mouth dropped open. Raven dropped her head into her hand.

  “You can’t mean your pregnant?”

  Raven spared him a quick glance. His eyes were still bulged out, but there was something else there. Anger? His face had become flushed and there was a thick, ropey vein bulging in his neck.

  “That’s what the stick says.”

  Jaxon closed the bag and dropped it in her lap. “So, why are you showing it to me? We used protection, Rave.”

  Her mouth dropped open. Was he saying it couldn’t have been him; insinuating she’d slept with another man? She snatched up the bag, opened the door, and slid down to the driveway.

  “Fuck you,” she said before she slammed the door. She would figure this out on her own. She didn’t need a damn man to accuse her of being a slut.

  Jaxon shot out of the truck and rounded the back before she had a chance to get in her car. Grabbing her by the shoulders, he glared into her eyes.

  “Don’t you dare drop this on me and take off. You don’t get to do this to me.”

  Raven brought her hands up in front of her, shot her forearms out to the side and then down to dislodge his hands from her shoulders. Her blood was running hot through her veins, her heart beating too fast, pounding in her ears. She darted around him and threw herself into her car, locking the doors as soon as she slammed it shut. She wanted to punch him, claw him bloody. The last thing she expected was for him to suggest it wasn’t his baby. She didn’t know what reaction she had expected from him, but it certainly wasn’t that.