A Father's Promise
Page 17
When he pulled his truck into her drive less than an hour after they’d left the restaurant, he killed the engine before helping Laurel out of the vehicle.
“Thanks.” This time, she promptly let go of his hand and started toward the porch.
“Y’all are back early.” Rae was sitting on the living room floor, playing with a pajama-clad Sarah-Jane. “I wasn’t expecting you for another couple of hours.”
Moving around the sofa, Laurel smiled at the two of them. The first smile Wes had seen since her father called. “That would explain why someone is up past her bedtime.”
“We’ve been having a great time.” Rae looked up at them. “We ate macaroni and cheese, we sang, we danced. ‘Baby Shark’ makes for a very good workout, you know.”
“I can imagine,” said Laurel. “Except now it’s going to be stuck in your head for who knows how long.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right.” Rae stood as Sarah-Jane spotted Wes.
The child pushed to her feet and toddled toward him as fast as her wobbly legs would allow. And Wes’s heart swelled faster than the Grinch’s when he discovered the true meaning of Christmas.
He scooped his daughter into his arms and inhaled the sweet smell of baby shampoo. That was one of many simple pleasures he was going to miss when he left. Stepping over toys, he carried her to the glider near the fireplace and sat down while Laurel and Rae resumed their discussion of the events at Irma’s this morning.
Once he set the chair into motion, Sarah-Jane didn’t seem to mind. Instead of trying to get down, she yawned and snuggled against him.
“Wes doesn’t even live here—” his sister shot him a glance “—and I’ve already had people inquiring about how long he’s going to be in town because they’ve got projects they’d like him to tackle.”
“How would they even know?” He eyed Rae.
“Small town,” said Laurel. “Word gets around fast, and reputations are everything.”
“In that case, Rae, you can tell them I’m scheduling for next summer.”
“Well, considering that Mason Krebbs is about their only option, I could probably have you booked up in no time.”
“It’s definitely something I’ll keep in mind.” Though it wouldn’t be service oriented, like he preferred. But he could talk to the pastor about the organization he’d mentioned.
Laurel looked at Wes with a half smile, half pout. “Looks like someone was more tuckered out than she thought.”
He lowered his gaze to see a sleeping Sarah-Jane.
“I can take her.” Laurel started toward him.
“That’s okay.” He snuggled his daughter closer. “I’d like to hold her awhile longer.”
“I have a feeling I’ll conk out pretty quick once I get still, too.” Rae retrieved her purse from the counter. “You two enjoy the rest of your evening.” She hugged Laurel before leaving.
After closing the door, Laurel crossed the room to come alongside Wes. She stroked Sarah-Jane’s head. “So precious.”
He couldn’t stop looking at his daughter. “Yes, she is. Leaving her is going to be the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” Turning his attention to Laurel, he added, “It’s tearing me up just thinking about it.”
“I guess we’ll have to get those video chats going as soon as we can.”
“I’m not very computer savvy, so I might need a tutorial.”
“It’s not that bad. We’ll go over things tomorrow.” Her focus returned to Sarah-Jane. “I should probably put her in bed now.”
“Would you mind if I did it?”
She blinked twice. “No, not at all.”
Standing along with him, Laurel remained in the living room while he carried his daughter down the hall to her room.
Before laying her in her crib, he placed his mouth near her ear and whispered, “I love you, Sarah-Jane. Don’t you ever doubt that.” He kissed her soft cheek. “Sleep well, sweetheart.”
As he laid her down, he marveled at the way she rolled onto her side, her hands coming together as though she were praying.
His eyes burned. God, You’ve granted me such precious gifts in Laurel and Sarah-Jane. And now I have to walk away. I know it’s temporary, but I’m going to need Your help to get me through this next year.
Moving into the hall, he pulled the door to before returning to the main part of the house, where he saw Laurel in the kitchen, cradling a mug of something steamy. She looked as though she’d been crying. Was she still upset about that phone call from her father? Or was it something more?
“She’s out like a light,” he said as he entered the room.
“I’m sure Rae wore her out.” She set her cup on the counter. “Are you going to head out?”
Approaching the kitchen, his heart tightened. Did she want him to go? “I was hoping to spend a little more time with you.”
After a deep breath, she nodded. “I fixed myself some herbal tea. Can I get you something?”
Yeah, the Laurel he’d had a wonderful time with at the restaurant. “No, I’m good.” Or more like disappointed. Nervous.
With the peninsula between them, he said, “About your father.”
Her sad eyes met his.
“Saying goodbye to you was as tough on him as it was on you.”
She clasped her mug so tightly, her knuckles were white. “How do you know that?”
“Did you not see the pain in his eyes? But he has a business to run. Things happen. I’m sure he’ll be back just as soon as he can.”
She removed the tea bag from the steaming cup and tossed it into the trash. “You’re probably right.” Whisking past him, she moved to the table and pulled out a chair.
Not exactly what he’d had in mind. The sofa was definitely cozier, but he could let it go for now.
“Did you hear what Irma said today? About hiring me—us—to redo the rest of her house.” A nervous chuckle escaped her pretty lips.
“She also said that we should consider starting a business.” He watched Laurel, hoping his next statement would help him get a better read on her. “What would you think about that?”
“I think that would be impossible since you’re going to Iraq.” Cradling her mug, she took a sip.
“What about when I get back?”
She set her cup on the table. “Does that mean you’re planning to come back to Bliss?”
He wanted to think he saw a glimmer of hope in her eyes. “Absolutely. Sarah-Jane is my daughter, and I plan to be a father to her. The only way I can truly do that is to be here for her.”
Laurel gave a curt nod. “She’ll like that.”
“It’s more than just that, though.”
“Oh?”
“Laurel, spending time with you these past few weeks, seeing how well we work together... What I’m trying to say is that I care about you. You’re important to me. And I was hoping that, maybe when I get back, we could talk about giving our daughter the kind of family she deserves. You know, a mother and a father. Together.”
Her eyes searched his for the longest time until he finally said, “Tell me what you’re thinking, Laurel.”
Standing, she crossed to the kitchen. “I’m sorry, Wes. Sarah-Jane and I are not some sort of package deal where you can get two for the price of one. Yes, I want Sarah-Jane to have an ongoing relationship with you. But you and me?” She wagged a finger between them. “That’s not going to happen.”
Wes felt as though he’d been punched in the gut. Staring blankly at the table, he wasn’t sure what to say or do. Should he stay and try to plead his case? Or should he just leave?
“I think you should go,” Laurel said, giving him the answer he hadn’t wanted or even expected.
Just a couple of hours ago, things were going so well. Laurel had been in his arms and seemingly wanted to be there. Now...
/> Was it the phone call from her father that had shifted things? Had she convinced herself that Wes wasn’t coming back, even though he’d told her he was?
Shoving his chair away from the table, he stood, his heart aching as much as it had when he’d learned of his parents’ deaths. He paused in front of her on his way to the door. “Good night, Laurel.”
She looked away, and Wes found himself wondering what he was going to do now.
* * *
Laurel woke up on the couch the next morning, feeling as though her eyes were filled with grit. From the monitor on the side table behind her, she could hear her daughter happily jabbering—the same way she’d heard Wes telling Sarah-Jane that he loved her.
If only he loved Laurel, too, last night could have turned out so much different. Instead, Wes had just assumed that since he was Sarah-Jane’s father, Laurel would automatically agree to marry him.
The thought made her heart ache anew. Wes might care about her, but she wasn’t important enough to love.
“Mah!” Sarah-Jane’s voice grew louder, and Laurel smiled.
There was one person who loved her, though. One precious little girl that Laurel wouldn’t trade for the world.
Still wearing her dress from last night, she stood and stretched before continuing down the hall to Sarah-Jane’s room. “Good morning, sunshine.”
Sarah-Jane’s smile was big as she bounced up and down, holding on to the side of the crib.
“Looks like you’ve got plenty of energy today.” Too bad Laurel couldn’t say the same. She’d spent much of the night either crying or chastising herself for doing so until she finally fell asleep in the living room. Even now it frustrated her. Wes was not worth losing sleep over. Yet no matter how many times she told herself that, things kept shooting through her head, reminding her to the contrary.
After changing Sarah-Jane’s diaper, Laurel set her daughter on the floor and followed her down the hall. Her walking was getting better, and she was finally reaching the point where she preferred walking over crawling.
About the time they made it to the kitchen, there was a knock at the door, and Laurel’s whole being tensed. What if it was Wes? This was his last day in Bliss, after all, and he’d said he wanted to spend the day with Sarah-Jane. Okay, so he’d included Laurel in that, too, but now she knew she was nothing but extra baggage.
She sucked in a breath and moved to the door, praying her eyes weren’t too puffy. The last thing she wanted was for Wes to think she’d been crying over him. Even if it was the truth.
When she opened the door, though, it wasn’t Wes standing there, but her father.
Feeling more than a little befuddled, she said, “What—? I thought—”
“Soon as I hung up with you, I realized that if I waited until everything was under control, I might never make it back here. Laurel, you’re more important to me than any ol’ business. So I left instructions with my crew, hopped in my truck and drove until I got to Bliss.”
She simply stood there with her mouth hanging open. “But what about your heart? Don’t you know you need your rest?”
“I called the Bliss Inn on my way out of Midland so they’d have a room waiting for me when I got in.”
“Which was?”
“Somewhere around two. So yes, I got some sleep. But I couldn’t wait to see you.”
Tears filled Laurel’s eyes, spilling onto her cheeks.
“Oh, Laurel.” He stepped inside, the aromas of coffee and soap enveloping her right along with his arms.
For the first time in her life—that she could remember, anyway—she hugged him back with all of her might. These past few weeks had been such an emotional roller coaster, and now everything had finally caught up to her, including one freshly broken heart. “God must have known I needed a daddy today.” The words were muffled against his chest.
Just then, she felt Sarah-Jane at her leg. She pulled away to see unshed tears in her father’s eyes, too.
She picked up her daughter. “Do you remember your pawpaw?”
Sarah-Jane laid her head against Laurel’s shoulder.
Jimmy smoothed a hand across her back. “That’s all right. We’ll have time to get to know each other.” His eyes moved to Laurel. “Now what did you mean when you said you needed a daddy?”
Her bottom lip pooched out as fresh tears welled. “I’ll tell you over coffee.”
A short time later, she and her father sat across from each other at the table, each nursing a cup of fresh brew, while Sarah-Jane nibbled on a banana in her high chair. And Laurel opened up about last night.
“We went on a date, and it was probably the best time I’ve had since...well, since the last time Wes and I went out.” Even Wes’s kiss had held such promise. “Then when he was putting Sarah-Jane to bed, I heard him on the monitor, telling her how much he loved her.”
“Is that a bad thing?”
“No. But he doesn’t love me.”
Her father winced. “He said that?”
“His exact words were that he cares about me and I’m important to him. Then he went on to suggest that when he gets back next year, he and I should ‘talk about giving our daughter the kind of family she deserves.’ With ‘a mother and a father.’ As if that was the only reason we should be together.”
“So you think he’s considering a loveless marriage for the sake of Sarah-Jane?”
“That’s what it sounded like to me. I mean, there was no mention of love or wanting to be with me. Only Sarah-Jane.”
“Laurel, have you told Wes how you feel about him?”
“I told him I cared about him.”
“I’d venture to say you’re in love with him.”
Her shoulders sagged. “I am. But I’m not going to tell him that. If he told me first, that would be one thing, but—”
“Have you stopped to think that maybe he’s just as afraid to tell you as you are to tell him?”
“Whose side are you on?”
“Yours. Always. That’s why I don’t want you to throw away something precious the way I did. I didn’t come back for you because I was afraid your mother had found someone else and would send me packing. It wasn’t until I had nothing to lose that I finally found you, and things turned out better than I ever imagined.” He stared into his now empty cup. “Laurel, I’d hate to see you let fear keep you from your dreams, especially since I’m fairly certain Wes loves you, too.”
Tilting her head left and right, trying to work the kinks out of her neck, she said, “It’s Sarah-Jane he loves. Not me.”
“Are you sure? Or are you just afraid to find out? I’ve seen the way he looks at you, the way he protected you when I showed up.” Her father eyed her across the table. “It’s not all about Sarah-Jane. It’s about you.”
I’ve never forgotten you, Laurel. Wes had said that the day he asked her about Sarah-Jane’s name. Could it be true? Could she have lingered in Wes’s mind the way he had hers?
“Let me give you something else to think about.”
She looked at her father. “What’s that?”
“Do you want Wes to leave thinking that you don’t love him?”
“No.” She tried to focus on her daughter so she wouldn’t cry. “But I’m scared.”
“Can’t be any worse than what happened last night.”
The man had a point.
God, it is so not like me to do something like that. Should I?
“I’d be happy to watch my granddaughter if you’d like to pay him a visit.”
It sounded like she had her answer.
A giddy, nauseous feeling began to swell in her belly. “Okay, I’ll do it.”
After scrubbing her face, pulling her hair into a ponytail and donning some yoga pants and a cute tunic, she thanked her father and headed to Rae’s.
Just about
every parking spot was taken as people filed in for a leisurely Saturday breakfast, but she managed to snag the last one. Then, with a fortifying breath, she willed herself through the doors of the Fresh Start Café and marched straight to the back and the stairs that led to Rae’s apartment.
“Laurel?”
She turned at the sound of Rae’s voice.
Coffeepot in hand, her friend continued toward her. “What’s up?”
“I need to talk to Wes.”
Rae’s expression went blank. “I guess you haven’t talked to him.”
“Not since last night.”
“He left for North Carolina before sunup. He’s gone, Laurel.”
Chapter Eighteen
Wes walked across the parking lot of the Servant’s Heart headquarters Monday morning, feeling as though he’d had the life sucked out of him. While the eighteen-hour drive had been uneventful, he was a mess. His insides hadn’t been this knotted up in years. While leaving Sarah-Jane had been challenging enough, hearing Laurel say there was no future for them had cut him to the quick. What had changed her mind? Or had he read her wrong all along?
For the thousandth time, he thought about their kiss. From where he stood, she’d been all in on it...until her phone rang, anyway. Could that have had something to do with her pushing him away? Her conversation with Jimmy had definitely dampened her mood. Could that call have caused her feelings of rejection to resurface?
Except Wes hadn’t rejected her. He’d told her that he cared about her and that he wanted them to be together. The only thing he hadn’t done was tell her he loved her. Yet instead of going back and confessing his true feelings, he’d hightailed it out of Bliss early the next morning without so much as a goodbye to Laurel or Sarah-Jane. A fact that had him kicking himself halfway across the country. Would it have made a difference, though?
He dragged a hand through his hair. It wasn’t like he was adept at understanding women. So when one finally broke through the wall he’d built and actually captured his heart, it figured that he’d blow it.