Sugar Rush

by Belle Aurora

  “Why are you single?”

  It takes me a moment to answer, because regardless of how many times I’ve justified staying out of a relationship, putting it into words is always harder. “When I love someone, I love them with everything I have inside of me. And when I love someone, I put their needs above my own.” I look at the road ahead. My chest pangs as I explain, “I can’t afford to do that. I worked so hard to get here, James. I remember while all my friends were going out, I was home studying my ass off. While my sisters were celebrating the end of the year with drinks and clubs, I was home studying my ass off. When people were meeting the people they would spend the rest of their lives with, I was home studying my ass off.” I take in a deep breath and add on an exhale, “I won’t give up what I’m doing, not for anyone. That’s why I’m single.”

  “Sounds like a lonely life,” he mutters sadly.

  Leaning my head against the window, I whisper, “It is, James. It really is.”

  We drive on in silence, and I’m thankful for it.

  ***

  Max

  “What’s going on with you and Helena?” Ash asks as he walks into the chill out room.

  I tilt my head and think about this for a moment before I state with a nod, “I like her.”

  Ash pulls out a chair and turns it around before sitting on it and rolling his eyes. “You like yogurt. You don’t like Helena.”

  I look down at my now-empty container of yogurt on the table. I smile in agreement. “I do like yogurt.”

  “He does,” Trick cuts in from reading the paper on the sofa. I turn to find him smiling up at Ash like a fool. “He likes yogurt.”

  My body shakes in silent laughter. Ash shakes his head in frustration. “Whatever.” He looks me in the eye. “Stay away from her.”

  I lift my hands in the air. “I can’t do that, Ghost.”

  His jaw tics. “What do you mean, you can’t? You can, and you will, if you like your teeth.”

  Standing, I pick up my empty container and dump it in the trash. “Seriously, dude, I can’t. She’s agreed to doing private sessions with Ceecee.” I shrug. “No can do.”

  His eyes turn deadly. “Keep your hands off of her.”

  I tilt my head and think about this a moment before answering, “No.”

  I walk out the door as he calls out in disbelief, “What did you say?”

  Smirking, and knowing it’s killing him inside, I call back, “I said no.” I walk down to my office, chuckling all the way.

  Suck on them apples, Asher.

  ***

  Helena

  “So when I told him we wouldn’t be having relations anymore until he left his wife, he got all kinds of pissed with me. What? Like I’m the asshole, because I want to be some guy’s everything? Puh-leeze,” mutters Felicity.

  Holy shitballs, this girl is my hero. She knows what she wants, and she makes no excuses about what she’s got to do to get it. Her life is a D-grade soap opera. Mouth gaping, I nudge her hand. “Then what happened?”

  Her eyes round comically. She blinks prettily. “Somehow, his wife found about his sleazy ways. She got photos in the mail. Anonymously, of course.” She closely examines her nails, then murmurs, “I mean, the tall blonde just happened to be blurred out, but she got the picture loud and clear. Pun intended.” She winks. “His orgasm face is so ugly he couldn’t be confused for anyone else.”

  A choked sound escapes me. Laughter bubbles up my throat ‘til it bursts out of me, loud and uninhibited. Patrons of the café turn around to stare at me, and normally, I’d care, but this is just too funny for me to give half a damn. Wiping at stray tears that roll down my cheeks, I tell Felicity, “You’re amazing, you know that? And to think I thought you were some du—”

  Warning! Warning! Foot meeting mouth at rapid speed!

  Felicity narrows her eyes at me. “Some what?”

  Uh oh. I have no doubt in my mind that Felicity could beat the ever-loving crap out of me if she needed to. But she is my friend, and friends tell each other the truth. Wincing, I mumble, “Might’ve thought you were a bit of a bimbo. Sorry, babe.”

  Tipping her head back, she laughs at my obvious discomfort. “Oh man, the look on your face. I know what I look like, Lena,” she thickens her New York accent dramatically, flicks her bleached-blonde hair, and puts on her best duck-face impression, “but I’m glad ya realized I ain’t got shit for brains.”

  Smiling, I tell her honestly, “You’re one of the most kickass women I know, Flick.”

  She bunches her nose. “Nawww, I love you too…cupcake.”

  My body stills as my eyes widen. Leaning over to her, I hiss, “Where did you hear that?”

  She grins. “I might’ve heard Max say it to you.” My head lands on the table with a thud and she chuckles. “Why does he call you that anyways?”

  I lift my head from the table and mumble, “He says I smell like cupcakes.”

  Her face softens. She lifts a hand to her chest and sighs. “Wow. That is so adorably Max.”

  I mutter a disgruntled, “I know.”

  She grins. “I gotta tell ya; I tried to catch that man.” My eyes widen. Really? She shakes her head sadly. “He did not want to be caught. Such a shame.”

  I blink at her shoulder and murmur, “Oh yeah, such a shame.”

  She lifts her glass and sips at her ice water. “So how long you been crushing on him?”

  Lifting my own glass to my lips, I pause midway. “What?”

  “Max,” she prompts, “how long you been gaga for him?”

  I could lie. I could tell her I don’t like him. That I never noticed his strong jaw and golden eyes, or his magic dimple. But I cave. Sipping my iced tea, I confess, “For forever. The first time I met him at Tina’s wedding, I thought I’d died and gone to heaven.” A soft sigh escapes me. “We were introduced and I stuck out my hand.” A small smile tips my lips. “He looked down at my outstretched hand and shoved it aside. He swept me up in a bear hug and swung me from side to side. I remember breathing in his scent. It wasn’t even cologne. It was just him. When he set me down, he kissed my cheek and told me I looked beautiful.”

  I breathe, “I honestly thought I had fallen in love. I thought I had met the man of my dreams.” I straighten as my smile falls. “But then I saw him do the same thing when he met my older sister, Nina, and it didn’t feel so special anymore. Plus, I threw myself at him at Nat’s wedding.” I smile sadly and shrug. “He didn’t even look up from his phone. He dismissed me, and to top it off, he called me Helen.”

  Felicity winces. “Ouch.”

  I use my straw to mix my drink. “He didn’t even see me.”

  “Well, then,” a slow smile spreads across Felicity’s face, “we’ll just have to open his eyes.”

  Say what now?

  “Oh no. Whatever you’re thinking, you can just stop it, girl. Max and I will never be a thing. I’m good with that. I’ve come to terms with it. Don’t you be getting involved. We don’t need interference, thank you very much.” I end on a regal nod.

  But her smile turns into a grin. “Who said anything about interfering? I was thinking more of showing him what’s been in his face the entire time.”

  I grunt and roll my eyes. “He doesn’t care. That’s the point. He doesn’t want me, Flick.”

  Her smile doesn’t falter as she utters, “We’ll see about that.”

  If the sinking feeling in my gut is anything to go by, I’m in serious trouble.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Helena

  “Okay,” I huff and puff alongside Ceecee, “tug-of-war is a hardcore workout.” Wiping sweat from my brow, I mutter, “We’ll only do it every now and again.”

  Ceecee slumps in her chair, equally as sweaty as I am. “I thought you said we were doing light sessions?”

  I place my fingers on my pulse to measure out my heart rate and pant, “This was light.”

  She mock-sobs. “I feel like I’m dying.”

 
How adorable is this child? A laugh is forced from my throat as I throw her a towel and hand her a bottle of water. “You know why it feels like you’re dying, young grasshopper?”

  Opening her water, she mumbles an annoyed, “Why?”

  Needing to make a point, I kneel in front of her, hold out my hands, and near-yell, “Because you stopped exercising!” As she pouts, I explain, “Your body is in shock right now, because you haven’t done this for months. Do you remember how you used to feel after you exercised? I’ll bet you barely broke a sweat.”

  Looking at my face, she eyes my sweatiness and retorts, “Oh yeah? What’s your excuse?”

  Secretly loving the smartass side of her, I don’t skip a beat. “A love of cupcakes and a sofa that is way too comfy for my own good.” Standing, I smile down at her and hold out my hand. She slaps her hand over mine in a weak high-five and I gloat, “I’m proud of you. You pushed yourself today. I saw it. I felt it. You’re ready to get back into this.” As we walk side-by-side, I warn her, “Just so you know, you’re going to be sore tomorrow.” She groans, but I speak over her, “Which is why we’re doing another session tomorrow. Lighter than today, but we have to push past that barrier.” She looks up at me like I have to be joking, but I shake my head. “Sorry, angel face. You can give me those pretty eyes as much as you like, but this is happening. We made a deal.”

  She wheels herself along and mutters under her breath, “Is it too late to take it back?”

  Smiling, I wrap an arm around her shoulders and pull her close. “Sure is, honey pie. We’re in this for the long haul.”

  I am.

  I definitely am.

  ***

  Helena

  I knew I was in trouble the second Felicity invited herself over to my place to get ready for our Saturday night out. So when she showed up with a suitcase, I probably shouldn’t have been surprised.

  I mean, I was. But I shouldn’t have been.

  With Tedwood attacking my ankle, I held the door open for her. As she made her way in, she looked around my apartment and whistled long and low. “Shit. You’ve been holding out on me, girl. I didn’t know you had money.”

  Looking around my apartment in confusion, I asked, “I’m broke as a joke. Why the heck would you think I’ve got money?”

  Eyes narrowed, she asked, “How’d you get this place?”

  “My sister and her husband own the building.”

  An ah-now-I-get-it expression hits her face. Eyeing my bookcase, she asked cautiously, “How much are you paying rent?”

  I shrugged. “A thousand a month.”

  She gasped. “Seriously?” I could only stare blankly at her. She shook her head in disbelief and uttered, “You have no idea how much rent is in this city, do you, cupcake?”

  My throat thickened. Oh no. What had Nat and Ash done now? No louder than a whisper, I asked, wide-eyed, “How much?”

  Her lip tilted up in the corner as she thought about it. “For a decent place like this, I’d say between two and a half to three grand a month. Maybe even more with the tight security.”

  No shit.

  I whispered, “No shit.”

  She nudged my shoulder with her arm and smiled down at me. “You’re lucky to have a family who loves you so much.”

  Still shaken by the onslaught of information, I muttered to nobody in particular, “I’m beginning to see that.”

  Nat had called me in emotional hysterics the day she and Ash had accidentally slept in, not being able to take me to work. The devious part of my mind told me to milk it for all it was worth, to lay on a guilt trip so thick that Nat would forever do what I asked. But then I realized that not only during my time here had she been wonderful, supportive, and loving, but that she and Ash had undergone serious changes in their lives without complaint. I soon remembered I would forever be in their debt for making my transition to New York as painless as it could be.

  Also, I loved them.

  James had happily accepted the duty of taking me to work and home again, if it wasn’t too weird for me—his words. I was totally okay with this. Not only did it mean my sister and her husband would be able to sleep in, taking some of my guilt away, but I would be able to spend a little time with James, one-on-one. Nat wasn’t too sure about that. I argued I needed to make friends here. She returned that the only friend I needed was her. The turd. To my utter shock, it was Ash who had talked Nat into letting this happen. He told Nat it was natural to feel protective of me, but James seemed like ‘an okay guy’.

  I could’ve kissed him then.

  Okay, okay. I did kiss him. A big fat smooch he had no chance in hell of escaping, right on the lips. He screwed up his face and cringed. I winked and blew him another kiss. He rolled his eyes at me, but I felt the love. So I guess it shouldn’t have shocked me that Ash would give me a bogus rent figure. But I was kind of pissed about it. More sore about it than pissed, I guess.

  Covering my face with my hands, I groaned out loud. “Oh God, is that what I am? The poor sister? Ugh. That sucks assholes.”

  Felicity just laughed. “Don’t sweat it. I’m sure they’re going to ask you to babysit when they have kids, and they’ll do it knowing you can’t say no.”

  I sobered in an instant. “Wow, do you know my sister? Because I think you spiritually channeled her there for a second.” Staring down at her offending suitcase, I ask carefully, “So, what you got in there? A severed head?”

  Smiling like the Cheshire cat, she simply raised her brows, knelt down, and unzipped the bag. She peeled back the lid to unveil a portable salon. “I told you we’d make Max see you, didn’t I? I’m making good on that.”

  Already shaking my head, I objected. Strongly. “No, no, no, no, no, no. N-O. No.”

  Felicity smiled at me. Her bazillion dollar grin. And a smiling Felicity was something to be reckoned with. She was so damn pretty I felt I would change teams for her. “Listen, I’m not asking you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with, just to let me do your makeup and dress you tonight, is all. How bad could that be? You won’t even have to pick your underwear. I’ll make it easy for you.”

  I could see there was no fighting this. She had that look in her eyes. I let out a long, agonizing breath. “No short skirts. No short shorts. Nothing that’ll show my legs.”

  A confused look crossed her face. She looked down at my uncovered legs and bunched her nose. “Why the hell not? You’ve got killer legs. I mean, they’re not tall, but they’re shapely and firm.” She reached down to pinch the skin of my thigh, unable to get a grip. “They’re tight, bitch. What gives?”

  How to explain without sounding nuts? “Okay. This was the way it worked back home. Nina showed leg. Nat showed leg and boob. I, however, only showed a bit of cleavage. I never really liked my legs, but I like my rack. Not wanting to show too much, I always chose to expose rack, rather than leg. Capisce?”

  She looked at me dumbfounded for half a minute before gaping. “You’re dumb as shit, baby. You’re lucky you’re cute to boot.” With that sentence, she showed me why I liked her. She reminded me of the relationship I have with my sisters. I loved that.

  Saying that, we barely agreed on clothing. We almost got into fisticuffs over it. Finally, I decided on a multicolored green leaf-print chiffon number. The dress was long, but draped and sheer, requiring a miniskirt underneath, and showing a healthy amount of boobage. After having tried it on and examining it under every possible light source, I deemed it okay. When I gave in, Felicity almost collapsed with gratitude. “Thank fuck for that! Moving on!”

  She spent a good part of the next hour doing my hair and makeup, lightly curling my dark hair, leaving it in long tresses down my back, and making my eyes dark-rimmed and smoky.

  I had to admit…I liked the way she did it. It looked hot, and that’s not a word I would use to describe myself.

  We argued again over shoes. I didn’t like heels, never did. I liked strappy sandals or low-heeled wedges. This was simply a comfort
thing. I tried on eight pairs of shoes before Felicity let me off wearing nude strappy sandals. Thank the Lord. With myself done, Felicity got to work on herself. If I hadn’t have seen it myself, I wouldn’t have believed it. She managed to get herself looking supermodel-runway-ready in forty minutes. And I secretly hated her for it.

  She decided on a white button-up dress. Who knew she could make something so wholesome look so sexy. Undoing the top three buttons to let her black bra show, she wrapped a black belt tightly around her waist and slid on a pair of black strappy sandals. Looking down at her shoes, I scowled at her.

  She rolled her eyes. “Oh, please. If you were as tall as I am, you’d get it. Try meeting a guy looking like an Amazon. Guys don’t like chicks being taller than them. Sad, but true.” Running her fingers through her hair, she put on a ton of mascara and glossed her lips, then folded up the short sleeves of her dress and turned to me, grinning from ear to ear. “We look good, baby, but I swear to God if Max doesn’t notice you tonight, looking the way you do, I’ll buy you a dozen of those cupcakes you like in consolation.”

  Already salivating, I almost yelled, “Deal!”

  This was going to be interesting.

  ***

  Helena

  The moment we arrive at The White Rabbit, something feels different. For the first time since I’ve been in New York, I feel happy to be out amongst the people, without feeling tired. I guess everything was coming together in its own way. And I’m happy for this. Felicity and I stroll up to the entry, where B-Rock, the massive, bald-headed African-American security guard, makes us kiss his head before getting in. He is a sweet guy and tells us his wife, Honey, had just given birth to their fifth child the previous week. He gets double kisses for that.

  Felicity and I hold hands as we sweep through the crowd over to the stairs, where a new Alice is manning the out-of-bounds, family-only, VIP area. Having been here a few times before, I know the protocol. Smiling, I start, “Hi. We’re on the list. Helena Kovac and friend.”