Finding Me (The Music Within Book 3)

by Faith Gibson

  Several women had tried to get them both to dance. Bryan graciously declined, but after a while, Andy had taken them up on their offer. Bryan turned his stool sideways so he could still talk to Kason while keeping an eye on his best friend. Not that way. He wanted to make sure none of the men started anything. Right. Andy was a good dancer. He moved with the music like it was part of him. Bryan guessed it was. Andy was musically inclined, so it only made sense he’d have rhythm as well. When a country song came on the juke box, Andy and the girl he was with joined several others in doing the same dance around the floor. While most people just shuffled their feet, Andy twirled his partner like they’d been dancing together forever.

  When a slow song came on, Andy looked over at Bryan with a funny expression. Bryan held his breath as couples began swaying with their bodies plastered together. Andy said something to the girl he was with. She smiled and waved. Andy returned to his seat and chugged the fresh beer Bryan hadn’t noticed Kason set down. Bryan didn’t know how to dance, but if it would have Andy holding him in his arms, he’d be willing to learn. “Maybe you should have been a stripper, Lily. You sure do know how to move.” The words were out of Bryan’s mouth before he could stop them.

  Andy’s face lit up. He leaned close so no one else could hear him. “Were you watching my ass, B?” Andy winked before signaling to Kason. Bryan knew he was blushing, but damn, Andy’s warm breath was doing a number on his cock, and his attitude was giving Bryan emotional whiplash.

  When Kason got a free minute, he came to their end of the bar. “You ready for another?”

  “Nah, we’re ready to tab out. I’m ready to take this ‘un home,” Andy said with a wink.

  What the fuck? Bryan put some cash on the bar to cover his tab and a big tip. When they got to the truck, he asked Andy, “Are you trying to out yourself or just staking your claim on me?” He was halfway joking, but when Andy pressed him against the door of the truck, Bryan sucked in a breath.

  “Maybe both, B.” They had parked in the lot across from the bar, and nobody else was around as far as Bryan could see. Andy noticed Bryan scanning the area, and he looked around, too. “Nobody but us. And even if there was, I wouldn’t give a shit.” Andy leaned in, and just when Bryan thought he was going to kiss him, Andy said, “I’ve been thinking.”

  “Yeah?” Bryan whispered, licking his lips.

  “I think we should invite Kason over for the Fourth of July.”

  “What?” Bryan clenched his fists. Here he was ready to humiliate himself again, and Andy was thinking about another man. If that wasn’t a kick to the nuts.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Andy

  Andy enjoyed dancing, and the woman he was dancing with was good at the two-step. It was hard to grow up in Texas and not learn how to dance. Every time he looked at the bar, Bryan was staring at him. He might have been looking at his dance partner, but the way his eyes were hooded, Andy knew better. He’d spent all day Thursday trying to figure out what the hell happened between them that would have made Bryan run. If the man had ever jerked off, he had to have gotten spunk on his stomach. Having Andy’s jizz on him shouldn’t be any different. It wasn’t like he’d asked him to lick it off his fingers or anything. Thinking of licking Bryan’s jizz was getting Andy horny, and that wouldn’t do while dancing with a woman. He would hate for her to get the wrong idea.

  When Andy had grabbed Bryan’s clothes to add to his own so he’d have a full load, he’d found some of his things mixed in with Bryan’s. He’d also found the wet underwear Bryan had been wearing that night. The only conclusion Andy could come to was that Bryan had come in his briefs and was embarrassed. Andy thought it was hot as fuck. He couldn’t come right out and ask if that’s what happened without causing further embarrassment, so he decided to play things down. He would go back to his flirty ways, and if Bryan took the bait, so be it. What he didn’t count on was being so turned on that he couldn’t stop himself from thinking about kissing his best friend. It was something Andy had wanted to do since he met the man. But when he got close enough to do so, Andy feared the rejection and changed tactics. Besides, he wanted to get to know Kason better, and he figured the Marine wouldn’t mind hiding out on the farm to stay away from the fireworks.

  Seeing as they were in the parking lot of a small town, redneck bar, he didn’t think pushing his luck any further was wise in both regards. Andy didn’t want to get in a fight and go to jail. Not when they could go home and pursue whatever he was feeling in private. When Bryan just stared at him like he’d punched him in the gut, Andy leaned away and said, “Let’s go home, B.” By the hurt on Bryan’s face, he’d been expecting something totally different.

  On the drive home, Andy had to sit on his hands to keep from touching Bryan in ways sure to make him wreck. Andy was ready to say ‘fuck it’ and throw caution to the wind. If Bryan turned him down sober, it would hurt more, but at this point, Andy was ready to take that chance. When they pulled in the driveway, Bryan said, “What the fuck?” There were two strange cars parked by the house. “Was Mal having a party and didn’t invite us?”

  “I don’t think so,” Andy answered. One of the cars was an older sedan. The other was a brand-new Camaro. One of these things doesn’t belong. When they got out of the truck, the first thing Andy noticed was the dogs weren’t outside waiting on them. The second thing was the fire in the pit had dwindled down like it hadn’t been tended in a while. The third thing was the alarm was already set when they entered the back door. The house was quiet except for the clicking of Moe’s toenails when he met them in the kitchen. Curly was not with him.

  As soon as they turned the corner, they found Curly. He was lying on the floor next to the couch. The couch where someone was snoring loudly. Andy tiptoed over, and Curly thumped his tail on the floor. As he knelt down to give the dog some loving, Andy studied the person asleep. Bryan stepped behind him, and Andy looked up at him, shrugging. Bryan gestured toward the bedroom with his head, so Andy stood and followed him down the hallway. When they got to Bryan’s room, Andy stepped inside and closed the door for some privacy.

  “I would be worried about a stranger sleeping on the couch, but the dogs were calm, so I guess he’s a friend of Mal’s, whoever he is,” Bryan said.

  Andy had been ready to finally taste Bryan’s lips, but now he wasn’t sure it was a good idea. What if the stranger got up in the middle of the night, or Mal came downstairs to check on him? “There were two cars. Who do you think the other one belongs to?” Before Bryan could answer, there was a thump upstairs followed by footsteps. “Cade,” they answered together.

  Now that Andy had time to think about things, he decided to go for it. What did he have to lose? Andy pushed away from the door and said, “I think we should…” at the same time Bryan said “I don’t think we should…”

  Andy stepped back and held up his hands. “Yeah, you’re right. We shouldn’t. Goodnight, B,” Andy stammered and rushed to his room. That didn’t go as planned. He’d been hopeful Bryan was past what happened when they played poker. Obviously he wasn’t. When Andy had grabbed Bryan’s clothes to wash for him, he’d seen Addison’s phone number on the nightstand. Instead of throwing it away like Andy hoped, Bryan still had it. Why couldn’t it have been in his jeans where Andy could “accidentally” wash it? No, he wouldn’t do that. Hell, he was the idiot who’d gotten the girl’s number in the first place. No wonder Bryan was confused. Or against being with Andy. Or whatever the fuck he was. Andy needed to find a way to go get laid, or at least get a blow job so he could get his mind off fucking his best friend. Maybe he’d borrow the truck and head off to Nashville.

  Instead of grabbing a toy or jacking off, Andy went to bed and kept his hands under the pillow. He forced himself to think of things that would keep his dick from getting hard. Things like Patrick. That was a stupid thing to do, because it was only inviting the nightmares to join him in his sleep. He didn’t know which was worse – dreams of what Patrick had done
or dreams of Bryan rejecting him.

  When Andy awoke from a dreamless night, he thanked anyone who was listening for that small favor. He’d all but given up on there really being a God when Patrick hurt him and his family turned their backs on him. As he opened the door to his room and headed to the bathroom, he heard someone in the kitchen opening and closing cabinets. Andy hurried and did his business in the bathroom before seeing what the commotion was. The man from the couch was obviously looking for something.

  “Can I help you?” Andy asked.

  The man yelped and turned around holding his chest.

  “Jesus, fuck, you scared me.”

  “Sorry about that. If you don’t mind me asking, who are you?”

  “Oh, I’m Tyler.”

  The name sounded familiar, but Andy couldn’t place it. “I’m Andy,” he said. Not that it explained who either one of them were.

  “Nice to meet you, Andy. You got any aspirin? My head’s fucking killing me.”

  “Sure, but if you have a hangover, I have the perfect cure. It works better and faster than pills.”

  “Whatever, man, just give me something.” Tyler plopped down at the table and held his head in his hands. Andy started a pot of coffee before mixing together a smoothie that was nasty but killed a hangover quickly. He should have made one for Bryan after their poker night, but he didn’t think his friend would have appreciated it.

  “Here, drink this. I suggest you down it all at once instead of sipping.” Andy poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down next to Tyler.

  Tyler sniffed the smoothie and jerked back.

  “Good mornin’,” Mal said as he entered the kitchen. Andy hadn’t heard his boss come down the steps. When he looked down, he noticed Mal was barefooted. He’d never seen Mal without his old boots on.

  “Morning,” Andy replied. Tyler didn’t respond verbally. He might have grunted, but he could have been trying not to throw up.

  “What are you drinkin’?” Mal asked Tyler, pointing at the smoothie.

  “Some nasty shit your friend here thinks is the wonder cure for what ails me.”

  Mal poured his own coffee and told Tyler, “If Andy said it’ll work, it’ll work.”

  “Then you drink it,” Tyler whined.

  “How does your wife put up with three kids?” A tall, blond god asked from the doorway. He wasn’t as thick as Andy, but the man was stunning. His chest was adorned with tattoos. He had the same nautical stars Andy did and a compass in the middle of his chest. And were those… Andy almost salivated at the sight of the barbells running through his nipples. Damn, Mal had done well for himself.

  When Andy caught Mal’s gaze, he ducked his head and mumbled, “Sorry, Boss.”

  “I thought you’d be gone by now,” Mal said, looking at Tyler.

  “I wanted to apologize to Cade, for, you know…”

  Dammit, what had he missed? Andy and Bryan should have stayed home last night instead of going to the bar. Not one to be left out of a conversation, Andy asked, “What happened?”

  Cade stepped into the kitchen and leaned against the counter, crossing his arms over his perfectly sculpted chest. If he were Andy’s boyfriend, Andy would want the man to put a shirt on instead of showing off the goods. Andy did his best to look at Tyler and not the man making his dick hard. When an image of Bryan flashed in his mind, Andy felt guilty.

  The blond said, “Tyler had a little trouble with his zipper. And his dick. I can’t remember getting so drunk I couldn’t put my own junk in my pants.”

  “You didn’t…” Andy must have heard him wrong. There’s no way he would have helped the man put his dick in his pants.

  “He did,” Mal seethed. Oh, shit. That was the first time Andy had seen his boss anything less than calm. Normally, Mal was across the board laid back. He was nowhere near happy with Cade nor Tyler.

  When Andy looked over at Tyler, the man’s face couldn’t have been any redder. It didn’t help that he was light-complected. It made the embarrassment that much more pronounced. Andy couldn’t help the laughter that burst out of his chest. He would love to have seen that little scenario play out. “Drink up, Tyler. It’ll help with the nausea you’re probably feeling right about now.” Andy chuckled again. He knew he was being an ass, but he couldn’t help himself. Taking it a step further, Andy asked, “Mal, since you have company, are you going to cook us some biscuits?” Mal had taught Andy how to make biscuits, but they weren’t as good as Mal’s. Andy glanced over at Tyler, who was glaring at him.

  “It’s Bryan’s day to cook,” Mal reminded him.

  Seeing Bryan out of the corner of his eye, Andy groaned, “Ah, man. You know he can burn water. Why you wanna do us that way?”

  “I heard that, asswipe. Next time, you can burn your own damn water,” Bryan growled as he entered the kitchen. Instead of making a fool of himself and ogling the boss’s boyfriend, Bryan tipped his chin in an unspoken hello to Cade before turning his attention to Tyler.

  Tyler took a deep drink of the smoothie and let out a belch. “Damn, that shit’s nasty. And you complain about someone else’s cooking?” he asked Andy.

  “That’s okay, limp dick. Call me and apologize later when you feel better,” Andy snapped back, grinning. Bryan frowned at Andy, oblivious to why he’d be calling a virtual stranger “limp dick.”

  Tyler pushed back from the table. “On that note, I’m going home. Mal, I’ll call you if I hear anything else.” He didn’t look at the others, just headed toward the back door. As Cade followed Tyler, Mal’s eyes tracked them, scowling. Andy really wanted to know all the details of the night before.

  As soon as Tyler was safely out the back door, Cade stopped right next to Mal, leaving no room between their bodies. He leaned over and pretended to whisper, “I really don’t want burnt water. Will you please make biscuits? I’ll repay you later.” Cade turned to Bryan, offering an apology, “No offense.”

  “None taken. I’m Bryan, by the way.” Bryan held out his hand to Cade, and they shook. Cade reached across the table, and he introduced himself to Andy. He didn’t miss the fact that Mal was watching them closely. After they shook hands, Cade excused himself and ran up the stairs. He returned less than a minute later sporting a Motley Crüe T-shirt.

  Even though it was Bryan’s morning to fix breakfast, Mal agreed to cook. Andy had been exaggerating when he accused Bryan of burning water. They had been tag-teaming all the meals on Bryan’s day. He was getting the hang of the simple things like bacon and sausage. Once Andy told him to cook it slow so he didn’t burn it, he was getting better. Bryan was obviously a fan of Cade’s band. Instead of acting like an awestruck groupie, he asked intelligent questions about the music process as well as the new band Cade had recently joined. Andy was completely out of the loop since he didn’t listen to hard rock, but when Cade explained what all went into cutting an album, Andy sat up and listened. Cade Anderson was a down-to-earth man. He didn’t put on airs, and he definitely didn’t act like his shit didn’t stink. He also didn’t try to hide the fact he was completely in love with Mal. Andy doubted the two men had admitted their feelings to each other, but it was evident in the way they couldn’t keep their eyes off the other how they felt. One thing Andy noticed about Cade was that he loved sweet tea. He drank almost all that was in the jug before they ever sat down to eat.

  During breakfast, Mal explained to Andy and Bryan who Tyler was and why he had come to visit. “I guess I have some explainin’ to do. I told you both a little about my past and how Dwight found me and my boyfriend.” Mal rubbed a hand over his chest before continuing. Andy had seen the scar that cut a mean path down the middle of Mal’s body. “Tyler was that boyfriend. I haven’t talked to him in a long time, but last night he came to warn me.” Cade reached over and took Mal’s hand in his. He knew what was coming, and he was giving his man his strength. Jealousy eased its way into Andy’s mind. Not over Mal and Cade specifically, but because they were there for each other.

 
“Tyler’s been gettin’ threats from Dwight. Even though he was sentenced to forty years, he’s up for parole after ten. He told Tyler he’s got men watchin’, and if Tyler goes to the cops, the men will go after his family. Dwight gave Tyler a message for me. Said when he gets out, he’s gonna finish what he started.”

  “Holy shit. What are you going to do?” Andy asked.

  Cade answered for Mal, “We are going to be prepared. I want both of you to carry weapons at all times while you’re on the farm.” Cade sounded more like their boss than Mal did, and he wasn’t finished. “I’d prefer if you didn’t leave Mal alone until the threat is over.”

  Mal tried to interrupt, but Cade stopped him. “No, Babe. This shit’s serious. I know you have your shotgun, but Andy and Bryan are trained with weapons, so there’s no reason they shouldn’t both carry their pistols as well as rifles or shotguns. When it comes to your safety, I won’t take this lightly. Dwight may be all talk, and since his threat was he was going to finish what he started, that gives us until the day of his parole to figure out a plan. I’m going to get on that today. Now, I want to see these baby cows you’ve been bragging about,” Cade said, changing the subject.

  Andy offered to do the dishes so Mal and Cade could go calf watching. If he was truthful, it was one of Andy’s favorite things about his days. He’d never given much thought to birth since he’d never had an animal of his own, but seeing those little fellas being born had been like a miracle. What was even more astounding was how quickly they began walking around. Now that he was alone with Bryan, things felt pretty awkward, but they had the issue with keeping Mal safe to talk about.

  “That’s crazy about Mal’s dad,” Andy said while he filled the sink up with soapy water. He and Bryan had fallen into a routine where Andy washed and Bryan rinsed and dried. As comfortable as it usually was, something about doing it that morning hurt Andy’s heart when Bryan stood next to him at the sink. Bryan wasn’t relaxed, that was for certain.