The Mayor of Noobtown

by Ryan Rimmel

  You are in a leather working shop, Quality: Poor.

  Now that I had the menu, crafting was actually easy. I selected simple leather armor, because it required fewer materials than I had. First, I had to make some twine and some leather strips.

  I started with the leather strips. I selected them from my crafting menu, and my hands began moving, seemingly of their own accord Taking a piece of leather, I quickly cut it into strips. My skill in any of the crafting professions was higher than normal, because I had the actual Crafting skill. Mechanically, it gave me a bonus and substituted for my actual Leatherworking skill. While I’d never actually done anything with leatherworking, my strips came out as if I’d been doing this for years… well months, at least. I’d had a 0% chance of failure but lacking the Leatherworking skill. I would have had no chance of getting an improved result.

  That task finished, I went out and made twine. That was easy enough and could be made from a variety of sources. I used the bark of many nearby immature trees and ended up with a decent sized spool after a short while.

  Having gathered all my supplies, I checked to see how much I would need of each. Home Depot, eat your heart out; with my menus, I could tell exactly how much I had vs how much I needed. Given that I wouldn’t be failing at all, I could afford to make myself an entire set of leather armor plus a helmet.

  The process was similar to the way it worked before; I selected the option on the crafting menu, and my body more or less went through the motions automatically. I could stop mid process, with a small chance of damaging the item, but I could also restart the process.

  I had never made armor on Earth, but I got the impression, once again, that it was a much faster process here. The chest piece took about 15 minutes, with the rest taking substantially less time. It looked rugged enough when I examined it.

  You have acquired: Poorly crafted Simple Leather Armor (Chest), Defense 4, Durability 30/30, draining

  You have acquired: Poorly crafted Simple Leather Armor (Pants), Defense 3, Durability 20/20, draining.

  You have acquired: Poorly crafted Leather Armor (Gauntlets), Defense 3, Durability 15/15, reinforced

  You have acquired: Poorly crafted Leather Armor (Boots), Defense 3, Durability 15/15, stealthy.

  You have acquired: Poorly crafted Leather Armor (Helmet), Defense 4, Durability 20/20, open face.

  You have acquired: Poorly crafted Leather Armor (Bracers), Defense 3, Durability 25/25, item can block +4 defense.

  You have acquired: Poorly crafted Leather Armor (Set), bonus Defense +1 to all pieces.

  So, with my new armor on my defenses improved:

  Defense:

  Head: 14 (9 base + 4 helmet +1 set bonus)

  Torso: 14 (9 base +4 armor +1 set bonus)

  Legs: 13 (9 base + 3 armor +1 set bonus)

  Arms: 13 (9 base + 3 armor +1 set bonus)

  You are lightly armored due to Simple Leather Armor set, which provide a total of 18 defense. Your total defense is now 14. This increases the cost of your Dodging skill by 50% and increases your Damage Mitigation by 4 points. Several pieces of your armor are draining, reducing your Stamina recovery over time. After more than 8 hours in the armor, your Stamina will recover only 75% as quickly, with longer times further reducing recovery. Your armor has the stealthy property improving your Stealth skill by 5%. Your helmet is open face, strikes to your face ignore armor. Your bracers can employ the Block skill. Successful blocks grant them a +4 to their Defense skill and can be used to block strikes against another part of your body.

  Your Light Armor skill reduces the penalty to your Dodge skill to zero. Further improve your Light Armor skill to discover other abilities.

  Standing and moving around in my new armor felt like I was wearing regular clothes, for the most part. They didn’t breath as well; I could tell that eventually I’d have to remove them, but that was for later. Now, I was actually geared up to kill me some goblins. I selected my quest menu and found Goblin Menace and sensed several opportunities.

  To the north of the village was the forest, and to the south was the ocean. Both were pretty majestic sites, however, none of my quest targets were in those directions. There were many of them to the east, so I climbed the wall on that side of town to get a better look. It was the first time I’d gotten any elevation to see what was going on around my village. As I looked, I realized that I could see mountains in multiple directions. Looking around further, I could see them closest in the west, and somewhat more distantly in the east. The mountains to the north were quite a ways off, at least several days. We were in some sort of valley.

  With my Perception and Lore skills, I was able to pick out the signs of a camp to the west. This was also where one of my quest targets were located. The camp looked reasonably large, but I’d have to get closer to really do an in-depth investigation. I wasn’t sure that was the best idea at the moment.

  Taking my supplies, I went back over to the Creek House and spoke to AvaSophia.

  She was sitting in the house, the plowing complete due to the intervention of Kappa. That left her with quite a bit of not farming to do. She’s spent the time working on the house and tending to her children and Kappa.

  AvaSophia had also used her Food Preservation skill, which of course, was a thing. She had built a crude smoker out of a log, standing it up and hanging bits of meat inside. By building a fire at its base, and placing steel at the top for a roof, the salted deer meat had been smoked for hours. By doing this, none of the meat would go bad and have to be thrown out.

  The Warg was sitting on a rug with EveSophia, who was using him as a pillow. She was telling him a story about some dumb talking dog that solved mysteries with his stoner friends. Every so often, the fire would pop or she would stop and the Warg would sigh. While the fire cared not for the wolf’s murmurings, EveSophia would simply continue reading. Meanwhile, JoeClarance was brushing tangles out of Kappa’s fur.

  In short, the Warg was living the life. AvaSophia looked less dubious about the whole plan now that the planting was done. She was currently spending her time mending one of JoeClarance’s shirts. He had only two, in so far as I could tell.

  “I’m going west to deal with some goblins,” I said nonchalantly.

  AvaSophia’s eyebrows raised, “To the western gate?”

  “If that’s where they are, certainly,” I replied. JoeClarance suddenly stopped his brush work and looked up at me. This led to another sigh from Kappa.

  “There are a lot of goblins there,” he said, while staring at me with near terror in his eyes.

  “Well, I’ve killed quite a lot of goblins, so I’ll be fine.”

  AvaSophia watched me for a moment, “We were captured near the western gate.”

  Put my foot into it, I thought, “Well, all the more reason to deal with it now.”

  Putting down the shirt, she glanced away before looking back to me, “My husband died there, along with many other people from my village. They were skilled hunters and fighters, but when the goblins came, it didn’t matter. Those monsters killed some and captured the rest.”

  EveSophia had stopped speaking and Kappa turned to me, “It is very dangerous there.”

  “I need to kill whomever leads the goblins at that gate. Do you know who he is Kappa?” I asked.

  “He is a very bad goblin. He does things to humans that are best left unmentioned,” Kappa placed his head on the teary eyed EveSophia and pushed her further into his fur, “especially children.”

  I couldn’t stand for that, I thought. “I’m going to do it, and I’m not asking permission from anyone.”

  JoeClarance was trying to behave, but EveSophia was gently crying into the Warg’s fur. Not the sendoff I had wanted. I stood up and left the house, but AvaSophia chased me down.

  “If you are hell-bent on doing this, I need to tell you something. After the goblins ambushed our caravan that was escaping Harcharles’ army, the survivors were dragged through the old Western Gate Fort to
the valley. I didn’t get a chance to see much while they marched us through the courtyard. However, when the goblins marched us away from the gate, I saw a large crack in the inner wall, facing towards the valley. It didn’t look very safe or durable, so it may not be as well defended as the rest of the wall.” Then she knelt down and scratched out a rough picture in the dirt. Her map showed up clearly and she circled the southeastern tower when she was done, “Here, but be smart. If there are too many, you can come back without getting yourself killed.”

  I took the stick, “where did you see the crack?”

  AvaSophia gestured to a spot and I drew a large X there, “Thanks,” I said, noticing a prompt.

  You have learned about Cartography, you are unskilled: Never Eat Soggy Waffles!

  I blinked several times. All I had to do to get a world map was draw an X on the damn ground? It was so fucking simple that it had never even occurred to me. Inhaling sharply, I calmed myself. Of course, that’s how it worked. I could hear Shart laughing in my head.

  Quest: Please Come Back Alive

  Your town needs you. The entire population of your town desires you to return alive from your next quest, bonus 25% experience.

  The entire population of my town was a statue, the residents of one house and myself. But heck, I’ll take bonus experience.

  Thanking AvaSophia, I left.

  Chapter 17: Journey to the Wall

  Status: Jim

  Hit points 115/115

  Stamina: 125/125

  Mana 40/40

  New Skills

  Cartography: Unskilled

  Improved skills:

  Leatherworking: Amateur

  “Well, that is a particularly bold plan,” stated Shart, as I was walking west. He had finally reappeared as I started my trip outside the village, landing unceremoniously on my shoulder with a wet plop.

  “Given there is a non-trivial risk to my person, I thought you’d be opposed to it,” I replied.

  “Hardly. I need you to level up or I’m never going to get through my Demon Door,” said the demon as he perched on my shoulder.

  “Which I won’t be opening,” I stated coldly.

  “We’ll see. I have faith in you, my boy,” replied Shart.

  The map was immensely helpful, especially after I figured out how to add a minimap to the edge of my awareness. I do mean awareness, not vision. The map did not occupy any visual real estate; I could just sort of sense it at all times to know where I was and where I was going. It wasn’t Google Maps by any account, but it was far better than nothing. Bluntly, it looked like an untalented kindergarten with a crayon had drawn it.

  Earning Cartography experience was easy enough; you just had to expand your map. I checked the skill menu, but there were several sub-skills tied to the map that I couldn’t make out. I had figured out one, Exploration, before I left town. Simply going to the square was enough to unlock this skill

  You have learned about Exploration, you are unskilled. This is a sub-skill of Cartography. You find it easier to discover points of interest on your map.

  On my map, icons represented all the buildings in the village. One was for my home, which showed up as a house. The town square itself appeared as a star. The ruins of the church were marked by a cross, and the town hall was represented with a velociraptor. I figured out how to assign icons by the time the town came up. I gained some cartography experience for that.

  While I was walking, I started reviewing my maps from my previous adventures in the forest. These had been made before I possessed the Cartography skill, so they were vague, to the point of being useless. I had an approximate idea of where I first landed in this world, but nothing got detailed until I possessed the skill. I suspected I could find my way back to the Grove of Demon Smiting if I was required to, but even that was dicey. I was able to append the town map into my realm map. That got me to about the halfway point of the next level.

  Now my map was less crude, but still not great. It was like a talented kindergarten with a fancy crayon had drawn it.

  Overall, I guessed that unless I found a large, detailed map that I could copy, I was going to get most of my experience in this skill from walking around. Special locations, like the Western Fortress, would gain me a bit in my Exploration skill and experience.

  I was now several miles away from the town. While there had been a road cut through the forest at one time, it was presently overgrown; thus, I was avoiding it. This left me moving in a zigzag pattern through the forest as the mountains loomed larger to the west. I spent my time gathering berries, hunting small game, and otherwise doing woodsman stuff. It was relaxing for the most part; I was getting used to my new equipment and the forest didn’t seem as hostile as it had in the past.

  The only point of interest had been a cave. Coming off a sharp rise, it almost looked like a skull. Rocks around the entrance appeared as teeth, with a downward spiral leading into the cavern. I could just imagine descending down into its depths, almost as if I was a bit of food, sliding down an esophagus. Looks creepy, but what the hell? I thought, as I’d started to enter. I actually made it to the rock teeth before Shart chimed in.

  “I wouldn’t do that, but then again, I like not begging for death,” he commented. I was getting a solid “evil monster lives here” vibe from the location. I decided it would be better to search that particular area after I’d dealt with the goblin menace.

  I parkoured from rock tooth to rock tooth, leaping away from the gaping maw and returned to the forest.

  Eventually, night fell. I found a good place to rest in the crook of a tree; it required me to make a truly epic vertical leap and then I used my Shadow Meld skill to all but vanish. I dozed off for several hours before hearing a noise in the forest below. I cracked an eye open to see several Warg riding goblins, carefully marching through the area.

  “He vanished,” stated a goblin below me after a long moment.

  “Must have jumped into a tree,” stated another, “Make sure he doesn’t drop down on us.”

  “We’ve been chasing him for hours. He must have known we were following him. Why go down so many jagged paths otherwise?” stated a third.

  “This could be the cave all over again.” The goblins and several of the Wargs sucked in air at that comment. They all looked around carefully, staring deeply into the darkness.

  With Shadow Meld, I’d mastered the ability of standing so incredibly still that I became invisible to the eye. One of the goblins unknowingly pointed his crossbow directly at me, while his Warg stomped around and sniffed the air. I checked my quest log; none of them were my quest markers.

  There were five goblins and five Wargs, as far as I could tell by looking. Using my Lore skill, I examined one.

  Goblin: Warg Rider Level 5

  Health: 40

  Stamina: 50

  Mana: 5

  Skills: Bow: Amateur

  Sword Amateur

  Warg: Level 4 Beast

  Health 60

  Stamina 80

  Mana 5

  Wargs are the trained hunting mounts of goblins. They are magically enhanced wolf pups that are given a special alchemical diet that causes them to grow larger and tougher than the usual breed. The diet also reinforces them, allowing them to be ridden by small humanoids. Actual abilities vary depending on the breed. This one is based on a common Mountain Wolf. They are known to be disloyal but are quite common.

  “Maybe he covered his tracks.”

  “But then the Wargs should find him.”

  “Oh, yeah. They did such a good job at the cave.”

  “He must be in the trees,” one yelled, and they continued searching the trees with their crossbows. One shot a bolt into the air, while the rest pivoted around to see what he shot at. A moment later, a raccoon fell from the tree and struck the ground. Within seconds, several of the Wargs were snarling and tearing at the meat.

  That was my chance. I drew my bow and readied the first arrow. I could jump from this
tree to a slight rise in the earth. It wasn’t far to some underbrush, where the goblins would have trouble staying on their Wargs. I partially considered just leaving them be, but they might stay below me all night. More pragmatically, if I couldn’t kill 5 goblins, I probably had no business attacking a fortress full of them.

  I shot the first one as he was trying to control his mount. The arrow tore through him, knocking him from the saddle onto the ground. He landed precariously close to where the snarling Wargs were tearing at their fresh meat. Their lack of discipline coupled with new goblin meat caused the barely controlled feeding to collapse into utter confusion. Two of the goblins, the ones who’s mounts were farthest away and seemingly more controlled, started looking into the trees. They didn’t quite know where I was, or even if that had actually been an arrow; their companion, for all they knew, could have simply slipped. The other two goblins were having even more trouble now that there was extra meat for their hungry Wargs. The also did not seem to be impressed by watching their companion being torn apart by their mounts.

  As the other two cast about looking for their unseen attacker, I realized that my Shadow Walker perk had stopped. I was still up in a tree at night, hidden by leaves, but I was no longer invisible. I drew back for another shot, the strain in my muscles apparent as my Stamina bar began its slow drain. I needed to hit one of the other targets unaware, so I would get my sneak attack bonus. Ideally, I would do so in a way that didn’t reveal my position to the other one. Also, I had to hurry because it sounded like the Warg fight was letting up. Glancing down confirmed the wild wolves were down to goblin bones.