by Fitch, E. M.
"Well, don't blame me if one of them bites you in your sleep!" she called out, her voice echoing up the stairs.
Marsden ignored her, turning back to the group. "I say anyone who walks in here infected is pretty damn stupid. None of you are stupid, are you?"
It was Emma of all people who answered. "Of course not," she bit out scathingly. Marsden nodded.
"How long are you going to keep us locked up?" Jack asked. He looked impatient, his jaw clenching as he waited for Marsden's answer.
Marsden took his time answering, keeping his steely gaze on Jack. Kaylee could see his fingers stroking the handle of the gun he had tucked in his waistband. Before he could answer, the raven haired women Kaylee noticed behind the pinball machine was at his elbow, carrying a large tray of food. Kaylee's mouth started to water. In the center of the tray was a casserole dish, steaming and smelling of meat and potatoes. It was Shepard's Pie, she could tell from here, though she wasn't sure she wanted to know the replacement for the traditional beef.
"Put it here, Maggie, on the floor." Marsden used his toe to indicate where to drop the food. Maggie did, offering a slight smile to the group before turning and leaving. "Now I'd say," Marsden began as all eyes were trained on the tempting food, "that the fact that you still have your weapons on you and this venison pie here are two damn fine gestures of good faith. You all behave in here and cause no trouble and I see no signs of infection from the lot of you and tomorrow you'll all be free as birds to wander around in here. One night, you have my word."
Jack nodded as Nick said, "Thank you." The door swung shut and Kaylee could hear the bolt slide into place.
"Do we think that's safe to eat?" Anna asked in a whisper as Marsden's footsteps were fading away. Kaylee's stomach sank. She hadn't even thought of that.
"What could killing us gain?" Emma asked, clear longing in her voice as she stared at the food.
"Knocking you out could gain more," Andrew murmured, his eyes still on his father.
"I'm willing to try it," Emma said.
Jack frowned. "One of us should," he said. Nick moved forward. He grabbed one of the scattered forks on the tray and plunged it into the casserole, shoving a bite into his mouth before Kaylee could say stop.
"Dad!"
He swallowed before answering. "It makes sense that it's me," he said thickly. "I'm injured and I'm not letting any of you girls do it. Calm down, it tastes fine."
"How long till we know for sure? Anna?" Jack asked, watching Nick guardedly.
"Half an hour?" Anna guessed. "Just to be sure."
Nick nodded and moved back to the window, gazing once more back to the water. Kaylee joined him.
~
Emma swore it was half an hour later, though as she was the only one timing it, only she knew for sure. Kaylee doubted it, it felt like less than that to her. But her father was perfectly fine, no stomach aches, no nausea, no drowsiness. Even Anna was satisfied that there was nothing terrible about the meal. It was still warm when Kaylee took a bite. It was difficult not to moan. The meat was flavorful, soaked in gravy, and the potatoes were real, not the boxed stuff that she and Emma used to make with boiled rain water in the fire station. Even the boxed potatoes they hadn't seen in over a year. This meal was heavenly.
By the time everyone had eaten their fill, Emma using the utensil pocketknife she had tucked in her jeans, night had fallen. Kaylee's father kept drifting back to the window, his eyes roving the reservoir.
"I bet there's fish," he said, when Anna asked him what he was looking for.
"Probably," Andrew answered, yawning. "They build these things with fish throughways, a way to get the natural wildlife through the dam so it doesn't mess up the ecosystem. You could close the throughway off, if you wanted to, and the fish would pretty much pile up. Wouldn't be hard to catch."
"You know a lot about it," Jack observed. He was sitting on the bed closest to the locked door, his head in his hands. He had eaten with the rest of them, but he had barely said a word. Kaylee could see how anxious he was, how much he wanted to be sure Quinton was okay.
"I've read every book on power plants I could get my hands on," Andrew answered, pulling down the wool blanket to his cot and slipping under the cover. Bill was laying on the bed to his left, still fine but asleep already. "Hydroelectric is the most ideal. It would depend on the condition of the turbines, of course, but if they were okay you could keep this place going for a hundred years, no problem."
"You'd know how to do that?" Jack asked, looking up. Andrew nodded. "Best keep that to yourself, all right?"
Andrew frowned, but nodded.
"What's wrong with knowing that?" Emma asked, getting up from the end of Andrew's bed as he kicked up the covers. He settled in under the thin blanket as she collected the plate he left on the floor, stacking it with hers and placing them both on the tray that still sat in the center of the room. "Isn't it a good thing that he knows? Couldn't that be helpful?"
"Yeah, I'm sure he could," Jack answered. "But Marsden seems like the type who'd want to keep that kind of information to himself. Let's see how it pans out."
A worried look crossed Emma's features, but she nodded, frowning as she crossed the room and shut the door to the bathroom. It struck Kaylee how much they were keeping from their new hosts. Anna being a nurse, the tanker, Andrew's knowledge of power plants, Emma's bite, Quinton. It was the right, the safest, thing to do, she had no question about that. But she had never before considered just how valuable those pieces of information could be. Anna being a nurse, for example. Just her knowledge and the way she knew how to use all the medical equipment and drugs, it was a powerful thing, useful, life-saving. Did Anna realize that her knowledge made her a commodity? Just as Andrew's did? Jack seemed to realize it, Quinton too. But then again, they had been traveling together for some time. This was rehearsed for them, almost routine. What information to hold back, what not to say. How did they ever learn to trust anyone?
"Should we keep watch?" Anna asked, her eye line switching from Jack to Nick and back again. That was the other strange thing about Quinton not being in the group. He and Jack had only joined their group recently, it hadn't been more than a couple months at most, and Kaylee never before realized just how often the rest of them had looked to him for answers.
"Jack? What do you think? I could take first watch," Nick said.
"I don't mind, actually," Jack answered, his eyes past Nick and through the window behind him. "I have to see if I can signal Quinton anyway."
"He won't be looking for you for hours yet," Kaylee interjected softly, eyeing Jack from her bed. "Dad can watch first and wake you at midnight." Nick nodded his okay at that and glanced at his watch.
"Get some rest, Jack," he said. "I'll wake you."
Jack's brow furrowed but he nodded, slipping under the covers of the bed closest to the door and the farthest from Kaylee. The rest, all except Nick, did the same.
Chapter Five
Kaylee blinked into awareness, startled at first by the intensity of the dark, the completeness of it, like she was shut in a box with not even a pinpoint of light to hint at an outside. But then there was light, bursts of it, rhythmically pulsing by the window near her bed and she realized what woke her.
It must not have been that long ago that she fell asleep, it didn't feel like that long ago. But she slept deeply enough to leave her confused on waking. It had been a couple weeks since she had slept on a real bed.
And of course it was darker here, she was inside. No stars or moon overhead, only one small window. And at the moment that was almost completely obscured by the outline of a man.
She was still watching him when the light shone again, bright enough to cause her to wince because she had been staring right at him and she was not expecting it.
"What are you doing?" she asked in a whisper, knowing it was Jack now that she had seen his sharp profile in the flash of light.
He started and turned towards her, clicking off the fl
ashlight. "Did I wake you? Sorry," he murmured. With the light off, she couldn't see his features, just a dark silhouette, turned in her direction.
She shook her covers off and moved to join him. "It's okay," he whispered, just as she stood next to him. "Go back to sleep."
"Did he signal back?" she asked. She nodded towards the flashlight but doubted he noticed. It was dark tonight, especially under this roof with no moon shining down on them. Kaylee thought she saw his head shake, but she couldn't be sure. She reached out, her fingertips finding his shoulders and she let her hands drift up, catching his neck and finally his face. She asked again. He shook his head slowly and she kept her hands against his skin, his cheeks warm and rough with stubble.
Pine and rain and honey.
She inhaled slowly, knowing she missed him but not able to voice it. Her fingers fell from his face and he turned, aiming his light out the window once more and clicking it on and off in a rhythm she barely recognized.
"Morse code?" she asked softly, watching him.
"Yes, though I don't know a lot of it, just a few simple messages Quinton taught me."
"SOS?"
She could hear the grin in his voice as he whispered back. "If I need it, but we're okay for right now. I don't want him to panic and rush in here."
She watched him send his message again and then turned to scan the forest below. She could make out the shapes and the outline of the forest, the swaying of the black trees against the midnight sky. Everything was black, not shining like it would in moonlight, but shrouded. There were still varying shades though, the water a reflective inky black, the sky smudged, and the trees speckled with openings and swaying movement. It made it just possible to differentiate.
Any return light would have been immediately obvious.
"He would know to look for it?" she asked, meaning Jack's signal. She felt more than saw him nod.
"We always have a backup plan."
It made her think of when Jack and Quinton first found them, in the firehouse. What was the backup then? Did they keep some big secrets? Did they still? When did you know someone enough to trust them with all of it? Maybe after you kissed them senseless on a rooftop.
"What about when you met us?"
"You?" Jack asked, and there was that old twinkle, that smirk in his tone that lit something internal in Kaylee. He laughed softly. "You, Kay, you were just so helpless. Didn't make much sense to keep things from you."
Kaylee pushed at him and he elbowed her back. She knew he was smiling now.
"But you did," Kaylee whispered after a minute, after Jack sent out another set of coded flashes. "You kept the tanker from us."
She was standing close enough to him now, not touching, but close enough to feel him shrug in the darkness. "We did, but it wasn't really deliberate. You remember how that first night was, you bleeding and unconscious, Emma yelling at me. But when I carried you into the firehouse, no one questioned my trustworthiness. Quinton's either. We were accepted by everyone pretty easily. Well, everyone but Andrew." Jack paused and Kaylee heard a soft laugh escape him. "But that was for entirely different reasons."
Kaylee felt a warmth steal up her neck, thankful for the darkness so Jack wouldn't see. It wasn't that long ago that Jack had first barged into her life, her neat and expected (as expected as anything after the outbreak could be) life. He turned it upside down when he came, erased that future that had been mapped out for her with Andrew, replaced it with color and warmth and uncertainty. But it was better. Even with Quinton separated from them now and Bill hurt, it was better. It meant more now. There was purpose beyond just survival.
"I'm surprised he's even speaking with me now," Jack added softly, almost as an after thought.
"Andrew?" Kaylee asked. "Of course he is."
"Does he know? Does anyone else-"
"Only Emma," Kaylee answered the question Jack couldn't finish. But she knew what he was asking, had she told anyone about their mother.
"How is she?"
"Strong," Kaylee answered in a whisper, her eyes seeking out Emma's shape in the darkness, but of course it was too dark to see her. "She always was stronger than me, I think."
"Not stronger," Jack whispered. "You're strong too. She just knows how to hide her feelings better than most."
Kaylee nodded, grateful he thought she was as strong as her little sister but doubting the truth of his words just the same. The silence stretched and though Kaylee knew she should be tired, she wasn't ready to return to her bed, no matter how warm it had been. The sounds of sleeping surrounded them, restless shifting, deep breathing, soft snoring coming from Bill's bed, or maybe it was her dad, it was tough to decipher. Jack kept his flashlight pointed out the window, sporadically sending out his message to the blackened forest below.
"There he is," Jack finally whispered, relief coloring his words as he sagged against the window frame. Kaylee leaned into him, peering into the blackness. There at the base of the trees, where the water met the land, a bright light was blinking back at them. Jack was squeezed next to her, pointing his light out and answering in blinks and clicks.
"Is he okay?" Kaylee whispered.
"He's worried about us, but he's fine. We'll try to meet tomorrow, midnight, back at the fence." As Jack whispered, he was clicking the flashlight on and off. When he finished, he pocketed the light. Kaylee could feel the the relief flooding him. She was relieved too. He relaxed, his whole frame melting a bit on the spot. She could feel it, feel the way his stance shifted a bit behind her, feel his breath hitting the back of her neck as he exhaled slowly. She turned, not quite sure if she wanted to face him, to stand so near to him. But the darkness helped. It masked whatever was flashing through her eyes. He didn't step back. Her chest bumped lightly into his and his fingers reached forward to grab her hips. She stiffened, but she didn't break free, didn't turn to her bed. Because a large part of her didn't want to, a large part wanted that sweeping blindness that came when her mouth pressed to his, when she let him override every other thing with his proximity and heat.
And he was about to, she felt that, knew it in the subtle shifting of his stance. His hands drifted higher, lightly tracing her waist. His head lowered, closer to hers. She felt her eyes drift closed against the blackness of the room. It was only in that last moment, when she could taste his breath on her lips, that she pulled back.
Because it was still there, the red dot, blurring her vision when her eyes closed. She wanted to sob, wanted it to stop, wanted to never see the color red ever again in her life.
But she did, and it froze her.
Jack sighed, not with impatience or irritation, but almost as if resigned, almost as though he felt he deserved it. Which was worse because he didn't. It was unjust and unfair and Kaylee knew it, but she didn't know how to change it either.
"Jack, I'm-"
"Don't worry about it, Kay," he interrupted her whisper, his voice soft yet heavy. He brought his lips to her forehead and kissed, lingering. She moved into his chest and let her cheek rest, inadvertently counting his heartbeats. This time it was he who pulled back.
"Get some sleep," he whispered. Without waiting to make sure she listened, he walked over to his bed. Kaylee heard his covers rustle before she could move from the window.
~
"Anyone up?"
Kaylee rolled over, stirred by the whispered voice she didn't recognize and the knock that accompanied it on the locked door.
"Yes, we are," answered Nick. Kaylee open her eyes and noted that her dad was right, everyone was up. Except for her. Jack was already at the door, standing next to her father and waiting for it to swing open. Anna and Andrew were hovering over Bill, who seemed like his old self again, pushing them away. And Emma was peeking out of the bathroom, a toothbrush hanging from her mouth. That sight prompted Kaylee out of bed.
"Where'd you get that?" she whispered at her sister, nodding at her toothbrush. She could hear Jack and her father still speaking through the door. Whoever w
as on the other side was telling them to get back so she could bring food in.
"Under the sink," Emma answered, pointing. "There's a whole bunch. Toothpaste, too."
It was too tempting, running water, a sink, and a clean new toothbrush. Kaylee kicked her sister out and took over the bathroom for herself.
When she emerged, having clean teeth and a clean face and feeling fresher than even after her bath in the cold river, she was faced with a disgruntled Jack.
"What's wrong?" she asked, looking up at him.
"They won't let us out," he answered through grit teeth, pushing passed her and shutting the bathroom door. Kaylee looked to her father and Andrew, both of whom were shoveling eggs into their mouth at an alarming rate.
Eggs.
Her newly clean mouth watered as she saw the steam swirl over the plate of fluffy, yellow eggs on the floor in the center of the room. The aroma hit her and she could have swooned. She hadn't had eggs in years. She instantly forgot what Jack said about not being let out and grabbed a free plate. They had given a generous amount and Kaylee took a large portion. Everyone else was already eating, Emma grinning at her over her pocketknife fork.
The first bite was heaven, as though she had forgotten how much she enjoyed eggs until this very minute. They were scrambled and the taste invoked memories of Sunday breakfast with her mom, runny fried eggs on toasted english muffins, the diner on the corner where she and Andrew and their old friends would meet after a movie and order breakfast for dinner. Warm and wonderful and missed.
Jack came out of the bathroom, still scowling. He walked right past the breakfast, pacing to the door. He leaned against it, ignoring the feasting group behind him. Kaylee frowned. She scooped her last bite and swallowed quickly, stooping to grab what was left on the tray and a spoon.
"Here," she said, knocking him in the arm with the plate. "Sit and eat."
"I'm not hungry," he said. "I want to get out of here."
