My phone buzzed in my pocket and I looked at the screen. Valerie was going to be thirty minutes late. I looked up and down the street, suddenly afraid. The street lights were on, but it was eerily silent. I scanned the sky. No moon.
I texted Valerie back and told her I’d walk a block down to Chambers Diner, and I’d wait inside for her. It stayed open an hour later than the creamery, so I wouldn’t be waiting alone in the dark. I wrapped my arms around myself and walked quickly down the street, eyes on the glowing windows of the diner.
Chapter 10
Johnny
Chambers was busy tonight. I sat at a table with Clay, eating nachos and drinking a Coke, watching people and overhearing bits of conversation. Mostly, I was thinking about Audrey. What was going through her mind? Was she thinking of me right now? My chest felt full of possibility.
I looked toward the counter where Graham and Christina stood, waiting on their order. He kissed her cheek and headed toward the bathroom. Graham hadn’t been gone but one second when Toby Woods took his place beside Christina.
She moved a step away, but he closed in. On high alert, I narrowed my eyes and nudged Clay. We watched as Toby’s hand landed on Christina’s hip. “I’ve told you, Toby, I’m with Graham.” Christina’s voice was loud, and several heads swiveled in their direction.
Thinking that would settle it, I absolutely could not believe my eyes when Toby’s hand slipped down and he fingered the hem of her skirt.
I saw red.
Not waiting to see what would happen next, I stood so fast my chair toppled over behind me. Hearing Clay’s rough breath at my back, I felt confident in grabbing Toby by the collar and dragging him toward the door. He hadn’t seen me coming, so it was easy to knock him off his feet. Christina screamed, a high pitched wail that drew more eyes our way.
All thoughts vacated my head as adrenalin took over. Someone kicked open the door in front of me, and a crowd of people tumbled out into the street to watch.
I was all impulse at that point. I drew back my arm and landed a hit on his jaw. He wrestled with me, clawing at my arm. Someone shouted, someone laughed, Christina screamed again. Clay grabbed at Toby’s arms, pinning them.
I landed another punch, lifted my chin to try and catch my breath, and that’s when I saw her. Audrey. She stood about twenty feet away, staring at me. Her eyes were wide, her jaw was slack, and the hand I’d used to hit Toby throbbed.
The look of shock on Audrey’s face fell away and she glared at me, disgust evident in her eyes. I flinched, and in the time I spent watching her turn and walk the other way, Toby slipped out of Clay’s grip and got a good hit on my stomach. I doubled over and sucked in a breath, more concerned about Audrey’s reaction than about a bruised gut.
I stood straight and took a couple steps backward. Graham appeared, stepped in front of me, and got a hit on Toby’s shoulder. “I got this, man. Take a breather.”
I spun and searched the crowd for Clay. He nodded at me, letting me know he’d have Graham’s back, so I took off up the street after Audrey.
I held my hand up to shield my eyes from the glare of the streetlights. I scanned both sides of the street. Nothing. I looked down an alley, and she wasn’t there. I walked past Meadowlark and peered around the building, and there she was, leaning against the bricks with her hands folded across her stomach, breathing hard.
“Audrey?”
She jumped, and let out a flustered breath, then turned her back to me. “Go away, Johnny.”
My heart sank. She’d made clear her opinion about fighting, and I’d already let her down. I should listen to her and leave, but I didn’t want to leave her here alone. “Do you need a ride?”
At my question, she turned on her heel, and her eyes were blazing. “Stop asking me if I need a ride. I’m not getting on your motorcycle. I’m not going anywhere with you.”
I took a step forward. “You’re mad.”
She shrugged.
“If you’re mad, you can say so. You should be mad. We talked about this a few days ago, and here I am in another fight.”
“Okay, I’m mad.”
Her voice was as tiny and soft as a kitten.
“Do you want to know why I hit Toby?”
Her eyes snapped to mine. “That was Toby? He goes to my church! He’s a nice boy.”
I put my hands on my hips and shook my head, speaking low. “Toby is not a nice boy.”
She narrowed her eyes. “What makes you say that?”
I clenched my jaw, my temper rising at the memory of his hand on Christina’s skirt. “He took liberties with Christina.”
The look of surprise returned to her face, but fell away after only a second. “Surely you didn’t have to hit him, Johnny. Couldn’t you have found some other way to solve it?”
My name in her mouth, laced with anger, shook me to the core. “Like what, call the police?”
“Sure. Why not?”
I barked a humorless laugh. “The police wouldn’t do anything in a situation like this. It would have been Toby’s word against mine. Who do you think they’d believe?”
Her eyes softened the tiniest amount. “Walk with me?” I asked. “Let’s discuss this further.”
“Now you’re willing to discuss it? Couldn’t you have tried that earlier, before resorting to violence?”
“I wasn’t going to discuss anything with Toby.”
She studied me for a moment. “What about Christina, though? Did you discuss it with her? Ask her what she wanted you to do?” She pushed off the wall and walked out of the alley, at a pace that let me know she was accepting my offer to walk.
“Fair point,” I conceded. “I should have discussed it with Christina.” Audrey gave me a slight smile. We walked up the street toward Gladiola Park.
“You know what I really don’t like about fighting?” she asked.
“What?”
“It scares me.”
I shoved my hands in my pockets and bent my head low, ashamed. I hadn’t expected her to say that. “What scares you about it?”
She looked at me with an open, sincere expression. “Everything. Did you know people can die from being punched wrong? My dad gets called out on emergencies sometimes. If it’s something really bad, they call an ambulance, but they call him when they want him to decide if the injury is serious enough to call an ambulance. I have so many memories of him being called away. It’s terrifying. We’ll be at home, maybe having dinner, maybe watching a movie or sitting outside, and he gets a call. Then he’ll say to Mama, ‘So-and-so fell in her kitchen,’ or ‘Someone fainted at the park,’ But more often than you’d think, it’s that somebody hit someone else. He grabs the bag he keeps for that purpose, and leaves in a rush, not even taking a second to kiss our heads like he usually does. Then we’re all left at home, wondering if it’s someone we know. Wondering if the person will be okay. It’s scary, Johnny.”
Crushed. I was completely and totally crushed. The last thing I ever wanted was for Audrey to be scared—not for any reason, but especially not because of me. My father had scared my mother. I knew what that did to a person. I stopped walking and waited for her to turn and look at me. “I’ll stop.”
“You’ll stop what?”
“I’ll stop fighting.”
Her nose scrunched up in confusion. “Just like that?”
“Just like that.”
She watched my face carefully, most likely searching for signs that she could trust me. Better than anyone else, I knew that trust couldn’t be promised, it had to be proven. So that’s what I’d do. I wouldn’t fight anymore and I’d prove it to her.
Without another word, she continued walking. And of course I followed. I wanted to lighten the mood. “Now that I’ve given up fighting, will you go for a ride on my bike?”
She gave me a look, but couldn’t help laughing. “You should stop fighting because it’s the right thing to do, not to get me on your motorcycle.”
I groaned, hamming it up. “
Audrey, you’re killing me.”
We’d reached the park, and she crossed the grass and sat on a bench. I joined her, and due to my size versus the size of the small bench, our thighs brushed. She leaped up like I’d stung her, looking at me with wide eyes. She paced the area in front of the bench, wringing her hands. “Tomorrow I’m telling Keaton Asher I can’t date him,” she blurted. “Actually, I already told him, but he wanted me to think about it more. So tomorrow’s the day. And then after that, I mean...after that.” She paused and cleared her throat and looked at me. “Sorry. I don’t expect you to care about all this.”
I leaned forward, watching her carefully, and tried not to let the venom I felt toward Keaton leach into my tone. “I care.”
She shuffled her feet and looked away.
“Are you upset about telling him?”
Her eyes wandered back to mine. “Upset? Sort of. He’s a good friend, and I’m afraid I’ll lose him because I can’t be more than a friend to him. And it’s going to upset some other people, too.”
I worked to keep my temper under control. This guy was making it hard on her, making her suffer because he didn’t want to let her go. “Why would other people be upset? Who?”
She pinched her bottom lip. “His parents love me. I’m practically family already, because our families are so close. His sister is my best friend. His mom told me once that I’m meant to be with him.”
I stood and walked to her. It was a big risk, but I took hold of her hands to stop her wringing them, and held them in my own. She went silent and looked up at me with her big, brown eyes. “I don’t believe in meant to be,” I said.
I heard the quick breath she took in. “What do you believe in?”
“I believe in the here and now. I believe in the sun on my back and the grass under my feet. I believe in making choices. I believe in doing what feels right in my gut and in my heart.”
She smiled softly. “Did your heart tell you to punch Toby?”
I threw my head back and let out a full-throated laugh. I was fully, completely under her spell. She constantly surprised me and kept me on my guard. Audrey smiling at me like that was the most beautiful sight I’d ever seen. I met her eyes again. “Actually, yes. But from now on, I won’t let it get the upper hand.”
I squeezed her hands and, as if realizing I was touching her, her expression changed from enjoying the pleasure of a real conversation to dismay. I let go.
She stepped back and her phone rang. “Oh no,” she said, scrambling to get her phone out of her pocket. “I completely forgot my sister was supposed to pick me up.” She put it to her ear. “I’m so sorry, Val. So, sorry.” She glanced at me. “It’s been an...interesting night. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
She tucked her phone back in her pocket and turned to me. “Will you walk me back to Chambers?”
It wasn’t a ride on the back of my bike, but I’d take it.
Chapter 11
Audrey
I hurried to the car, a foil tray of Mama’s macaroni and cheese balanced on each forearm. I set them in the open trunk next to the five other trays, and when Cat came out with the last one, we had to rearrange them so they’d all fit. Cat closed the trunk and we went back inside to see if there was anything else Mama needed.
Mama stood at the counter powdering her forehead, and when she was finished she clicked the compact shut and put it in her purse. She smiled at us. “Ready?”
The Alden Independence Day picnic was one of the bigger events in our small town. I smiled as we carried the trays of macaroni to the food tables. I had heaps of fond memories from the day, ranging from climbing trees with my sisters to Ruby and I grabbing a cherry pie off the dessert table and taking it across the park to eat the entire thing ourselves. There was the year Keaton and I went for a walk in the woods at the edge of the park and got lost for two hours, and the year my cousin Tyler let us teach him to dance the Electric Slide.
My sisters and I stood in the food line and filled our plates while Dad spread a blanket on the ground next to the Ashers. I gave myself a moment to look at Keaton before he saw me. My heart ached. That was my friend, and I was about to break his heart for the second time, this time for good. He must have felt me looking, because he looked up and smiled at me. I couldn’t return the smile. I was too sad. I wasn’t sure when we’d have a moment alone together, but perhaps I could ask him to go on a walk.
I sat on my family’s blanket and looked at my plate, which was filled with tiny piles of about thirty different foods. Pitch-ins were my favorite type of meal, and I didn’t want to miss a taste of anything. I took a bite of bean salad and listened to the chatter around me.
“I’ll give you five bucks if you eat anything other than macaroni and cheese,” Aunt Glory said to my cousin Tyler. I looked at his plate, and saw that it was completely filled with Mama’s macaroni, and nothing else.
“Not worth it,” Tyler said, shoving another bite into his mouth. “I don’t want any other foods taking up space that could be filled with Aunt Blythe’s mac and cheese.”
Ruby dropped down onto the blanket next to me, her plate filled with desserts. “I love this ridiculous picnic,” she said. “I am going to eat all day. I’m not stopping until the fireworks start.”
“It’s a solid plan,” I said, smiling at my friend. Keaton didn’t say a word to me. Maybe he could feel my mood emanating from me.
“Where’s Cat today?” Ruby said, looking around.
I pointed to a couple across the grass, close to the tree line. “She and Jesse are sitting over there. He offered to sit with us, but people were already staring and coming up to him, asking for pictures and stuff. You’d think people would be used to it by now.”
Ruby’s face went red, and I immediately knew she had been thinking of catching a glimpse of Jesse today, maybe exchanging a few words. I laughed. “I’ll call you next time he stays for dinner, and you can hurry over.”
She grinned. “Deal.”
“Can I come too?” Keaton asked. “I’d like to meet him.”
Shocked, I looked at him. “Really?”
He shrugged. “I like his movies.”
“Of course you can come, Keaton. You are always welcome. No matter what.” My throat clogged with emotion and tears stung my eyes. I hoped he’d still want to spend time with me after today.
As he took the last bite of his food, I set my mostly untouched plate aside and stood, catching his eye. “Walk with me?”
He seemed surprised, but he stood quickly, brushing his hands on his pants. “Okay. Sure.”
We walked to the edge of the park in silence. The words in my head, words I knew I needed to say, were all tangled and knotted up. I tucked my hands into the pockets of my skirt so he wouldn’t try to hold my hand. “How was your trip?”
“Good. The usual—swimming in the lake, hot dogs over the fire, Grandpa’s stories.”
I nodded. “Sounds nice.”
“Are you going to watch the fireworks tonight?” Keaton asked once we were a fair distance away from the crowd.
Instead of answering his question, I asked one of my own—one I hadn’t known I was going to ask. “Do you ever get restless, Keaton? Do you ever want to do something crazy?”
He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye, and chewed on his lower lip. After a moment, he said, “Like what?”
“I don’t know, like drive to the city and go dancing, or go skinny dipping in the lake. Skydiving. Talking to strangers. Anything that makes you feel alive.”
He blinked slowly, his eyes moving over my face as if trying to understand me. His confusion made sense. This was a part of myself I kept hidden from everyone.
“I feel plenty alive here. I like the things I do. I like our friends, and going to the diner, and walking around town. And I think I prefer to swim with a swimsuit on in the lake.” He smiled, testing to see if I was joking.
I didn’t return the smile. “I like those things, too.” It was the truth; I
did like those things. But I wanted more. “But don’t you ever want to get your pulse up? To kind of scare yourself a little bit?”
His eyes went wide. “Uh, no. Not really.”
“I do. I want to challenge myself. I want to do things I thought I couldn’t do. I want to try new things that seem scary and see if I can really do them. Other people do these things, why not me?”
“Audrey, are you okay?”
I walked to a bench. Keaton sat beside me, and I sat on my hands so I wouldn’t fidget. “You asked me to think, and I have. I’ve been thinking a lot about my life, about my future, and what I want.” I paused and took a deep breath. I forced myself to look at him. “You and I want different things.”
He blinked, his face going pale. “What are you saying?”
I had to say it. I had to spit out the words. They came out harsh and unpolished, but true. “I really gave it a lot of thought. I tried, Keaton, but I don’t want to be your girlfriend.”
He flinched as though I’d hit him. “You’re sure?”
My voice was barely above a whisper. “I’m sure.”
He ducked his head and turned away, rubbing his palms on his pants. He gulped in a lungful of air, and I heard his breath catch in his throat. He was fighting back tears.
My heart raced. I wanted to take it back, to make it go away. But I couldn’t. There was nothing I could do about his pain. I put a hand on his back but he jerked away. “I’m sorry, Keaton. I care about you so much, and I—” I stopped talking, knowing anything I said would make it worse.
He sat up straight, and the rims of his eyes were red when he looked at me. But tears weren’t falling. He looked stone faced. “Thank you for being honest.”
I wanted to throw my arms around him, but I realized with a start that I couldn’t do that anymore. It wouldn’t be fair to him. I’d known this would hurt him, but I hadn’t understood how much it would make me ache, as well.
He looked away, staring off into the distance at the people playing frisbee, at the dogs running around, at the kids climbing trees. “I’d like to be alone.”
Broken Rebel (Sparrow Sisters Book 2) Page 7
