Kate nodded. Sadly, she only had a few minutes, unless he was going to drive her to work.
Austin set her coat and purse aside and shrugged out of his suit coat. Kate had never thought of herself as bold, but seeing the obvious muscles under his soft-looking white shirt made her all kinds of daring. She lifted both hands and placed them on his broad shoulders. The muscle she felt under her fingertips was incredible. She’d deal with her fears, and the fact that she needed to stay away from him, tomorrow.
Austin smiled seductively at her and ran his hands slowly up each of her arms, along the back of her shoulders, and then down her back. He settled his hands on her hips and drew her gently against him. Kate swallowed hard but couldn’t swallow away the desire for him or her suddenly dry throat.
He placed a tender kiss on her neck and then groaned, “Kate.” He glanced up at her, straightened, and kissed her hard and strong. Kate’s legs were mush and her lips tingled. She clung to him and returned the kiss with everything she was feeling inside. This man was the man she never thought she’d find. He was good, kind, accomplished, handsome, and made for her. Michael Callan hadn’t been seen in years. Austin would keep her safe.
When he pulled back, he stared at her, his dark eyes filled with wonder. “Do you feel it?” he asked almost reverently.
She smiled and framed his handsome face with her hands, loving the feel of his soft beard under her fingertips. “That we were made for each other?” she asked, hardly believing that she’d voiced those sappy but so true words.
Austin grinned, but it was a little unsteady. This was not his usual charming grin; this was a grin of relief and pure joy. “I love you, Kate,” he said solemnly.
Kate had to swallow again, and she had no clue how to return those words. Only her grandmother and mom had told her they loved her. Her dad had taken care of her from sixteen to eighteen, but he’d had no reason to express sentiment like that.
Austin’s smile softened but didn’t dim. “It’s okay,” he said quickly. “You don’t have to say it … yet.” He winked cockily. “But I didn’t want you to doubt my love for a second.”
“I … thank you,” she managed. “This is all just happening so quickly.” She’d been the one to say that they were made for each other, and she knew it was true, knew she loved him even if she couldn’t express it. But she was scared, plain and simple. Scared for reasons he might never know about.
“I know it’s quick, and if you need me to, I’ll …” He swallowed and said as though it pained him, “Slow down. We can date for years if you want. I’ll give you space so you can study, even if it kills me each second we’re apart. But this is right, this is real. I feel it all the way through.”
Kate didn’t know how to respond, so she simply pulled herself up on tiptoes and kissed him. Austin returned it, and then some.
The annoying ring of her phone penetrated through her haze of happiness. Kate ignored it.
“Do you need to get that?” Austin asked against her lips.
“That’s what voice mail is for.”
He chuckled and kissed her.
The phone interrupted them again. Kate sighed and pulled back. “It’s late for a telemarketer. Let me just see who it is.” He released her, and she walked on unsteady legs to the purse sitting on her coat. She pulled out her basic flip phone, and her brow furrowed. Her mom. “I … have to get this.”
“Okay. Do you care if I wait and drive you to work?”
“Thank you,” she managed to say. Hurrying to her room, she answered the call. “Hello?” Her mom only called every few months. She loved each chance she had to talk to her mom, but they’d talked a couple of weeks ago. What was going on?
“Kate! How are you, my sweet, beautiful girl?”
“Um, good.” She shut her bedroom door behind her and hurried to slide out of her dress and change for work. “How are you, Mom?”
“I’m just fine.” But her mom didn’t sound fine. There was something in her mom’s voice that terrified her. “Don’t you worry about me, love. I’m safe and studying my flowers. Soon spring will be here and they’ll let me plant some out in the yard. That brightens everyone’s day. Tell me everything. What’s new with you? Your voice sounds different, lit up.”
“I fell in love,” Kate admitted, hanging the dress in her closet. She gasped as she realized what she’d said. It didn’t take a genius to understand that her mom would not approve. Until Dimitri’s brother was found and apprehended, it wasn’t safe for Kate to do normal, wonderful things like falling in love.
There was silence on the line. Then her mom said quietly, “Oh, sweet pea. I … I don’t know what to say.”
Kate bristled. “Say you’re happy for me. He’s amazing, Mom. I know it’s crazy, but it hit us both out of nowhere. Love at first sight, like the movies.”
“I’m so sorry, love, but even if—” Her mom cleared her throat and sounded like she was swallowing lime juice as she spoke. “—it is the right one … you can’t risk him, Kate.”
Kate slid into her black work pants, pain ripping through her insides. “We haven’t heard from Michael Callan in years,” she snapped. “For all we know he could be dead.”
“Kate …”
There it was. She’d known something was wrong, known her mom wasn’t using up a precious phone call just to hear her voice.
“Oh, love. I got a letter today. From Michael. Threatening to find you and kill you.”
Kate sank onto her bed, her neck prickling with fear. “No,” she gasped.
“He’s still out there. You have to stay safe. I got special permission to talk to your campus police. They’re supposed to watch you more carefully. Keep their number on speed dial. Keep pepper spray on you. Watch out for anything that doesn’t feel right. And most importantly, stay away from any kind of media. Michael still doesn’t know where you are.”
Everything was spiraling out of control. Kate knew she had to listen to her mom. She knew she had to protect Austin. She blew out a breath and admitted what her mom would see as the nail in the coffin: “Austin’s a hockey player. He’s been signed by the Boston Bruins.”
More silence passed. “Oh, love. I’m so sorry. Can you imagine if the media saw you?”
She clutched the phone.
“Michael would not only kill you; he wouldn’t hesitate to kill this man you say you love.”
Kate had been selfish and stupid, thinking she could simply fall in love. She wasn’t a normal girl, and she would never forgive herself if she brought danger to Austin. Tears streamed silently down her face as her mom kept talking, reminding her of how strong and brilliant she thought Kate was, how much she loved her. She listened as her mom spelled out the ways she had to protect herself.
Her mom was right. The timing for her and Austin was all wrong. That didn’t change how much it hurt. She had to tell Austin goodbye.
Chapter Five
Austin paced the small dorm as he waited for Kate. Who had called and interrupted them? Somebody she absolutely had to answer. Was it one of her parents? A close friend in need? A boyfriend? His gut churned as he worried about the last one. Kate was so exquisitely beautiful, smart, kind, and genuine. He imagined she was chased after constantly. She hadn’t said she loved him back, and he knew he was pushing too hard, too fast. Yet how could he slow down when he felt so deeply about her?
Finally, her bedroom door opened. She walked out wearing a white button-down shirt and black pants with a red coat over her arm. Her waitressing clothes. He was sad to see her out of that incredible blue dress, but that didn’t matter. What did matter was the change in her demeanor and the look in her eyes. She looked hardened and … cold.
“Hey.” He offered a cheery smile, though his stomach was tumbling. “You ready for me to run you to work?”
“Yes, please,” she said. Walking past him, she grabbed her purse off of her dress coat and slid into the red casual coat without letting him help her. She yanked the door open and strode t
hrough it.
Austin’s brow furrowed as he followed her. What had that phone call done to her, to them? He hurried after her and got her door. She thanked him and slid in. Rushing around to the driver’s side, he got in and glanced over at her. “Everything okay?”
She shook her head slightly.
“Is there anything I can do?”
Kate’s mouth opened and her eyes glimmered briefly; then she folded her arms across her chest and looked away. “I’m going to be late.”
“Oh. Okay.” Austin started the Lexus and drove away from her dorm toward Jake’s.
The silence in the car was thick. Austin didn’t know how to cut through it. He felt desperate, unsteady. What had happened to her? What was going to happen to them? His mind scrambled for what to say, how to bust through the wall she was erecting between them. Why were her eyes so cold? Was she going to ditch him?
They pulled up to the restaurant, and she grabbed her door handle. Austin put a hand on her arm. “What’s going on, Kate?”
Kate wouldn’t look at him. “This isn’t going to work.”
“What isn’t?” But he knew. She was ditching him. He’d never had a girl break up with him, dump him, but he knew it was coming. How could it be that the one girl he’d fallen so hard for was going to dump him? It was all wrong, and he didn’t know how to stop it.
“You and I.” She shook her head and bit the side of her lip. “I’m so sorry, Austin. You’re a great guy, amazing, but this isn’t my path.” With that, she pulled her arm free and pushed out of the car.
Austin slammed the Lexus into gear, parked right in front of the restaurant, and jumped out, running around the vehicle and catching her as she reached the front door. He placed his hand on the door to prevent her from opening it. “Kate,” he begged. “Don’t do this. We both know what we felt.”
She gazed up at him. “You said you loved me?” she asked.
Austin nodded. “I do.”
“If you love me, you’ll let me go. You’ll let me do what’s best for me.”
He had no argument for that, except how wrong it felt and how much it hurt. “But why, Kate? Please. I’ll back off. We can take it slow. I don’t care if it takes years. We’re meant to be. Please don’t give up on us. Don’t shut me out.” He’d never felt this desperate for anything or anyone. His life had been blessed, and he’d been gifted with an amazing family, a charming personality, and talent at school and sports. Now the one thing he truly wanted was being denied to him. It was a horrific sensation.
Those incredible blue eyes softened. “I’m so sorry,” she said. He could tell she meant it.
“No.” He pressed his hand against the glass and shook his head. “No. You can’t just say ‘I’m sorry’ and do this to us. Give me something, Kate, please.”
Kate blinked up at him. “Austin … I can’t explain. My life is such a mess. It could take years for me to resolve it all so I could be free to be with you.”
He shook his head quickly. The thought of years without her made him nauseated. He craved her. He needed her.
“I’ve got things I have to do. I can’t explain. I can’t share.” She took a heavy breath, and the next words seemed to rip free from her throat. “It might never be resolved, Austin.” She hung her head. “I can’t ask you to wait for me.”
“Ask it … please.” He wasn’t above begging. Waiting for her would be torture, but as long as there was this bright ray of Kate at the end of the tunnel, he’d wait forever if need be.
“Austin,” she groaned. “Five years. Ten years. Maybe more. You can’t be serious that you want to wait that long. We hardly know each other.”
“I know enough to know you’re the right one for me,” he insisted. “I’ll wait for you. I’ll be so busy being a hockey superstar, the years will fly by.” He tried to grin through the lie. Without her, he couldn’t see a future. How would he survive? Yet he would be with Kate at the end. It would be worth it.
She reached up and unfastened her necklace. It was a simple silver chain with a pendant. He’d noticed it before, but now she held it up so he could read the words: Be brave, be true, be special, be you. Slowly, she reached out toward him and fastened it around his neck. Her gentle touch ignited a fire in him.
“This means a lot to you?” he asked, hoping.
She nodded. “It was my grandmother’s. It symbolizes everything I hope for, everything I love.”
He felt stirrings of hope that she truly did love him as much as he loved her. “I’ll wear it, always.”
She paused, then said in a determined voice, “I’ll send you a pendant to add to it once a year, through Fanzz. Watch for it.”
“Okay.” A pendant. So he’d know she still cared, that she was alive? At least it was something.
She gave him a tremulous smile; then she touched his face and gave him a soft kiss. Her eyes brightened with unshed tears. He wanted to grab her and hang on, extend the kiss, but she backed away quickly.
Someone pushed on the restaurant door from the inside. Kate shuffled to the side, and Austin swung the door wide and held it for the older couple leaving. In return, he received knowing smiles, like he and Kate were teenagers on their first date. Austin knew this was so much more than that.
As the other couple walked away, Austin gazed back down at Kate. “I promise I’ll wait for you. As long as it takes. I’ll pray you can resolve it quickly. But how will I know it’s time to come for you?”
Kate blinked quickly, but a tear escaped. Austin eased in closer, and his thumb brushed the wetness from her face. She leaned into his hand, her soft face the perfect fit against his palm. All too quickly, she straightened. “I’ll come for you. You’ll be easier to find.”
“Okay.” He ground out the word, but it hurt clear through. Why was he agreeing to this? Yet something in Kate’s eyes told him she wasn’t going to bend, and if he pushed, he might ruin the tenuous connection they had. He loved her. He had no clue if she loved him back, but he thought she did. If only she trusted him enough to let him help.
Austin knew he couldn’t just leave her with an “okay.” He wrapped his hands around her waist, spun her around, and pressed her against the glass door. She gave a cute little squeal of surprise, looking up at him with longing and concern. He bent down and kissed her thoroughly, hoping there was no doubt what he felt for her or where he stood. She was the one for him. He was going to wait for her.
The door jiggled and he had to release her and step back, holding the door again as more patrons walked out, this time a middle-aged couple who weren’t even trying to hide their grins.
“Thank you, Austin,” Kate said. “Thank you for waiting for me.” She looked steadily at him as if trying to memorize the details of his face.
He didn’t have any words as she slipped through the door he still held. She turned back halfway across the restaurant and mouthed, “I love you.”
Austin’s heart seemed to stop. Had he imagined it? No. He’d clearly read those words on her lips. He wanted to chase after her and kiss her again, to demand that she let him help her resolve whatever she was facing. Instead, for the first time in his life, he held back. Pushing her to accept his help would only damage them. That knowledge must have come from above, because on his own, he’d never be able to resist the impulse to help and shelter her.
He watched her rush through the restaurant and into the kitchen. His heart broke as she disappeared. Years without Kate …
The coach of the Bruins had unknowingly signed the most dedicated player in the world. Hockey and family would be Austin’s life, until Kate found him again.
What if she never came for him? That thought had to be pushed away quickly before it took root. He touched the pendant she’d given him. She’d come for him. They loved each other. Waiting would be horrific, but for Kate … he’d do anything.
Kate made it to the kitchen before she fell apart. She crumpled into a ball in an un-swept corner and sobbed. Everyone on the staff rushed o
ver to see what was wrong. She couldn’t find the words to explain, and she didn’t want to.
“Please … just give me a minute,” she managed to get out.
They all nodded their understanding and eventually left her alone, only sneaking glances at her. Kate buried her head in her arms, letting the tears flow as her shoulders shook and her entire body ached for Austin.
She’d done it. She’d pushed him away, just as she’d known she had to. It had hurt worse than living for six years without a hug from her mom. She hadn’t shed many tears when her dad had overdosed the start of her freshman year of college, but she missed her mom constantly.
Michael Callan had sent her mom a letter. No! She’d started to believe maybe he was dead, but apparently, he was still after Kate. The thought of the vicious, crazy Michael Callan going after Austin made her neck hurt and her stomach convulse. She couldn’t let that happen.
She had to focus on her plan. Law school would take three years, followed by who knew how long it took to get a job, make enough money to hire a lawyer, and get her mom free. She’d have a six-month grace period before she had to start paying her student loans back. She’d live more frugally. She’d make it work. Once it was proven that her mom hadn’t killed Dimitri, maybe Michael Callan would go after someone else. Yet he’d killed the gardener and the cook without knowing if they had even hurt his brother. She shuddered. Maybe he’d be caught before then.
For the first time that she could remember, she prayed. She prayed that Michael would be caught and that she, her mom, and Austin would be safe. She’d work harder. She’d get her mom free and somehow eliminate the threat of Michael Callan. How? She had no idea.
Yet … years without Austin. Fresh tears appeared. Maybe a miracle would shorten that time.
Chapter Six
Kate trudged to her dorm through deepening gloom. Spring had come, so at least she wasn’t chilled through by the time she made it to her dorm, classes, or work, as she was almost always walking. Two more weeks and she’d be graduated. She wanted to feel excitement for the next step: law school and then freeing her mom, being together as a family again, and eventually getting Michael Callan caught so she could go after Austin. These past few months of looking over her shoulder for her would-be murderer and being without Austin had been horrible. She ached for him. Sometimes she glimpsed him around campus, always surrounded by admirers. It was torture. Maybe law school would be easier, because at least he wouldn’t be so close.
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