Global Warming Fun 5: It’s a Dry Heat
Page 8
Chapter 6
Escape to Bakersfield
Mary slept soundly cuddled next to Ed in the comfortable king-sized hotel bed, but Ed was frequently awoken by persistent headboard-banging and moaning and grunting sounds from the next room, which was occupied by Snake and Doll. Snake apparently wasn't as tired as he earlier claimed. Or maybe Doll was doing most of the banging; Ed had no way of knowing; like her lover, China Doll thankfully lacked telepathic ability.
At breakfast and throughout the next day there were further talks and interaction between the humans and Mack. At first Clancy was upset that his best mechanic was leaving his shop but soon the four other Stone-Coats were fully operational and making motorcycle parts by the dozen. "We'll send several more Stone-Coats back from Yosemite," Snake promised. "Within a few months we should have every bike in the Confederacy repaired."
"Not so fast!" said Clancy. "That might be too much of a good thing!"
"I agree," said Hacker. "We'll have them primarily make parts, and leave most of the disassembly and reassembly work to the human crew. People need to have meaningful employment."
"You are an understanding dictator, Boss," said Clancy.
"But if their utility in the shop works out you should expand Stone-Coat use to other key need areas, such as water conservation, food growing, and fuel generation," said Ed.
"I've got some out of commission UAVs captured from the CHiPs that I'd like them to look at also," said Hacker. "We could use some air power and surveillance, and reconditioned CHiP unmanned air vehicles will work fine."
"Those and your motorcycles could contain in their structures Stone-Coat elements for self-maintenance purposes," added Wheels.
"With Stone-Coat help you could actually greatly increase your self-sufficiency and isolationism," noted Ed. "Stone-Coats are big-time game-changers."
"Could they make weapons for us?" asked Snake.
"We could but we won't," interjected Wheels. "War is too disruptive. We wish humans to control their population in other ways. We have a strict planet-wide prohibition against the design, fabrication or maintenance of human weapons. Bikes and UAVs can be produced and repaired by us, but not guns or other weapons."
"What about greenhouses?" Hacker asked. "Those could support improved food production with minimal water use."
"Certainly," said Wheels. "We already construct greenhouses globally, including in Northern California. We note that you have already discovered that underground living quarters for humans are much cooler in summers and warmer in winters. We could help develop improved underground homes for you as we did for Ed's Tribe."
"Yes, it’s true that we've already started to transition to energy-efficient underground dwellings," said Hacker. "We'll probably want you to help us with all such things eventually, but first we'll need to reverse anti-Stone-Coat attitudes and perceptions pervasive throughout our Confederacy."
"Aye," said Clancy. "Stone-Coat is a dirty word throughout the Confederacy right now. We'll have to gradually turn that around, starting with the mechanics of my shop. They'll soon have a positive outlook of Stone-Coats when they fix engine parts."
"Speaking of your shop, Mack wants to see Ed and me again," said Mary. "He says that he's finished."
It was late afternoon when Ed, Mary and friends returned to the Stone-Coat mechanic named Mack. Where once there was a block of granite, a shiny new three-wheeled vehicle of unique design sat: the completed version of what had already been well underway the previous evening. A transparent dome that looked much like the cockpit for an aircraft covered the seating areas for both passengers, while the remaining streamlined body was jet-black, covered by a clear shiny transparent layer of what looked like plastic. The wheels appeared to be of similar materials but the tires on them weren't black but gray.
With eyes wide Clancy stepped forward to knock soundlessly on a shiny black fender with his knuckles. "Solid! It's like knocking on a boulder!" he exclaimed.
"My external surface is an energy-absorbing net of graphene under a protective diamond outside layer, but there is a hard titanium layer under that," explained Mack. "The design is utilitarian but an aesthetic appeal to humans is also an anticipated consequence."
"It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen!" confirmed Snake, as he circled the vehicle slowly, examining every shining inch of it, while occasionally reaching out to gently touch it as if to verify that it was real. "I'm blown away! Part of that is me not being used to seeing new cycles, but the design of this thing is fantastic!"
"Do not concern yourself with causing finger prints," said Mack. "My entire surface is absorbent via nanotubes. I welcome dust, sand, insects, and any other form of nourishing materials."
"In other words you are self-cleaning!" exclaimed Clancy. "What a truly nifty thing for a vehicle!"
"The wheels are primarily graphene," I assume, said Hacker.
"Correct," confirmed Mack. "Graphene and diamond. What you call a 'flat tire' will likely never happen with me. As long as I am nourished with requisite raw materials things like tires and brake-pads will never wear out. Similar to biological life-forms, I self-repair myself."
"What is the canopy made of?" Hacker next asked.
"Primarily diamond with flexible graphene reinforcement," said Mack. "Its transparency and reflectivity are of course adjustable." The rear portion of the canopy darkened to gray for a few seconds, then returned to being perfectly transparent.
"What of your engine?" asked Clancy.
"A combination of hydrocarbon consuming rotary engine and electromagnetic coils provide motive force," explained Mack. "I must be exposed to sunlight and regularly consume hydrocarbons such as wood in order to operate at peak power."
"And what is peak power?" asked Clancy.
"Approximately between one to fifty horsepower," said the Stone-Coat; "one horsepower from electricity generated from nuclear decay, and additional power from hydrocarbon fuel, battery, and solar sources when they are available. Normal operating power will be over thirty horsepower when using only hydrocarbon combustion."
"And how much do you weigh?" asked Clancy.
"A ton and a half plus cargo," Mack replied. "I have kept my mass to an absolute minimum."
"You weigh as much as a small auto so you'll be cruising at no more than fifty on the flats and slowly puttering up hills and mountains at lawn-mower speeds," predicted Clancy.
"I'll be able to run rings around you on my cruiser," said Snake, "and so will Scar."
"That just goes to show that you can't have everything," said Ed.
"What about air conditioning?" asked Mary, who didn't really like high speeds anyway, especially when it came to small vehicles that she was inside of.
"That was easy to design in by using common human refrigeration strategies," said Mack.
"You'll be puttering around in a slow but stylish refrigerator," said Clancy.
"Can we take you for a spin now?" asked Ed.
"Yes; that is why I asked you to come," said Mack. "I WANT TO ENSURE THAT PASSENGER ACCOMMODATIONS ARE OPTIMAL AND THAT PERFORMANCE MATCHES REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS," he added quietly. "Please pack Wheels inside me," he said. A rear storage bin cover popped open. Mary stood and everyone watched Wheels fold himself into a golf bag-sized package that Ed with difficulty lifted and gently slid into the storage bin. It was of course a perfect fit.
Almost magically, the storage bin cover closed and the passenger canopy slowly swung open, hinged in the rear by graphene fibers. Ed helped Mary climb into her side-seat, and then sprang into his. They both immediately appreciated that sitting in Mack was like sitting in comfortable recliners rather than in typical vehicle seats. Mack must have already begun cooling the interior, because instead of a hundred degrees, it felt more like eighty as the canopy closed itself. Fresh cool filtered air circulated through the enclosure. "This is wonderful!" Ed exclaimed. "There are even cup holders!"
"Over a few hours of time I could generate cups and the drinks in them a
lso," said Mack, "but I would prefer that you bring those in from external sources such that they may later be consumed by me. Glass, metal, paper, or plastic containers are all readily consumable."
"Wake me up when it's over," added Mary, who obviously appreciated the cool comfort of her seat.
"How do I drive you?" Ed asked. There were a few dashboard performance indicators including a speedometer, but was no 'on' switch that he could see. However Mack was of course 'on' 24-7 so why would there be? There were also no gas or brake foot pedals; only a too-small steering wheel that suggested to Ed that he was nothing other than a passive passenger.
"If you wish you can help provide steering forces or indicate where and how you want me to move via implants or voices but that is of course totally unnecessary," said Mack. "I will drive myself. Excuse us!" he announced via external speaker to Snake, Hacker, Doll, and Clancy, as he slowly began to roll towards and then through the back-room doorway.
As Clancy and Doll hastily moved a few objects in the garage aside to allow Mack's passage, the entire mechanics crew gathered to watch the strange vehicle slowly and quietly make its way through the garage. "What the hell is that thing?" many uttered. "That must be what Clancy's been working on in the back!" said some. "It moves using some kind of quiet electric motor!" guessed a few. "Wow!" and "holly shit!" were the most common exclamations.
Mack fully controlled his own movement. Ed and Mary did mothing but watch the gawking spectators as they moved slowly past them. The two wide-spread front wheels meant that no balancing was involved, and the steering wheel moved on its own. At several points Ed's foot reflexively and unsuccessfully searched for a brake or gas petal but found none. Mack had full control of his own operation.
As they moved out of the building into bight daylight the dome tinted, especially overhead. Mack slowly accelerated to eight miles an hour on the flat smooth street. "This is top speed using only electricity from nuclear power," said Mack. "I'll add absorbed photoelectric power," he announced, as it sped to eighteen miles an hour, "plus battery," he added, as it sped to twenty five. Ed heard a barely audible wind and tire noise, but nothing else. Snake and China Doll were easily keeping pace with them on their Harley-Davidsons. Ed noticed that no side car was attached to Doll's shiny black and chrome cruiser.
"Can you hear me alright?" said Snake's voice in the cockpit.
Ed glanced to his left where Snake was keeping pace with them aboard his black and chrome Harley. Today the Confederacy leader had on a white Stormtrooper helmet with no snake-face overlay. Evidently the helmet supported radio communications. "Perfectly well," Ed replied.
"We'll be connected by encrypted voice and data messaging for the duration of this test and the trip," added Mack. "Is my performance adequate so far?"
"This would maybe be OK to commute around town in instead of peddling a bicycle," said Doll's voice. "Can't you go any faster?"
"WE'LL TRY USING HYDROCARBON COMBUSTION," Mack said to Ed and Mary via their implants, reminding them that they had a private means of communicating with both Mack and Wheels. There was a faint whirring sound and vibration from below as the rotary engine came to life under their seats and they shot forward perceptibly, moving up to forty miles an hour. "THIS IS THE LEGAL SPEED LIMIT BUT WE'LL BE OUT OF TOWN IN A COUPLE OF MINUTES. FASTEN YOUR SAFETY HARNESSES AND LET ME KNOW IF YOU DESIRE ANY SEAT ADJUSTMENTS."
There were indeed full-torso safety harnesses for Ed and Mary to clip on. They made requests for seat adjustments and found that they could sit fully upright or recline nearly completely. "Can we sleep here tonight?" asked Ed. "This is fabulous!" Meanwhile they went over several pot-holes that were barely felt. The ride was indeed a smooth one, and remained quiet even with the noisy motorcycles of Snake and Doll nearby!
They left the city limits and accelerated gradually, reaching fifty-five miles an hour. "THIS IS FULL SPEED USING ONLY CARBON FUEL WHILE RECHARGING BATTERIES," Mack announced. They slowly accelerated to sixty-five. "This is top speed using all power sources except what is diverted to cabin cooling and voice communications," said Mack aloud.
"This is plenty fast enough," said Mary. "I'm not used to such speed while sitting so low. The ground is whizzing by us frightfully fast!"
They slowed to fifty-five and after only a few more miles turned around and returned to Ridgecrest and drove back to and into the shop where they were greeted by Hacker and Clancy. "I have taken many measurements and will make a few minor internal design adjustments," said Mack, "but in a few hours I will be ready for us to begin our journey. Was my performance satisfactory from a human perspective?"
"It was wonderful!" said Mary.
"It was highly satisfactory," seconded Ed, as he climbed out of the cockpit.
"But it was anemic," said Snake. "Our bikes and Scar's have twice the speed and hill climbing ability. I don't see how we'll get through this alive."
"I can contribute atomic electric power," said Wheels, as Ed retrieved him from storage and he unfolded himself, "but comparatively little of it. My energy design supports only low speed motion for an order of magnitude less mass than Mack's."
"It will have to do," said Hacker. "Other than our hijacked aircraft Mack is our only option to getting Mary comfortably out of town. The other option is that you guys can still give up on your crazy vacation plan and fly back to where you came from. You can ride home in the transport airplane when it flies back to New York tomorrow or you can ride out of here tomorrow morning in Mack. Those are really your only options."
"I'm not giving up on this vacation," said Mary. "Period!"
"We'll continue on our vacation if you'll take us, Snake," said Ed.
"I said that I'd take you and I will," said Snake. "It will just be slower and probably more dangerous than I first figured. But what the hell! It's still better than a fucking desk job like my smarter brother has."
"Good," said Hacker. "I've already sent folks ahead along all possible routes. Scar will hopefully assume we're not dumb enough to head west into his territory and he'll figure you're going to head south to LA or north.'
"But I suppose we are dumb enough to head west," said Ed.
"We certainly are," confirmed Snake. "We'll escape to Bakersfield."
"Swell," Ed remarked.