Give Me Forever Love (Give Me Series Book 3)

by Paige P. Horne

  Mills was my happy and having you was my happy, but then I ruined it all and I can no longer live with the way that makes me feel.

  It’s too heavy. It’s all too heavy.

  I see you found your happy. Don’t ever let it go.

  I love you. And… I am sorry.

  Live because tomorrow isn’t promised. Love with no regrets and please forgive me, for it will only set you free.

  -Your mom

  I sobbed uncontrollably after I read the letter resting in my pocket. After all this time, she still hurts me. Why do we love the ones who toss us away? Why do we search for their approval the most? It makes no fucking sense. We don’t want to be that way; we don’t get pleasure out of chasing hurt and disappointment, and yet we do it anyway.

  All I ever wanted was for her to come back. That’s all I wished for and she didn’t. I want to be over this. I want to move on with my life.

  I want it so bad.

  And for some reason, I can’t do it. No matter how much I try, no matter how much I tell myself it’s a pointless waste of time. I should have gotten help a long time ago. I should have talked to someone about this mess, but I was never good at that.

  I was raped, abused mentally and physically. My own mother abandoned me, and I’ve never spoken about it until Bryce. I’m not sure if or when I would have told him, if he didn’t follow me to my hometown. I shake my head and massage my temples.

  Why would she write the suicide in the letter?

  Why the hell would she put that in my mind to think about? She told me she loved me. What a load of crap.

  Love doesn’t leave.

  Love doesn’t constantly hurt.

  She missed me every day?

  Bullshit.

  She could have come and got me if she missed me so damn much.

  I’m mad. I’m still so angry at her and she isn’t even alive anymore. She’s gone. Saw’s gone. The two people who fucked my head up are gone and I’m still here, suffering for their actions.

  Please forgive me, for it will only set you free.

  She’s right. I need to forgive her and not for her, definitely not for her, but for me.

  I need that freedom. I clench my teeth as I gaze out. My vision blurs, my chest feels heavy. “One day I hope I’m well enough that I can forgive you. Sadly, for me, today isn’t that day,” I murmur.

  I hear Bryce coming down the stairs and I blink my tears away and wipe my cheek before I turn around and see bed hair and sleep lines.

  “Hey,” he says, his voice deep and groggy. “What are you doing?” He walks closer wearing only basketball shorts, his expression turning from curious to concerned. “Why are you crying?”

  I take the letter from my pocket so he can see. He looks down at it, his eyes bouncing back up to me before he takes it from my hand. Walking closer to the window so he can see, he reads Bethany’s words. I watch the emotion wash over his face. A deep wrinkle sets between his brow, and he runs a hand over the scruff on his jaw.

  Bryce swallows and exhales. “Wow,” he says quietly. “You haven’t heard anything about this, have you?”

  I shake my head.

  “Come here,” he says, pulling me to him. My face goes to his chest and I inhale.

  “I’m sorry,” he murmurs. He kisses the top of my head and I soak up the comfort of his love.

  “She shouldn’t have written that in there.” And I love how he thinks just like I do. I love how he’s holding me, and I didn’t even ask. I love how he’s sorry when he has no reason to be.

  I love him so damn much, it consumes me.

  “No, she shouldn’t have, but she shouldn’t have done a lot of things.”

  He slightly pulls away and looks down at me. “Are you okay?”

  “She was so cold toward me when I saw her. She acted as though it was my fault, but those words contradicted her actions at Saw’s. It confuses me.”

  “It was never your fault, K. None of it was your fault. She had a problem, and it had nothing to do with you.”

  “Yeah.” I look out the window and bite my lip. “We got the short end of the stick with moms, right?”

  He scoffs. “Right.”

  I pull him back to me and wrap my arms around his waist, melting. The sun douses us in warm light, and I feel it through my bones. My childhood was shit, my teenage years were a nightmare, but my life now… it’s more than I could have ever imagined.

  And it’s all because of him.

  “You still wanna go?” His voice vibrates my cheek.

  “Absolutely,” I say, giving him a squeeze.

  “Good. Let’s get ready.”

  “Okay.” I lean up and kiss the two freckles on his neck before pulling away.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Kathrine

  I’d never been on a plane before, so I was a nervous wreck when we stepped onto the private jet. As we took off, I white-knuckled the seat like a true terrified champ.

  “Just relax, K. It’s going to be fine.” Bryce laughed.

  “I’m trying,” I said, taking a deep breath. Once the plane leveled out and we smooth sailed through the clouds, I did chill out. The hum of the engine actually soothed me, and if I didn’t see puffy clouds passing by, I wouldn’t have even known we were off the ground.

  Hours pass with small talk and laughter. Bryce rubs my feet and then picks on how small my pinky toe is. He wiggles it, which drives me mad, so I try to pull my feet away, but he holds tight and starts tickling them until I almost kick him in the face and pee my pants.

  “Okay, okay,” he says. “That was really close.”

  “Hey, you risk that when you don’t let up.”

  He grins. “What happened to your face? Oh, my girl kicked me.”

  I laugh. “That would be fun to tell people.”

  He chuckles. “Nah, I’m good.”

  I pull my feet back and sit cross-legged in the seat, looking out the window.

  “You hungry?” Bryce asks me.

  “Yes.”

  He nods and grabs the black phone. “We’re ready for lunch,” he says and then hangs up.

  “This is crazy,” I say, smirking. I know Bryce has money. It’s no secret with his three homes…well, two now that the loft above Red is gone. His garage is full of classic cars and his closet full of shoes, hats, and expensive suits, but this right here. This is flaunting.

  He’s showing me how loaded he really is, and it’s a lot to take in.

  I’m just an average chick who grew up dirt poor, and I didn’t make a fortune working for Karen.

  I’m doing well now, but that’s because I half-own Mugs & Books. Still, I’d never be eating lunch on a private jet well.

  “Why is it crazy?” he asks.

  “Why? Bryce, we’re on a private jet flying God knows where.” I shake my head. “We come from two different worlds.”

  “No, we don’t,” he says. I think about how he grew up.

  “Okay, not totally different, but your life changed at thirteen. You went from poor to living at Grant Ranch, and I don’t think I need to tell you how awesome that is.

  “You have a lot. You have it all,” I say in wonder. I hope he doesn’t think I’m shallow for saying that. His money isn’t what I want. I fell for the man before I knew he owned a nightclub and had all of this. In some way, I fell for him the moment I saw him on that staircase. I mean, it was obvious. It was the reason I couldn’t stop thinking about him and the reason why I left with him. Breakfast in the middle of the night will always make me think of my guy.

  Bryce leans back in his seat. Lifting his hat a tad, he looks at me, his expression unclear. His eyes are tight, and they dart toward the window. “It could all be yours, too,” he says lowly before looking back at me to see if I heard him.

  I smirk, not thinking more into that statement than I need to.

  Even though I have.

  I’ve wondered what it would be like to have his last name, his ring on my finger, but that will ne
ver be something I push.

  Ever.

  “Just give me Mugs & Books and I’ll be happy.”

  “Done. It’s yours.”

  I roll my eyes. “You’re crazy.”

  “I’m serious. When we get back, I’ll sign it over to you. It’ll be yours completely.”

  “I told you I would buy you out. Until I get up the money, you’ll own half.”

  This time he rolls his eyes. “Whatever,” he says, clearly unhappy with my response. The flight attendant comes from the back with a cart and we stop our conversation.

  We eat lunch and have a beer while watching Rocky, and because I woke up before the sun, I eventually curl up and take a nap.

  _______________

  “K.” I hear. “We’re about to land.”

  I blink my eyes open and stretch out my legs. “Oh my God, I slept so well.”

  He laughs. “Yeah, you snored well, too.”

  I hit his arm. “I do not snore.”

  He lifts his brow.

  I blush. “Do I really?”

  He grins. “Nah. Come on. Put your seatbelt back on.”

  I exhale dramatically and sit up as the plane starts to descend. Clicking my belt into place, I look out as we go lower.

  “Where are we?” I ask, hoping he’ll tell me now.

  “It’s killing you, isn’t it?”

  “Yes. I want to know.”

  “You’ll see soon enough.” He gives me a wink.

  I groan. “Bryce Grant, you’re frustrating.”

  “Ditto,” he replies.

  “Why am I frustrating? I’m not keeping secrets.”

  “You just are.”

  I roll my eyes. “Whatever.”

  The plane touches down, making my stomach flutter, and I look out the window, seeing the tarmac. I focus on some writing I see on a luggage carrier vehicle. “Um, what language is that?” I ask, looking back at Bryce as I point out the window.

  “Dutch,” he says.

  My eyes shoot wide. “Dutch?”

  I think on it for a moment. “We’re in Europe?”

  He nods.

  “What part”

  “Amsterdam,” he says.

  “Amsterdam? As in New Amsterdam?”

  “That’s the one,” he replies.

  “You brought me to New Amsterdam? Holy shit.” I unbuckle my seatbelt and stand up, looking out the other side of the plane.

  I hear Bryce laugh.

  “This is insane,” I say. “When you said trip, I mean…I knew we were going out of the country, but I never thought here.”

  “You’re not disappointed, are you?” he asks, looking slightly worried.

  “Bryce, do I look disappointed to you? It’s on my bucket list.”

  “Really?” he asks, now looking smug. “So, I checked a thing off your list?”

  “Yeah. Don’t get a big head about it.”

  He grabs me and brings me closer to him. “I wanna check everything off your list.”

  I lift a brow. “That’s pretty time-consuming.”

  “All we got is time, K. I’m up for the challenge.”

  “How did I end up with you?”

  “I’m the lucky one, baby. Trust me.” He kisses my lips and grabs my ass just as the flight attendant walks in.

  “Are you ready to exit?” she asks.

  Bryce looks up at her, clearly not caring she walked in on him grabbing a hand full of my ass cheek.

  “Yep,” he says. “Let’s get off this thing.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Kathrine

  We head down the highway in a black Town Car that neither of us drives. We sit in the back, holding hands as I look out the window with wide eyes. There’s really nothing to see yet, but I don’t want to miss it if there is. Bryce seems amused by me, but then he did tell me I was funny when we first started hanging out.

  I guess he still thinks that.

  I hold on to his hand a little tighter, a silent thank you for taking me on this amazing journey, and I feel his thumb brush over mine. In a little over ten minutes we come to a roundabout and take the third exit. Moments later, we’re passing over a bridge, and I see a yacht in the canal. The sun glistens over the water like glitter. People ride bikes and we pass by some roses graffitied onto a brick wall.

  Bryce’s phone starts ringing, and he slides it out of his front pocket. “It’s Jace,” he says to me. “’Bout fucking time. Hello?” he answers after he slides his thumb across the screen.

  “Put him on speaker,” I say.

  Bryce rolls his eyes, but does as I ask. I thump him for the eye roll. “Hey, Jace,” I say.

  “Harrison. Where the hell has my brother taken you? I saw you just landed in New Amsterdam on your page.”

  “Yep. I checked in at the airport,” I say with a huge smile in my voice.

  “Sweet, you better smoke one for me,” he says.

  “Smoke one?”

  “Yeah. Get Bryce to take you to a coffeeshop.”

  “Coffeeshop as in a place to buy coffee?”

  Jace laughs. “No. They’re smoke shops. Weed,” he says. “You can’t go there and not visit a coffeeshop.”

  I look at Bryce who shrugs.

  “Have you been here before?” I ask Jace.

  “I’ve been a lot of places. Army, remember?”

  “Right,” I say.

  Bryce shakes his head. “Enough of this shit, why haven’t you answered my phone calls?”

  “Been busy,” Jace replies.

  “Doing what?” Bryce asks.

  “Nothing you need to know about.”

  “Why the fuck not?” Bryce says.

  “Look, you don’t need to know everything I do. Y’all have fun. We’ll talk when you get home. Harrison, don’t let Darrell Downer ruin your time.”

  I snicker at his nickname for his brother.

  “Yeah, fuck you,” Bryce says, but he isn’t being ugly. He lightly grins and hangs up the phone, but I can tell it bothers him that his brother is keeping secrets.

  “Darrell Downer,” I say, picking at him.

  “Don’t start,” he replies, putting his phone up. “I want to know what he’s doing that he can’t tell me.”

  I don’t say what I want to say, because I don’t want to put it in Bryce’s head, even though I’m sure it already is. Jace is messing with Harlow behind our backs.

  But the good thing is, he isn’t getting into any trouble…that we know of anyway. The car comes to a stop and Bryce opens his door. I slide across, getting out behind him. The driver opens the trunk and retrieves our luggage.

  “I’ll carry this up for you, sir,” he says.

  “’Preciate it,” Bryce replies, reaching for my hand and walking ahead. I look around me at the brick buildings and busy streets. There are bikes everywhere, leaned up against trees and bushes, light poles and bike racks.

  He enters a key code and we walk through a brown wooden door into a stone gray lobby. A staircase is to the right of us, and an elevator hangs in the back behind it. We bypass the stairs and go for the elevator.

  “So, no hotel?” I ask.

  “I figured we could Airbnb.” The doors open after he presses the button. I look behind us, thinking we should wait on the driver. “He won’t ride up with us,” he says, stepping inside. I do the same, just before the doors shut.

  “What made you pick New Amsterdam?”

  “The coffeeshops. Duh,” he says playfully.

  I smirk and hit my shoulder against his arm. “Your brother is one of a kind.”

  “He’s something,” he says under his breath.

  We exit the elevator and walk a short distance to another wooden door, but this one is black. Bryce lifts the mat up in front of it and there lays a key.

  “You really planned this out,” I say as he opens the door for me to walk in first. “Private jet, Town Car, Airbnb. I mean, you got it all done.”

  He grins. “I’m glad you’re impressed.”

&n
bsp; “I am,” I say, taking in the gorgeous apartment.

  “Wow.” A light brown leather sofa sits proudly in the center of the living room. Several feet away is an in-wall, contemporary, ventless fireplace. It’s black stone stretching to the ceiling.

  Across the room on the other side are two sets of French doors with sheer white curtains hanging in front of them. A chair with a side table rests in the back corner behind the sofa, ready for someone to occupy it with a good book and a cup of coffee.

  I turn back and walk through to the kitchen, passing a staircase that leads up. Stainless steel appliances, with black stone countertops that match the fireplace in the living room. I hear Bryce talking to the doorman as I continue my exploring.

  Heading up the spiral stairs, I hit the second floor and a smile spreads across my lips when I enter into the master suite.

  A king-sized bed with a thick baby blue comforter sits in the middle of the room, and across from it are floor-to-ceiling windows with a French door to the far side.

  White interior shutters cover the windows, and right now they’re open, letting in the sunlight. The room isn’t big in width, but long in length, so the bed is only feet from the shutters.

  I walk over and look out. The canal is across from us and houseboats are parked up and down, like cars on a street.

  “I see you found the bedroom.”

  I turn to see Bryce standing at the doorway watching me. “Creep,” I say playfully. I smile at him. “Can’t imagine what made you pick this place.” I look back at the windows.

  He laughs. “I got a thing for these windows, don’t I?”

  “Seems that way.”

  He walks over and looks out, too. “Good view.”

  “Yeah,” I agree, looking at a man walk across the deck of his boat, and out of nowhere I’m lifted up and slammed down onto the bed.

  “Jesus Christ,” I say, my heart beating erratically. “A little warning next time.”

  “That’s for calling me a creep,” he says, climbing over me, his hands landing beside my ears.

  “I wasn’t lying.”

  “It’s not creepy to stare at your woman.”

  “Who says I’m your woman?”

  He frowns. “Don’t fuck with me, K.”