Can't Just Be His Friend

by Tina Martin

  “Nah.”

  “You have any children?”

  “No.”

  “You ever been to jail?”

  Derrick smiled. He already knew the deal.

  Reggie was drilling my man. I discreetly tapped Reggie on the leg underneath the table so he could stop the questioning, but he grabbed my hand and interlocked our fingers. So there Reggie and I sat, holding hands underneath the table while I was sitting next to my boyfriend who was answering all of Reggie’s questions.

  “Nah, man…never been to jail.”

  I could have interjected, but I didn’t see the need to. Derrick could handle his own and I didn’t want to come off as if I thought otherwise.

  I saw our waitress coming over. Finally, I could breathe normally knowing there wouldn’t be any more questions from Reggie, at least while the waitress was over here.

  “What will we be drinking tonight?” she asked, as if she could use a drink herself.

  “Bring us two bottles of your most expensive Chardonnay,” Derrick told her.

  Reggie sneered to himself but I heard him, and I tried to jerk my hand away from him but he squeezed harder so I couldn’t get free.

  “Okay,” the waitress said. “I’ll be right back.” She ran off to get the wine.

  Derrick put his left arm around me (Reggie still holding my hand) and said to everyone, “It’s been five weeks for us now.” Then he looked at me and buried his lips in my cheek.

  “Congratulations,” Patricia and Mom harmoniously said together. Reggie didn’t say anything.

  Derrick went on, “Thank you, and Tiffany, I want to say that the last five weeks with you have been incredible. I eat, sleep, and breathe you and I look forward to many more months, hoping months turn to years.”

  “Awww,” Mom and Patricia sung, looking like they were witnesses to the happy ending of a chick flick.

  I smiled wide, and said, “I feel the same way about you.”

  He smiled at me, gave me a peck on my lips. Reggie still had my hand in his, but didn’t say a word through all of this.

  “I bought you something.” Derrick reached in the right pocket of his jacket and took out a box. I opened the box to reveal a diamond necklace, sparkling under the low lights in the restaurant.

  “Thank you, Derrick…it’s beautiful.”

  “Not as beautiful as you, baby.”

  Mom and Patricia said, “Awww,” in unison again. I had to pass the necklace across the table so they could get a better look.

  That’s when Reggie let go of my hand. He wasn’t participating in the excitement of the night. He didn’t congratulate us, no well wishes – it was almost like he wasn’t even there.

  Then out of nowhere he said to Derrick, “You do this to all the women you date? Wine and dine ‘em to get what you want?”

  Derrick was floored by his insinuation. So was I.

  “Reggie, what are you talking about?” I asked him. I had to jump in this time.

  “No baby. I’ll handle this,” Derrick said smoothly. Then he asked Reggie, “What do you think I want from Tiffany?”

  “Why don’t you tell me?” Reggie shot back.

  I was speechless, in shock, temporarily paralyzed at the way Reggie lashed out to him. By the look on their faces, Mom and Patricia were just as shocked as I was.

  “I want to have a long-term relationship with Tiffany, but you seem to have a problem with that.”

  “You’ve only known her for a month and you already throwing diamond necklaces around and ordering expensive wine. And how old are you anyway, dude?”

  “Reggie, that’s enough,” I told him. “I invited you here to get to know Derrick.” I had to put an end to them going back and forth. It wasn’t right and I couldn’t believe how disrespectful Reggie was being.

  “Well I know all I need to know. I’m out.” Reggie pushed away from the table, spilling some water.

  “Reggie.” I called out to him but he kept on walking.

  “Let me go and get him,” Patricia said.

  “No, Pat. I’ll go,” I said. “I’m so sorry, Derrick. I’ll be right back.”

  I got up from the table and hurried to catch up to Reggie before he jumped in the truck. I caught him by the front entrance to the restaurant.

  “Reggie,” I called to him but he kept walking. “Reggie!” I called him again. This time, he stopped. “What’s your problem?” I yelled at him.

  “I don’t like that guy,” he said in a monotone.

  “Oh, and you know that after twenty minutes. You didn’t even give him a chance!”

  “Why are you yelling?” Reggie asked, yelling even louder at me.

  “Because of the tirade you started in the restaurant! What? Was I the only one there? Hello? You started questioning Derrick like he’s a criminal. Come on, Reggie.”

  “Look, I don’t like the guy, okay. It’s as simple as that. The man is trying to run game on you.”

  “He bought me a gift. What’s so wrong with that?”

  “A diamond necklace, Tiff? A diamond necklace? Then he gonna sit up there and try to floss by ordering some expensive wine like he’s a baller or something.”

  “He was just trying to be nice by ordering the wine for everybody. And as for the necklace, you tellin’ me you never bought something for your girlfriends?”

  “I have but—”

  “So what’s so strange about Derrick buying something for me? Hunh?”

  “I don’t like him, ah’ight?”

  I was furious. An answer like that was sure to make me go insane. I hated it when I asked somebody something and they gave generic answers without explaining the true meaning behind their feelings. And he could have at least stayed in the restaurant and endured the two hours, or less, that we were having dinner. But nooo. Mr. Hothead wanted to get up and bounce and get all psycho on a sister. I had to flip the script on him.

  I told him, “You know what Reggie…I didn’t like Erica, Jasmine, Gwendolyn, Yolanda, Tamika or Mya and I don’t like Shontay, but every time you wanted me to go hang out with you, I was there! It didn’t matter which chick you were dating at the time, I was there, not because of them but because I love you and I wanted to make you happy. Why can’t you do the same for me?”

  I felt like crying but I kept it all in. Besides, I had Derrick, Patricia, and my Mother sitting in The Olive Garden waiting for me to come back in, so I had to keep my composure. So I left him out there and I walked back into the restaurant with my head up, ready to be pretentious and act like everything was cool.

  “I’m sorry, Derrick,” I told him before I sat.

  “Don’t worry about it, Tiffany.”

  “Tiffany, I’m sorry,” Patricia told me, but it wasn’t her fault. She couldn’t control Reggie no more than I could. “You want me to go and talk to him?”

  “No Pat. I talked to him. I don’t think he’s coming back in. So let’s just enjoy our dinner.”

  Derrick managed to work up a conversation while Mom and Patricia stared at him like they both wanted to tear into him. Who knows? One more glass of wine and they probably would jump across the table to get him.

  Reggie didn’t come back in, not that I expected him too. But he had it coming. I wasn’t done with him yet. I still couldn’t believe all the horrible things he said to Derrick.

  And speaking of Derrick, he was a man about the whole thing, a perfect gentlemen. But I knew he was a little ticked off. I would’ve been too. I just didn’t know how he would express his disappointment with Reggie’s behavior. I was soon going to find out.

  I hugged Mom and Patricia in the parking lot in front of The Olive Garden. Then Derrick and I got into his whip and drove off. I was dreading the ride home. I didn’t want to have to do a lot of explaining to Derrick for Reggie’s temperament. I just didn’t want to do it.

  “So, what was that?” Derrick asked, all calm and collected, as soon as we exited the parking lot. He didn’t seem mad at all, just conversational.

/>   “I’m sorry, Derrick. Reggie is just overprotective of me at times.”

  “And you’re cool with letting him control you like that?”

  “He’s not controlling me. He just has very strong opinions of the choices I make. That’s just how he is and I guess I have to be cool with it. And in his defense, you are my first boyfriend.”

  “And last,” Derrick responded with a smile on his face. I smiled for two reasons. One, I was relieved that we weren’t talking about Reggie any longer. Two, Derrick’s confidence and swagger was impressing me a lot. I loved it when he talked that way, like he already knew he had me, certain he was winning me over though I hadn’t given him any indication he had this relationship in the bag.

  “You seem sure of that,” I told him.

  He smiled again and took my left hand into his right. “I am.”

  He parked in front of my apartment, slipped the car in park and said, “So I’ll see you later?”

  “Actually, you can come in for a few minutes if you would like.”

  “Okay.”

  We walked hand-in-hand to my front door. I unlocked the door and pushed it wide open. Derrick followed me in, took off his sports jacket and sat on the couch. I sat next to him. Then he took a picture off of my coffee table. It was a picture of me in a dark green two-piece bikini with my legs wrapped around Reggie and he was holding me up with his hands on my rear, my arms around his neck.

  “The last time you were here, I saw you looking at that picture.”

  “Yeah…I like the way you look in that swimsuit.”

  “Thanks.”

  “So you and Reggie are really close, huh?”

  “Yep. And Derrick, I am soo sorry about tonight.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I just hope you have enough room in your heart for the both of us.”

  “I think I can handle it.”

  “You sure about that?”

  “Yeah. Why?”

  “I want to make sure you can because I am falling in love with you.”

  I really wasn’t expecting to hear that so soon. He dropped the ‘L’ word on me. I knew he was feeling me, but wow. Falling in love…

  He inched closer to me and took my hand into his. Then he kissed me innocently on the cheek. I wanted to tell him I loved him too, but I wasn’t sure. I had to be sure of it to speak it.

  “Well let me get going before you start something up in here,” he jokingly told me, but I’m sure he wondered why I hadn’t said I loved him.

  “Okay.”

  I opened the door to let Derrick out and to my surprise, there was Reggie standing there like he was about to knock. I guess he couldn’t make up his mind what he was going to do when he saw Derrick’s car out front.

  “Reggie, what are you doing here?”

  “I need to talk to you,” he said in a somber tone.” He didn’t even so much as look at Derrick.

  “Okay. Go on in. I’ll be right back.”

  I sent Reggie in quickly. He didn’t like Derrick and I didn’t want them to get into a verbal altercation over me…again.

  I walked with Derrick to his car. We embraced for a moment. Then Derrick asked, “Do you want me to stay while he’s here?”

  “Oh no…Reggie just wants to talk.”

  “If he lays a hand on you…”

  “Derrick, Reggie won’t hurt me. He’s not like that.”

  “All right. I’ll call you in the morning. Okay.”

  “Okay, Derrick.”

  “Goodnight, beautiful.”

  “Goodnight.”

  When Derrick peeled his arms off of me I saw Reggie standing at my door staring at us. I went ahead and gave a final bye to Derrick, then waved him off.

  Chapter 9

  Now it was time for me to turn my attention to Reggie. I was ready to snap on him for actin’ a fool at dinner.

  As soon as I walked through the door, I was at him. “Reggie, what on earth is wrong with you?”

  “I’m sorry. I know I was a little rough at dinner but—”

  “A little? You practically bit his freakin’ head off! And what about me? You even think about that? How could you leave like that, Reggie?”

  “I was angry, ah’ight. And I know this man isn’t right for you. I know his type.”

  “Oh, so now you judge people you don’t even know?”

  “I’m just saying that—”

  “No…you ain’t saying nothing, Reggie. What you did was uncalled for. You are not my father. I don’t need you telling me who I can and cannot date!”

  “So I’m supposed to sit back and watch this cat use you?”

  “Derrick is a good man.”

  “All I’m saying is, y’all been dating for a month and he’s already buying you jewelry and then just now, you out there hugging up on the dude—”

  “Well, if you weren’t looking out the door, you wouldn’t have known what we were doing, now would you? As a matter of fact, if you weren’t at my apartment you wouldn’t know Derrick was over here.”

  “You know what. You got a point. I’m out. You grown. Do whatever you want!”

  Reggie made a mad dash towards the door.

  “Wait a minute.” I ran after him. “Where are you going?”

  “I’m leaving.”

  That’s how Reggie got to me. He knew I wouldn’t let him leave my house angry. Not to mention we were just getting over the misunderstanding about Shontay. I didn’t want another fight.

  “Reggie, wait.” I took him by the hand. “Can you sit down for a minute?”

  He walked with me to the couch.

  “Reggie, what’s really going on? Why are you so angry?”

  “I just don’t want you to get hurt, Tiffany.”

  “I don’t want to get hurt either, Reg, but how will I ever find love without taking a risk?”

  Reggie stared at me like I was speaking a foreign language and he couldn’t understand my dialect. Maybe the concept of me actually having a boyfriend was tough for him. I thought he would be happy for me, especially since he had Shontay. Now we could double date, hang out and chill together without me always being the third wheel. But that didn’t seem to work. Reggie had grown accustomed to me being the friend he could call anytime he wanted – the friend who was unattached. He was the man who could have the best of both worlds – Shontay as a lover and me as a friend, a best friend. A friend he could call anytime day or night. A friend that was available whenever. A friend who could listen to all of his girl problems because I surely didn’t have any man issues to talk to him about.

  Now it seemed as if he didn’t want me to have a boyfriend. That’s why he formed such a negative opinion of Derrick right out the gate. Derrick was now his enemy as he struggled mentally with trying to share me. It seemed odd that Reggie would be this jealous over the way I spent my time. I would think that the man would be happy for me. Happy that finally, his best friend had someone special in her life to spend her time with. But no. He wasn’t. He was pissed at me.

  Maybe he had good reason to be. But if he wasn’t feelin me like I was feelin him, then why would he be this agitated? After all our years of growing up together, I had never seen him this territorial.

  Reminds me of a conversation we had in our teens. I was at Reggie’s house in his bedroom watching TV while our parents played cards with some friends of theirs. And they didn’t even care that Reggie and I were in the room alone together.

  So there we were sitting on the bed when Reggie told me something I will never forget. He said, “Tiffany, life isn’t worth living if you don’t have love. That’s what I want out of life. I just want someone to love me, the same way you do.”

  I was baffled, didn’t give much thought to what he said then. We were sixteen years old and honestly, I didn’t know teenage boys thought about love that deeply. But Reggie definitely needed love in his life. As a child, he was angry because his father wasn’t around. I think he only met the guy once or twice. He vowed to himself that he woul
d never be the man his father was (or wasn’t) and promised that when he had children, he would take care of them like a father is supposed to do.

  I could relate. I was fatherless too, but I had Mom. I really didn’t yearn for a father figure. Anything I wanted to know, I turned to either my Mom or Reggie.

  Reggie, on the other hand, had no male role model to turn to. So personal things he wanted to talk about and didn’t want to tell his Mom, he would come straight to me.

  He does the same thing now that we’re adults. Any time Reggie needs to vent he comes to me and he expects me to be there for him. That’s just how it is. And Reggie has always been open. He spoke his mind. He wasn’t the type to hold anything back, especially from me. That’s how I knew he wasn’t feelin’ me because if he was, he would’ve just came right out and told me…I think.

  Now, here he sits on my couch, looking like a ready-to-unwrap Hershey bar. Even in the midst of our arguing, I wanted to bite him. He was so fine and when he was angry, he made my skin crawl with satisfaction. It excited me.

  Another thing I know about Reggie is, he wants to be first in my life no matter what. He wouldn’t even care if I was married…in his eyes, he must always come first because I loved him first. How can I argue with that? You would think I could, but it made perfect sense. Every girlfriend Reggie ever had knew from jump that I was number one in his life. He made sure of it.

  Mya, his first girlfriend in college, knew that all too well. One night, her and Reggie were planning on going out to kick it. If I recall correctly, they were already at a local hot spot shooting the breeze. Then I called Reggie. That was the night I fell ill and I called Reggie to tell him I was going to the ER. He left Mya so fast, she probably only saw a glimpse of him leaving. I know because he beat me to the hospital. I ended up being diagnosed with a stomach virus, but Reggie stayed right by my side until I felt better.

  So I can’t fault him for demanding to be number one. I was his number one. He proved that to me time and time again.

  As I sat there next to him on the couch, I remembered all the things this man has done for me over the years and it brought tears to my eyes.