Like a fool, I pulled the laminated menu in front of my face. I froze and counted to ten before lowering it. Would he message me and tell me to stop spying on him? Charge across the road and yank me to my feet? Shout, “What the fuck are you doing?”
But what Jason did was far worse. He glared at me, went back to what he was doing and moved away from the window. Damn him. Now I had to know what I’d done to deserve that. I’d invite him for a drink after he was finished and we could talk this through. Made sense, though each time I pictured his scowl, I wasn’t so sure.
Going over and over things in my head was driving me crazy. I had to know, even if he pummeled me with his fists.
I stood up but a car screeched into a parking space opposite the shop and a guy raced out. Jason went to the door and greeted the man like an old friend. They hugged and walked arm in arm to the back of the shop.
Who that fuck was that? Client or friend? Or something else? My imagination went into overdrive as I pictured them giggling while Jason told the guy about the loser alpha he’d dated and who was now hiding in the coffee shop opposite. And the guy might suggest he’d come over and beat me up. Okay, maybe that’s a tad much. Perhaps he’d just look me in the eye and point out how Jason didn’t want to see me.
I flung money on the table for my coffee and left, avoiding glancing at the shop and hoping they weren’t peering at me over the mannequin’s shoulder. Maybe I was a loser, but I was crushed, and a single tear slid over one cheek.
82
Jason
“Why is George coming back in for a refitting?” I had enough on my plate without playing the twenty-fittings game with a groom-to-be. I understood it was their special day and all, but I took good measurements so it should suffice.
And besides, I was trying not to concentrate on that asshat Rex who was hiding in a coffee shop opposite. It was a free country so I couldn’t stop him, but I wanted to erect a sign saying, ‘Cheaters not allowed.’
“He said things have changed.” Keith made a double-handed motion over his belly.
“You mean, he is...no...he’s pregnant. That’s amazing!” When George and his hubby had come in, they spent most of their time talking about the family they wanted. It had been both adorable and nauseating...more adorable. Of course I thought they had meant after their triple-digit-budget wedding, but then again, babies come when they do.
It wasn’t as if I had planned mine.
“He is. And he is over-the-moon happy. He offered to pay more, but I told him it was fine. Hope that’s okay, boss.”
“Of course.” We only charged people when they were being butts, which again reminded me of the butthead who’d gotten me pregnant and was stalking me.
I stepped outside to greet George, refusing to look in the direction of the café.
“Jason...did Keith tell you?” Unlike me, he had the glow, and I nodded with a smile as he closed the distance between us and embraced me. “I never thought I could be this happy.”
We walked inside, and it took all of my strength not to let Rex know I saw him.
“Thank you so much for doing this. I didn’t realize I’d have a bump so soon, but I guess with twins that is normal.” He could barely contain himself.
“Two babies?” Keith asked, because of course there were so many definitions of twins.
“Two. Crazy, right?” He stood up on the little stool and wobbled, and I held him steady as I was worried he’d fall off. “The wedding is in two weeks so maybe make it a little extra big?”
“I could do that. I can even do the waistband like they do on kids’ pants if you would like—you know, just in case. Or...if you want, we could do the suit very last minute. It’s not ideal, but I don’t really know much about twin pregnancies so maybe that would be better?” Heck. I didn’t know much about pregnancies period, yet there I was…
“I’m thinking just a little loose should be good.”
I decided to ask in an online tailor group I was in exactly how loose. I couldn’t imagine I was the first person to have a groom show up pregnant last minute.
“I’m so happy for you both.” I began my measurements. His clothing had done a really good job covering his little bump, but he would for sure need an alteration on the pattern we used.
“The doctor told us with our ages it might take a while, so we figured we’d get right on it...oops.” He giggled.
“You’re hardly what anyone would call old,” Keith took my scribbled-on sticky note to transcribe it to the order form. “You can’t be much older than boss man here.” He winked at me. Asshat. Or was he an ass-kisser using my youth as a way of complimenting the groom? Either way I think asshat worked.
“Forty this summer.” He patted his belly as I stood, a dizzy spell taking over. Great.
“You all right?” And of course George noticed.
“I just stood up too fast and skipped lunch,” I explained. “And there is no way you are almost forty.”
“Flattery will get you everywhere.”
I held out my arm to help him off the stool the way I always did.
“You nearly topple over and you offer me your arm. I think it should be me offering you. I hear having a baby is like being a superhero.” He posed with one fist on his hip and his other hand in the air.
“I’ve heard that too.”
We said our good-byes, and I couldn’t help but look across the way when I walked him out to see if Rex was still there.
Of course he wasn’t.
And no part of me should’ve hoped that he was, but part of me did.
“Damn cheater,” I mumbled under my breath as I stepped back inside.
“Care to tell me what that was about?” Darn Keith and his supersonic ears and ninja walking.
“Nope.” I walked around him and to the rack where George's order lay. “At least we hadn’t already finished it.” I attempted to divert, divert, divert.
“You’d have made him a new one anyway, especially after he said twins.” Keith was right. I would have. He was a typical-enough size I could’ve sold it as a sample and paid for my supplies and time easily enough. People devoured those like nobody’s business.
“If you want, I can work on this while you get tomorrow's pick-ups ready.”
“Or… I could help you figure this out and you could tell me what the cheater comment meant.”
I gave him my best evil eye. Keith needed to drop it. If I’d wanted to share it with him, I would've. I just wasn’t ready and who knows when I would be.
I’d been so stupid.
“Fine. Don’t tell me.” He started to walk away and stopped to add in a much gentler tone, “But if you ever need to tell me anything, I’m here.”
“I know and thanks.” He would be too. I got so much more when I hired Keith than an employee. In so many ways he was my best friend, even if I wasn’t ready to share everything going on with me just yet.
Keith went to gather the orders and I took out my phone, posting in my professional group about the best way to proceed and worrying that my own pants were looser than they ever were instead of needing adjustments. Food needed to start staying down. The doctor’s office reassured me it was fine...normal even for some people to not gain weight their entire first trimester, but seeing George and measuring his little bump had me worrying all over again.
What if my stress and being overworked are contributing to it? What if I’m picking the wrong foods? What if I am inadvertently hurting my baby? What if I’m not strong enough for all of this?
Please be okay little one. Daddy loves you.
83
Rex
“How is it only eleven a.m.?”
I must have spoken out loud as my assistant stuck his head in the door of my office. “Did you need me, Mr. Soames?”
“No, it’s fine, Mike. Just talking to myself.” He gave me a look and went back to his desk.
Since I’d returned from vacation, the latest office gossip about my change in behavior w
as because I’d picked up a nasty tropical bug, and some of the staff kept their distance. Did they expect me to grow two heads?
But I was heart sick, a term I’d previously reserved for teen romances. That organ buried in my chest ached, and despite having a close, loving family, I’d never been so alone and lonely.
I thrived on my work, and being a perfectionist meant I always wanted everything to be just right. But now the days dragged on. Joy had been squeezed from my life, and I got no pleasure from closing deals or inspecting construction sites.
After checking my phone yet again, I tossed it on the desk and stood at the window eying the busy city below, while sipping a luke-warm coffee. Yuck! But I couldn’t be bothered getting a refill.
My phone vibrated and jumped on the desk, and I spilled coffee on my suit and shirt as I raced to grab it. Colin! Not the person I was hoping to hear from. “Hi.”
“Hey,” Colin’s voice, along with a lot of background noise, was relayed through the phone. “Guess who I saw last night?”
If I had to guess, judging by his tone, my brother wasn’t in a good mood. “Jason?” I blurted out, forgetting I was keeping the break-up—or him ghosting me—a secret. Yeah, that’s what it was. I’d been ghosted.
“No. Why do you ask?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Thought maybe it was something to do with the app.” I changed the subject. “How’s that going by the way?”
“Stop it,” he snapped.
“Okaaaay.” Something’s definitely up.
“Rex, I’m going to be straight with you, and I expect you to do the same for me.”
He was going to ask why Jason and I broke up so I decided to get ahead of him. “Listen, if it’s about Jason and me, I can explain.”
“Really? Really? Because I’m all ears. From what I’ve heard, you have a lot of explaining to do. But you’re my brother, and until I hear it from your mouth, I’m keeping an open mind.”
He must have spoken to Keith. “Look, it was a simple misunderstanding.” I went into great detail about Jason being distant and busy, him thinking I was going on a date and from there to him blocking me. “And I can’t speak to him to sort things out.”
“And that’s it?”
“As far as I’m concerned, yeah. Why?”
“So, the photos on social media were what?”
Shit. Shit. Shit. Fucking Alan and his damned pics. “The pics?” Dread clawed at my chest, and I took deep breaths in and out trying to get enough oxygen into my lungs. Were there other photos I hadn’t seen?
“I couldn’t be bothered looking but the way they were described was ‘intimate’.”
“A drunk dude—the one who invited me to the party—put his arm around me. It’s not as though he grabbed my dick.” Though if I’d hung around the party long enough, Alan may have done just that.
I could hear Colin drumming his fingers on something while I pressed the phone against my ear as I tried to see those photos from Jason’s point of view.
He was annoyed and exhausted while I’d been sunning myself in a tropical paradise. And in the midst of that, he saw those stupid pics. That wasn’t just an oops. It was a fuck-up of epic proportions. My fuck-up, apparently.
A harsh intake of breath flowed through the phone and that feeling of dread crept through me again. “If you have something to say, out with it, Colin.” Jason hated me. And I wasn’t important enough for him to offer an explanation. That was it. I needed my brother to tell me, but the words ‘Don’t say it,’ rattled through my head.
“My understanding is Jason thinks you cheated on him.”
“What the ever-loving fuck?” I screamed into the phone. I’d assumed jealousy, but cheating! No! No! No!
Colin yelled back. “Do not take this out on me. I’m the messenger, and I’m not about to sort out your screw-up.”
How did a minor misunderstanding get so out of hand? “And you know this how? Are you in touch with him? Or is this second or even third-hand information?” I was certain it was coming from Keith but wanted my brother to confirm it.
“Keith. We had drinks.”
“And that’s what he said?”
“He was obviously uncomfortable discussing it, and he skirted around it, not actually saying the C word.”
“The C word?”
“Cheating,” he sighed. “But Rex, why didn’t you tell me any of this? It was weird hearing it from my friend instead of my brother.”
I chewed on a nail while eyeing the coffee stain on my shirt. “Well, I thought I could handle it. And I imagined you teasing me and then worrying and getting our dads involved.”
“You’re an idiot. You know that, right?”
“Probably.” An invisible hand twisted my stomach, and I bent over as pain shot through me.
“You have to deal with this, Rex. I mean, any chance of a relationship is probably screwed, but Jason deserves the truth.”
Great. Just perfect. “I’d love to, but he’s making it incredibly difficult.” I sounded like a toddler kicking his heels against the wall after hearing the word, “No.”
The rest of the day was spent in a daze. I signed documents, wrote reports, and took part in conference calls. It was dark by the time I was done, but as I headed to my car wearing a clean shirt, I was determined to find Jason. Not by going to the shop as it was probably closed by now.
If he’d headed home, I could find him. Jason had walked to the restaurant that first night, and I recalled studying his gorgeous ass as he turned the corner. I’d start there by driving up each street.
Searching for someone at night instead of in bright daylight was not the smartest decision I’d ever had, but I was determined to find him this evening. I refused to let the sun come up on another day where he thought I’d been heartless and cruel. I was a fool, not a cheater.
I left the car and trudged up and down the nearby streets, my stomach empty and grumbling. But a little red car parked in front of a small house had me pause. I’ve seen that somewhere before. Near the shop, perhaps? I dug my nails into my palms as my breathing sped up. And as I got closer, I read the slogan on the side. ‘Jason’s Tailoring: Leaving You In Stitches.’
84
Jason
“Maybe I should get a guinea pig or something.” I climbed into my bed, hugging my pillow. “At least then I wouldn’t feel so alone.”
Which was stupid and the hormones talking, I knew that. But that didn’t change the emotional turmoil that was my existence. I wanted Rex back as stupid as that was because first of all, I never had him, and second of all, someone else did. No part of that shouted wise choice to me.
I’d lived alone for a long time and up until recently enjoyed it. I liked the freedom of being able to come and go as I pleased and being able to cook what I wanted and not worry that a roommate ate the last of my cheese or what have you. I liked not having to make my bed.
And I wouldn’t be alone for long. Soon I was going to have a little one. I glanced around the room imagining where I would put the bassinet or maybe even the crib. There was no sense in putting them far away when I didn’t have to.
Or maybe I should move to a better place.
There were so many things to decide, and my brain wasn’t able to process any of it. So I decided to go to a mindless activity and grabbed my remote control.
I flicked on the television and scrolled through the choices, landing on the Hallmark channel where everyone always has a happily ever after. Ten minutes in I couldn’t stand it anymore, knowing that a happily ever after was not in the cards for me.
I wound up watching an infomercial about pillows.
I was ten seconds from ordering the value pack in three easy payments when there was a knock on the door.
Scratch that—a pounding on my door.
I jumped out of bed, my stomach rebelling and threatening to empty once again.
More pounding.
I grabbed my phone and got it ready in case I needed to call 9-1-1. Peopl
e didn’t bang like that unless there was an emergency.
I half jogged to the door and called out, “Who is it?”
“You’re home.” Rex. It was Rex. Rex who left me before I woke up. Rex who went on vacation with his fiancé while pretending he might possibly may be interested in more with me. Rex who stole far too many of my thoughts when he hadn’t thought twice about deceiving me. Rex, the father of my baby.
Dammit, Rex.
Why was he here? Didn’t he know to leave well enough alone? Or had Keith told Colin who told him? Did it matter? It was the middle of the night and he was at my door.
“Go away, Rex.” I leaned my back against the door, not wanting to chance sneaking a glance out the window, for fear it would make this all harder. Which was the same reason I needed to be strong and not let him in. Not tonight.
When we talked, when we had this conversation, I needed to be prepared and I needed to be able to be the one to leave. Being here, like this, made me too vulnerable somehow. No. Now was not the time. I needed to convince him to leave.
I didn’t even know how he found me although the word Keith came to mind.
Keith and I were going to have words.
“Please. Let me in. Let’s talk this out like adults.”
“Someone missed the train to adult behavior long ago.” And scarily I wasn’t sure which of us that was. I needed to man up and tell him about the baby. But not like this, not in the middle of the night, not through a door, and not...not yet.
“I don’t know what that even means, but please let me in.”
“If you want to talk, you can do it like this.” Yeah, it was fair to say I was the one not being an adult. I could see it, yet at the same time couldn’t pull myself out of it. Whether it was the hormones or the hurt feels, I didn’t know, but I just couldn’t handle things the way I knew I should.
Love at Blind Date Complete Series: Books 1-4 Page 30
