by Alexia Purdy
Darn it if he wasn’t grinning again. And that chuckle… I wanted to scream.
“I make you feel off? That’s good, right?”
Was he joking? I couldn’t believe he was encouraging himself.
“What? No, that’s not a good thing. You’re that crazy soldier who wanted to feel me up in the limo as you took me to your liege. I don’t trust you! Even if you did help me get back to the Glass Sky. You act different every time I see you. I don’t know who you really are. I can’t trust someone like that.” I blew out a breath, afraid I’d said too much. I closed my eyes for a moment, pressing my fingers to my temples.
He slid closer to me and took my hand into his, sliding his thumb over my skin in slow, gentle circles. The sensation made me shiver. I was fire and ice all at the same time, my breath hitching when he pressed his lips to my hand. They were warm and enticing, and I wanted a taste of them. I held back even when I wanted more.
“Star-girl, I pledged to get you out safely. So I did. I’ll never do anything to hurt you. When you say you don’t know who I am, you’re wrong. You know me more than anyone else ever has. I’ve never hidden who I am from you. My persona as Commander requires several distasteful characteristics to maintain the illusion. I act like a jerk so my soldiers are forced to avoid and ignore my actions. It works well to do what I need to do.
“It took me a long time to get to my position in Farlan’s army, and though I hate to admit it, some of the things I’ve been forced to do are absolutely disgusting. I want you to know that I am not that man. I did what I had to do for the rebellion, even if it made me out as a terrible person. When you tried to escape, I knew it was time for me to do something and get you out, or you’d rot away in another cell or in Farlan’s bed. I couldn’t let that happen.”
The room felt smaller, darker even. I couldn’t breathe as I digested what he’d said. It wasn’t easy to accept it, but it made sense to me.
“Are you a deserter because of me?” I asked. I didn’t know why I wanted to know that detail, but I did.
“I honestly don’t know. I left the night I snuck you out. I can only walk around freely because no one knows who I am here. I kept myself out of the public eye as much as I could. Even the soldiers posted outside Farlan’s mansion have no idea who I am.”
“But that means you’re in danger. If someone recognizes you—” I started, but it was his turn to hush me with a finger to my lips.
“Calm down, Star-girl. I usually kept a beard and shorter hair when I worked with the regime. Now I’m going to grow out my hair, and I shaved off my beard.”
“Oh, yeah. I noticed.”
He grinned again. “You did?”
“I mean, it was obvious.”
“Of course.” He flashed a toothy grin and shook his head. Oddly enough, I felt far more at ease with him than I had before. Even in the tunnels when he’d helped me escape, there’d been a great divide between us, yet the journey had brought us closer in some way. It was why I was so upset when he hadn’t returned to see me. Now I realized he had meant to, but his position in the rebellion hadn’t allowed it.
Our food arrived, and as we ate, I watched the groups of people win and lose their rounds of pool and darts. I dipped a scrap of bread into the dip and stuffed it into my mouth, sighing in bliss. The food was divine and just what I’d needed to boost my mood. I wanted to ask Everlee more questions but didn’t want to push him too far. There was so much I wanted to tell him, but the words never came. I stole glances at him while he chewed on his food, always finding his eyes focused on me. The intensity of his eyes made my insides burn. I reluctantly looked away.
I watched one group shoot darts as though there was no tomorrow and drink until some were too drunk to stand and had to be heaved out of there by their friends. I wondered if I’d ever have a trustworthy group of friends to hang out with like them.
“And how is the living arrangement in the townhouse?” Everlee asked, dipping some of his tri-tip into the bowl of au jus. It looked delicious, but I was already getting full off my meal.
“It’s fine.”
“It didn’t seem fine. I felt a bloat of tension in there. Is it not the right fit?”
“What? Living with Farlan’s daughter? It’s the worst fit ever. I couldn’t stand her when I lived in the underground, and now I’m sharing a house with her. She’s too… too—”
“Prim?” He watched me as I frowned.
“I don’t know. She’s from a whole other dimension. Do you know what I mean?”
He blinked at me curiously, as though the statement reminded him of something or someone. “I think I do. I wasn’t always a distinguished commander. I grew up poor on the streets of Lionel. Girls like you and Gigi were beyond my means and out of my class.”
“Oh. I’m so sorry. I hope I didn’t offend you.”
“No, you didn’t. It’s just that I do know what you mean.” He smiled, his eyes twinkling as we chatted.
“I mean, Gigi’s refined and dainty. I’m not, much to the chagrin of my mother. I’d rather work on gadgets and machines and get dirty. She’s delicate, and I guess it makes me think of the whole reason I’m in this mess in the first place. She’s everything I don’t want to be, yet she had freedom to decide her fate. I didn’t.”
“You mean the coupling balls?”
I nodded. “Yes. I was supposed to choose someone to marry. Can you believe that? Marry someone at sixteen? It’s absurd. I didn’t want to marry, but my parents basically gave me an ultimatum to marry or be cast off.”
“That’s unfortunate. I was at that ball briefly.”
“You were?” I straightened, trying to place his face in my memories. “I don’t remember seeing you.”
“Oh, you didn’t. No one ever sees the servants behind the master, but I did enjoy your snub of President Farlan. It was most entertaining.”
My face reddened as I slouched. “You saw that? You know it cost me my freedom.”
“I know, but it made me realize that you weren’t like the other girls. You were strong-willed, stubborn, and so incredibly beautiful. See now, don’t tell me you’re not blushing.”
I was beet-red in the face, but this time, I didn’t feel caught off guard. He was so easy to talk to. How had I not noticed that before? In the tunnels, he’d been focused on the task at hand, but he had let me ask him about things.
Elated and blissfully full of food, we readied to leave the pub. We slid out of the booth, and he helped me slip my coat on. His chivalry and kindness were far more apparent now that I’d spent more time with him. I liked it.
As I tugged my gloves on, I felt a sudden rush of devastation hit me. I didn’t want to leave this small little bubble of serenity and laughter. It was the most relaxed I’d felt in a long time. I dreaded returning to the safe house with every bone in my body. It wasn’t my house nor could ever feel like home. I wanted to return to my cavern underground more than anything, but most of all, I didn’t want the night to end.
I slipped my gloved fingers through his, allowing him to lead me out through the labyrinth of people all vibrantly animated with their friends. The music blared in the background as glasses clinked and cue balls cracked across the pool tables. No one took notice of us at all. I loved the atmosphere, feeling safe and exhilarated. The energy was infectious, and I hated leaving it behind as we headed out into the chilly night air.
“Commander—” I began.
“Please don’t call me that.”
“Oh, sorry. Everlee—”
He hushed me again, shaking his head.
“No. Don’t call me that either, Star-girl.”
I stared at him in confusion as we paused outside under the streetlight. I shivered as the cool night wind began to penetrate my clothes. “What do I call you then?” I asked.
He turned and pulled me to his chest before he proceeded to wrap his strong arms around me. I didn’t object or pull away this time. The warmth slipping from him was enough to stave off
the cold as he tucked my hair into my hood and pulled it snug. I breathed a sigh of relief. I liked him fussing over me. It’d been a long time since anyone had done that.
“Call me Gideon. That’s my given name.”
“Gideon,” I whispered. Peering up into his dark, fathomless eyes, I knew they were dangerous. If I wasn’t careful, I would easily lose myself in them. His lips loomed close as a delicious heat wrapped around me. He smelled so good. I wanted to stay that way forever. A tiny part of me hesitated and wanted to run as far away as fast as I could, but another, stronger part never wanted the moment to end.
“What are you thinking about, Star-girl?”
I dreamily admired him as I pressed against his body. “It’s strange… I kind of missed you. Are you going to disappear again?”
He grinned, his white teeth flashing in the night. “Nothing could keep me away from you ever again.” He pressed his lips gently to mine with a sweet, warm kiss. “I promise.”
Chapter Sixteen
Gideon
I leaned on the railing, looking across the Glass Sky City and watching the passersby weave their way through the crowds on their way to work. Keeping my eyes peeled for one person in particular, I sipped my coffee to warm up and wipe away the sleep from my tired body. I wasn’t a huge early riser, but I knew someone who was and would need the second cup I’d brought.
A flash of dark red hair caught my attention, and I perked up. I rushed toward the staircase leading to the lower level packed with workers heading to their early morning jobs. I waited for the crowd to part slightly before sliding into its momentum. Like a river, it was hard to go against the flow. I expertly dodged people, making my way to a dainty red-headed girl who was doing her best to avoid the rush of people as well.
“Star,” I called out to her, and she turned around, smiling as she found me in the crowd. She moved to the side and into a small building alcove where we could avoid getting trampled.
“Gideon. What are you doing in this neck of the woods?” she asked.
“I couldn’t sleep. Here, some fuel for the early shift?” I held out the second steaming cup of coffee, glad the crowd hadn’t knocked it from my hand.
She beamed, taking the cup from my grasp. “Thank you. You must’ve heard me muttering to myself how much I wanted some caffeine to wake me up.” She twisted off the lid and inhaled. “Ah, mocha with extra espresso!” she blew on the hot beverage before taking a cautious sip.
“I thought you might like the extra shots. I needed a boost too.” I held my cup up, and we both laughed. “The truth is, I wanted to see you again. I know you’re really busy with projects, and they need you since there aren’t that many mechanics in this place.”
“Oh, you wanted to see me, huh?” She fluttered her eyelids, a playful smile on her lips. “Well, here I am. What’s on your mind?”
My face surely reddened as I scratched the back of my head, suddenly at a loss for words. I’d been so confident the night I’d taken her out for food at the pub, but somehow, being here in her domain while she headed to work, I was at a loss for words. The fact that she looked gorgeous in work coveralls, with her hair tied back and no makeup in sight, didn’t help.
“Um, I was wondering if you wanted to get some lunch today? Or breakfast. Wait… dinner. I’m sure you work through lunch, don’t you?” I cleared my throat, kicking myself for sounding so ridiculous.
Her smile grew larger, brightening her face as her cheeks flushed pink. Her lips were pouty as she listened to my stammering. I wanted to lean in, scoop her into my arms and kiss her over and over again. One taste of those lips, and I was hooked. I’d dreamt about kissing her again since that night.
“I do usually work through my lunch, but you know what? I’m tired of finding dirt or engine grease on my sandwiches. How about you meet me in the gardens? There’s a nice gazebo with benches I love to sit at when I need a hit of nature. I can take an hour off for lunch at say—” She glanced at her watch, a banged-up old timepiece I was sure she’d constructed herself. It looked like it could take a beating and kept on ticking. “Let’s say at noon. Is that good?”
I nodded, watching her take another sip of her coffee.
“Mm—I’m so glad you got me the large size. I didn’t sleep well.”
I furrowed my brows at this. “Why? Bad dreams?”
She watched me as she warmed her hands on the coffee cup. “No. I mean, kind of. Just things I’ve been through catching up to me. Too many bad moments I choose to suppress come flooding back in my dreams. I probably need therapy or something.” She sighed, closing her eyes for a moment. There were slight circles under her eyes, but she hid her fatigue well. No matter what, I would always think she was beautiful.
“The underground has several councilors who are schooled in psychology. You should talk to one of them. It can help a lot. Trust me, there is no shortage of mental anguish in this place or aboveground. Getting it off your shoulders would be a relief.”
She smiled again, making my heart hammer more quickly. I reached out, pushing back a single lock of soft, auburn hair which had broken free from behind her ear. I swore I could feel her shiver beneath my touch. I grinned at this, knowing she was as affected by me as I was by her.
“Thanks for the suggestion. I’ll head over there on my next off day, see what they suggest.”
“I’m glad to hear that.”
We stared at each other for a few more seconds, but I wanted it to last forever.
“Well….” She tore her eyes away from me, glancing at the crowd. Something passed over her face before she spoke again. “I have to get to work. My list of stuff to repair is always miles long. I’ll see you at lunch, okay?”
I nodded, watching her wave goodbye and slide effortlessly back into the flow of bodies passing by. Her absence had already dampened my spirits, but I brushed it off, knowing that I would see her gorgeous face again at lunch. I wondered what she’d like to eat. She seemed to be the kind of girl who wasn’t picky. I wondered if this was because of the time she’d been in Farlan’s prison. I knew they’d fed her there, but I also knew there’d been some days where they’d fed her very little when they thought she’d been gaining too much weight.
I frowned at this. I hated that she had suffered so much in her short life. I wanted to protect her, and I felt like a failure for not being able to snatch her out of that horrid prison sooner rather than later. I hated myself for not being able to avoid taking her to Farlan in the first place. We’d been surrounded by Insurgents in the car driving to the mansion. I’d had no access to her whatsoever after that. Not until she’d attempted her own escape and had fallen into my arms, drugged by Clyde.
He'd done himself a disservice, but he’d inadvertently given me the chance to escape with her under the guise of going to the infirmary. I bet no one, not even he, had seen that coming.
The river of people continued, and I looked for an opening to join the current. I slipped into the stream and rushed off toward the Commons. I had some meetings to attend that morning. Drinking the rest of my coffee, I knew I would need it to get through some of the monotony the day promised me. If only I could spend the entirety of it with Star, that would’ve made it a whole lot better.
When lunch came around, I was in an intolerable mood, rushing to the gardens with a bag of Chinese food leaking in my hands. The last meeting hadn’t gone well. They’d spoken of me somehow returning to the Insurgents, and I had to come up with a plan. I told them I didn’t want to go back, that I’d done my time with them and given the rebellion a part of myself which I could never get back. It had been a dark time, and I swore I’d die before I returned.
Even so, if I wanted to serve the rebellion, I would have to go back. The way things were going topside, I had little recourse. Cursing under my breath, I wove through the rose garden and then past the vast rows of strawberries woven through lattices and dangling down in vines. I rarely went to the gardens, even though it was the crown jewel of t
he Glass Sky. There were parks filled with grassy fields and playgrounds for the kids, and produce and vegetable patches so large that I didn’t know how they kept it all growing in this dark cavern. The massive dome over the greenhouse kept the warmth from the grow lights on the vegetation. A misting system covered everything with a wet sheen. I knew instantly why Star loved it there.
Finding the center gazebo was no easy feat. The whole greenhouse was massive, full of vegetation. Apart from the walkways, trees, grasses, and bushes of all types covered every square foot. It felt like a labyrinth as I walked the paths leading through the place. The calls of birds and frogs echoed in the dome, and for just a moment, I could believe I was topside, not in a dreary cavern.
“Gideon!” Star waved me over from the gazebo, nearly hidden by the leaves and vines of climbing plants. It had the perfect camouflage. I took a deep breath. The air in this part of the gardens was filled with the scents of magnolia and honeysuckle, sweet yet pungent in a pleasant way. I hoped my frustration didn’t show on my face. I couldn’t let the stress of my work get me down. Not with Star. Not ever.
“Hey!” I greeted her, giving in to her hug as she threw her arms around my middle. She was just a bit shorter than me, which I loved. I wanted to lift her up and spin her around, let her remember to always be young at heart. I needed to feel that way too. Enough of this mission-focused life full of danger and stress. I held up the bag of food. “I hope you like Chinese. The other places were packed to the brim.”
“Mmm! I love Chinese food. It’s the best!”
Relieved, I smiled. “I’m so glad you’re not picky. I nearly froze after asking you to lunch and not asking you what kind of food you liked. If you hate it, you don’t have to pretend.”
Throwing me an incredulous look, she laughed. “Are you crazy? I love food. All kinds. Trust me, my mother tried to keep me from pigging out, always complaining as she fought to tighten my corsets until I could hardly breathe. What can I say? I love to eat. It was like she hated to eat so much. I couldn’t stand her steamed veggies and water diet. Ugh.”
