Surviving Emma

by Jen Atkinson

  Keith shoved his hands into the pockets of his slacks. “Well, should we go to dinner?”

  “Pizza!” Dakota sang, showing a few signs of life.

  “I thought we could go to the steakhouse. I’m a vegetarian now. I think they’ll have more options for me.” He grinned, too toothy for Keith to be real. He slid a quick glance to Carter.

  “But it’s a steakhouse.” I set a hand on one hip. We rarely ate out and Dakota had her hopes on Nook Rock Pizza.

  “They have animal heads on the wall,” Carter chimed, knowing as well as I did how excited Dakota had been.

  “Ew.” Kotes scrunched her face. “I don’t think you’d enjoy that place.”

  Keith crouched down to meet her eye level. “Give it a try? For me?”

  Beaming, she nodded. He held out his arms and she scrambled into them for a quick hug.

  I glanced back at Carter, almost as if to say, I told you so. See—he ruins everything.

  Dakota and I slipped into our coats, while Carter stood there like our butler, a dishrag tucked into his waistband.

  “Hey,” I said, peering at him and knowing I’d feel better if he were with us, “wanna come?”

  “Yeah, Carter, come with us.” Kotes waved him on.

  “Oh, I was kind of hoping the three of us—” Keith started and then Carter saved him—even though he didn’t deserve to be saved.

  “Nah. That’s okay. The three of you probably need some time. Have fun. I’ll be here when you get back. All right, Kotes?”

  “All right,” she said and turned back to Keith.

  “All right?” he said, but in a way that asked—is this okay? If not, I’ll come. He picked up my hand, laced our fingers, and squeezed.

  “Yeah, all right.”

  “Come on, Dad,” Dakota snagged Keith by the sleeve and led him out the front door.

  “What was that about?” Keith said looking down at her.

  “They just do that sometimes.”

  I sighed, ready for the night to be over.

  “It’ll be okay,” Carter said, letting go of my fingers and cupping my cheek with his hand.

  “Okay,” I lamely agreed.

  “It will,” he said again, then leaned in and pecked the corner of my mouth, sending a few pleasant flutters to my stomach.

  Dakota and Keith stood next to his car, but I heard the tail end of what Dakota said, “…and sometimes he sleeps in Mom’s bed.”

  “Whoa. What are we talking about?”

  “Carter.” Keith’s eyebrows bounced once.

  “He slept in my bed one time Dakota because I had to leave in the middle of the night to pick up your grandpa from the hospital. He came so you wouldn’t be alone.” I darted a quick glance at Keith—maybe what Taggart said had made me sensitive, but I didn’t need Keith to add promiscuous to my list of downfalls.

  “I know,” she said as if my explanation were wholly unneeded.

  We drove to the steakhouse in Keith’s car—a new Honda Acura. How could he afford that and medical school? How much had he sent Dakota for her birthday again?—not enough.

  “So, how is Taggart?” Keith said, keeping his eyes on the road. He knew my father, Tag hadn’t changed in the last seven years.

  So, I chose honesty. “Still alive.”

  He snickered, and the dimple I used to trace with my thumb made its grand appearance. That’s how I knew Keith truly smiled. Mr. Bliss—that’s what I named that dimple all those years ago—would show up with an honest laugh from Keith.

  I thought about the same things every time Keith came back for a visit, like a bad dream revisited. I thought about what he once meant to me, how he’d crushed me when he left, and how he’d never tried with Dakota.

  “I hope they don’t put us by one of the animal heads. I don’t think you’d like that, Dad.”

  “Don’t worry, kiddo. I think we already have a table.”

  “Huh?” How would we already have a table?

  Nervous jitters zoomed around my body, making me sweat. Thank goodness I’d worn something without sleeves. We walked through the doors, and a tall dark haired woman I’d never seen before stood next to a table, far from any heads, waving our way. I looked behind us to find no one, and then Keith waved back.

  “Dakota, I want you to meet someone. Her name is Mindy.”

  “I thought you wanted time—just the three of us?” I said, but either Keith didn’t hear me or he didn’t care to answer.

  “She’s very special to me.” Keith held his hand out to Dakota. “Will you meet her?”

  What could she say with Mindy waving at us fifteen yards away? He could have warned her. He could have warned me! “Keith, is this really appropriate?” I meant bringing some girl along when he hadn’t seen his daughter in more than a year, but he seemed to take my words another way.

  “Yes, it is. This is something serious, so I think it’s absolutely appropriate.”

  Keith and Kotes took the lead and I followed behind them to the round table. Keith motioned to Dakota to sit in the empty seat next to Mindy. So, I took the open seat on Dakota’s other side.

  “Oh, I wanted—”

  I smiled, baring my teeth, and not caring if it looked natural or not. “If you want to sit by your daughter then trade places with your something serious.” I would not be placed between Keith and his girl of the month. But then—Mindy had a ring on. A diamond, that probably cost more than my car, sat tilted to the side on her left ring finger.

  Mindy glanced at me, but like Keith, she didn’t bother a hello for me. She only had eyes for Kotes. “Dakota,” she said, her big smile held two rows of unnaturally white teeth. “I have been so excited to meet you.”

  “You have?” Dakota giggled. “I just learned about you.”

  “I know. Your dad wanted to tell you about me in person.” Mindy winked, her hand on the back of Dakota’s chair.

  I should have channeled my inner yoga and shut my mouth. Silence. But the words just came—like a rolling coaster on a downhill slope; once started, it can’t stop. “That, and he hasn’t spoken to her in months.” He had called a couple times in his year and half absence, but not in the last four months.

  Mindy met me eye to eye. “And you’re Emma?”

  “I am.”

  “I’ve heard about you, too.”

  A grin overcame me—natural as could be. “I’m with Kotes.” I shrugged. “I didn’t know you existed until two minutes ago.”

  “Emma,” Keith barked—reminding me of our pup at home—only less loveable. “Could we…” He jabbed a thumb over his shoulder.

  My breath left me in a gusty groan. I leaned over and kissed Dakota’s forehead. “One minute, baby.”

  “What’s that?” Mindy asked, pointing to Dakota’s book. Man, she was eager to play house with my daughter.

  I stood and followed Keith to a corner.

  “Please, Emma, please don’t be difficult.”

  “I’m difficult? I didn’t realize the truth made me difficult.”

  “Emma,” he said, looking at the floor. “I’m getting married.”

  “I kind of gathered that by the rocky mountain oyster on her finger.” I couldn’t care less if Keith got married—as long as Dakota stayed mine and happy.

  His face soured with my words. “I want Mindy and Dakota to know each other.”

  “That’s rich Keith, seeing as how I can count on one hand how many times you’ve come to visit her. Don’t you want to know her?”

  He pinched his lips. “Medical school is demanding—and I’ve kept in touch.”

  “Right. So you know what her favorite color is? Or her favorite book? Or that when she’s scared at night she likes her feet rubbed?”

  He ran both hands over his head. “I want more time with her—and so does Mindy.”

  “Mindy? This is about Mindy. Are you pretending to be the dad you aren’t?” I crossed my arms, wrinkling the front of my shirt. “Because I won’t lie to make you look good, Prin
ce Charming.”

  “No. She knows I haven’t been back in a while, that’s why she suggested we make this trip. We want Dakota a part of our wedding and a part of our lives.”

  “We or she?”

  “We,” he said, one hand on the back of his neck, the other on the tip of my elbow. “Please be…”

  When he didn’t finish, I left him standing there and came back to Dakota explaining her book to Mindy. Keith followed behind me.

  “Everything okay?” Mindy asked, looking up from Dakota’s book.

  “Yes,” we said in unison.

  My stomach turned, and though we sat down to start this stupid meal, I’d lost my appetite. Dakota found a pizza on the menu for us to share, while Keith and Mindy ate salads and sides of fruit. Keith announced that he and Mindy would be getting married the following August and that they’d love Dakota—and Mindy added me—to come.

  Somehow after an hour of suffering through dinner, I ended up in a car with Mindy—so Kotes and Keith could have a few minutes alone.

  “She’s a great girl,” Mindy said, spinning the wheel at my direction.

  “Thanks.” I didn’t want to attempt small talk. I wanted to go home and to say goodbye to the both of them.

  “You’ve done a great job, all on your own.”

  Maybe Keith had been more honest than I assumed.

  “But you don’t have to be alone anymore,” she said. “Keith and I can help. We can take Dakota on weekends and—”

  “On weekends? You live in Massachusetts.”

  “Well—”

  “Where does your family live, Mindy?” Why couldn’t I say her name without adding an edge to it?

  “They’re in Massachusetts.”

  “So, where is it you two want to settle down? Because I’m not gonna let Kotes get on a plane to fly clear across the country.”

  “Right.” She went quiet and for some reason. The tiniest blob of guilt swelled inside of me. Stupid. I didn’t owe Keith or Mindy any guilt. I didn’t do guilt.

  “I’m not trying to be mean,” I said—and I meant it. “I’m sure Keith’s told you about me. I don’t exactly have a lot going for me in this life, but the one thing I’m good at is protecting Dakota. I will not put her in a position that could cause her fear or pain. I can’t. And the truth is, Keith hasn’t been around her enough for me to feel comfortable sending her off.”

  She nodded. “I know that and I admire you. But he is her father.”

  Oh, I wanted to argue. I wanted to object. I wanted to call it a lie and proclaim Dakota a miraculous conception. But I couldn’t. She’d been honest about Keith’s absence. She knew he wouldn’t be named father of the year anytime soon.

  “So, maybe we start with us visiting her.”

  I sighed. I didn’t want that either. But for Dakota’s happiness, I couldn’t say no.

  Chapter 32

  Carter

  I frosted the cake but left the decorative shiny sprinkles for Dakota. Then I fussed around Emma’s house like my grandma would have done and finally settled onto her couch with the remote when I heard a car pull up—and then another. “Not Taggart.” If I assured Emma that everything would be fine and then Taggart came home drunk at the same time Keith came in for cake, Emma would never trust my word again.

  I went to the cabin’s front window and saw a lanky brunette walking next to Emma. The woman seemed to make Emma stiffen and focus on the cabin door ahead.

  Dakota held Keith’s hand, beaming. “Come sit down,” she told him as they walked inside. “Hi, Carter!”

  “Hey, Kotes. How was dinner?”

  “Good. The steakhouse had pizza and salad, so everyone was happy!” She patted Keith’s knee. “Stay here while I bring you your surprise.”

  “Okay,” Keith smiled for her, but he didn’t look comfortable sitting on Taggart’s couch in this old house.

  “Psst.” I hissed at Dakota. “I left the you-know-what on the table for you.” I winked at her and she grinned until her cheeks resembled ripe apples ready to be plucked from the tree.

  Emma and the woman came in seconds later. “Hey,” she said, and maybe my imagination played tricks on me, but her stiffness seemed to ease just by seeing me. She took the three extra steps into the room until she stood shoulder to shoulder with me. “Carter, this is Mindy—Keith’s fiancé.”

  “Fiancé? Wow.” I looked at Emma—were we happy, unhappy, or indifferent about this? “Congrats.”

  “Ah, this is Carter—my—” She cleared her throat, fiddling with the end of her shirt.

  “Her handy-man, chef, and friend.” I held a hand out to the pretty brunette, hoping I wouldn’t get reamed out for finishing Emma’s sentence when she didn’t seem to know how to.

  Mindy shook my hand, grinning a wide pleasant smile and then slid her gaze to Keith. “Should we ask her?”

  “Ah—well—”

  “Come on.” She tipped her head back and sighed.

  “Ask me what?” Emma said, tensing again.

  “Keith and I are spending the weekend in Jackson.” She rolled her hands as she spoke.

  “I thought you were staying in Dubois. I thought you were going to spend this weekend with Dakota.” Emma set her glare on Keith—and I knew that glare—that glare meant—I’d like to rip you pieces.

  “Well—” Keith licked his lips and sat up on the too soft couch that had sat in Emma’s front room for possibly decades.

  “We want to spend it with Dakota!” Mindy piped. “We want her to come with us.”

  “What?” Emma shrieked.

  I put a hand around her waist, tucking my finger into her belt loop, just in case I needed to pull her back. I’d rather she not claw out Keith’s eyeballs when I had just vacuumed.

  “If we accumulate all of the time you’ve spent with your daughter it may add up to twenty-four hours. Twenty-four—in seven years, Keith, and now you want to take her away for a weekend?”

  “That’s exactly why we need to take her for a weekend.” Mindy walked over to Keith and planted herself next to him, her hand on his shoulder. “Keith should be spending more time with her. He’s sorry he hasn’t been around.”

  “Is he? Because I’ve never heard those words come from his mouth, Mindy.” She said the woman’s name like a curse word. But to Mindy’s credit it didn’t seem to faze her.

  “Who’s ready?” Dakota called from the hallway. How much had she heard? She stepped into the room, both of her hands clutching to a glass plate with a large slice of chocolate cake on top. The thing had been doused in sprinkles—I bet she didn’t leave one colorful speck in that jar. She’d cut out the large slice herself and carefully placed on the platter for Keith. “Ta-da! A chocolate cake! I made it just for you!”

  “You made that yourself?” Mindy asked.

  “Carter helped.” Dakota glowed, looking first to her achievement and then at her dad.

  “Not much, you did all the hard work.” I watched as the fork on her plate teetered.

  Mindy brushed a hair off her shoulder and fluttered her lashes at Dakota. “You are such a smart girl, Kotes.”

  Emma stiffened under my hold at Mindy saying her daughter’s nickname.

  Mindy pointed a long, pink nail at Dakota. “Just like your dad.”

  My arm around Emma tightened and I held her fast against me.

  “Dad was first in his class and Mom was second, so it runs in the family.” It pleased Dakota to say those words. She didn’t often find herself in the same room as both her parents. “Here you go!” She shoved the plate under Keith’s nose.

  “Oh, goodness. That looks great. But I don’t eat chocolate.”

  “Nope,” Mindy wrinkled her nose, “it doesn’t agree with him.”

  Dakota’s brows pinched together. I’m guessing our smart girl tried to figure out how chocolate would argue with her dad.

  Emma wriggled out of my hold and stood next to Dakota, looking down at Keith on the couch. “Your daughter spent the afterno
on not reading her favorite book, but baking her dad a chocolate cake.”

  Mindy and Keith glanced from each other to Emma—unsure what to say.

  But before anyone could say anything, a whine sounded from the hall and a bounding pup came running up to Dakota. Four-legged Keith jumped up on Dakota, knocking the plate and slice of cake to the ground.

  “Eep,” Mindy yipped at the sight of the dog. She moved the toe of her high heel away from the mess.

  “Keith!” Emma yelled, at which her ex recoiled on the couch.

  “What is that?” he asked.

  “Look who woke up?” I bent and scratched behind Keith’s ear. “You about slept the evening away, didn’t you boy?” The dog couldn’t be blamed, Dakota and food were in the same spot—his two favorite things.

  Dakota sighed, but gave her dog a pat as he greedily cleaned up the mess. “Chocolate isn’t good for dogs,” she told him, but he didn’t listen.

  “Don’t worry, Kotes, he’ll be okay, and there’s plenty more. Go grab a dishrag, will ya?” I gave her shoulder a rub and she went on her way.

  Four-legged Keith ran after her, stepping in the mess he’d made and tracking it over the floor.

  “Dang it, Keith!” Emma stomped, her hands forming a fist.

  “Why do you keep yelling at me?” Keith stood from his seat, his arms flailing as if he were about to be pummeled by a bus and couldn’t move his feet.

  “I am not yelling!”

  The room went quiet with Emma’s bellow.

  Dakota ran back in with a wet rag.

  “Sweet girl, go clean up Keith’s paws, will you?” Emma held her hand out to take the wet rag. “He’s tracking cake all over the house.”

  “Sure, Mama.”

  Dakota tapped her thigh. “Come on, Keith. Come on.”

  “You named your dog Keith?” Keith wrinkled his nose.

  “Yes, we did. It seemed fitting, seeing as how he is a pain in the a—”

  “Okay,” I clapped my hands, stopping her speech. I snaked an arm around her waist and pulled her a step and then another away from Keith—for his own safety—before lacing my fingers through hers. “Dakota named the dog and she did it as a tribute to you. You should feel complimented.”