Pervade Montego Bay

by Fewings, Vanessa

  He strolled toward the door and headed out.

  I fell back onto the bed and stared at the ceiling, my heart aching. I felt no regret for kissing him. It had felt right to me and had happened easily between us. I tried to bury the sinking feeling I’d offended him. Or misjudged what he’d needed.

  He kissed me first.

  I’d opened up and made myself vulnerable, and that wasn’t even my first mistake. My first mistake was accepting that mission in Macau when in hindsight, it had clearly been a way to get rid of me.

  James Ballad had saved me then…

  The ceiling fan began to spin, causing a refreshing breeze.

  James stood in the doorway having just flipped on the switch. In his hand was a black bottle of Imperial Rum. He lifted it to his mouth and took a swig, his fascinated stare roaming over my naked body as I lay sprawled on his bed.

  With a shaky smile, I leaned up on my elbows and took the bottle from him when he offered it. I gulped the liquor. It burned my throat. I handed it back and James took another long drag of rum.

  It was easy to admire this man with his toned, naked physique and sculptured body…all conflict and desire and dark beauty.

  “You’re a good man, Xavier.” He dragged his teeth over his bottom lip. “I don’t want to take advantage.”

  “You’re not.”

  His dazzling eyes rose to meet mine. “You want this?”

  I smiled, and let my head crash onto the pillow.

  James

  The heat from the rum burned through me and made me heady. These unfolding moments with Xavier had a dreamlike quality.

  I’d not been intimate with anyone since her. Before, even the thought of it had felt like betrayal, as though even kissing someone else would be like cheating on Victoria. After all these years, moving on still seemed impossible.

  Yet here I was, with this remarkable man, finding the courage to touch him…letting him touch me. It felt dangerous and startling, and yet it made me feel alive again. This erotic exploration was unforeseen; my body yearned for it to continue, even as my mind questioned how far this could go…

  Xavier was like a dark angel stealing all my reason.

  Stealing all the oxygen from the room.

  Don’t fight it.

  It felt so damn good.

  I knew Xavier’s expression—it warned me that if this didn’t happen, he’d be full of regret.

  I stared at his naked, sculpted torso as he heaved breaths of uncertainty. My eyes roamed over the length and form of what lay between his thighs, a hefty cock that was erect. Even that looked beautiful to me. I was opening up to this man, letting him in.

  The walls I’d built inside were being destroyed and my heart was beating once more.

  I set the rum on the nightstand and joined Xavier on the bed.

  He climbed on top of my body, his biceps bulging as he kept his weight off me, brushing his cock along the length of mine…watching my reaction to his pleasurable thrusts below.

  A tight, new tension rose between us.

  This passion felt natural and worthy of this room…turning this lonely sanctuary into something sacred. I rose from the depths of my disquiet and replayed Xavier’s words in my head…he wanted this.

  Before now, my every waking thought had been wishing I could go back in time and have Victoria here, that I could return to the moment when I’d boarded the HMS Majesty. It had taken me to the depths of the ocean, so far from her—for the last time.

  Now, my wants and needs were filled with something new. A sense of hope that came with a new kind of exploration.

  Having Xavier in this room felt right. After all I knew about him, he deserved to be treated with respect. I wasn’t sure I had it in me to give him what he needed, though. If he wanted something permanent, I wasn’t there yet.

  “It’s going to be done my way,” I said, my tone gravely from the rum. “I need to control you, Xavier.”

  “Oh, God,” he whispered.

  I pushed him off, reaching for the rum and offering him more. Xavier shook his head, so I took one more swig and set the bottle on the nightstand before rising and opening the top drawer of my dresser. I pulled out two neckties and carried them over to the bed.

  With an intrigued expression, Xavier watched me secure his right wrist to the metal bedframe, and then I did the same to his left one. He hadn’t resisted at all, and that trust stirred a forbidden yearning inside me. He probably wondered if I’d done this to my late wife. Obviously, I had a thing for kinky sex, but that was a conversation for another time.

  By leaving his feet free, I at least gave him some ability to move—and to resist, if necessary—if what I did to him became too much.

  Wrapping my fingers around his cock, I examined it. This was the closest I’d ever been to another man with this level of intimacy. I traced him, running my thumb along his frenulum. He shuddered beneath me. Continuing, I delivered the kind of pleasure I liked, the fast and steady pump of a fist until a bead of cum appeared on his tip. That same pre-cum glistened on me.

  “I’m going to…,” he said, panting. “Unless you slow down.”

  I sucked on my forefinger to soak it and then lowered it to the puckered flesh of his ass, easing it into him a little. Xavier’s back arched and his muscles clenched around my finger.

  “Relax,” I soothed.

  My erection grew harder and my balls tighter at the sight of me finger-fucking him in the ass. With my other hand, I provided a steady rhythm with my palm around his shaft. This was me showing how much I cared…how much I wanted this to be special. I wanted to bring him blinding pleasure, make him forget his troubles.

  Because forgetting was what we both coveted—what we both wanted was to find a way to make it through another day.

  Controlling another man like this had to be the ultimate thrill.

  I knew how each stroke, each touch, and each brush of my thumb would feel. It would be easy to bring him over.

  “James!”

  “Not yet.” I needed this to go on longer, to become what it promised to be. Our first time a mark of strength and submission.

  His moan of frustration echoed around us.

  I continued even as he clenched around my finger possessively, his breathing ragged, his body shuddering as he wantonly gave himself over.

  I ran my fingers along the ridges of his scrotum, leaving his cock abandoned to build his frustration—just as he’d done to me in the shower. Xavier gritted his teeth as he tried to endure my neglect, his thighs shaking in revolt at my taunting.

  With a fierce hold on his cock now, I stroked him with an iron-clad grip.

  “Harder, Xavier?”

  “Yes, but I can’t hold off.”

  “I don’t want you to. I want to watch.” Squeezing still, I used my hand as a piston to move faster along his shaft.

  Outside, the crickets sang their evening song as nature’s tropical backdrop heightened our senses, providing an exotic ambience to our surroundings, a mystical aura that lent a profound mood to our intimacy.

  Xavier squeezed his eyes shut to cope with the overwhelming pleasure, panting as his expression morphed into wonder. A multitude of emotions flashed across his face.

  He felt like the best kind of escape for me…a way out…a way through. An intense feeling of affection for him rose inside me.

  Xavier Rothschild was the only thing pulling me back from the brink.

  “I’m glad you’re here,” I whispered.

  He shuddered, his body stiffening as he stretched out his limbs to endure the violence of his orgasm. I continued to pump as a fountain spurted in reams, covering his abdomen as he groaned.

  His climax was a thing of beauty.

  Finally, he stilled and his breathing slowed.

  “Thank you for rescuing me from Colchester.” His eyes opened and met mine. “You saved my life. You know that, right?”

  Xavier, you saved me…

  “You’re an extraordinary man,”
I said softly.

  “I was just thinking that about you.”

  “There’s no redeeming me.”

  He arched a brow. “If there’s anyone who has a gift for unlocking a mystery, it’s you.”

  I smiled at him.

  “You okay?”

  I rose from the bed and walked over to the bottle of rum. I took a swig and raised it in a toast. “To you.”

  “No…to us.”

  I gave a nod. “That was beyond…” My expectations.

  “Untie me. I want to touch you.”

  “We should get to work, I think.”

  “No, you don’t, Sir Ballad.” He gave me a seductive smile. “You’re not the only one who likes to be dominant.”

  Xavier

  My mind stilled when James touched me. Hell, it stilled whenever he walked into the same room.

  What we’d done in this bedroom felt like a daydream. In a three-day period, I’d had my life threatened on foreign soil, survived a car crash, and had ended up an anonymous prisoner in jail. Now, life had turned into something phenomenal thanks to this incredible man. Within an hour of arriving in his home, we’d been rolling between the sheets.

  It was me now between his thighs, giving him what was probably the best blowjob of his life. His short, sharp breaths and rigid body proving I had him rising fast toward a climax. I slowed down so I could savor this experience.

  Flicking my tongue along his tip, I teased him as I held his stare.

  “I might have fantasized about this,” he admitted.

  “I’ve wanted you from the first moment I met you on the sub,” I said. “It was the combat gear.”

  “I’m flattered.”

  “You’ve never been with a man before?”

  “No. And don’t stop.”

  I smirked, knowing I was about to blow his mind, too. I began to deep-throat him, sucking as I drew back along the length of his cock. James would feel the pleasure surge as the intensity increased.

  I watched with satisfaction as he closed his eyes and began to pant. He came hard, shuddering and yelling through the blinding orgasm as I swallowed his cum—increasing the pressure with a suck-pull of my cheeks.

  His ragged breathing filled the room as he tried to recover.

  I fell onto the bed beside him. We lay on our pillows staring up at the ceiling. He shook his head as though stunned we’d made our way to this point of intimacy.

  A few minutes later, I slipped away to take a shower. I returned with a towel wrapped around my waist. James was still naked and sprawled out on the bed. He welcomed me back with a drop-dead gorgeous smile.

  It was going to take hours for us to come down from this high after our mind-shattering sex. The fogginess from the rum made everything that much more dreamlike.

  “Hey,” he said, patting the space beside him on the bed, inviting me to rejoin him.

  I exhaled in a rush of relief that he showed no regret.

  “How are you feeling, Xavier?”

  “I should ask you that.”

  God, the things he did to me with just his voice. I imagined he’d once driven women crazy with that suaveness. Though something told me the weight of his grief might have prevented him from moving on.

  I smiled, and climbed into bed beside him. “You know this place is like paradise, right?”

  “Yes,” he said, beaming. “I grew up here.”

  “Oh, how you suffered.”

  “Spent some time in England, too.”

  “That’s right.” I rolled onto my side to look at him. “You own Argyle Castle.”

  “You know a lot about me.”

  “I did my research.”

  “Seems like an unfair advantage.”

  “No worse than you living in a castle.”

  “It’s freezing in winter.”

  “You prefer Jamaica?”

  “How can I not? When I was a kid, I’d borrow my mum’s boat and sail off.”

  “She let you do that?”

  “She didn’t know. I wouldn’t go far. It was just enough to give me the independence I wanted.”

  “Then they sent you to a school in England?”

  “Yes, which was an interesting experience.” James looked over at me. “Tell me about your time at MI6?”

  “Wasn’t there long. I arrived right out of Sandhurst. Once they learned I had unusual tech skills they transferred me to GCHQ.”

  “Unusual tech skills?” He studied me.

  “Most people don’t understand what I do.”

  He looked thoughtful. “I arrived at MI6 just after you left. I know most people over at GCHQ. They kept you a secret.”

  I grinned at him. “I think we’d have gotten on.”

  “Doubt it.” He winked.

  That little show of affection caused a shiver to run through me. “We definitely wouldn’t have ended up in bed together.”

  He ignored that. “I’m glad it was me who brought you in from Macau.”

  “Me too.”

  “Though nothing adds up.”

  “Tell me something. Would you have killed me out there if I’d tried to run?”

  “That’s classified.”

  “I’m serious.”

  His dark eyes found mine.

  “Better not to know, right?” I tested him.

  “I should have been more decent to you.”

  “How did you find me in Colchester?”

  “Someone told me you were in a military prison.”

  “Kitty Adair?”

  He looked impressed. “She was worried about you.”

  “I always did like her.”

  “Obviously, she likes you back.”

  “Only because I remember her birthday.”

  He was quiet for a few moments, and then said, “Why do they fear you, Xavier? What did you do to make them feel threatened?”

  “Most people look at me with disbelief when I tell them. I’m a top-secret issue.”

  “I’m not most people.”

  “I communicate with AI.”

  James looked puzzled. “How do you mean?”

  “I can show you later if you like. If you need proof.”

  His frown deepened as he realized the implications. “You have access to anything online.”

  “Anywhere, anytime—the world is an open door. It’s a bit like The Matrix, only without Agent Smith riding my ass.”

  “You do have a nice ass, by the way.”

  “Thanks. So do you.”

  He suppressed a smile. “Go on.”

  “I can control everything…traffic lights, cameras, personal computers, phones…”

  “You influence national security.” James looked impressed.

  I shot an amused glance over his naked body. To be sufficiently impressed, a person had to look no further than Ballad. It was hard to stop staring at him.

  He climbed out of bed and rummaged around in a drawer, pulling out two pairs of boxer shorts and two white T-shirts.

  “Hungry?” he asked.

  “Famished.”

  We got dressed and made our way downstairs, heading for the kitchen.

  He opened the fridge and pulled out a pre-prepared dish. “You haven’t lived until you’ve tasted Jamaican cooking. I’ll add some rice and peas when this is done. It’s jerk chicken.”

  “Who made that?”

  “I have a housekeeper who takes care of the place when I’m away. She always prepares this recipe when I come into town.” He strolled over to the oven and turned it on.

  This domesticated version of Ballad made me smile.

  “Can I do anything to help?” I asked.

  “Just relax.”

  I sat at the kitchen table and James prepared a quick snack for us—some cheese and crackers.

  The smell of cheddar made my mouth water. I munched on the delicious snack and washed it down with iced tea. “I could get used to this.”

  “I’m glad you feel that way. I have a hard time relaxing.” He too
k a sip of his drink. “Victoria used to get frustrated because I’d bring my work home…in more ways than one.”

  “And she didn’t?”

  “No, she had this ability to leave work mode behind and just be…” He seemed to slip into a memory of her.

  “Thank you for letting me stay here, James.”

  He blinked as he rose from his thoughts. “Of course.”

  “Is that a boathouse I saw out back?”

  “It doubles as a workshop.”

  “Can I see?”

  “Sure.” James led me out and along the back of the house. We entered the workspace and there in the center hung an upside-down boat named Liberty.

  “What happened to it?” I asked.

  “Broke loose from the dock during a storm a few years ago. I bought it for Victoria when we got married.”

  I ran my hand along the hull, admiring what it had once been. “You were both renovating it?”

  He looked astonished. “How can you tell?”

  “Victoria had a lighter touch.”

  “She insisted on helping.” He gave me an endearing smile.

  “How long have you been working on it?”

  He looked away as though unsure of the answer. I saw him staring at the boat’s name, doubt and sadness clouding his features.

  I suddenly realized the truth of his situation. If he finished renovating this boat it could very well represent saying goodbye to Victoria. He would finally have to face the fact that she wasn’t coming back.

  “Want to talk about it?” I said softly.

  “About what?”

  My chest tightened as I sensed he had no idea. That boat was never getting finished.

  “Let’s go back,” he said.

  We returned to the house.

  James opened the kitchen door for me. “Once you’re feeling better, we’ll fly back to London.”

  “Sounds like a plan.”

  “How old were you when you realized you were gay?”

  It made me smile. “I’m bi.”

  “I’ve never looked at a man…like that before.”

  “Like what?” I teased.

  He gave me a dazzling grin. “That’s some good rum.”

  I shook my head, amused.

  James set about making a fresh pitcher of iced tea. “Sounds like you can do a lot of damage with your AI skills.”